Sherlock's wonderful idea of spending time turned out to be playing 'ask your little brother as many embarrassing personal questions as possible and deduce all answers from his reactions even before he could as much as open his mouth to answer or protest'. Of course, Sherlock was quite nearly always right about everything he observed, and Q was fuming after just five minutes.
"So… there is a girl, isn't there? You blushed as soon as I asked about relationship… Wait… Oh, that's hilarious! She doesn't even know you exist, does she!? You like her – a lot. That's clear by the way your eyebrows twitch. But you are discreetly scratching your left arm which means you are disappointed about the whole thing-"
"I am not! That's not true!"
"- Oh, yes. She must be someone you see a lot and you're hoping she will realize your intentions soon… I'm afraid she is not interested, sorry. – Sherlock looked at him closely, quite obviously concentrating at something. "Aha! She's older! By what, 2-3 years? Hmm, interesting. But I think it makes sense… You have never been normal for your age, anyway-"
"Hey, look who's talking! You've never been normal for ANY age, just so you know!"
Sherlock totally ignored his outburst. "Is she a colleague? I wouldn't think so… But then you have to keep your life secret from her? Forget it, it wouldn't work anyway!" – By then Q really just wanted to hit his head on the desk. Or better yet: the wall. Too bad it probably would make too much noise.
32 minutes later
"So, your biggest fear is that people won't take your work seriously enough because of your age? Hm… well, yeah, I guess, being the youngest ever… whatever you are… must do that to you. But you're nails tell me-"
"My NAILS?"
"-tell me that you shouldn't be afraid of that. God knows why but they all seem to adore you. They may regard you as a little puppy, of course…"
Would it be too conspicuous if Q strangled Sherlock right here and now? Would anyone hear it?
"The fact that you haven't even taken any days off until now and the state of your hair tell me-"
"I DON'T CARE! Just shut up!" – Q had to concentrate very hard on hissing instead of shouting.
Sherlock was absolutely glowing. "You said you didn't want to be bored! Admit it: you're not bored now!"
"No, I'm just as near to a heart-attack as you can get! Besides, it's my turn now" – Q smirked maliciously and for the first time since this madness had started, he felt something akin to real mirth. "Let's see… I observed you're sad and disappointed that John has gone to his sister's instead of coming with you here."
"That's ridiculous; if that's all you can come up with, you're even more hopeless then I've thought!" – But curiously enough Sherlock seemed to be uneasy.
"Thank you, you just confirmed my theory!" – Q, too, was positively gleaming now. "Your voice betrayed your displeasure the first time you told me about John not being available right now to help you. You also said you didn't have any friends – with spitting out the word 'friend' as if it were some particularly nasty and disgusting piece of food. You would like to have friends! You wish to have people whom you could trust and could call upon for such adventures instead of your little brother who is probably the only one who can eventually outsmart you – that's me by the way – and you wish you weren't so damn alone all the time."
"Alone is what I have, alone is-"
"What protects you. Yeah, I know, you have said that a lot. But do you really believe it?"
"Of course, I do, don't be ridiculous!"
"So, you don't… hmm… interesting. I also know…"
2 hours and 42 minutes later
"So, little brother, it's a tricky one: 32x895?"
"28.640" – Came the instant answer even before Sherlock could check it on the calculator of his phone.
"That's impossible. You HAVE to be cheating! Nobody can calculate in head like that."
"Well, it would seem like someone can…"
"I don't believe you. I'm going to find out how you do it." Sherlock looked like he took it as a personal offense if his little brother turned out to be better at math than him. "5674/13?"
Q said without any hesitation: "436,461538… should I continue?"
"Pfff… no, it's quite enough."
1 hour and 51 minutes later
"So, Sherlock, the next word: 'murder'"
"Let's see: assassination, homicide, manslaughter, slaying, felony… hmm… massacre. Your word is: 'geek'
"Very funny… Ok: nerd, techie, guru, buffoon and no, I absolutely refuse to say the word you want to hear!"
"Why? Does it hit close to home, brother dear?"
"Maybe I just want to be considerate to you. It's you, after all, who is mostly called that."
"Cheeky"
"Impertinent"
"Insolent"
"Bold"
5 hours and 23 minutes later
Q and Sherlock didn't remember going to sleep when they suddenly bolted awake with a feeling of something being very-very wrong. The first thing Q registered was that he found himself neither at home nor in his hotel room. The first thing Sherlock noticed was that his little brother was using his arm as a pillow and that this fact, with the combined effect of sitting on the hard floor in a very small space for a long time, caused much pain.
The second thing both brothers noticed were two guards standing in the room in front their hiding place, looking down at them murderously.
One of them dangerously said: "Good morning, gentlemen."