Summary: Non-canon, Drama/Romance, hopefully with some Action/Adventure thrown in. Bellarke, Linctavia and probably more once I get going. :D
Rated M – for adult themes.
Disclaimer: Just borrowing The 100, not for profit!
A/N: This chapter turned out so long I split it into two. The second part of the flashback scene is pretty intense (I hope) and includes description of a fire scenario and burn wounds - just warning you. Also it's a bit dark and angsty, for me anyway. Sorry.
The Homestead
Chapter 13 – Bellamy.
After all the excitement of the rotation day and Lincoln's proposal, things slowly returned to routine at the ranch.
As usual there was plenty of work to be done. Winter was almost upon them; although given the warm autumn they'd experienced so far, it may not turn out to be as cold as the last. Still, they needed to be prepared.
Extra hunting details had been scheduled and the preserving crew were busy smoking and pickling meat, as well as canning fruits and vegetables. Raven, Wick and their team had worked successfully on refrigeration over the summer, along with a myriad of other projects, and were now tasked with developing a large freezer storeroom.
Bellamy was officially assigned to field duty this rotation – prepping the soil and crops for winter as well as training the new rotation members on the pruning and planting details. He had an affinity with the farm duties but he enjoyed turning his hand to any of the jobs on the ranch. Hence, in his allocated time off he usually did whatever the hell he wanted – attaching himself to a hunting rotation or firewood detail, sometimes he even helped Harper and the kitchen crew, or Monty and Nyko in the hothouses. He liked to do the watering, before they developed an automatic system for that.
Sometimes he scouted for scraps for the tech crew on his outings but he rarely worked directly with them on projects. Despite the fact that he knew nothing about engineering, he couldn't handle the intensity and innuendo in the room when Raven and Wick were working, or was it toying, with each other. He wondered how the rest of the detail did it. It was downright disturbing.
Bellamy kept busy, and it was comfortable, and he was happy. Octavia and Lincoln were to be wed at the winter solstice celebrations and he would be an uncle by mid spring. He thought about that a lot.
When he did think about it, his thoughts strangely transitioned to Clarke. He remembered their last meeting and the promises they had made to each other.
It had been four months and he hadn't seen her once in all that time.
They'd managed to communicate indirectly through others, but it had always been so… painfully platonic. Any time her name was mentioned or he received some kind of update on her activities, he cursed himself for kissing her that night. It made everything so much more difficult – having tasted her, having held her so close and then having had her torn away so abruptly and for so long.
But, he reminded himself, if he hadn't kissed her they may never have made their commitment to come back to each other.
There may never have been the potential for something else, something better - something more.
He could live with the torture of that treasured moment, he told himself.
He'd lived with much worse - that was for sure.
After last winter, he was lucky to be alive at all.
He had let go. Just like Octavia suggested.
It was easier than he expected it to be, at first. Maybe because he had already done half the work – trying to forget.
He busied himself with Lincoln's combat training, spent more time alone in the woods or on the farm, stopped fooling around and getting drunk every other night and took time to read, like he used to, in another life, on the Ark.
He still worked hard, because – well they were building a civilisation damn it, and it just felt good. After all the pain he'd caused, it felt right to use his strength to create something sacred, as opposed to taking it away.
By the time the winter solstice arrived, they had developed enough infrastructure to support them through the cold and into the spring and summer months.
Bellamy truly believed he had moved on – that he was ready to embrace a new life. He'd come to see the homestead for what Octavia had described to him – a second chance. Nothing was going to ruin that.
Until the winter solstice festival brought acting commander Clarke from her posting in Polis and an old foe threatened to turn everything they'd strived for at the ranch, to dust.
Bellamy raked his eyes over each of the crew that had just escaped from the inferno, searching their sooty faces and smoke filled eyes, offering water and blankets where he could.
The last to enter his line of sight were Raven, Jasper and Monty – the two boys spluttering and coughing as they supported their friend away from the blazing heat of the burning homestead hall and slumped on the ground in safety.
"Where's Clarke?" Bellamy asked breathlessly. He hadn't seen her in the crowd of casualties. He had been drawn away like most of the others by the decoy fires at the work shed and sleeping quarters, unaware that the fires had been deliberately lit and the real target was the people filled hall. "I haven't seen her, or her guards." He looked around hurriedly as he spoke.
"Her guards are dead," Raven cried, tears streaking down her ash covered face.
"What?" Bellamy's heart beat faster.
"It's Emerson," Monty managed between coughs.
"Emerson?" What the hell.
"He lit the fires. He has Clarke in the kitchen… we tried to stop him…"
Bellamy didn't wait for Monty to finish. He wrenched a cloth from Lincoln's hand, drenched it in a bucket of water, covered his nose and mouth and raged into the burning building.
Before Lincoln could gather what he was doing, Bellamy was consumed by the flames, leaving his friends to gape in horror behind him.
The homestead hall may have been beyond saving but he had to believe that he could still help Clarke. He had to believe that after everything they'd been through it wasn't going to end like this.
It was in that burning building, as he navigated through the flames and thick smoke - trying not to let the intense heat of the blaze overwhelm him, that he realised – letting go had been easy, because he hadn't actually let go.
The anger and irrational emotions may have eased – but he still held her in his heart. If he lost her here, in this fire tonight, then he may as well burn to the ground himself.
He saw her hands first – tied behind her back to one of the beams between the kitchen and the hall space.
The kitchen was at the back of the building and as such, hadn't succumbed to the fire quite as much. It was the roof that he was worried about. He'd heard it creaking and crackling as he made his way towards her. If he didn't free her and get them both out of their soon, they'd be trapped beneath it.
He crouched down in front of her and lifted her blackened chin.
"Bellamy," she rasped and then her eyes lit up with warning. "Look out"