God Gave Me You 8
"Oh, let's have a little cuddle. Do you mind, Shelagh?" Sister Julienne asked as she entered the bedroom where Shelagh had just finished sewing Angela's newest dress. Sister Julienne had just come back from an all-night delivery and needed some time to unwind before facing the rest of a busy day.
The baby was sitting upright in her cot, quiet after having finally tired herself out from crying over nothing. Shelagh smiled at her mentor as she moved closer to her daughter.
"Of course not, Sister. You don't need to ask. Just be forewarned, we've been having a rough day so far."
"What's the matter my sweet?" Sister Julienne asked as she picked up her goddaughter and placed her on her shoulder, gently rocking her as she paced the small room.
"I've no idea..." Shelagh sighed. Angela, content in Sister Julienne's arms, let out a sigh similar to her mother's as she curled her tiny hand around the nun's wimple and relaxed. After a few more turns around the room, Sister Julienne took Angela to her office to give Shelagh a break. Making her way to the kitchen, Shelagh stopped at the sight in front of her.
"Trixie, don't you think this may be going a bit overboard for a one year old's birthday party?" Shelagh asked as Trixie continued to string paper chains and balloons over every available space in the Nonnatus sitting room.
"No, Shelagh, I don't." Trixie responded curtly. "It is my goddaughter's first birthday party and it has to be special. I told you a long time ago that I planned on spoiling her, I don't understand why you continue trying to stop me! Now, make yourself useful and hand me some tape...please." Shelagh shook her head and handed the roll to Trixie.
"Where is the birthday girl, by the way? I haven't seen her since breakfast."
"Sister Julienne took her to her office- she said it was to give me a break, but I think she wanted a distraction from her notes."
"Or a cuddle before nap time." Trixie responded with a grin.
Shelagh laughed in response. She'd been right when she said her daughter wouldn't be at a loss for love and attention-it seemed that every resident of Nonnatus House had taken Trixie's lead in spoiling her daughter to no end. She smiled to herself as she watched Trixie flit around the room with last minute preparations. She'd been truly blessed-not only with Angela, but the acceptance of everyone at Nonnatus.
Her saving graces had truly been Trixie and Sister Julienne. No matter how tired or busy they were, they always made time for their goddaughter. Everyone else had followed suit- especially Chummy after the birth of her son Freddie. There was less than six months between the two children and Shelagh was glad that Angela would always have a playmate. Almost like a sibling.
Lost in her own thoughts, Shelagh barely registered the footsteps of Sister Julienne walking towards her down the hallway.
"I think the birthday girl is ready for a nap, Shelagh. Is everything okay? You look a bit...lost."
"I'm fine, Sister. Just thinking." Shelagh said softly, placing a smile on her face as she reached for her daughter. "Hello, sweetheart. Did you have a nice time with Sister Julienne?" Angela nestled her head between Shelagh's shoulder and neck, her thumb immediately going to her mouth in a sleepy state. "How about we go take a nice rest before your party, hmm?" Shelagh smiled at the nun as she walked past her down the hallway and up to their room.
Coming back down as soon as Angela fell asleep, Shelagh found Sister Julienne waiting for her with a fresh cup of tea.
"Thank you, Sister. She always seems to drop off easily with you. It's quite the blessing after the day we've had." Shelagh smiled sadly.
"Are you sure alright, my dear? You don't seem yourself."
"I'm fine, Sister. Nothing to be concerned about. Just...my mind is getting away from me today."
"I can hardly believe Angela is already a year old. Seems like only yesterday that Sister Evangelina barged into my office about you dropping all the fresh instruments due to your labor." Sister Julienne chuckled, earning a half-hearted laugh from Shelagh.
Taking a sip of her tea, Shelagh tried to gather her thoughts. "I didn't think it would be this hard for me today. I thought it would be such a happy occasion that I wouldn't feel like this."
Sister Julienne looked concerned before Shelagh cut back in.
"Oh, not that I'm unhappy Sister! Nothing like that...I love Angela more than I ever thought it possible to love and I wouldn't trade a moment with her for anything in the world. It's just, today of all days, I wish she had another parent to comfort her. That it wasn't me alone."
Shelagh tried not to mention his name. It hurt too much that none of them could find him, especially since he'd always been a phone call away before he left. Now, there was nothing. She thought of Patrick every day. Every time she looked at her daughter, she saw him reflected at her through her daughter's features.
"Shelagh...you're never alone." Sister Julienne moved to take up a spot next to her, holding her hand and squeezing gently. "We are all here for you, and no matter what we will never stop looking."
About an hour later, their companionable silence was interrupted by Trixie carrying a babbling Angela on her hip.
"Look who's awake and ready for her party! The birthday princess herself!" Trixie giggled with Angela following suit. "Shall we have some cake? Before Sister Monica Joan finds it? Yes, I think so too!" Angela continued to babble and clap her hands, and Shelagh sent up a thankful prayer that her daughter was so well loved.