Between a general feeling of poorliness, helping my mother redo her bathroom, and still trying to get work and words done, the days are going by too fast and before I know it, I'm behind in everything with no energy left to do... anything. (In between changing her mind with paint colours, my mother is also informing me that my diet has been abysmal and that explains everything. "You need to eat more than tea and toast." "But why?!")

Anyway. I don't even know at this point if I'm late posting this (what day is it?) but here we go! Any guesses what happens this chapter?

Onward!

xxiii

"I will still get you a diamond," he promised her. She should have something beautiful adorning her finger. Just as he hoped she would insist they find him a ring of his own—something that would show the world that someone had claimed him as husband, even as he wished to show that she was well cared for. Well loved.

She would be making enough sacrifices to be his bride; he would not add to her disappointments unnecessarily.

"When will we have the wedding?"

She was still happily nestled against his chest, and a peace settled there to have her so close. He had spoken his truths and been rewarded for them. She had said she valued honesty, but he had not fully believed her. Not until now.

Should he then voice the limitations on certain legalities?

Yes.

For the first time his conscience was quiet as he held her. There was no niggling voice that prodded him with the knowledge that if she knew, she would flee from him. Except she had not. And she would not. Not if he could be truthful.

"I do not have records of my birth. Or my residency. Not any that were not purchased by myself."

Christine pulled away slightly. "Oh. I guess... I guess I don't really either. Not here." She gave him a knowing look, and he wondered if she would someday chastise him more thoroughly for his initial actions with her. "I was told to leave them at my apartment."

Erik shifted, not wanting to spoil things, but knowing that she deserved full enlightenment. "You have new ones, just as you would have in more... traditional witness security. Would... would that suffice?"

He had procured a great many papers before departing with her, preparing for any eventuality. Not all stated they were married. A few sets of documents even suggested they were siblings, though even in the very beginning, he had frowned deeply at that particular set.

Christine had asked him once why he had chosen the west coast. He had given no answer, for he did not think her prepared for the explanation. He had selected them both, for amongst his documentation sat marriage licenses, both completely filled, some not.

He had not requested them from his supplier.

In reality, he rather thought the man had been mocking him.

But when Erik had discovered them, he had been... intrigued. It was doubtful that he would ever be able to secure one from any official channels, not with his history and lack of birth record. But at least with these, he could pretend.

Christine was not quite looking at him, her brow furrowed and thoughtful. "Could we... could we still get married in a church?"

Erik wanted to flinch. To pull away and tell her that he had no place there. But... he was Christine's now. And she said that she had attended services at home, so likely she would decide to do so again in future.

Did he wish to set the precedence that he was unwilling to attend with her?

A part of him gave another emphatic yes, but the other...

Christine was his reason to hope. That things could be different, that he could be different. Better. That maybe, after all this time, God had heard his pain, his anguish, had given him the blessing of this precious girl…

And he would not begin their new life together by disappointing her.

"We may."

He did not know how, or the exact location, but he would try. For her.

And her answering grin made the promise well worth it.

She insisted they beginning planning immediately. Her cheeks had pinked and she had grown shy, still not quite looking at him. "I miss you being close when I go to sleep."

As if she even properly remembered what it was like when they so briefly shared a bed. She had slept so soundly, and he had left before her waking, it likely had been as if he had not been there at all.

But that did not stop the shiver that went through him to know that she evidently, at the very least, had an expectation that they would be sharing a bed after their wedding.

It was a great deal more than he had ever hoped for.

She had asked him to bring his laptop into the living room, and together they scrolled through chapels within the area which might prove sufficient for their nuptials.

Evidently this town was not lacking in churches.

For the most part, he simply rejected the ones with buildings too hideous for words, leaving Christine to select the denomination and potential officiant therein.

Until Christine gave him a proud smile, turning the screen so he could see it properly. "I like this one."

It was a small white chapel, a cheery bell nestled in a tower, the interior all creamy moldings and dark pews. An idyllic little place.

That he most assuredly could see marrying his Christine in.

"I will secure it in the morning." And he would. If Christine was ready, then he was too. Except... "Would you not prefer to wait so you could find a gown?"

She deflated somewhat at that, and he wished he had not spoken, yet she answered him before he could retract the enquiry. "Did you... did you always dream about that? Your bride in a white dress, lifting the veil?"

Erik could not help it. He snorted out a rueful laugh. "I never entertained such fantasies, Christine. Not when I was so certain no woman would ever consent to be my wife."

She took his hand in hers. "I did."

And still, it astonished him. "Yes, you did. And I will gladly wed you in whatever garments would most please you. But I do not want you to forego something important simply because you are marrying me."

Christine sighed and turned, nudging her way until she was pressed against his side, tucking his arm about her as was her wont. He shoved the laptop to the side, not wanting the interference. "You're supposed to take your mother shopping with you."

Erik had not known that. "I see."

"I just... Papa and I had talked about it a little. He had always assured me that he would go with me, when the time came. But he... can't. He can't be there to walk me down the aisle, to put my hand in yours and give his blessing. So I think... I think I'd rather we make it something special. Just for us?"

He lightly traced her arm with his fingertips, and when her head nestled so sweetly against him, he rather thought she was pleased. "I will hold your hand the entire time. I will walk with you and stand with you, and say before all others that you are mine and I am yours. There will be no others for me, Christine. Only you. And I shall promise to love you and care for you until my dying breath." He smiled down at her. His love. "Maybe even longer."

And two days later, Christine in her rain coat and Wellington boots, her red scarf knotted beneath her throat, he did precisely that.

And they were married.

Christine slid Erik's new ring upon his finger, feeling anxious and perhaps a little uncertain.

But more than that, happy.

The officiant permitted a kiss, and although she briefly thought that Erik would balk at doing so with a witness, yet he brushed his lips against her so gently that it nearly left her breathless.

It was her husband kissing her.

They had only the church secretary and the gardener as witnesses. And while perhaps the thought of that might once have made her sad, she now only felt a tingle of excitement. It was an adventure. All of this had been. Confusing, and tear-inducing, but enthralling nonetheless.

"Shall we go?"

Erik had warily shaken the pastor's hand, and he seemed to be inching toward the exit. Signing the license had been strange. She'd not had cause to use the new name on her ID, but now... now she supposed that was the name she shared with Erik. It was sad to consider she was forsaking Daaé —the name she had always known and cherished as it kept her close to her father. But as Erik had assured her, he'd held many names in his lifetime, and there was no need for her to be uneasy. The vows she made today were just as valid, no matter the identities on a sheet of paper. Those were promises for Erik, made before God, and she had meant them all most wholeheartedly.

Christine smiled sadly and gave her own thanks to those present, before reclaiming Erik's hand into her own. He gave it a little squeeze, and she already missed the feel of his skin beneath her fingers, as he'd donned his gloves almost immediately after the ceremony.

She tugged at the offending leather, and Erik smirked down at her in amusement. "Is something amiss, little wife?"

Christine flushed at her new title.

"I'd like to see your ring again. You're already used to seeing one on me."

He halted, pulling her left hand to his own and placing a kiss upon the rings settled there. "Now there are two," he reminded her.

She did not know how much money he'd spent to rush the process to secure her a diamond for her wedding, but he had. Quite a few diamonds in fact. It still mesmerized her when she watched it sparkle and catch the light, the larger center giving way to softly filigreed gold that reminded her of her mother's.

"I think there's a rule against disagreeing on one's wedding day."

Erik rolled his eyes and relented, pulling his glove off and presenting her with his newly uncovered hand. "Satisfied?"

She ran her thumb over the smooth gold, smiling all the while. "Very."

And the way he looked at her, his eyes so full of love and tenderness, she knew that he was equally pleased. Perhaps even more so than she.

"And where would it please you to go, wifely Christine?"

Christine grinned at that. Evidently he would be reminding her of her status quite a lot today.

But she didn't actually know where she wanted to go. They could go share a meal at a local spot. They could go walk down at the beach and watch the waves.

Or...

She swallowed.

"We could... we could go back to the house."

Erik eyed her carefully before he began walking toward the car. "Surely that is not enough of a celebration."

Christine nibbled at her lip. She had... attempted to broach the subject of marital intimacies before with him. He seemed to be deliberately obtuse as to her meaning. "You have made it very clear in your description of a husband, Christine, that I am to hold you frequently. Especially at night." And he would blink at her, waiting for her to expound, while her heart pounded and her cheeks flamed, and she tried to muster the courage to simply press on, asking if he was looking forward to being with her.

Because she was. To share that closeness, to know him better than any other.

Yet the words that would make her meaning all the clearer evaded her, so she had hurried away and buried herself in a book for a while.

He opened her door and helped her in, his fingers lingering a little longer this time about her waist. She leaned forward and kissed him, relishing the way they suddenly tightened about her in his surprise and, hopefully, in his pleasure at her spontaneity. "We're married." It still seemed rather incredible.

His eyes crinkled with his answering smile. "We are."

"And... and I think we can come up with something that would make today really special. Back at the house."

She looked at him meaningfully, and Erik's smile faded. Not the reaction she was hoping for. He suddenly looked nervous, and gaze fell from hers. "Put on your seat belt, Christine."

Christine's mouth dropped open as he pulled away, going to his own side and starting the car. Doubt filled her.

"Erik? Do you... do you not want to? With... with me?"

She had accepted that he was a man. Which is why it seemed a little ridiculous to even ask the question. But her Erik was different, and she realized that she had caused harm by not being more direct in her questions before—in having them discuss this at more depth. She had always presumed that her husband would take the lead in these matters. That he would woo and persuade while she took pleasure from his warm attempts at seduction.

But she hadn't married a fantasy. She'd married Erik, and all that entailed.

His grip on the steering wheel was firm, and she took some comfort in seeing the gold band upon his finger. She had put that there. He had been overjoyed at the prospect of it, and she would not begin to doubt things now.

"Do not be absurd, Christine."

She was not going to take this personally. She simply wasn't. But she was going to prod until she received the answers she needed—and only hoped Erik could be equally understanding on that front. "Then what's the matter? I... I want to." She couldn't believe how embarrassing it was to confess that.

Erik glanced at her sharply. She expected a tinge of anger, or maybe frustration. But instead his eyes were filled with pain. "Do you mean that?"

The light turned green and he was forced to turn away, but her heart was already hurting for him. Perhaps she should have waited to speak up until they were home, then she could have comforted him properly and eased him through these difficult conversations. All the while trying to stem her own outpouring of mortification.

"I'm sorry if I hadn't made that clear. I tried to bring it up, to discuss... expectations. But... I guess I lost my nerve."

His mouth was a thin line. "I hold no expectations of you. You need not do more than you desire simply to please me."

His tone held a great deal of distaste, and she could stand their distance no longer. She reached across the middle console and held onto his arm, her head resting against his shoulder. She held him loosely so he could safely maneuver the car, but it felt wrong talking about such intimate things when he felt so far away. "Mama always said marriage was learning about each other, in all things. What they liked, what they didn't, and just... trying your best to make them happy. I want to know you in that way. As… as a wife knows her husband. But only if you want me to."

Erik swallowed, pulling into the drive of their little temporary home and shutting off the car. Christine straightened. He wouldn't quite look at her, instead seeming to stare at the scarf, the one she had carefully washed and pressed after its jaunt in the sea. "I wish to know you, as a husband knows his wife. But…"

"But what?" she prodded gently.

Erik sighed, and when his eyes met hers, they held such sadness, such worry, that it was all she could do to keep still and allow him to speak instead of insinuating herself upon his lap, regardless of the steering wheel.

"What if you are displeased? What if you find me distasteful after all once you have seen? Once you have known? I would rather continue as we have been than for you to come to despise me."

How could she hope to undo years of the abuses that were heaped upon him?

Slowly.

And with care.

So his confidence could build, his assurance in her love for him. Perhaps it had been wrong to suggest they enter into their marriage so completely and all at once, but that did not mean they could not begin to build on their intimacies over time. And that would be good enough for her.

She took his hand, and smoothed her thumb over the bones of his knuckles. "Someday you aren't going to doubt me, Erik. You're going to know that I want you, and to be together... it will be as natural as breathing." She blushed, even to consider it fully. "Maybe it'll be awkward at first, though. Mama warned me about that. But she said practicing was fun, and eventually we'll get it right. And until then, we'll just keep getting to know each other, okay?" She plucked at his coat sleeve, in what she hoped he realized was a playful manner. "Maybe starting with a few less clothes."

Sooo... who guessed right? Erik really is a fan of those impromptu weddings... I wonder if it's because if he waits too long she'll change her mind... But who liked the wedding? And who thinks they should wait a while or jump straight into the more... interesting bits?

Until next time!