Fate Happens

by Divergent24-7

FourTris! This story is about Tris in modern day, and a old friend of her's who moved away when she was 14. They had fallen for each other, but when he moved away, he broke her, and she falls into a depression. Eventually she moves to Chicago and deals with her problems. Will that old friend be there to help? WARNING:depression/self harm and sexual content later in the story.

32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32:

TRIS POV:

It's been hours since Tobias has been in this hospital room, and as the hours drag on with multiple questions-that I refuse to answer-from Christina, the more I figure he's not coming back. He has a right to leave, but after everything, it doesn't seem like this is something that he would or even could do. Where could he even go? His father won't let him leave anywhere.

Honestly I feel bad for Tobias, he probably feels like he's stuck with me because he knows that if he leaves our relationship, I will try to leave the world. Right about now is his only chance because I can't try anything in a hospital and if they know I will try something when he leaves me, then they will put me on watch.

Eventually, I begin to glance at the wooden door every thirty seconds, almost as if I don't trust my ear's enough to hear the loud clicking noise it makes when it opens. Soon enough, Christina, sitting on my right side, becomes annoyed at my lack of interest in her.

"Seriously Tris, you will hear if the door opens, stop looking at it." She states exasperated with my previous actions.

So instead of looking at the door, I look out the large floor to ceiling window decently close to my bed. It's already pitch black outside, with the occasional parking lot light, illuminating the white lines painted on the road. The moon is not out tonight, or maybe it's just a sliver, but from my point of view, I can't see any of it. Some stars twinkle, contrasting against the harsh dark sky.

"Tris! God, you never seem to listen. I swear to god you have the attention span of Uriah." Christina huffs, obviously getting impatient with me.

She's about to rant on when a loud knock sounds from the door. Instantly my hopes are arisen, and I'm praying that it's Tobias behind that door. Christina calls out to the person outside telling them that they can come in. The door slowly opens, dragging on a dramatic effect that makes me pissed off, and even more so when I see that it most definitely is not Tobias.

"Hello, how are you feeling?" The nurse asks me as if she doesn't know that I wont talk to her...or anyone for that matter.

Christina stares at me waiting for me to speak, but as the seconds drag on, she eventually talks for me. "I think she's fine, but she still won't talk to me. Is there something you could give her to make her talk?"

"If you are insinuating that I can do magic, then sure, but I'm a nurse not a magician," then she turns to look at me, but still talking to both of us, "but, as Christina stated previously, I would like to talk to you about the absence of your talking. I have concluded that you have a psychiatric disorder as well as depression and anorexia. It wouldn't be fair of me to just send you somewhere you don't want to go, but I have assessed you, and as a result I would like to put you in the psychiatric ward for some time."

"What?" Christina bursts, getting up from out of her chair, in a pure rage. "Tris will be fine. She's always come out alive and there is no way I'm letting you take her away from me. Plus you need parental consent, Tris's parents wouldn't make her!"

"As a matter of fact, I don't need parental consent, her parents may think she is better when she really isn't and then the next thing you all know, she's gone. The laws says that, if I, her doctor, think it necessary to house her in the psychiatric ward, than I'm allowed to do so." The nurse states.

"Well then, what can change your mind? She want's to fight now," not completely true, "she really does, I need her and so does Four. We all need her and we can't have her if she is in some mental hospital."

The nurse looks obviously annoyed at Christina, "Fine, if she talks again, I will write on her charts that she is getting better, but if she doesn't by noon tomorrow, I'm admitting her."

"Thank you." Christina mumbles as the nurse, or doctor, gives me a side glance and walks out the room.

Not to long later, we hear some commotion outside the door. It's been fairly quiet since the nurse was in here, as Christina has stopped blabbing and is now sitting with her head in her hands, a distraught look with tears plastered on her face. Inside, I feel bad, I feel horrible for doing this to them. I know that if I stop talking that the nurse with put me in the mental hospital, but maybe then Christina and the others will give up on me, like Tobias must have.

I haven't seen him in hours. He's been gone for a long time, and I figure that what I imagined earlier is becoming no longer just daydream, but reality.

Then, as if the timing couldn't have been more perfect, I hear the door almost bust down, and as I look over to see a panicked Tobias rushing in, tossing a duffel bag down. I notice it to be mine, and instantly relief floods me. He had actually gone to my house, he didn't leave me like I suspected him to.

Tobias plops down in the chair on the other side of the bed that Christina's on and scoots as close to the bed as he can. He rests his right hand on top of my head, slowly and gently brushing my hair back while staring into my eyes with a scared expression.

"What happened? Why was Uriah and everyone mad at the nurse? And why didn't you call?" Tobias practically yells at Christina, while still being gentle with me.

Christina tries to speak, but her voice gets stuck in her throat and she chokes, beginning to cry out. She then moves back into her previous position with her head in her hands. Then Tobias looks to me for his answer and I can see the desperation and frustration in his eyes. Although I would tell him, I refrain for his own good, and instead shake my head, telling him that asking is not a good idea.

This just makes him more upset, so he turns towards Christina and yells, "What the hell happened? I have the right to know!"

"The...they want to put her in a psychiatric ward…"

Tobias's face changes almost instantly to confusion, as if he doesn't understand why they would even think it necessary. Then as quickly as that emotion came, another one appears, sadness.

"They can't do that…they can't do that without parent concent...right?" he mutters quieter than before, looking away from me and at Christina.

"The nurse said they can," then Christina has to stop to breath for a second, "she also said that the only way she won't admit her is if she talks… bu-but she refuses."

Suddenly I feel like I'm being talked about, not talked to or with. They are acting as if I'm not lying right in front of them. Tobias and Christina may not be trying to do it, but they are making me feel left out, though I suppose that is the price you pay for not talking. As if Tobias can read my mind, he turns back to look me in the eyes.

"Tris, please talk, please, for me." He practically gets on his knees and begs me.

But, he should know better, I don't just give up like that. I refuse, and even though he is persistent and continues to beg, I continue to shake my head, no. Eventually he stops begging and tells me, "Fine, if you won't talk to me, I'm going to go take our sulking friends, who do talk, out to get some coffee, this is going to be a long night."

Wow...that one actually hurt, and I can't stop the cringe to flash across my face. His eyes soften a little at it, but I don't think he realizes that it affected him as he still gets up and grabs Christina on his way out the door.

As soon as the door is shut, I'm almost paralyzed with the silence that suddenly surrounds me. I can't talk for them, I just can't. I don't care if that is what ends up to be why I go into the psychiatric ward, because maybe it would be better there. From there I won't be able to see what my old friends think about me on social media, and I won't have to go to school. Nobody will be able to stare at me and say mean things. I will basically not exist, which I feel would be good for me.

Though the more I think about it, the less appealing it is. The annoying hospital rooms, would be my permanent room, and I would have nurses coming to feed me everyday, all day. And, even if I wanted to, I wouldn't be aloud to stay in there forever, and as soon as I got out, the teasing and laughing would be even worse. I wouldn't just be the one who tried to kill herself twice, or the anorexic girl, I would be the girl who was so messed up, a doctor forced me to be under surveillance can't be my life, I might as well just get home schooled, and maybe they will let me be.

Eventually I become tired of lying down in the uncomfortable bed and get up, my legs a little wobbly. When I stand, black dots invade my vision for a split second, making me extremely dizzy, then disappear taking the dizziness away with it. I'm sure that will go away when I've been feed more through the IV, but for now, I rip the IV out of my arm leaving it at the bed.

I walk slowly over to the huge window, carefully lowering myself into a sitting position, with my legs folded in front of me. I stare out into the sky and the lights of the parking lot, looking around and observing the few people walking about. I think about the pro's and con's to talking again and not talking again. All of it seems to always lead to one point. Tobias.

Tobias claims he loves me, he claims that he didn't mean to kiss another girl, and he claims that he wishes he hadn't left me. All of these things put my trust in him to the test, as all he is doing is saying, this is how it is, not proving it. He can't prove if he did or didn't want to kiss that slut. He can't prove that he wishes he hadn't left me, but he can promise me. To believe him, I need to trust him, and surprisingly I find myself supporting his stories.

The only one I'm hesitant on is that he loves me, no matter how many times he tells me, I can't bring myself to actually believe that somebody loves me. How should I know what he's feeling, and there's almost no possible way he could show me. He has to be lying, that is the only thing that makes sense in my head. No one loves me. They may say they do, but I think that that is because they feel bad for me, and they are required 'love' me because of my 'unique' situations.

My train of thought is broken by the door being opened, and seconds later, strong arms are around me. I struggle to push him off, as my previous thoughts don't mix well with him hugging me tightly. I can tell that my wiggling and pushing didn't really get him off, but he lets go himself, for my sake. I look away, not able to look at him, with the things I was just thinking about floating back into focus.

"Tris, I love you." Instantly I turn my head to look at him, surprised because it's like he literally can read my mind. Then he continues, "I love you so much, but if you love me, you need to show me. Now is the time you show me. I know I left you, I know I cheated on you. But I swear to god if you ever asked me what my biggest regret is, I would say both of those things. I freaking cheated on you Tris, and some how you take me back. I've never been good enough for you, but for some reason, you keep coming back….

"But Tris," I stare into his eyes as tear begin to build and fall over onto his cheeks, "you've tried to kill yourself twice. Both times have been because of my doings. I know that if things don't change, you will try a third time, and that time no one will be there to save you. I know that saving is not what you want, but Tris, saving you is what I need.

"You've told me before that things won't change after you're gone, that the world will keep spinning, and the sun will still rise and set like normal." I can't believe he remembered me saying that, "But, if you're gone, my world will stop, it will stop spinning, it will become nothing. Sure the sun will rise and set, but I won't be able to not look at it without breaking, knowing that my brightness is gone."

He reaches over to the duffle bag that he threw down when he got in here and grabs something inside. Very slowly and carefully he pulls out a bouquet of roses that I recognize. All are red except for that one, this is what he gave me the day he left, that last thing he had given me.

Then, as if he read it over a thousand times, like I had, he recites what the note said, "You stand out to me, in a sea of red pain and anger, you are the white light. You are my angel. Tris none of this will be worth anything if you don't exist with me. When I wrote that, I cried the whole time, as soon as I left your backyard I fell down from bawling so hard on my way back home that night. I still have the guitar from when we were little, buried deep in my closet so that my father couldn't smash it. Tris, I never stopped loving you, and no matter what you or I do, I will never stop loving you.

"So, in return for my love, will you just do this one thing for me, just this one. Please just open those beautiful lips and speak to me. Please just let me hear your voice…"

Instant guilt raises in the pit of my stomach, and it's so harsh and strong that I have to look down at the flowers for a few minutes so that is subsides a little. But when I look back up into Tobias's hopeful and sorrowful eyes, the guilty feeling stabs me again, making me drop the flower and the tears I desperately tried to hold back, come out harder than ever.

"I-I'm sor-sorry."I barely get out.

Tobias just holds me and allows me to create a huge wet spot on his shoulder from my tears while he rubs up and down my back, simultaneously whispering sweet nothings into my ear. I can't stop repeating how sorry I am, my voice breaking throughout all of my words.

"Tris...you need to know something." He cautiously whispers into my ear. "I...uh, found your journal."

"You found my journal?" I try to speak softly, but instead it comes out quiet but harsh. And almost immediately my tear get slower and soon stop due to sudden anger.

I'm about the yell at him when he interrupt me, "I know I had no right, and I know you know how I got to it. I honestly wasn't looking for it, I was looking for clothes for you and with my teenager boy brain, I stopped on a compromising drawer. I know I shouldn't have, but I couldn't stop myself from thinking about how amazing you would look in some of it….and as I got further back I-uh, found some more….revealing stuff. That's around when I felt your journal."

I huff, exasperated, trying to ignore the fact that my cheeks are probably pure red as I think about him going through that drawer. "I'm guessing you read it…."

"Yeah, but only the first page, the first song you wrote, along with the entry, and then the last one." he says, reaching into the bag again and taking out the small book, that I have held close to my heart for so many years now, then places it in my hands. "I know I had no right to go through your personal stuff, but if you turn to the last page, I have something for you."

I flip to the last page, the page with the song I couldn't finish. When I get there, hand writing that does not belong to me fills up the page, making me stare at my journal in awe.

"I finished it, and if you don't mind I would like to test it out…" He tells me, "Sing it with me, it's a duet."

I clears her throat, trying to lose the obvious tears threatening to scratch my voice. I want to sound perfect for him.

Little do you know

How I'm breaking while you fall asleep

Little do you know

I'm still haunted by the memories

Little do you know

I'm trying to pick myself up piece by piece

Little do you know

I need a little more time

Underneath it all I'm held captive by the hole inside

I've been holding back for the fear that you might change your mind

I'm ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight

Little do you know

I need a little more time

Then he begins the part written in his handwriting, that he obviously had memorized.

I'll wait, I'll wait

I love you like you've never felt the pain,

I'll wait

I promise you don't have to be afraid,

I'll wait

The love is here and here to stay

So lay your head on me

Little do you know

I know you hurt while I'm sound asleep

Little do you know

All my mistakes are slowly drowning me

Little do you know

I'm trying to make it better piece by piece

Little do you know

I, I love you 'til the sun dies

After he sings, it's both of our turn to sing together, our voices lacing together like satin ribbon.

Oh wait, just wait

I love you like I've never felt the pain,

Just wait

I love you like I've never been afraid,

Just wait

Our love is here and here to stay

So lay your head on me

I'll wait (I'll wait), I'll wait (I'll wait)

I love you like you've never felt the pain,

I'll wait (I'll wait)

I promise you don't have to be afraid,

I'll wait

The love is here and here to stay

So lay your head on me

Lay your head on me

So lay your head on me

This sets the stitches in my heart for it to be sewn back together with the amazing thought put into his part. The honesty comes through in his voice, and the thought that he feels that way is the beginning to my cured heart. The ending of the song is the part that pulls the stitches in its place for the beginning of the healing process.

'Cause little do you know

I, I love you 'til the sun dies

Hey guys...I know it has been weeks since I have updated, but I have a good excuse this time actually, kind of. I got a concussion, and my doctor said no electronics, so my mom took my computer away to make sure of that because she knows I don't listen to the rules. Anyway long story short, it was only minor, and they said I would be fine in two week so I wrote this all tonight, which was more difficult than I anticipated. So I'm so sorry if this sucks, it's Tris's POV of the last chapter. Tell me if you liked it please, and thank you to all who have not given up on me. Don't forget that I love you all! Please review!

~divergent24-7