So this is it, my new home, a single-family two-story building, the owner tried to sell for over a year. I think it once was a mint color, like a 1959 Cadillac Coupe de Ville in Danbury Mint, but now the paint is cracked and large spots of the wood beneath is showing. Several floor boards on the porch are missing and the roof has a couple of leaks, but at least the windows are alright, well, at least the windows I can see. On one side, the house is overgrown with ivy, so I will have to free at least the windows. Obviously, the renovation of the house will be plenty of work.

I go through the front yard and I'm certain, that it is here, where I have to start with the renovation. The lawn needs to be mown and tended to and I would like to plant some rosebushes for a little color here and there, but otherwise, it's a beautiful patch. There's a fence around the property, which is good when you have children. It should be painted tough.

I open my solid, wooden, timeworn door, which looks like it has survived the Civil War or at least the thousands of knocks from Jehovah's Witnesses. There is a creaking sound and I inwardly prepare myself for Jason Voorhees, attacking me with a machete in his hands, but nothing happens. Nevertheless I wait a few moments and take a deep breath before I take a closer look at my new house. It's very small in here in comparison to our previous home, but it will do. It's obvious because of the sparse decoration, that there was no woman involved; Everything appears kind of sterile, but I think I can make a home out of it. There are no colors, neither on the walls nor on the furniture. Well, the furniture, which is here. Maybe some of the 300 Spartans lived here before, because there is not much furniture.

On the ground floor there are three rooms – the hall, the living room and the kitchen. The hall has enough space to accommodate like three laboratory mice. If there would be no window, I would have problems breathing in here. The living room feels a bit more comfortable, like the center of the home, which it should be. There is a large, open fireplace and a shabby couch in the center of the room. It looks like 10 cats gave birth to their kittens on it, so I really need to replace it. There even is an old piano. I can't play it, but if it's working, I'll keep it. Maybe some day, one of my boys wants to learn how to play. The kitchen is beautiful though, there is a large window behind the sink and a decent amount of cabinets and drawers. The white color bothers me, but I think I will paint the walls. In the living room, there is another door which leads to the back yard, that I explore next. Oh crap! The back yard is a huge problem. I think it was used as an illegal waste dump by the last owner. There are indescribable things lying around everywhere, many wooden pallets, tires of all sizes and so on. This will be a lot of work, hard work, but hey, at least it was cheap.

Upstairs on the upper floor, there are two bedrooms and a bathroom. The white walls and white furniture concept is visible on this level as well. The bathroom has a bathtub, for which I'm grateful, although it's very cozy in here. My bedroom has a queen-sized bed, which is good because Andy sleeps at least a few hours in my bed every now and then since his father died and Tommy sometimes sleeps here, too. There is also a little walk-in closet. The other bedroom is completely empty, so I'll get new furniture for the boys. IKEA, here I come.

I'm so happy that there is no rent to pay and that there is at least one grandparent around to watch after my kids. If only I could get a job as well, I really might be happy again. Maybe. My father-in-law got me a part-time job at Clayton's, a hardware store here in Montesano. It sure is not enough money to make a proper living, but it covers the bare essentials. I applied for several publishing houses though and hope to get a full time job there. Tommy starts school soon and Andy will be in daycare, so at least the kids are cared for.

One week later, I move in. José, my good friend, has a big van and so he sacrificed his time to move my boxes filled with my life. Is it sad, that my whole life fits in one van? All I ever achieved fits in a few boxes and one simple van. In the meantime, I have bought the new furniture and put it together with Ray's help. Today, José will arrive, so Kate, Ethan and his fiancé Hannah are helping me to unload while Ray is watching the children. When the queen of clumsiness moves, you can be sure that some things will get broken. So after a day of carrying boxes, I have to say goodbye to a big vase, an old clock from my grandfather and some toy cars, which the boys left in my way and I stepped on. For a whole day it's not that much that got broken, I think, so I'm pleased because it could be much worse. In the evening I start to cook dinner and thereafter we are all sitting at the table. I made my famous lasagna and Kate brought some red wine. I thank all my friends and my father-in-law for their help. I'm so happy that I have them. Moving all by myself with two little children would have been impossible or at least far too expensive.

At night, my boys are asleep and I'm alone again. I sit at my laptop and read the newest celebrity gossip like I always do to keep my mind occupied. There I see an article about Christian Grey and his fiancé. Her name is Elena Lincoln. I hope for her that in private, he is more understanding and likeable than in business. I take a closer look at the picture of him. He has cold eyes. I wonder, what happened to him that makes him so cold. What I learnt in my 24 years is, that everyone has a story and a reason why he is as he is. I sigh.

The next day, I'm in the back yard to take a look around and to plan the best approach to revive it. I sigh frustrated, not even knowing where to begin. After a few minutes I hear loud noises. I go to the front door and stop dead in my tracks. I see a middle aged woman in my front yard, covered with toilet paper. Oh no! Please don't say that was the work of my boys. That sure will mean trouble.
"You look like the morning after Halloween. You probably had a day like I did, what happened to you?" I ask her, trying to ease the situation.
"Monday is his first day of school …" she says pointing her finger at Tommy, who is now standing behind me, along with Andy, trying to hide in shame. "... and I came here to welcome your family! And what do I get in return? I get toilet-papered by your children! They were about to douse the toilet paper in gasoline and strike…" she screams hysterically. Fuck. That's fucking insane.
"Wait. Stop. They're going through this arson period. They don't know this, but I'm way ahead of them. I got two fire extinguishers ready to go, Mrs. … Sorry, I didn't get your name?"
"Adele Burbridge, principal of the Montesano School. Your children are monsters!" she spits and grimaces in disgust.
"Oh you won't think that once you get to know them", I try to defend them.
"Where is Mr. Steele while all of this is going on?" she says like she's trying to understand me.
"He died seven months ago", I answer in a sad voice.
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, but Mrs. Steele, your children are totally lacking in parental supervision!" she says in a know-it-all manner.
"Hey, you don't have to tell me these kids are lucky", I say in defense.
"Fine, you can joke around about it all you want, but if you don't do something, I will notify the proper authorities." She seems to be fed up.
"Hey, I've had babysitters in here by the dozen, I'm low on cash, I'm new in town, but if I have the chance, I'll hire a housekeeper!" I say desperately.
"I'll believe it when I see it, good day, Mrs. Steele!" she snorts, turns around and disappears.
Great, just great. As if I don't have enough problems already, now I just got one more. I shake my head and go into my house.

After a few weeks it's obvious, that moving to such a small town is a drastic change of our lifestyle. It's now clear, that Tommy has indeed problems to adjust. I frequently get phone calls and messages from his school. He fights, is lacking in concentration and his grades could be better. That worries me. It's just his first year and there are already so many problems.

In the meantime, I got a job at a little publishing house and on Saturdays I'm still working at Claytons. But when I'm not at work, I can't help myself but stick around at home most of the time, with a good book in my hands, curled up on the couch. Kate doesn't approve of my lifestyle. "Ana Piranha, you totally need to go out and find yourself a boyfriend!" she says demanding.
"I have a boyfriend who does exactly what I like and knows how to turn me on … he may need batteries, but he's mine, so don't judge", I say defensively, pointing a finger at her.
"It's ok to have one, I also have a selection, but it doesn't replace a human being", she replies.
"You can have your friends with benefits. I have friends with batteries and a lot less drama", I say and we both giggle.
Kate's face turns serious. "Don't you miss that special one by your side?"
I sigh. "I'm not desperate for a relationship, but: I do miss the feeling of having someone that can make me smile and feel appreciated. Someone that will make calling and texting me the first and last thing he does everyday. Someone who will be there to hold me when I feel vulnerable. Someone who will look past my flaws and who loves me for who I am. Someone who will cause butterflies in my stomach every time we're together. Someone who I can call mine."
"Aaaaaawwww. Ana, I'm 100% sure, you'll get this someone. Soon!" she reassures me, hugging me affectionately.

I totally miss my husband and I'm not sure, if I am able move on already. In the end it was not that we got separated because of fighting all the time, but he was taken away from me, so I still love him so much. At least, there are more and more evenings without crying. Time indeed will heal all wounds. Time and occupation, like renovating and personalizing my home.

So far I have been able to renew my front yard and I have to say, I'm pretty satisfied with the result. I planted a dozen of rosebushes in all colors. My lawn is totally cultivated and I'm quite proud of it, because it's the prettiest lawn on the whole street, even prettier than Ray's. At my housewarming party, I got some presents for my front yard, which made me laugh. Ray gave me a cute mailbox in the form of a little free library. On one side there is the mail slot and on the other side there's a little shelve, where I can store books, which are not needed anymore, so others can take them or exchange them with books, they sorted out. I absolutely love it. José gave me a birdhouse made of old books. Kate decided to help me with decorating my house by giving me a rug. Needless to say, it is made of old spines of books. I have really hilarious friends. And I really should change my hobby into something with diamonds, or gold.

I placed Kate's rug in the living room and I have to say that it really tied the room together. But this is not the only change I made inside my house. I managed to turn it into a beautiful, warm home. There are way more colors in every room and there are a couple of great DIY and reuse ideas implemented, for example a rack recycled from an old chair for my bathroom, an old ladder converted into a bookshelf for my living room and an old suitcase, which is now my mirror bathroom cabinet with a mirror on the outside and shelves on the inside. All in all I almost feel at home here. The only problem left is the back yard. I have to admit, I'm a bit hopeless about that, but fortunately nobody can see into my back yard. Somehow I'll manage this albatross around the neck, too. I can't put it off for too long, though, because eventually the kids will bring friends over, so they shouldn't have to be embarrassed by my back yard.

As you see, updates will usually happen once a week on Sunday.

sweetsub75, hettyblue, meigs37, julie - Thanks for your reviews!

Westie80 - I fear that Ana taking revenge will be nonetheless much friendlier than Christian. But we will see.

Christian618 - I think Ana and her kids are going to make sure that Christian will warm up a bit.

ashley . mercer . 16 - Oh how I love your reviews. The whole story will be Ana's POV, but keep your reviews coming and in the end you may chose one chapter which I write in Christian's POV ;)

Pielietje - I hope, this chapter is enough luck for her - a new job, a beautiful house (by now) and a grandparent near by. Maybe she'll find love next ;)

Grey Steele fan - I think Christian tries to save as much jobs as he can, but sometimes you have to sign people off (e.g. when the previous owner hired more people than he needed or could afford). Eventually, something had to happen, so that the story gains momentum. So I hope you will like Christian soon ;)

eminshall07 - I think, Christian will (have to) make it up soon ;)

emi17 - How about I let some Christian fall her way? ;D