Chapter 17
Disclaimer: I don't own anything
It has been about ten minutes since Melinda, Steve, Phil, Daisy, Hunter and Mack left The Playground and as she sits in the cockpit and flies the plane Melinda hears footsteps and Steve walks in and sits in the co-pilot's seat.
"So, this is your new plane." Steve comments after about a minute of silence.
"It's S.H.I.E.L.D'S new plane." Melinda corrects, "I'm just the temporary pilot."
"So, you haven't decided whether you're returning to S.H.I.E.L.D for good." Steve realises, as he knows that whether Melinda chooses to stay with S.H.I.E.L.D or go back to The Avengers facility he will respect her choice, he will support her.
"No I haven't." Melinda admits.
"Well whatever you choose, I'm here for you Melinda, I'll support you." Steve informs Melinda, wanting to be clear that he means that.
"Thank you, Steve." Melinda says, feeling grateful for that, and the two of them drift into silence.
For a few minutes Steve watches Melinda out of the corner of his eye and as he does Steve realises what Melinda needs.
"I might go check in with Coulson, maybe talk to him about his card collection." Steve says as he stands up.
"Really?" Melinda asks surprised turning to look at him and as she does Melinda realises exactly why Steve is offering to subject himself to that, "Thank you."
"No problem." Steve says before exiting the cockpit, doing so because he knows Melinda needs some time to herself.
After Steve walks out of the cockpit he walks around the plane and honestly he has no idea where to go, he just knows that Melinda needs some time alone.
"Are you lost, Captain?" A voice asks and Steve turns to see Coulson.
"Um yeah, a little." Steve admits.
"I thought you were in the cockpit with Agent May." Phil comments.
"I was, but Agent May needs some alone time." Steve explains.
"I see." Phil says, not sure what else to say, "Would you like the grand tour of the plane, Captain?" he asks curious.
"Sure, I'd like that." Steve says and Phil starts to show him around, Coulson explaining different things to Steve as he shows him around, including what Daisy is doing.
Two hours later Melinda has landed the plane and are doing their final prep for the mission.
"You're taking a ICER?" Steve asks when he sees Melinda put a holster on.
"I'll need one." Melinda explains, "I'll take a regular gun from the enemies if I need it." Melinda explains and Steve nods.
"Remember what Dr Cho told you." Steve reminds Melinda.
"Like you would let me forget."
"Who's Doctor Cho?" Daisy's voice asks and both Melinda and Steve turn to look at her, "Eavesdropping, sorry. Whose Doctor Cho?" Skye asks curious.
"The Physician at the Avengers Facility." Steve explains.
"A Doctor, why would she tell you something?" Daisy asks, worry in her voice, "Are you hurt, May?"
"I'm fine." Melinda answer, telling the truth.
"But you weren't." Phil says, knowing because he knows Melinda, "Were you?" Phil says and Melinda looks annoyed that now all the eyes of everyone on the plane are on her, "May?"
"I got in the way of a grenade a few weeks ago, but I'm fine now." Melinda explains.
"In the way of a grenade?" Daisy asks, it being more than clear that she is worried about May, "How bad were you hurt?"
"Just a little bit of shrapnel damage." Melinda says with a shrug.
"It was more than a little." Steve corrects and Melinda turns to give him an annoyed look, "I'm just telling the truth." He informs Melinda.
"May? How bad was the damage?" Phil asks concerned.
"I had a lobe of my liver removed and my spleen was damaged a bit." Melinda explains, trying to make it sound like it's not a big deal.
"Should you even be on a mission?" Hunter asks curious.
"I've been cleared by medical, I'm fine." Melinda assures everyone, "Let's focus on the mission." Melinda requests, being annoyed that all attention is on her.
"Right." Phil says, "May, Captain I want you two to enter from the front, draw attention onto you, Daisy, Hunter, enter through the back and surprise them." Coulson instructs, "Mack you and I will stay here and monitor things, be back up, just in case." Phil says and everyone nods, Steve looking to Melinda who gives him a subtle nod, before he does so.
"Let's move out." Melinda says and that's exactly what everyone does.
A few minutes later Melinda and Steve are at the front entrance of the building and Melinda gives Steve a nod. As soon as he sees the nod Steve uses his shield to break the door open, and the both enter where they find a large group of people, including Grant Ward, who is holding something that Melinda recognizes but hoped never to see again. The only reason he hasn't been affected by what he is holding is because he is wearing gloves, which unknown to Melinda he plans to take off as soon as she attacks. The only reason he hasn't taken off the gloves is because he didn't want to deal with memories until he had to because he knew he only had one chance.
"Well, well, well, May I honoured, you brought the big guns." Ward says, trying to sound braver than he is, "The Captain and The Cavalry." Ward says with a mocking smirk.
"Don't call Agent May that." Steve says, without even thinking about it at the same time Melinda says, "Not again." Melinda says when she sees what he is holding,
"Agent May?" Steve ask concerned, and hearing the concern Ward smirks and says,
"You know Agent May tends to use people to relieve stress. I have intimate knowledge of that, do you, Captain?." Ward asks as he takes off one of his gloves, it being more than clear what he is implying.
"Knock the staff out of his hands." Melinda instructs, and without questioning, even though he is curious about Ward's comment, Steve throws his shield at Ward, who is holding the Berserker Staff. Due to the force of Steve's throw Ward sends the staff flying into the air as he is knocked over and because she has raced across the room Melinda catches the staff before anyone else can
Once Melinda catches the staff Steve sees it glow orange as she braches herself, then Melinda starts attacking. She sending people flying across the room which causes Steve to wonder just what the hell that thing is, and as she sends people flying Melinda takes one of their guns and fires at Ward, killing him with a head shot. While Melinda is doing that Steve goes after the people who are trying to run from Melinda, just as Daisy and Hunter burst in the back.
"COULSON, IT'S DAISY. The Berserker Staff is back in play. We need a containment case." Daisy tells Coulson through the coms when she realises exactly what is going on, "Oh and Ward's dead." She adds as an afterthought.
"Who's using it?" Coulson asks as Mack just gives him a confused look.
"May."
"Oh no." Phil says, "Mack with me." Phil says and he goes running.
A few minutes after Melinda picked up the Berserker Staff basically all the agents are down, Ward being the only fatality, with Daisy taking down the last few and seeing that it is safe to do so Melinda drops the staff and drops to her knees.
"MELINDA." Steve yells, rushing over to her when she drops, "Melinda, what happened?" Steve asks concerned as he kneels down next to Melinda, being careful not to touch her, "What is that thing?"
"Don't touch it." Melinda tells Steve, "It's Asgardian." Melinda explains, which honestly isn't much of an explanation.
"Coulson's bringing a containment case." Daisy explains.
"I've got it right here." Coulson's voice says coming in with Mack holding a case big enough to fit the staff, "We'll take it back with us and keep it somewhere safe."
"No." Melinda says as she forces herself to once more pick up the staff, "It doesn't belong on earth." Melinda says as she stands up, holding the staff.
"It can be kept in New York, until Thor's next visit then it can be given to him." Steve suggests as Melinda takes the staff over to the containment case.
"It would be for the best." Melinda says to Phil as she places the staff in the case, "It doesn't belong here, it never did. If it stays, then there is always the chance that someone may get it." Melinda tells Phil as she closes and seals the case.
"Okay. New York and Thor it is." Phil says, agreeing because the two people he respects the most are agreeing, as Melinda walks over to Ward's body, where Daisy already is, both of them needing to see for sure that Ward is definitely dead.
"He's really gone." Daisy says when May walks over
"Yeah he is." Melinda confirms, looking down at Ward's dead body.
Ten minutes later everyone is on the plane, and because she disappeared as soon as they all walked in Steve has gone in search of Melinda but he finds the door to the cockpit locked, something which concerns him greatly, so instead Steve goes in search of Coulson so that he can get some answers about what the staff is.
It takes a little bit of searching but Steve manages to find Coulson, and seemingly in the middle of something.
"Sorry to bother you Director, but can we talk?" Steve asks curious.
"Of course." Phil says putting the table down, "Take a seat, Captain." Phil says and Steve does just that, "I take it you're worried about, May." Coulson comments as after what happened he assumes that's what's going on.
"I am." Steve confirms, "I went to talk on her, but the door to the cockpit is locked." Steve explains.
"I'm not surprised." Phil says, telling the compete truth.
"What was that thing?" Steve asks as if he knew what it would then maybe he could figure out a way to help.
"It's an Asgardian Weapon known as the Berserker Staff. It's something our team has come into contact with before. Anyone who uses it receives an adrenaline rush and a burst of super-strength fuelled by the uses worse, most hated, memories, which they re-experience." Phil explains, "For May, that's…."
"Bahrain." Steve finishes, to Coulson's shock, realising what that truly means.
"Do you know what happened?" Coulson asks as it seems like he does and that shocks him.
"I do."
"Did Natasha or Fury tell you?" Coulson asks curious as not counting May, there are only five, living people, who know what happened and it wasn't him or Daisy and he very much doubts that it was Andrew.
"Neither. Melinda did." Steve reveals and Phil is completely shocked about that.
"Wow, I um wasn't expecting that." Phil admits, having no idea what else to say as he knows how big of a deal it is for Melinda to tell anyone what happened.
"The staff, does it have any other side effects?" Steve asks, partly wanting answers and partly wanting to change the subject as Coulson is Melinda's best friend which means it's up to her to decide how much Coulson knows about them.
"Exhaustion." Phil answers, focusing on the task at hand, "This isn't the first time May's had to use it. She slept for a long time last time, once she could." He explains as after they first got to the Playground, the first time Melinda could sleep after using the Berserker Staff for the second time, she slept for two days straight.
"Okay. Thank you, Coulson." Steve says standing up, "That's what I wanted to know." Steve says as he starts to head to the door.
"You're welcome." Phil says, "Captain." Phil says and Steve turns back around to look at him, "Whatever it is that is going on between you and Melinda she'll try and push you away after the reminder the staff just gave her, if you care about her then don't let her, Melinda needs support even if she's convinced herself otherwise." Phil informs Steve.
"Thank you, Sir." Steve says before walking out of the room.
After leaving where Phil was Steve heads back to the cockpit. Once he gets there Steve makes himself comfortable outside the door, just waiting for Melinda to open it so that he can do whatever he can to help.
For two hours Steve stays outside of the cockpit and honestly he isn't surprised when the door doesn't open. When the plane lands Steve knows that eventually Melinda is going to have to come out so he waits and within a few minutes the door opens and Melinda walks out.
"Captain." Melinda says when she sees him, not even looking surprised.
"Agent May." Steve says in response and as Melinda takes a step forward she stumbles a little, "Are you okay?" Steve asks as he reaches out for her.
"I'm so tired." Melinda says, realising that having very little sleep for the last few days, actually weeks, and then using the staff wasn't a good idea.
"Okay, do you need help getting to your bunk?" Steve asks, and Melinda gives a small nod which shocks Steve as he knows how big that is, "Okay, I've got you Melinda." Steve says and Melinda leans against Steve which allows him to put his arm around her, and in return Melinda puts her arm around him and they start to walk, as they do Steve is pretty sure that Melinda would fall if he wasn't helping her.
"So that thing is an Asgardian weapon that was left on earth by an Asgardian who stayed because he fell in love with Humanity?" Mack asks as he, Daisy, Fitz, Simmons, Bobbi and Hunter are in the common area. Fitz, Simmons and Daisy are explaining all about the Staff.
"Yeah. The Asgardian hid it so that no one would get their hands on it." Daisy explains, "Last we knew it was hidden in rubble in Cuba."
"Ward must have dug it out." Simmons says, "He would have known exactly where it was."
"He probably thought it was his only chance to beat May." Daisy comments as that seems like something Ward would do.
"Probably." Fitz confirms, and neither he nor Daisy or Simmons sound upset that Ward has been killed.
"What does it do? Why would Ward think he could beat May with it?" Bobbi asks curious.
"Strength fuelled by pain, rage and hatred." Fitz explains.
"And May's used it before?" Hunter asks.
"Twice." Daisy answers with a nod, "And both times she was able to cope, mostly, but the Asgardian who left it said that it takes decades to deal with the affects, May using it so much in such a short amount of time can't be good." Daisy says, it being clear that she is worried
"I think you're right." Mack says staring out of the windows and everyone looks to see May being helped down the corridor by Steve, looking like she can barely stand.
"May." Daisy says, about to head out there but before she can Bobbi grabs her arm.
"Let Captain Rogers help her." Bobbi tells her, "May wouldn't want you, or any of us, to see her like this." Bobbi says, knowing that for a fact.
"I really wish you weren't right." Daisy admits as she watches May go, being very worried about her.
It takes a while but with Steve's help Melinda finally manages to get back to her bunk. Once they are in the bunk Steve helps Melinda over to her bed.
"I'll make sure the others don't bother you." Steve tells Melinda once he has helped her.
"Actually Steve, do you mind staying?" Melinda asks surprising Steve, "I don't want to be alone." Melinda admits as she takes off her boots, the leather vest, and the long sleave top she is wearing so that she is only wearing pants and a tank top.
"Sure." Steve says and honestly he isn't really sure what to do so he stands awkwardly.
"I meant will you lie next to me." Melinda explains as she puts her phone on charge on the bedside table, lies down and sees how awkward Steve is.
"Oh sure." Steve says as he takes off his shield, shoes, and the top part of his outfit so that he is wearing a t-shirt and pants.
Once Steve has removed the more restrictive items of clothing that he is wearing he walks over and lies next to Melinda.
"Go to sleep Melinda, I'm right here." Steve says as he can tell how exhausted she is but at the same time it is clear that she doesn't want to sleep.
"As soon as I close my eyes I'm going to see it again." Melinda reveals, "I just want to avoid that as long as possible." Melinda says as even though she sees what she did ever day after using the Berserker staff she doesn't just see it; she experiences it again.
"I can't imagine how hard that would be." Steve says, trying to be as supportive as possible, "You've used the staff before, you knew what it did, why did you pick it up again?" Steve asks curious.
"Because if I didn't someone else would have." Melinda says, "Someone else would be in pain and I couldn't let that happen." Melinda admits as she knows what the staff does and that's something that she wouldn't want anyone, including Ward, to experience.
"You're amazing, you know that Melinda." Steve informs her, looking at her with a look of amazement on his face.
"No I'm not." Melinda says, believing that.
"Yes, you are." Steve says as he puts an arm out so that he can put it around Melinda if she moves, "I believe that and you should too."
"I don't think I can." Melinda admits as she moves close to Steve which allows him to put his arm around her.
"You should." Steve says as he places a kiss on Melinda's head, "Because it's true, you're amazing Melinda, incredible and I can't believe that you can't see that."
"I honestly don't know what to say to that." Melinda admits.
"Then don't say anything." Steve suggests, "Close your eyes, get some sleep and I'll do everything I can to help keep your pain away." Steve offers.
"Thank you." Melinda says leaning up and kissing Steve. Once they break apart Melinda leans on Steve's chest, but doesn't close her eyes, "What Ward said…" Melinda starts to as she feels the exhaustion really start to hit.
"We don't have to talk about that now." Steve says, knowing that what is most important is Melinda getting the rest she need.
"I do." Melinda says, "Ward used sex as a stress reliever, or so I thought, but it turns out he was using it to distract me so I wouldn't realise what he was really doing." Melinda reveals, being pretty sure that if she wasn't so tired she wouldn't be explaining it so bluntly, all she knows is that she needs Steve to know, "I hate myself for not seeing that, I didn't have feelings for him." Melinda informs Steve, "You're different, it's not like with us. You matter, you're important, we are important to me" Melinda says eyes drifting closed for a few seconds.
"So are you, i feel the same wy." Steve says, feeling incurably happy, but considering she is so exhausted Steve realizes that Melinda may not have intended to say what she just said so he won't mentioning it when she wakes unless she does. "You shouldn't hate yourself. He used you." Steve says, not sure what to think, though he knows that he is furious, but at Ward not Melinda as no one should use another person in that way.
"I should have seen it coming, I should have realised." Melinda says and her eyes flicker open and closed, it being clear that she is having a harder time staying awake.
"You couldn't have. It's okay." Steve says, knowing that there are a few things he would like to do to Ward if he was still alive, "It's okay, Melinda. We're okay. Go to sleep." Steve says and Melinda gives a week nod and closes her eyes. Within about a minute Melinda is fast asleep and seeing that Steve pulls the blanket up and covers Melinda, never once removing the arm he has around her.
About half an hour after Melinda has fallen asleep Steve pull his phone out of his internal pocket, checks to make sure it is on silent and sends a message to Maria saying, 'There is an artefact here that needs to be given to Thor. Any chance someone can come and collect it?' because he wants it secure as soon as possible,and within a minute he gets a response saying, 'Nat, Tony and I will be there in 50 minutes.'
Forty minutes after receiving the response from Maria Steve gets up and being as careful as possible not to wake Melinda, not that he would be able to with how exhausted she is, Steve gets up and heads in search of Coulson.
Thinking that his best chance to find Coulson will be his office Steve heads towards there but the second he steps into the common area Daisy, Fitz and Simons rush towards him.
"Is May okay?" Skye asks worried.
"Does she need anything?" Fitz asks.
"You need to make sure May eats and gets electrolytes. Does she need medical attention?" Simmons asks.
As Steve looks at the three worried young agents he realises just how important Melinda is to them and as he looks over at Bobbi, Hunter and Mack he realises that even though they aren't bombarding him with questions they are worried too.
"Agent May is asleep." Steve says, "She doesn't need medical attention and I will make sure she gets something to eat and drink when she wakes." Steve assures the worried agents.
"You didn't answer my question, is May okay?" Daisy asks worried.
"She's as okay as she can be." Steve says, "Promise." Steve says giving Daisy a comforting smile, "Where's Coulson? I need to talk to him about something."
"He's up in his office." Bobbi explains.
"Thank you." Steve says before heading upstairs.
About a minute later Steve arrive at the door to Phil's office and he knocks.
"Come in." Phil says a few seconds later and Steve walks in.
"Captain, how's Agent May?" Phil asks when he sees Steve.
"Sleeping, but okay, considering the circumstances." Steve answers, "Maria Hill, Natasha and Tony will be here in about ten minutes to collect the Staff."
"I see." Phil says, surprised by that, "Will it be kept somewhere safe until Thor can collect it?"
"Yes." Steve answers, "There is a room at the Facility that only The Vision can open. We have a system to put things in it but only he can get things out, it will be safe in there until Thor comes back." Steve explains, knowing that Coulson knows how trusted the Vision is as Maria told him everything.
"Sounds good to me." Phil says, "I'll show you where the case with the staff is." Phil says and they both head out of his office.
A few minutes later Phil and Steve have collected the containment case containing the staff and are waiting as a Quinjet flies in and lands. About a minute after the Quinjet lands the ramp opens and Natasha, Maria, Tony and Clint walk out, or in Clint's case runs out.
While Natasha, Maria and Tony walk calmly Clint runs forward and throws his arms around Phil.
"I'm so glad you're alive." Clint says as he is seeing his friend for the first time since he thought he died, "I'm so sorry Phil, it was all my fault."
"It wasn't your fault." Phil says as he returns the hug, "It's okay, Clint. I don't blame you." Phil assures him, "Nat, Stark, Maria." Phil greats when he and Clint break apart.
"I'm really glad to see you, Phil." Natasha says with a smile, as she looks him up and down, almost like she has is looking for a sign that something is different.
"I'm glad to see you too."
"Agent." Tony says, it being clear that he doesn't quite believe what he is seeing, "That was stupid. You were an idiot for going after Loki."
"It's Director now, and I was just doing my job." Phil says.
"You're always Agent to me, and it is good to see you." Tony admits, giving Phil a smile.
"Where's Mel?" Maria asks curious as she looks around and sees that Melinda isn't with Steve and Phil.
"Sleeping." Steve answers.
"Really?" Natasha asks shocked, "It's still early." She comments as Melinda never goes to bed this early.
"In this case is an Asgardian Weapon called The Berserker Staff…" Steve explains.
"Please tell me that Mel didn't have to fight with it again." Natasha request, cutting Steve off, it being clear that she knows exactly what it is.
"She did." Steve confirms.
"Damn it." Natasha says angrily.
"Okay, confusion here, what is this thing?" Tony asks looking down at the case.
"Like Captain Rogers said it's an Asgardian Weapon known as the Berserker Staff that an Asgardian Warrior who stayed on earth centuries ago hid." Phil explains, "Anyone who uses it receives an adrenaline rush and a burst of super-strength fuelled by the uses worse, most hated, memories, which they re-experience, which leads to exhaustion and the Asgardian who left it told us that it can take decades to for the affects to completely disappear." Phil explains.
"How many times has Melinda fought with it?" Tony asks curious.
"Today makes three." Phil explains, "May was the one who said to get it to Thor, to get it off earth and because she is the only one who has experienced it I agreed."
"We'll keep it safe until Thor comes back." Natasha says.
"Don't let anyone touch it, Melinda touched it herself, put the pain on herself, to make sure no one else had to." Steve tells everyone, "And no studying it, put it straight in the vault." He says looking at Tony.
"But…" Tony starts to say and Steve just gives him a look, "Right, put it in the vault, will do." Tony says.
"We'll make sure he does." Maria says.
"Thank you."
"We better load it up. Take the other end." Clint tells Tony and he nods. While Tony and Clint are loading the case into the plane Natasha walks over to Steve.
"How is she really doing?" Natasha asks, "And don't lie to me, Rogers." Natasha says, there being an undertone of a threat to her voice.
"Melinda's okay. She's sleeping and honestly I would like to get back to her." Steve tells Natasha.
"Go. I'll make sure that that thing goes straight in the vault." Natasha promises, "Just get her to call me when she wakes."
"I will. Thanks, Nat." Steve says before heading back inside the base.
A few minutes later Steve arrives back in Melinda's bunk and once he does he once more lays next to Melinda moves so that she can once more lie on his chest and puts his arm around her promising himself that he won't leave Melinda again until she wakes.
For three days Steve lies next to Melinda. After twenty-four hours he started to become worried about how long Melinda had been sleeping and so he got Simmons to run some tests and she assured him that Melinda is fine, she is just completely exhausted.
"Steve." Melinda's voice says after lunch on the third day and Steve looks down to see Melinda wide awake.
"Hey." Steve says with a smile.
"How long have I been asleep for?" Melinda asks.
"Three days."
"Really?" Melinda asks surprised.
"Yeah." Steve confirms.
"Wow." Melinda says, not sure what she thinks about that, "Have you been here the entire time?"
"Yeah, well except for a couple of times I had to leave." Steve answers.
"Thank you." Melinda says gratefully.
"You don't have to thank me." Steve says, "I told you that I wasn't going to leave and it gave me a chance to think."
"What about?" Melinda asks curious and a little concerned that what he thought about was about what Ward said.
"You shouldn't have to choose."
"What?" Melinda asks confused.
"You shouldn't have to choose between here and New York. You shouldn't have to choose between two groups of people who care about you and I have an idea for a way where you won't have to." Steve reveals to Melinda's shock as in the last three days he has seen how much the people at the Playground cares about Melinda and he knows what she means to people in New York and he doesn't believe it is fair to make her chose between them.