Chapter 3:
I decide against going to school the next day, a Friday, just to give myself some time to heal so that I'm not wincing every step I take. My brother helped me last night, cleaning my wounds then my bedroom, at the expense that he was going to stay home today also, and have a serious talk with me. I'm currently snuggled up in bed, blankets up to my chin, when I hear a soft knock at the door.
"Beatrice I'm coming in." Caleb says while I watch the knob slowly turn, pushing the door into my bedroom.
I stay cuddled in the corner facing towards Caleb, but I don't say a word, acting as if I don't acknowledge him. He walks across my room, sitting at the foot of my bed, placing his hand on my legs, that are covered with blankets. Sometimes Caleb reminds me of my father, he acts like him when he used to not work 24/7, but now that my father and mother are working night and day, my brother has taken the role of being my guardian.
"I want you to tell me what happened. Why did you throw that picture of Tobias and you at the wall?" He asks keeping his eyes on me, but I refuse to talk, not wanting to spill all my secrets. "Beatrice, please...I want to help you. I know him leaving was hard but its been three years, if you were really that mad, you would have done that the day he left."
I can feel the pain and sorrow from his words hit me like a ton of bricks. It has been three years. Tobias is almost eighteen, and he hasn't called me once, or tried to get on a plane and see me, but now he has no clue where I live.
The first few months after he left, I called him non stop, but he would never answer, his voice mail the last little piece of his deep voice I had left. After a while I stopped calling, my mind had finally wrapped around the realization that he was never going to pick up or call back.
"Please don't talk about him." I mumble, my voice weak from thinking about the past years.
"Beatrice, to help you, I need to know." He speaks gently while his hand continues to rub my legs.
"Caleb, I miss him." My mouth blabs before my mind decides whether or not it would be a good idea to say.
"I know you do. I know you two were close, and it's hard to lose someone like that, but if you miss him then why did you throw the picture at the wall?"
I take a deep breath, knowing he will keep asking unless I tell him something, and that something will have to be the truth. "I'm mad at him."
"Why?" Caleb questions me, his eyes thoughtful.
"Because he's the reason why my life went from heaven to hell." I speak, closing my eyes tightly, refusing to open them as the memories of my old friends bullying me flow back.
"By moving? Beatrice he had no control over that." Caleb says, and I know he's right, but he doesn't get my point.
"He kissed me." I sigh, the words streaming out of my mouth fast before I regret them.
"What?" Caleb asks clearly confused, and I open my eyes again. "When did he kiss you?"
"The night he left, he told me he loved me, kissed me, then walked out of my life." I speak, my voice a little shaky from having to say it outloud.
"So you're mad at him for that? I still don't understand why you would wait three year to act on those emotions."
"Because of him, I can't make friends anymore. I don't trust anyone, Caleb. They will all just leave me like he did." I explain, my heart kicking up speed as realization crosses Caleb's face.
For once in my life, Caleb is out of questions, out of words to say, and all I can do is stay lying down and stare at him. He looks at me then at the picture that used to be in a frame but is now just sitting on my dresser.
"My friends, the ones that I shared with Tobias, dropped me after he left. They began to bully me, and got a few others to help them. They spilled all the secrets I told them when we were friends. I couldn't do it anymore, and I can't now either."
"Have you tried calling him recently?" My eyes that had traveled down to his hand rubbing my leg, shoot up to his face.
"No...he would never answer." I say stunned at the idea. Caleb nods his head up and down slowly.
"That could be true, but if you ever really loved him, isn't it worth a shot?" He raises an eyebrow while he plucks my phone off my nightstand.
I fold the sheets over so my arms are mobile, and hold out my hands while Caleb sets the IPhone in them.
"Go ahead and call Beatrice. You did change your number after all." Says Caleb, standing from my bed and walking out my room, glancing back once as he shut the door.
My eyes wander to the phone lying in my hand, and it only takes a few seconds to unlock it. School ended here an hour ago, so if he is anywhere near my timezone, he has to be out too. I quickly click on my favorites list, and see the names scrawled across the screen. Caleb, Mom, Dad, and finally Tobias. I couldn't let him go, or delete his number, so as I changed my phone-and phone number-the only numbers I kept were those four's.
I can feel sweat on my forehead begin to build up as my thumb lies above Tobias's name, hesitating to press down. I close my eyes tight as I press his name, slowly bringing my phone up against my ear.
My heart is pounding so hard and fast that I'm scared it will burst, and I know the hope, alive in my being may soon be crushed. I gently push the covers off me swinging my legs to hang over the edge of the bed, listening while it rings once, twice, then three times.
Midway through the fourth ring, I hear a click and then it stops ringing.
"Hello?"
The voice wakes something inside me, my body going numb, my heart racing, my mouth unable to come up with words. No doubt in my mind that that is Tobias's voice in the other end, and all I can do is take a sharp intake of air at how much deeper it sounds, and how much I didn't know I longed for it.
"Hello?" Tobias says again, the wonderful sound of his voice in my ear. "Is anyone there?" another silence as I can't form words. "I can hear you breathing."
"I-" is all I'm able to squeak out before I can't move. I'm paralyzed, my body refusing to move, the shock of his voice overwhelming.
"Call me back, unless you have the wrong number, I'm a little busy at the moment." He says, trying to stay polite, but clear impatiens coming through in his voice. "Bye."
With that the phone goes dead, my mind as well, my body just as stuck. Nothing else in this world did I want more then to have one more conversation with Tobias, and I just had the opportunity, letting it slip from my fingers. I can't talk to anyone or see anyone, because I'm scared that if they asked me if I'm okay, I wont be able to hold back the cries. Instead of getting up and telling my brother, I lie back down, my head resting on my pillows, and my arms to in surprise to move the covers back over me.
My brother doesn't bother me the rest of the night, and no matter how hard I try my eyes won't shut, and my body won't allow me to fall to sleep. All I know is that this is going to be a restless weekend.
By third period, English, on Monday, Christina has already approached me about coming to sit next to her and her friends. At first I was nervous she was going to say something about the big scar on my forehead, although I attempted to cover it with makeup, but Christina never brings it up. I agreed to go to lunch with her, even in my emotional state, I can't deny someone of something they want, if I can help them. She just seemed so desperate to get me to sit with her, and I know she's the one trying to help me.
When I get to the lunch room, nobody but a few kids sit at the tables, most students busy getting lunch in the lunch line that I refuse to wait in. I sit at the table I sat at last time, same chair, and lie my head down, blocking out the commotion.
"Tris." Sighs Christina as she sits next to me. "I would be happy to see you eating lunch with us, but you're not actually eating. Where is your lunch?"
I laugh a little at the sweet tone in her voice, "I'm not hungry."
"Oh so you've decided to be more talkative today?" She asks opening the container of salad she holds, dropping the subject of my lack of food.
"I never said that."
Uriah, Marlene, and Will soon join us, filling in the empty seats surrounding Christina and I.
"Hey, Tris. Nice to see you back." Uriah kindly greats me, smiling as he slides his arm around Marlene. I nod in response and acknowledgement. "Are you going to the game tonight?"
"What game?" My voice comes out weaker than anticipated.
"The football game. Uriah's on the team with his brother." Marlene inputs, smiling at her boyfriend.
"I guess I can go," I say softly, "but I don't have anyone to go with."
"Don't worry, you can go with Marlene, Will, and I." Christina offers, bouncing in her seat at the idea.
"I dont know if thats such a good idea, I mean, I'm not the best company."
"Don't be silly, Tris." She laughs. "I'm the one offering, aren't I?"
"I guess." I mumble agreeing.
"Fantastic, I expect you to be ready by five, if we want to get good seats." She practically squeals, jumping for joy just as the bell signalling lunch is over rings. I quickly move away from them after handing Christina my address, guaranteeing I will be ready by five.
It's almost five and I have just finished getting ready, making sure that my shorter sleeves are still long enough to cover to new scars I added on the inside of my forearm, not from the glass. I know I shouldn't have, as I had been 'clean' from cutting for sixth months, but I just couldn't help it, with Tobias's call hanging over my head.
I do some final touches on my make up and hair before I saunter down the stairs, not really wanting to go to the game anymore. I stand by the door folding the picture of Tobias and I, into my pocket for good luck. Since I have never done it before, and I always have bad luck, shouldn't I at least try to see if it will bring me good luck?
I only stand there for a few more minutes before my door bell chimes and I'm pulling the door open to be meet with Christina, smiling as she sees me.
"Thought I would never see you without a sweatshirt, glad to see a change." She smiles at me, then turning around and heading for the big black truck parked in my driveway.
I hesitate walking outside, my legs stuck, but eventually I make it, locking my front door behind me with a key. I walk to the truck and stuff myself in the back with Marlene, while Christina goes to sit in the front, with Will driving.
"So I never had the chance to ask you why you didn't come to school on Friday…" Christina asks as Will backs out of my driveway, heading towards our school.
"I wasn't feeling well." I lie, biting my lip to keep from spilling the truth.
"Oh well," says Marlene, "just a heads up, our teams quarterback is H-O-T!" Marlene squeals beside me, latching on to my arm.
"Don't you have a boyfriend?" I ask confused by her sudden excitement.
"Ya Marlene," Will says, a hint of a smirk on his face, "I wonder what Uri would say."
"He already knows. The whole school is basically crushing on him." She laughs not caring one bit. An unexpected smile appears in my lips, a small chuckle bursting through them, catching Christina and Marlene off guard.
"Did Tris just laugh, Chris? Did she actually show an emotion other than, pissed-off-id-ness." Marlene giggles, making up words to describe my natural emotions.
"She did. Welp, I guess we are going in the right direction." Christina says just as Will pulls the truck into a parking space closest to the field.
We hop out of the truck and make our way to the schools 'stadium', paying the fee to get in. We make our way to the middle rows, far enough up to see at a good angle, and close enough to see anything at all.
The players are out on the field already, warming up their arms, throwing the ball to each other. I look around for anyone I recognize, but seem to come up with nothing.
"Looking for Mr. Quarterback?" Christina questions in my ear, laughing.
"No, I'm looking for anyone I recognize." I reply truthfully.
"Uriah's number nine, and his brother, Zeke, is number ten. Zeke is warming up with our cute quarterback, number four." She explains, pointing in the general area of everyone.
After another half hour, students from our school and from the opposing team begin to pile in, filling the empty seats around us. The game only begins soon after and we begin in offence. Throughout the whole game I sit silently, observing the players and their handle towards defensemen and offence men. Many are different and amusing, slightly moving to one side to protect the other side from collision.
I know football games were not made so you can see a person's reaction to someone coming to tackle them, but it's what I find myself searching for each and every time. By the fourth quarter, it's pretty obvious we are going to win. Currently the score is 24 to 34, us, and once again we have the ball, third and goal on six yard line.
The quarterback starts the play, and the players sprint around the field, most in the end zone. The quarterback frantically searches for someone open before he gets sacked, but no one is left without a defensemen right on their fronts. In a desperate attempt to make one more touchdown, the quarterback sprints to the end zone, his clearly muscular, six foot something body just barely making it as someone tackles him.
The refs call it a touchdown, and with that the students in the stand rush into the field congratulating the players on a fantastic game. I follow close behind Christina as she rushes herself, beating Will and Marlene to meet Uriah.
"Amazing touchdown second quarter Uri!" She shouts over the hollering while Will and Marlene finally arrive.
"Thank you." He says, bowing while laughing as Marlene comes to him, smacking her lips right to his.
"You did fantastic babe." She says when they pull away, and he just grins widely at her.
"So I thought it'd be about time you meet my brother and his friend Tris." Uriah says smiling, and all I can think about is how i've only known him for such a short time but I already feel like I'm beginning to fit in.
Uriah points behind him as two tall males walk up, both with helmets still on. The shorter one, probably 6'2 maybe, slips his helmet off, showing his resemblance to Uriah.
"This is my twin brother Zeke." Uriah introduces, nodding his head while Zeke reaches out a hand for me to shake, and I do. I then look over to the other guy, who has not even looked to us, he's still talking to another guy from the team. My curiosity takes place when I notice the four on his jersey, telling me he was the cute guy everyone's been telling me about.
"Four, budy, pay attention." Zeke says, placing both his hands on the guys shoulders, turning him towards him. "We are introducing you to people."
The guy laughs, deep and mesmerizing laugh, while he takes his helmet off. As soon the 'mask' is off his face, my eyes lock with his, and my body freezes.
"Tobias."
So tell me what you think of this chapter please. Fourtris soon (maybe) if you review (for sure). Please review!
~divergent24-7