I wake up and another hangover greets me, so I groan as I try to open my eyes to this much too bright light. But it's not just the hangover, that gives me a major headache. I also feel familiar emotions - anxiousness and nervousness - because today, I'm going to tell Christian the truth, I'm just waiting for the right moment. It feels like in Mary Poppins, when there is a change in the wind. It reminds me of last week, when Christian entered our lives. Turning around I see Christian lying next to me. He's still asleep and oblivious to any aspects of his former life. Panic spreads in me. I'm absolutely not ready to let him go. Not after last night, not at all. Shit, I really love this guy. I'm in love with him.
I stare at his face and try to save this image forever in my brain. I stroke his hair and kiss his lips. He stirs and wakes up while I cover him with kisses. I'm sure, he senses my urge to be near him, because in no time we're naked and making love to each other without another word spoken. I want him to take away my uneasy feeling and it works, at least for now.
After I finally stand up I wrap myself in a robe and shoo Christian into the bathroom. We're taking a really hot shower and I enjoy our little bubble. I wrap myself around him and hold him in my arms, unable to shake off that uneasy feeling, but savoring every minute in his arms. After the shower, we head into the bedroom and put on some casual clothes. Half way through, our kids storm into our room and bustle around. I try to calm them down and announce, that today I want to eat a different breakfast.
We decide to pack some sandwiches and do a picnic in the park. There is a little lake in the middle with an asphalt path going around. There are lots of trees and benches. Almost everywhere around the park there are ducks and swans. Tommy insists, that he takes his new bike and Andy takes his learner bike. So we head to the park. I spread out the blanket and Christian and I curl up, while the boys take a nice lap around the lake. I can't help but cling onto Christian enjoying his presence as long as possible. I decide to tell him the ugly truth when we're at home. Here in the park there is all peace and quiet and a perfect point to remember the good times with Christian, before the shit will hit the fan. So I look for his proximity - a kiss here, a hug there, countless touches everywhere. We're like teenagers. Every now and then, we have to cheer the boys on, when they pass us. After some laps, we all dig in and enjoy our picnic. Then, Christian plays football with the children, while I read my book. It's so much fun to see him interact with the kids. Oh how I would love to have him around for the rest of my life. That thought makes my uneasy feeling come back in full force and I stiffen. After this little work out, we go home. Time for the truth, I guess.
On our way home, I see a black SUV in front of my house. As we approach the house, the blonde goddess, his fiancé, leaves the car, followed by the man in black. Fuck. Now I know who the man was, that I saw at the café in Portland. I feel sick to my stomach and my knees are feeling like jelly. My palms are beginning to sweat, my vision goes blurry and suddenly everything feels like it's in slow motion. I feel the tears welling up and threatening to fall and in just a couple of seconds, the last two weeks pass in my mind's eye and I really, really get scared of the situation ahead of me. He'll be sooo angry with me and with his fiancé nearby, there won't be a chance to explain myself. ‚That serves you right!' I think to myself. ‚You had twelve days to tell him the truth, you are so pathetic!' How could I hurt him so much? I'm such a terrible person and in a few moments my heart will be shattered in a million pieces. Oh boy, looks like the dream is about to end.
Christian makes his way to the front door. Casually, like nothing ever happened, he greets this blonde goddess and makes his way inside the house. I go very slowly, taking deep breaths to calm my nerves and take the hands of my boys, after they cleared away their bikes in a little shed next to the house. The blonde woman glares at me and hisses through gritted teeth:
"Don't you do something stupid. You will regret it!"
I bend down to my kids. "Hey guys, it's important to listen to mommy! Christian has to leave now. He might be a little off now, but he does love you, remember that."
"No, mommy, I don't want him to go. He said, he won't leave!" Tommy cries and I'm feeling so helpless. Andy fidgets and pulls my hand: "No! Daddy must stay!" he whines. With tears in my eyes I kiss their foreheads and hug them tight. They will never leave me. They will never hate me. They are all that I have now.
The front door opens slowly and Christian comes out. "Elena?" The blonde makes her way to Christian and opens her arms. "Christian, darling, I finally found you! How are you?" she coos and kisses him on his lips.
"Elena, oh my god, I'm fine, I'm so fine, I finally remember all. I'm Christian Grey, owner of Grey Enterprises Holdings, I have a brother and a sister and you are my fiancé. I have money, so much money, even in Switzerland!" he exclaims excitedly.
„In Switzerland?" she asks interestedly.
"I also have a jet, helicopter, boat and a lot of really exciting cars. Oh Elena, the doctors said it would all come back and now it does!" he says happily.
Spinning around he makes his way towards me and I prepare myself for the last blast. I shift from foot to foot nervously and manage to bring up a weak smile. Embracing me in a tight hug he says:
"Ana, cupcake, I'm so fucking glad this nightmare is over finally. I thank you so much for being so patient with me and helping me through all of this and …"
Suddenly his whole body tenses. I close my eyes, tears start to fall from my eyes. This is it. The End. He's going away and lets me down. He lays his hands on my shoulders and extends his arms, pushing me away a bit.
"… why? Why did you do this? You are the employee I fired. You are not my wife …"
His face shows a hundred emotions. Shock, anger, sadness, disbelieve, all in once. He turns his head to my side and takes a step back.
"… and these are not my children. You made me believe they where ours!"
I can't take it anymore. I close my eyes and raise my hand to my mouth, avoiding the sobs.
"What have I done to you that you fucking hate me so much? Revenge is a dish best served cold, I guess."
I can't look at him, my mind blanks without any answer. He takes another few steps back, shaking his head.
„I'll just go into the house and pack my things."
He turns and disappears into the house. I take the hands of my boys and squeeze them.
"Everything will be alright, believe me!" I mutter and try to smile.
After a few moments he steps out of the house, just the trophy, Tommy made him, and the cook book in his hands and says:
„Nothing else in there belongs to me." He makes his way to the SUV and doesn't say anything else. As he opens the door, I shriek:
"Christian!"
He stills and looks at me. He has a hurt facial expression, like these injured and neglected animals on the advertisings for the animal shelters.
I proceed: "For whatever it's worth, thank you!"
He nods and gets into the car. The blonde woman says:
"Come on, dear. We'll get you out of these rags", gets into the vehicle after him and the man in the black suit closes the door. He nods shortly in my direction, enters the car and drives away.
After a couple of meters, the boys start to run after the SUV. Tommy screams:
"Daddy! Daddy! Don't go away! You said you won't leave!" and begins to cry. Even my little one tries to follow the car as fast as he can. My knees are getting weak and I finally give up. I sink to the ground and bury my face in my hands. I let it all out and cry as if there is no tomorrow. I did not only hurt Christian, but also my two children. I'm a monster. All this happened just because of a fucking job. Oh how I do regret this whole journey. My boys come back to me and Tommy asks me:
"Are we alone again?"
"Yes, Tommy, we are alone again. You, Andy and me against the world!" I say, making a fist bump in his direction.
"Mommy, we manage it! I'll help you", he says and fist bumps mine.
"Thank you, my dear, without you I couldn't do it!"
And with that being said, I hug him, not knowing, what the future will bring.
The End.
This is it. The End. I want to thank each and everyone of you spending your precious time on reading my story!
Furthermore I want to thank especially GinnyGinervaWeasley, my husband, b . aka-chan xD and ashley . mercer . 16 for beta reading my story. You're awesome guys!
I also want to thank ashley . mercer . 16, Christian618 and Pielietje for reviewing every. single. chapter. As a thank you gift, you three each may choose a chapter of this story and I try to write it in CPOV (as 3 bonus chapters). So write me a PM please ;)
The movie quotes from the last chapter: The fact, that Ana had nothing betwixt her nethers, that don't run on batteries for a long time was a quote from "Serenity" and Ana's "Oh Jesus! Oh God! Oh Jesus! Mary mother Jesus of Nazareth"-panting was a quote from the Movie "Bean".
Guest (May 18), ashley . mercer . 16, Pielietje, Goodlyfe, sweetsub75 - Thanks for your review! My husband is now afraid, that he must write every future sex scene for me ;D.
Christian618 - We'll never find out if there was a baby or not - at least not now, sorry ;).
Andristasia Grey-Darcy - It's better than a HEA, it's an open end. You can now imagine what YOU want to happen. ;)
sillie J - Oh my god, I'm sooooo sorry! And YYAAAAYY, you found my quote. I just love Kaylee so much, it's my favorite character of Firefly! If there will be a sequel depends how you all like my ending ;)
Guest (May 19) - Well, I'm glad you have fun with your boyfriend! ;)
PS: In case, you don't like my end:
I wanted to write an epilogue to stick with the movie for a HEA, BUT: it went OVERBOARD. What a wordplay ;D. Until now, I wrote 20k words and I'm not finished yet. So be sure to (keep) follow(ing) my story, because there will be an 'alternative ending for HEA-junkies'. It will begin with CPOV, when he drives away and end with a real HEA. Furthermore, it will have both Ana's and Christians POV this time.
NOW you have the chance to tell me (1) which questions you want to be answered and (2) what you want to see happen. If it fits, I'll integrate it in my story! So review or PM me!
I hope, we'll see us soon, until then: LATERS, BABIES ;D