AN: Alright, two more shoutouts here!

This one's for Rebloxic, if you guys have been living under a rock, he's the guy who's made such classics as Apocalyptic Survival, Big Brother and plenty others! The guy's really funny and talented, so be sure to check out his stuff if you get a chance! We're also working on Twisted Fates together if you were interested!

Next up is Bubbles2K100 (AKA Meg) – she's a really talented writer and would looooovvveee for you guys to review her stories! Trust me, they're really excellent and bring home the feels lol! Her and Rebloxic are actually working on a story together as well, so if you have the time then definitely check out Baby Clementine and Diving Into the Unknown!

Btw, I'm making Clem fifteen, since I'm going to say that this chapter is her birthday of sorts. So happy birthday, Clem :)

Also, we still need signatures for the Lilly Petition (I think it was 219 needed, last time I checked). If you'd like to sign and possibly make a difference, then I have the link for the petition in my profile. Thanks!

CLEM'S AGE: 15, Clem's POV

Another day, another year that passes by. Another year that I've beaten the odds and overcome this hell of a world that we all inhabit nowadays.

That's right, world – I've played your little game, and I've won this round yet again. You've tried to break me, tried to beat me down senselessly and have almost caused me to throw in the towel on several occasions.

But not today. I'm not giving into the temptation; not gonna call it quits just because it's hard. Living is difficult – it's dying that's the easy part. All you'd have to do is sit back and let go.

Clinging to your last breath and fighting so that your group can have food for just one more night? Nothing in this world can compare to the overwhelming helplessness you feel when you're down on your luck, starving and trying to hold onto one sliver of hope.

Yes, living is by far more difficult than dying.

But the pay-off is always worth it, no matter the cost and heartache. Living is all we have to look forward to.

"Living is everything…" I repeat quietly under my breath, calmly stroking Ellie's head as I've been doing for the past few hours or so. She fell fast asleep quite a while ago on my lap, and yet for some strange reason I haven't had the desire to move her. It's a sort of calming sensation that overtakes me when I'm close to this kid – it makes me feel like I'm actually doing some good in a person's life instead of trying too hard and making things worse.

That's the one thing about being in the cabin crew and the group after we had escaped Howe's that I absolutely despised. Every single day, people would doubt me and think that I was completely incapable of anything. Carlos definitely thought that way, as did Bonnie, Nick, Rebecca, Alvin… hell, I think even Luke might've at one point. He might not have said it, but I could tell.

Even Kenny did to a certain extent. Always badgering me about what I could and couldn't do… it's not that I didn't appreciate what they were trying to do for me, but in all honesty I think their incessant need to look after me was holding me back.

Maybe that's why I felt so strongly towards Jane at first.

Hoping that I don't end up being too overprotective towards Ellie, I reluctantly shuffle off the bed without waking her up at all. This break that I'm getting is really messing with my head, and in all honesty it's getting me pretty frustrated. I don't need time off! I'm not retiring or anything, and I'm certainly not getting old! I don't want or need to go out on the weekends to play golf and drink tea and chat like the rest of the old geezers used to do! I don't intend to be mean about it, but you get the idea!

Feeling that a nice, brisk walk at night will be enough to clear my head, I open the drawer to get my pistol as I prepare to head out. If that "talk" that we're going to have tomorrow is as meaningless as I picture it'll be, then I'm gonna need all the opportunities to clear my head that I can afford.

Fondly brushing a loose strand of red hair away from her angelic face, I plant a light kiss on Ellie's forehead as I start to head out.

"Sweet dreams, kiddo," I whisper, opening the door and quietly shutting it closed behind me.

I used to hate shopping at places like this when I was a kid, and it certainly doesn't bring up any fond memories now as I open the door to an old, abandoned clothing store. I'd practically beg my mom not to take me here whenever she was going out to do errands, but somehow I almost always wound up accompanying her anyways. Unfortunately, Sandra had a life outside of just trying to look after me, so I had no choice to go through the depths of hell and get bored out of my mind while my mother made me try on about a thousand different outfits.

They're just clothes! Why do they have to match? I'm gonna put whatever I feel like on anyways, I remember telling her once, to which she just giggled and said that I'd figure it out when I was older; that I'd somehow appreciate it more.

Well, I'm now fifteen now (as far as I can tell), and my hatred of clothes shopping hasn't diminished in that time span. I do have to admit though; it still doesn't smell half bad even though there are walkers lurking about.

Pulling out my gun, I hold it out in front of me as I prepare to end their undead lives. Grr… Can't they just leave me alone for ONE DAY?!

A bullet whizzes into the first walker's cranium as it falls flat onto the hardwood floor, as does its buddy as I put another bullet into the second one's head. James' explanation of what goes on inside of their heads keeps ringing in my ears, and I can't help but wonder if at some point the walkers will just… just rot themselves away like an old apple or something. I mean, they're dead, right? Shouldn't that mean that like any dead person, their bodies will eventually just disintegrate or something? That'd certainly help move things along.

Not wanting to waste too many bullets on walkers that I could take out in other ways, I put my gun into my pocket as I grab onto a partially-melted candle stick that they used to sell back in the day. The metal thing that holds it up is still attached to it, so I pull out my lighter and ignite the wick on top.

Candles are good for one thing – romantic dinners, and fighting off dead guys.

Kicking the beast in the knee as I have done so many times before, I bring the flame close to the walker's head as it snarls at me. It can't feel pain, but it's rather disturbing seeing the skin and hair quickly start melting away as I conduct my experiment. Will fire be enough to kill them? Or will it just make them even freakier-looking than they were before?

I decide to find out for myself as I crunch my shoe on the back of both of its legs; hearing a sickening snapping sound as its brittle bones are crushed underneath my heels. The walker's head burns intensely as the wood underneath it crackles and burns. Only the entrance part of the floor is made of wood, so thankfully nothing else will catch fire, and it sure as hell manages to add some much-needed light to this dim, dark building.

I don't even feel an ounce of sympathy for the creature as I turn away to examine some of the clothing racks that haven't been looted yet. If anyone else were here with me, I'd probably seem completely insane, but what they don't know won't hurt them… Sometimes I need a little dark side to balance out the light, you know?

Knowing that the fire will only burn for so long, I begin examining the various racks and shelves as I start searching for what I really came here for – something a little more respectable than just a ratty, old t-shirt. Even in the apocalypse, I need to make sure that I seem like I know what I'm doing. How am I supposed to inspire the masses if I'm dressed like a hobo?

Seeing nothing but dresses, brightly-coloured rain coats and scattered shoes at first, I start to get discouraged about finding anything useful. Take only what we need, I remember Lilly telling me once, and unfortunately none of these really match the bill as far as I can see. How ridiculous would I be, trying to lead a group of adults wearing a bright yellow, rubber-looking rain jacket? I'd look like a rubber duck in that thing!

As I'm about to cut my losses and head back, out of the corner of my eye I see something just sitting there in the corner – a dusty, old, brownish-black leather jacket that's only been weathered by time. Other than smelling a little musty and having a small tear here and there, this thing almost looks brand new.

Hearing the walker snarl and the flesh burns away from its bones, I bring the jacket with me outside a small fitting room with a cracked mirror.

A cracked mirror means a cracked soul, according to some of my more superstitious friends back at the space centre. I usually just tune out their conversations about how standing in front of a cracked mirror signals your death, and I always make a point of it to try and do all of the things that they say never to do. Bad luck doesn't exist – everything happens for a reason.

Even if that reason seems completely crazy and out of our hands, we still have to accept the fact that these events still occur.

Placing my backpack on the floor, I slip my arms through the sleeves of the jacket as I give it a quick once-over in the un-smashed sections of the mirror. Not too shabby, if I do say so myself. Combined with my brownish-beige cargo pants that I'm wearing, I'd say that I look a lot more like a leader than I did before. Appearances aren't everything, mind you, but in certain circumstances they sure do help.

Heh, only took me two or three years, Jane, I think smugly to myself, reminded of our conversation back when we were looking for Sarah, Luke and Nick. As a matter of fact, I think that I look a lot more like Jane than I had before – it's kind of a cool feeling, I must say.

But the big, messy bush on my head has definitely got to go next. It's about time that I've had another haircut.

Grabbing an old pair of scissors out of my pack, I bring up a chair as I take my hat off and gingerly place it on the floor. Alright, just like last time. Nice and easy, just… just like Lee had done it before.

…sometimes thinking about him occasionally gets me into a moment of pause and reflection. While our time together was very short, he still taught me quite a lot of the basics about survival – shooting a gun, keeping the hair short, how to avoid walkers, how to keep you and your crew safe, that kind of thing.

I know that it's bad, but if it weren't for me being able to see and hear him in my head from time to time, I wouldn't even remember what he looked like. It's been six years now, I think, and I've met so many people now that it's not exactly a surprise.

Doesn't mean I feel great about it though.

Undoing the hair ties that Lilly gave me so long ago, I frown as I realize that one of them is almost entirely ripped to shreds, and the other one's not faring much better. They were pretty damn sturdy while they lasted, but like the rest of me, maybe it's time for a change.

Staring in the mirror as I hold the scissors delicately in my hand, for a brief moment I can see myself as an eight year old once again; seeing Lee standing right behind me on the train and showing me the realities of life. That was the day that I finally came to realize that it wasn't gonna be all fun and games – from then on out, I needed to know how to take care of myself. There might not have always been someone around to show me how to do things, and eventually the day would come where I'd have to put my survival skills to the test.

Looks like I passed that, at least. Taking the scissors, I raise them behind my head and start cutting the jungle that is my hair. By the time I finish and hunks of hair are left scattered all over the floor, I look like a whole new person – a sharper, more respectable person.

Figuring originally that I was just going to put my hair back into the signature two ponytails that I normally would do, I stop for a moment and hold the back of it into just one. Deciding to try it out for a bit of a change of pace, I place the other hair thingy (as I still don't know what it's called) back into my bag as I nod at my reflection. There – a jacket like Jane's, and a haircut kind of like Lilly's. I guess they've really rubbed off on me after all.

With a new look to start off the next chapter of my life, I briefly debate on whether I should leave my hat in my bag and start off my fifteenth year completely different.

…ha! As if! Chuckling, I immediately erase the thought from my mind before I shake my head and put it back on.

There are just certain things that should always be there, you know? My hat practically defines me for most people.

I finish with the little grooming just in time as the fire finally starts to die out, leaving a burnt, undead corpse in its wake as I quietly walk back towards the entrance. Looks to me as though fire doesn't completely kill walkers, but it certainly makes them a hell of a lot weaker, as this guy can barely find it within himself to look up at me.

Picking up the metal candle stick mold once again, I bash the walker's head in until the thing is actually stuck within the skull and dark, crimson blood oozes down the side of it. One less to deal with, I internally think as I leave the place behind for good; riddled with dead bodies as I start heading back to the space centre.

Best if nobody finds out what I've done here tonight, wouldn't you say?

Tommy's POV

"BO! DON'T YOU FUCKING WALK AWAY FROM ME!" I yell down the hallway; hands balled into fists as I angrily stomp my way towards him. Honestly, I couldn't give two shits if everyone else heard what I am about to say to this punk. It'd certainly make things easier on me and more difficult on him. "Turn around and face me like a man! I've got a bone to pick with you, asshole!"

Sighing as if he's heard this sort of thing a thousand times before, Bo reluctantly stops in his tracks as he waits for me to approach. This is it – I've finally made my decision, and all there is left to do now is to seal the deal. After this, I'll never have to deal with him or James ever again.

Fuck this place. I don't care if its intentions are good – it still doesn't justify the harsh treatment that it dishes out without anyone noticing. But I know, oh yes. They thought that they could hide this shit from everyone and keep anybody from questioning their ambitious motives, but I'm not willing to turn a blind eye any longer. Not to this.

I wouldn't even call it experimenting. That'd be an insult to all the medical professionals and scientific wizards who actually tried to help people with legitimate means.

"What? Did I leave the laundry in for too long again?" he jokes, though I'm in no mood for any of his games. This is serious business here. "Now judging by your face, I'd say that you're not exactly here to have a nice, friendly chat," he adds, raising a questioning eyebrow. "What's the deal here, Tommy? Have you been enjoying your stay at the Space Centre Hotel these past few years? You really ought to try and help out some more around here, otherwise people might start to think – "

"Shut up," I hiss, glaring intensely at him to show that I'm not kidding around. "I've had more than enough of you and your repulsive, bitchy face staring at me behind my back. And I don't give a shit about your stupid threats anymore, Bo. I'm getting you off my back one and for all – I'm done."

"I'm sure you'll be making a point eventually?"

Jabbing a finger roughly in his chest, I suddenly feel like my angry, jacked-up brother than myself for a second. Joel was always the tougher one of the two of us, while I'd like to think I had more on the brains side.

Sometimes, however, I wish that I could be nearly as intimidating as my big brother used to be whenever you pissed him off. It wouldn't make me a whole lot of friends, but it'd certainly make me feel a bit better knowing that I could instill some fear into my enemies.

"I don't care what kind of reasons you have behind it! There's absolutely no way I'm just gonna stand by and watch as you tear this place apart with your fucked up ambitions!" I rage, surprised at how much venom I'm able to put behind my words. Bo doesn't seem too impressed with me. "And you threatening my life like that? You really think that shit's gonna fly with me? I'd sooner chop off your balls and feed 'em to the wolves than let you tie me to a fucking tree! That does it! I'm finished with you! I'm finished with this whole fucking place, and I hope that all that murdering you and James have been doing comes crashing down on top of you!"

Wiping a wad of my spit off of his face and leering at me with malice, Bo tries to come up with a comeback as I begin to turn around and leave. I don't wanna stick around here any longer than I have to. I've said my piece, and I've got no regrets for what I've said to him. As far as I'm concerned, that was a long time coming.

I do feel a little inkling of sadness, however, as it seems that Ellie's been hiding behind the corner the whole time and had just listened to me swear like an idiot at the man.

"Ellie," Bo calls out as I stop a ways away from her, "go back to your room, alright? Or how about you head downstairs and I'll meet you in a few? Tommy and I have to have… a grownup talk."

"But I want to – "

"Just do it, alright? No excuses, I don't want you to hear this."

Getting a wicked idea, I turn my head back towards Bo with a terrible glint in my eye. This could be a wonderful opportunity to get Bo to spill the beans himself.

I've got a gun in my pocket just in case.

"I think that she deserves to know, wouldn't you say?" I remark smugly, raising my hands to the side to prove my point. "She lives here – she's just as much a part of this community as you or I are! Why not stand up and face the music here, Bo? Tell her! Tell her the real reason that you and James have been sneaking behind people's backs and – "

"GO!" Bo roars, startling the poor kid as she nods and quickly does as requested. What a fucking cowardly asshole… I knew that he wouldn't fess up!

Once he's assured that Ellie's made her way back downstairs and out of earshot for good, Bo storms over to me in a fit of calm yet seething rage. He doesn't tend to blow up, and this is the furthest that I've ever seen him go in terms of anger. I'll admit, he can be a pretty scary guy if you test him too much.

I think that I just did.

As if the emotion is too much for his body to handle, Bo shakes around as he tries to form a coherent sentence. Too much disbelief that I'd be willing to take it this far, I'd imagine.

"Do you even possess a working brain here, Tommy?" he questions, tapping on his skull as his eyes scan me for answers. "You going out there and blabbing about what you think you saw would just jeopardize the whole system, and for what? What could you possibly hope to gain out of it, other than threatening even more wasted lives?" he continues as a vein starts popping out of his neck. "Is that really what you want, Tommy? More blood on your hands? I would've thought that murdering my friends here before would be enough for you, but apparently not! Apparently not even close!"

Putting me at a disadvantage as I recall all of those families and people that were torn apart by bullet shells, I try to keep my composure and act like I'm not being affected by his words. Unfortunately, Bo seems to see right through my mask.

"That's not what I want…"

"No, no, no… what you want is irrelevant. Your notions of what's right or wrong are completely irrelevant, and whether or not you approve of what we do here is also irrelevant," he interrupts crossly as he decides to rail on the insults in a last-ditch effort to see me fail. "Whether you like it or not," he adds, "our operation here is working to save the future of our species – sometimes in order to win the big prize, you have a lot more to give up than you do for the smaller ones. I'm not gonna sit here and try to justify myself because I know that you're too… self-righteous to ever see the good we're doing here!"

Pausing to catch his breath, I can see the hatred and self-loathing in his eyes, as if even he knows that what he's doing is some of the worst shit that you could possibly do. Together, he and James are plucking unsuspecting people off the street and handing them a death sentence in order for "the good of humanity", but even Bo can't deny that they've become too far gone. If hell actually exists, then I'm sure that those two already have reserved seats.

Come to think of it, though, wouldn't we all be going to hell for some socially-constructed notion of good and evil? Who got to make the rules when the dead came back to life? I certainly didn't get an invite to that meeting!

"I used to be like you; used to believe that there was always another way," he admits, shutting his eyes for a brief moment. "But we've looked, Tommy. We've looked, and there is absolutely nothing else out there! So why don't you get off your moral high horse and see the world for what it really is?!"

Despite giving me a lot to think about, I've also got a question for Bo that might cause him to take a step back and reflect on his actions. Maybe this will put things into perspective for him.

"…can I ask you something?" I start off, giving him one last look in the eye before I get ready to leave this place behind permanently. "If you're so sure that this is the only way… how's about you put yourself in the chair next time? See how it feels to have your brain fluid sucked out like a straw. Who knows? Maybe you're the magical cure for humanity…"

Leaving him looking torn and utterly speechless, I let him know how pathetic this is as his gaze drops to the floor and I head out down the hallway to pack my things.

That's what I thought, jackass…

Clem's POV

"Damn… looking spiffy there, Clem!" Jane chuckles as I roll my eyes in amusement. It's really nothing spectacular – just a small change in attire from beforehand. The sleeves may be a little long right now, but I'm sure that I'll grow into it more when I'm a bit older.

For now, it might be a bit of a pain having to roll up the sleeves every single time I need to go out somewhere.

We're up on the roof once again – a familiar spot for all three of us at this point, but it seems like an odd place to have a chat. Usually someone comes up here if they want to just have a nice, quiet evening with nobody else around to bother them, but I suppose this'll do alright for now. It lets Lilly stay on watch as well in case something happens.

Let's get this show on the road, shall we?

"Well… I'm here," I point out, feeling that this is a little out of place. Usually we don't need to set up a damn meeting in order to speak to each other. "So, what did you guys need? Why did you want me up here?"

Sighing as she bends forward a little bit, Lilly motions for me to sit in one of the chairs as she offers me a small smile. "You're on a break, Clem – you can ease off the throttle a little bit," she tells me as I find the irony of her statement. Lilly telling me to take it easy is like Carver telling a person to stop hurting people. "We just want to have a little fun for a change, you know? Like back in the good, old days!"

"Good, old days, huh? Like back when you and Jane were constantly trying to rip each other's heads off while I had to sit around and watch?" I question with a raised eyebrow. "Those don't seem like fun, happy times to me. Now what did you really want to ask me about? I shouldn't be sitting up here all safe and sound while the rest of our group is off on some dangerous hunt across the countryside!"

Seeing's how I don't plan on reliving our so-called "glory days", Jane and Lilly turn to each other before shrugging their shoulders. It amazes me sometimes how the two of them by saying so little can communicate so much with each other. Do they have psychic powers or something? Can they communicate telepathically?

Maybe they've got invisible antennas growing out of their heads, Duck suggests as I shudder and whisper for him to be quiet. He's not a part of this conversation right now – he has to wait his turn!

My insides tighten as Jane and Lilly both see what I just did.

"…Clem, you need to tell us what's been going on with you," Jane asks cautiously, trying her best not to step into dangerous territory. No… god damn it, this can't be happening right now! "We can't put it off any longer, alright? We're your friends, Clementine – whatever's going on inside your head right now, we can help you with it. Or at least try to anyways."

"There's nothing to talk about…" I growl, suddenly feeling very insecure as I start to shy away from the two of them. "Please, just… just stop it! I'm fine!"

"Clementine… you tried to kill the both of us. You almost did," Lilly points out, not angrily but in a kind of sympathetic way. "We didn't know what it was you were going through at the time, so Jane and I never said a word about it. But you're hurting, Clem. You know it's true, and you know that we'd never betray your confidence."

Feeling extremely vulnerable and scared of what this could all mean, I practically shrivel into a ball as I wrap my arms around myself and shake my head; tears of fear and horror forming in my eyes as I furiously wipe them away. I intentionally chose to forget about that. I figured that if I tried hard enough, then I could just put that behind me and never have to bring it up ever again. But I was wrong – so very, very wrong.

They've done it… they've exposed me for what I really am…

"You… you're gonna hurt me," I accuse in a delusional fashion as I shake my head. "You and Jane are gonna lock me away! You're gonna tell James and then you're gonna leave me out in the woods to die! YOU THINK I'M FUCKING CRAZY!"

Jane, immediately sensing that this is going to shit, rushes towards me as she firmly places her hands on my shoulders. "Come on, you know that's not true! We would never do anything like that to you, I promise," she tells me, but I can't find it within myself to believe her. What if she's lying to me? What if all of this is just some sort of intervention where they're gonna try and rearrange things and plant shit inside my head?!

What if Jane and Lilly… aren't who I thought they were?

As both of their voices become a blur in my ears, seeing their mouths move and eyes grow wide in worry, my mind races at all the possibilities that could potentially occur if I let my guard down. The voices are my friends… not these impostors that surround me. The images I sprout up, the sweet, melodious voices telling me what I should and shouldn't be doing – those are the ones who speak the truth. They wouldn't lie to me, right? I mean, how messed up do people have to be if they stick themselves within my head and plant false ideas?

Feeling extremely defensive, I glare darkly at Jane as she continues her vain attempt to reassure me that everything's fine. No it's not fine! Nothing is anymore! You're all a bunch of liars, and I won't stand for it!

I can't even trust myself to do the right thing anymore, let alone Jane, Lilly and everyone else!

"I thought you were my friends…" I remark bitterly through my teeth, not wanting them to see me break down like this. At the same time, though, I don't really give a damn. In a miserable, twisted way, I want them to see the pain and anger that's been caused inside of me. If the cards have already been laid out on the table, then I might as well go all in.

"Clementine, you have to listen to us! We are your friends, remember? We spent all that time together back then!" Jane reminds me as Lilly nods in agreement. "You were the glue that kept us from drifting apart! You were right – we did try to hurt each other back then. But you stopped that from happening! Without you, we'd probably all be dead right now!"

Wanting to step in as well, Lilly tries her luck as she calmly places her rifle to the side as she carefully steps closer towards me. I match her steps by backing up little by little.

"We're not going to hurt you – you have my word. But you have to let us in," Lilly persists, sounding suspiciously like Mike back when he told me to give him the gun. Yeah, and look at how great that turned out! "That's what we brought you here for, kiddo. We're up here so that we can all just sit and talk about it – that's it. You're not the only one who's dealing with things, ok? You don't have to go through it alone."

"She's right, Clementine. We can all help you – all of us want to see you get better," Jane adds as I stop moving back altogether. I'm hanging on by a loose thread right now, and all it would take is one tiny cut… "Me, Lilly, Bo, James… everyone," she tells me, listing the people off of her damaged fingers. "And Ellie, Clementine. Think about Ellie – do you think she would want to see you like this? She can help you just like the rest of us can…"

That tiny thread has just been torn apart and lit on fire as the pieces shrivel up into ashes.

"LIAR! NO!" I bellow, going to take my gun out of my pocket but being unable to as Jane quickly snatches my wrist. I resort to pitifully banging my fist against her chest instead as I fear for the kid's safety for about the billionth time. "You… you won't take Ellie away from me! No! I won't let you touch her! Leave her alone!"

Looking confused, Jane reluctantly lets me go as I fall to my butt on the roof, holding my head in my hands as I try to put all the pieces together. I've gone and done it now – no doubt they're wondering what Ellie has to do with anything, and then the stuff of my nightmares will finally be coming true.

"What do you mean we'll take her away?" Lilly asks me as I look up at the two of them through bloodshot eyes. What the hell was I thinking by blaming these two? I'm so lost and confused… "Clem, what are you talking about? What does Ellie have to do with any of this?"

Realizing that it's now or never, I gulp as the energy just disappears out of my body. I've got no fight left; no beef with these two friends who have only been trying to help me this entire time. I can see that now.

But this is where all of my hope is going to die. There's no backing out of it now – I've dug my way into an early grave. You can pretty much kiss that special, little girl's future goodbye, and the last of my will to keep on fighting as well.

…unless…

"Ellie… she's…" I cut myself off, prepared to give a heartfelt sentiment as I pick myself up and dust myself off, "…it's her mom. I… I never told her this, but I found her mom dead in a fishing store before I saw her and Riley playing by the dumpsters," I weave the lie like a slippery snake, seeing as how this is the only way for me to be sure that her secret is kept completely under wraps. "It's been driving me insane just thinking about it… thinking about how I could ever say something like this to her. I found this note on her mom's body, but I never ended up showing it to her."

Carefully pulling it out of my pocket, I shakily hand the letter over to Jane as she scans it over; Lilly reading over her shoulder as I sadly gaze at the floor. I hate lying to them, but I've come to realize that sometimes lying is necessary in order to protect the ones you truly care about; the ones you love unconditionally.

Only Lilly, Jane and Ellie remain in that exclusive group now. I don't think I can let anybody else into that circle any longer. The more you care, the more you have to lose.

And I will not lose anybody else. Not as long as I have any say in the matter.

"Seems pretty legit to me," Jane comments, getting a nod from Lilly as she snatches the letter for herself. Seeing that I'm not going to hurt myself or anyone else, Jane drops her guard as I see her slide her knife back into place. Was she really ready to use that thing on me? "I think you know what you have to do, Clem. The kid deserves to know that much at least. Just sit down with her and explain things."

"…and what if she hates me for it?"

"That's the chance we've all gotta take sometimes," Lilly shrugs, probably knowing what it's like to have to do things that not everyone will be on board with. "It's all a part of growing up. Sometimes we've gotta do hard things for the people you care about – "

"Even if sometimes it means… hurting somebody else…" I recall what Lee once told me as Lilly nods in solemn agreement. "I… I can't do this alone anymore. I've tried but it… it's just not possible to do," I mention as I stare out at the horizon. "The people here don't trust me, my leadership skills are all out of whack, and now… this."

"That's why we're here – to help you every step of the way," Jane inputs as she studies my face for any sort of resistance. When I simply concede and nod my head, Lilly hands me the paper back as Jane decides what we should do. "Maybe we should divvy up the leadership duties for a while – it seems like a lot for one person to take on with how big this group is getting. Maybe all three of us should have a crack at it," she suggests, giving me a small sense of relief. As proud and incredibly mind-blowing as it was to finally start being treated more like an adult and less like a kid, perhaps I overstepped my boundaries a little bit. Maybe I've been growing up too fast, I don't really know.

But this seems like the best possible solution for now. I'm a little worried that the others might see this as some kind of a takeover plot, but the fact of the matter is that I'm not in a position to lead on my own anymore. I'm far too broken, and having all of that pressure to make the right choices has been weighing me down like a ton of bricks.

And clearly, that stress has finally gotten to me.

"We can keep all of this between us for now," Lilly states in a stern fashion, making her opinion known. "But you have to promise us that you'll cooperate, alright? If you need help, you come straight to us. No ifs, ands or buts. Do we have a deal?"

Pausing for just a brief moment, I silently nod my head as Lilly breathes out a sigh of relief.

"Good," she comments simply, giving me one, last worried glance as she turns back to her post. "We'll start tomorrow, then. You check in with one of us, you sit down and talk about what's going on in your life. You're not the only one who needs to vent."

"Lilly!"

Giving me a stern glance like a scolding mother, I bite my tongue before frowning slightly and taking off with Jane not too far behind me.

Fine – if that's what it takes for them to get off my case and keep the truth from spilling out all over the camp, then so be it. Who knows, maybe this'll be a good thing for me? Maybe it'll be a chance to really dig deep and find out what's going on, even though I'm almost certain that neither of them are qualified to do this kind of thing.

But maybe a couple of close friends is really all I need to cure this madness.

As my grip reaches the stair railing and I walk downwards, my mind wanders to Ellie and how that conversation's going to go over. I don't imagine that she's gonna be very happy with the news, nor the fact that I've been keeping this from her for two years now.

But like Jane and Lilly told me, she deserves to know the truth about her parent. Lucky for her that she doesn't actually have to see her mother dead like I had to.

Tommy's POV

With my backpack chock-full of supplies, a loaded pistol in my pocket, a hunting rifle strung across my back and a heavy heart pounding in my chest, I glance around at the colourless walls of this dark, dreary place. For some it might seem like a real home, but not for me. This isn't a home for me anymore – it's just four walls and a roof.

There is absolutely nothing comforting or satisfying about being here any longer, so I'm heading out once and for all. No goodbyes or anything – just me and the open road.

"Hold up."

God damn it. I really don't need this right now.

Turning around, I see Lilly of all people perched up on the upper balcony as I sigh and try to figure out what she could want. Isn't she supposed to be on watch right now or something?

"Bo tells me that you're planning on leaving the space centre," she comments dryly, looking rather worn out this afternoon for some reason. "Mind if I ask why?"

"You could, but I probably won't give you the answer you're looking for."

Frowning impatiently, Lilly crosses her legs as they dangle from her spot near the railing. She definitely means business now. "Fine then… can I at least mention that I think this is a stupid idea?"

"You could do that, too. Won't change anything," I shrug, really not feeling like having a discussion on this right now. My mind's been made up, and there's no changing it regardless of what people say.

I'm hitting the old, dusty trail, as the kids say.

"What do you have to gain by going out there?" she probes as I listen half-heartedly. I care about her, truly, but I need to think of the long-term effects of me staying here, and all the negative outcomes that could bring. "You've seen what it's like, Tommy – you've been out there before! It's nothing but a damn wasteland now!"

Holding my hands out to the side, I try to make light of the situation since there's nothing here that's really tying me down. The only fresh face that I may have had any kind of solid friendship with other than Lilly and her little posse would probably be Alden, but it'd probably be for the best if I just left regardless.

"It'll make for a better story then," I hyperbolize with a small, goofy grin. "Tommy, the Lone Wanderer – out in the world with nothing but the clothes on his back, a bag strung over his shoulders and a loaded gun. I think it's make for a pretty catchy read."

"Having some bullshit story told won't matter when you're dead!" she argues in a last-ditch attempt to sway my opinion. "So you're gonna throw your life away here, risk almost certain death out on your own and completely forget about the safest place you'll ever find… and you won't even tell me why?"

Knowing that Bo is no-doubt lurking around nearby, probably listening in on my every word, I clench my fist tightly before shaking my head in exasperation. It's not worth it anymore. Lilly's a pretty capable gal in her own right, and if worst comes to worst I'm sure that she, Jane and Clem would be more than a match for James and Bo. To be honest, a small part of me hopes that those two assholes bite the bullet sooner rather than later, but I keep these thoughts to myself.

For now, I see that I at least owe her a little bit of an explanation as to where I plan on heading towards. If they ever plan on looking me up, then it'd be helpful to get an idea of where to look… well, if I'm actually still there at least.

"I plan on heading out to Jackson County – Wyoming," I clarify, realizing that there may be more than one of those places. "They had it pointed out on one of them maps, and it seems like my best shot. It's got a damn and everything."

"You don't know that for sure. It could be overrun for all you know."

"The place is real, Lilly. I know it is," I insist, feeling a little antsy since nobody's actually questioned my plan up until now. "Do you know how much we could achieve with a working dam? A dam means electricity, which means power, which means I could actually start something there. That generator is toast – I checked, and there's no propane left in this one-horse town."

"Your place is here, Tommy. Not out in the world where you might get nabbed by a walker or something worse," she continues, showing off her stubborn side as I see just how much she cares. "We need you just as much as you need us."

As hard as she tries, Lilly can't and won't be able to budge me. This won't be so bad – I've dealt with worse things than simply being out alone in the world, and I believe that the trade-off will be completely worth it. I could really turn over a new leaf, start over and really make a difference in the world. I can't be a part of something that just tears lives and families apart. I won't do that anymore.

"Make sure you keep track of who it is you trust around here. Make sure you know just who it is that you're dealing with. And Lilly…" I trail off, looking into her brown orbs once more as I get ready to leave this place for good, "…take care of yourself. I mean it – you keep Jane, Clem and Ellie safe."

"Yeah… you too, I guess…" she murmurs reluctantly as I tear my gaze away from her. Who would've thought that it'd actually be difficult for me to say goodbye to her? I certainly hadn't expected it, and it makes me even less inclined to turn back around and say goodbye to the rest of them. I'm afraid that I'll make a huge mistake if I do.

This is the right choice here, I know it is. Sometimes circumstances don't work out the way you'd planned them to; sometimes shit happens that you can't control. When that happens, you have either two options – either try and fix the issue yourself, or turn and walk away while leaving your troubles in the past. Certain things tend to sort themselves out, and I have no doubt that James and Bo will get what's coming to them in time.

If there is actually a god somewhere watching over all of us, then it just has to happen.

Pulling out my picture of Sarah and Joel one last time, I smile sadly as I feel the open air whip against my face. Y'all would've been proud of old Uncle Tommy, that's for damn sure.

No going back – time to start a new chapter of my life.