A/N: Hello everyone! Hooray for the weekend! I think we got some good stuff going on in this chapter. Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 13: What Used to Be

It was nearly eight in the morning, and Severus wasn't awake yet. I couldn't go back to sleep, so I decided on cooking breakfast for us this morning. I tip toed my way down the stairs and into the kitchen, waving at the fireplace to start warming up the area.

His house at Spinner's End was small, but it's not like we needed some extravagant mansion. We had all the necessities here, and that was all we needed.

I took out a few pans for bacon, eggs, and pancakes, and started the coffee pot. Luckily, we had just went to the market yesterday to restock, so we had more than enough to feed the two of us for several weeks. I started with the pancakes first, since they take the longest to prepare. There was something about cooking that was very relaxing, especially when I do it in the morning after waking up, so I chose to not use my magic and do everything by hand.

I was about halfway through cooking everything when I felt arms wrap around my waist and a kiss to the side of my neck.

"Good morning to you too," I sighed, relishing in his morning greeting to me. I couldn't be distracted for long though, or else the bacon would burn.

"I did want to have a lazy day with you, but I see you felt a need to be the complete opposite," Severus said, still groggy from just waking up. He kissed my temple before making himself a cup of coffee. "I could ask Binky to finish cooking and serve us our breakfast in bed," he suggested, taking a sip of his coffee.

I smiled, flipping a pancake. "Breakfast in bed does sound good for a Saturday," I thought, flipping the bacon this time.

"I know a good way to pass the time while the elf cooks," he said, rather enticingly. He came over and wrapped his arms around me again, but pulled me towards him, and I clearly felt something that also woke up with him.

I wriggled my backside into him and he left out a soft moan into my ear, and I could feel heat pooling down south. I turned around and nibbled his bottom lip.

"You better tell that elf to come now before the bacon burns."

My body seemed to wake up naturally as I registered a warm body laying behind me. I turned over, relieved to see familiar black hair on the pillow. His back was towards me, and I could softly hear his breathing as he exhaled through this mouth. I softly kissed his temple before making my way to the bathroom to relieve myself.
Before exiting the bathroom, I took a long look at myself in the mirror. It has been a hell of a school year at Hogwarts. I don't think I've been through so much in a year. To be honest, I really didn't think that I would have lasted a whole year if I was still stuck outside of this world. It suddenly dawned on me how much I have changed, and that there is still hope for me. Auntie Minnie can see it and Severus can see it, so why shouldn't I see it as well? I know it will be a long road to recovery, as clearly shown by this whole year alone, but I think I will have some semblance of being a normal person in due time.

I quickly splashed some water on my face and patted myself dry before returning to the bedroom. I was surprised to see Severus sitting up and awake in my bed, reading a book of all things.

"Good morning, Mia," he greeted me, putting the book face down on his lap.

"Good morning. I thought you would still be sleeping when I got out," I said, walking over and joining him again under the blankets.

He opened his arm to me as I rested myself against his side. He was reading one of my textbooks. "I was awake the moment you got out of bed. I had sensed your movement and saw you heading towards the bathroom."

"I'm sorry if I woke you then, I was trying to be as quiet as I could," I said, feeling a little guilty.

"There's no need to apologize. I am a light sleeper, as you have said before, it comes with the territory." He smirked as I playfully swatted his chest. What a jerk.

We spent the rest of the morning being lazy in bed, Severus reading the book while I dozed in and out of sleep. At some point he summoned Kolry to bring us breakfast, which was when we had decided to finally get out of bed and had our meal on the couch.

"Do you think the school is still in danger after what happened last night?" I asked him, finishing off my plate. He looked into the fire, deep in thought.

"From what I understand of the situation, no. Potter was somehow able to neutralize Quirrell, that insane excuse of a man. When I had made my way to where Quirrell had Potter, Quirrell was literally a pile of ash. There is no way he can return from that. As for the item that was being pursued by both parties, the Headmaster has decided the item must be destroyed." He set his cup down before continuing. "As for the Dark Lord, I am unsure at this moment what the Headmaster wants to do." He thought for a few seconds as I sat there, thinking about my incident with Professor Quirrell and how that would tie in to everything.

"If the Dark Lord does return," he started, looking at the fire. His eyes told a different story from the tone of his voice. I could see he was thinking about something that affected him, but I didn't want to force him to tell me anything he doesn't want to. "If he returns, we just might possibly have another war on our hands."

"Another?" I said surprisingly. "There were wars before?"

The next hour was spent giving me a history lesson on the First Wizarding War. I can't believe there was a man that existed that wanted so much power. He reminded me of Hitler in some ways. It was frightening to know that there could be a possibility of him returning, and that he wants me to be on his side. I knew for a fact that would never happen. I would rather die than to be under the command of something like him.

"In any case, we should continue your training. There is still much for you to learn," he concluded, and I agreed. He set his cup down next to our plates, and waved his hand toward the dishes. They disappeared, showing my table that was underneath.

I don't think I'll ever get over magic like that.

"I believe I have overstayed my welcome," Severus said, rising to leave. I walked around the couch to meet him at the door.

I wrapped my arms around him before placing a gentle kiss on his lips. "You are always welcome here," I told him, smiling. His gazed softened as he returned the kiss.

There was something about having physical contact with him that made me forget everything else that was going on. I stepped closer to him as his arms snaked around my waist, his hands going under my shirt and caressing my back. I melted at his touch, my hands finding their way up into his raven black hair, and tugging on it just enough to elicit a response from him. His hands wandered lower as they grabbed onto my hips.

Suddenly, fear ran through me.

Memories of Lucas pinning me down with his hands in that exact spot started to flood my mind. The countless mornings looking at my hips and running my hands over the bruises where his fingers once were, now clouding this sweet moment I was having. I grabbed onto his shoulders and abruptly stepped back, looking at him with wide eyes. We were both gasping for breath.

"Sorry," I breathed, trying to banish the tears from my eyes. He just looked at me as I looked everywhere but his face, trying to bring myself back to earth. I finally willed myself to look at him, and he looked guilty.

"Did I hurt you?" he asked, concerned about how he touched me. I shook my head.

"No, not at all, I.." my voice trailed off as I shut my eyes, trying to push away those horrible memories. "I just wasn't ready for that."

Cautiously, he laid a hand on my shoulder. "I wish to not put you in any situation you are not comfortable with. I apologize for making you feel uneasy."

"It's not your fault, really. It will just take me some time to get there," I said, reassuring him and hoping it will help him feel better. I wrapped my arms around him again and gave him another kiss. "Are we back to our usual schedule? Or will there be more interruptions with trolls and weird professors?" I asked jokingly.

Thankfully, he smiled. "I will see you later on today. We shall meet in my quarters. We will brew our potions in there." He kissed my forehead before walking out the door.

"Mia, my dear Mia," Lucas said, walking over to me. He ran a single finger down my cheek as I tried to move away, but I couldn't. We were in a dark room, the only light shining on top of us. My arms were bound behind me with metal shackles.

"If only you knew how much you mean to me, how much you mean to us," he said, waving towards the darkness. As he circled around me, more lights started to shine, and I realized I was surrounded by people in hooded robes and masks. There was no way to tell who was hiding behind those masks.

He grabbed me by the hips, just like he always does. He pulled me forward, yanking my arms back and feeling the pain in my shoulders. I tried to yell at him to stop, but I couldn't hear myself. Where did my voice go? He lowered his head, licking me up from my chest, up my neck, and around my ear. He felt cold, and his tongue slithered like a snake. I could feel chills and goosebumps throughout my whole body. His mouth was dangerously close to my ear; I could feel his breath as he exhales.

"It's such a shame your parents had to take you away from all of this. But now that you're here, you can claim what's rightfully yours."

More lights started to turn on, and it showed a rather large room, all made of black and white marble. There were two large spiraling staircases that lead to the second floor, and a large double door straight ahead. I still couldn't speak, but I could hear strange whispers flooding my mind. They almost reminded me of a snake hissing in my ear, but they were speaking in a language I didn't know. I looked around the room, and the hooded men and masks were still there. It was like they were statues that never moved.

His grip on my hips tightened as he came face to face with me. "And I will be right there beside you, guiding you every step of the way," he growled, his eyes turning stone cold as my clothes flew off of me. He slammed me on the ground as my arms went above my head, still bound together.

He kissed me hard, making my lips bleed as he buried himself inside of me. I tried to scream again, but there was nothing to hear. I could feel the warm tears fall from my eyes as the burning between my legs began to feel worse and worse. I refuse to look at him and turned my head to the side.

Severus, please, save me.

I woke up in a cold sweat on my bed. I've never had a dream like that before, and it angered me down to the core. I'm so sick and tired of Lucas still making an effect on my life. I want to end this, once and for all. No matter how much I move on with the rest of my life, he somehow manages to stay in my head, and he is definitely not welcome in there.

Mia, my love, are you awake?

"You're a fucking bastard, Lucas!" I yelled, looking around for him.

I love you when you're so feisty like this. Tell me, are you ready to claim what's rightfully yours?

Was he in that dream with me? I could slowly feel a headache starting as I cradled my head in my hands. "I'm ready to have you out my life. Permanently!" I hissed, closing my eyes, trying to make the headache go away.

"Whatever you did to have this connection with me needs to stop. We're done," I added, tears starting to fall down my cheeks.

Don't be so harsh, my love. I know we can make this work. Meet me in the forest just outside of Hogwarts tonight. I will explain everything, and you can make your choice then.

And with that, my thoughts went silent again. I buried my face in my pillow, willing the last of my headache to go away. I started sobbing, partly because I was just so fed up, but also because the end is in sight. Tonight, it would be over. I don't care what Lucas has to say or has to offer, enough is enough.

With a heavy sigh, I stopped crying and got ready to meet with Severus.

As I was making my way to his room, I ran into Auntie Minnie.

"Hi Auntie, I'm sorry but I won't be able to meet with you tonight," I told her as I approached her.

She looked at me with confusion. "That's fine, dear. Is everything alright?" she asked, looking me over.

"I'm okay, I'm not sick or anything," I reassured her. "I'm settling things with Lucas tonight. Going to finally get some closure." I could feel the anger flickering through me.

Auntie looked at me again, this time with more concern. "Surely you can't be going alone. Will Severus be accompanying you?"

"This is between me and Lucas. I don't want to drag Severus into it more than he already is." It's bad enough that he was/is friends with him, and I'm still trying to come to terms with that. Besides, it was hard enough letting him into that part of my life in the first place, although now I'm okay with it. He's done way too much for me, I can't ask him or have him there while I hash it out with Lucas.

"Don't worry about it," I said, with finality. I gave Auntie Minnie a hug, knowing she did not like the situation one bit. "I'll be fine. I can handle this on my own."

"Well, if you must, but I must insist you come and see me when you are finished. I want to make sure you are okay, and there are probably things we need to discuss afterwards," she replied, sighing. I nodded as we parted ways.

I was pouring the last the potion into the vial when I felt Severus's hand on my shoulder.

"Is everything alright?" he asked, sensing my anxiety and panic skyrocketing.

"Lucas spoke to me today, before I left to come here," I started, putting the stopper on the vial and setting it down. "He wants to meet with me tonight."

He moved to say something, but I raised my finger before he could speak. "Don't you start. I'm going by myself. This is between me and Lucas, and I think I can take care of myself."

I wrapped my arms around his stiff body. I could tell he wasn't happy with the whole situation, but this is something I needed to take care of. I stayed there with my arms wrapped around him until he finally allowed himself to hold me in return. My heart was pounding, knowing our meeting time was closing in. He kissed the top of my head as he held me tighter and I clung onto his coat.

"He is a powerful wizard, one that can inflict horrible pain to anyone in his way. I worry for your safety, but I understand your wishes," he said, quietly.

I pulled away so I can look him in the eyes. "Then tell me who he is, and what he's capable of, and I can be ready for whatever he does to me. He's put me through the ringer already, there's not much more damage he can do to me."

He kissed me softly before leading me to his rooms. He motioned for me to sit on his couch while he made a cup of tea for the both of us. He gave me mine and took a sip of his before starting.

"Where would you like me to start?" he asked, looking at me warily.

"Start from the beginning." I'd like to be as prepared as I can before I see him.

"His name is not Lucas. He is Lucius Malfoy, and he comes a line of very wealthy people. His family are all purebloods, meaning every person in the Malfoy bloodline are witches and wizards. I guess you can say he was born into this high social status, and he was very well brought up that way.

He's a very influential man, and will use his power and money to make certain things go his way. He's a ruthless man; if he doesn't like you, he will make it known. I've only seen him fight briefly in the First Wizarding War, but he can do some damage."

"What about your friendship? How long have you been friends with Luca - Lucius." It was weird to use his real name, still don't like it nonetheless.

"He is a few years older than me and was a student when I started at Hogwarts. We were both in Slytherin. We have been friends through my whole time as a student, up until I have known what he has done to you. He says I've gone soft, but I think otherwise. He had a wife, Narcissa, but she left him years ago because he became too greedy. He has a son who is a student here now, Draco. I'm sure you've seen the blonde boy walking around the halls.

There is something I need you to understand: Lucius does not take a simple 'no' for an answer. He will do whatever it takes to get what he wants. He has many tricks up his sleeve, and he will twist you and turn you until you say yes. You must stay strong when you see him, and don't let him make you think otherwise. If he lays one finger on you, Merlin knows what I would do to him."

"I'm sure I'll be fine. Thank you for telling me all of that," I said, resting my hand on his knee. It was a lot to digest, but I did feel a lot better going into this meeting knowing what his intentions with me really are. I knew all along he wasn't really wanting me back because his heart wants it. He only wants me for his benefit, whatever that may be. I looked over at the clock, realizing I had just enough time to make it over to our meeting place.

"I have to go," I told him, setting my cup on the table. As I stood, he took me into his arms and held me close. I've never seen him so affectionate with me before. Even the night we spent together in my room, he was still very hesitant to put his hands on me, but I never meant for it to go past what it did. May be there is some credit to this fear he has of me seeing Lucius on my own, but I can't let that cloud my thoughts now. All I could do was wrap my arms around him and reassure him that I would be okay.

"I insist that you see me afterwards," he said, returning the embrace.

I laughed, remembering how insistent Auntie Minnie was when she asked me the same question. "You're going to have to take a number for that. Auntie Minnie already asked me to see her as well."

"Then I ask that you come and see me after speaking with Minerva," he replied, smirking. I nodded and kissed him on the cheek before leaving to meet Lucius outside of the castle.

The castle was quiet tonight, the students already in their dormitories. Tomorrow, they would be on their way home for the summer, and I'm sure they're all happy and excited for the year to finish. I reached the gates and quickly looked back to make sure no one was following me. I didn't see anyone, so I opened the gates and stepped through the wards to the outside world. It was still a little walk to get to our meeting spot, but I could feel the night getting darker and darker the farther I got away from the castle. As I got closer to the treeline, I could see a familiar blonde man leaning against one of them.

"My lovely Mia," Lucius said, taking my hand and kissing the back of it. It took all the willpower in me to not regurgitate whatever was in my stomach.

"I'm not your lovely anything," I said coldly, taking my hand back. I could slowly feel myself being nervous, but I quickly turned those feelings into anger and confidence. "I know everything about you, Lucius," I spat out. "What I can't figure out is why me? How do I fit into your crazy world?"

"Ah, I see you have found out my true identity." He looked down at his cane as he thought for a moment. "Well, I guess it was only a matter of time before you would have it all figured out. You were always so clever."

We were silent for a few moments. I looked around, the castle in the distance, and the moon shone brightly above us. I was trying to look everywhere but him, and he was staring only at me. I couldn't tell what he was thinking at the moment, his eyes wouldn't give anything away. Suddenly, he stepped closer to me and cupped my face with his hands. I tried to turn away, but he held on tightly.

"You definitely have the eyes of a Black," he said, running his thumb along my cheekbone.

"What?" I asked, confused as hell. Who is Black? What is Black?

"Yes. Black. Your family. You weren't always a bloody Taylor, you know," he said, taking his hands off of me. "Your parents selfishly took you away from a life of power, wealth, and fame. They ran when they should have stayed to fight for what was right."

My head was spinning. I was a witch at one point in my life? This doesn't make sense. I've always lived in California, I never knew magic until I came here, and my parents certainly weren't magical themselves. I'm pretty sure they would have told me if any of us were.

"You're a liar," I told him, seething. "And don't you ever talk about my parents like they were cowards. You never knew them." My blood was boiling.

He looked at me for a moment before picking something out of his pocket. He twisted the top of his cane, and pulled out what looked like his wand, and tapped it on the item. It enlarged into what looked like a photo album.

"May be this will help you see," he said quietly. He handed over the photo album to me.

It was an old brown leather album with a small gold plate on the front that read "Black Family". I opened the cover, and there was a moving picture of a baby in a crib. I turned the page, and saw two familiar faces smiling back at me.

"That's my mom and dad," I said, brushing my fingers over the pictures. Sadness filled my heart, and the memories of them began to flood my mind. How could they hide something from me? And how could I have no recollection of this life?

As I flipped through the pages, I saw myself getting older and older. There were a handful of pictures of them seeing me off to whatever school I went to, then there was one of my graduation. I couldn't read what my robes said, but they were proud of me. There were even a few with Auntie Minnie. Pictures from vacations we took filled the last few pages before I hit the back cover.

"How am I able to not remember this life that I had?" I asked Lucius, holding the album close to my heart.

Lucius sighed. "If I had that information, I would have told you, but unfortunately I do not. What I do have to offer is the chance for you to rejoin the society that you belong to. You don't need some teaching job to find your place here. With your status, you can do whatever you may please, and you can be a very influential voice in the Ministry. I can help you there."

I closed my eyes and turned around. There was so much information to digest, and I couldn't do it fast enough. I feel like I am stuck at a crossroad: one road leads to a life of wealth and fame, while the other is a bit more unknown, but the people that I truly love and care about will be there to help me along the way. Lucius will only guide me until it doesn't benefit him anymore, which will mean I will be on my own once I become useless to him.

"I can't believe I'm saying this. Thank you, Lucius," I said, turning back to him with tear filled eyes.

"Think nothing of it. Now, my dear, are you ready to live your real life?" he said, holding his hand out to me.

I took a step back. "No, you didn't let me finish. Thank you for showing me who I am, but my answer still hasn't changed. I don't care what was left for me, it can stay there until I'm ready to face it. I like where I am at right now, and I'd like to continue the life I'm living – without you."

I turned to walk towards the castle when he spoke again. "Do you love him?" he asked. "Severus. Do you love him?" He almost sounded sad - just almost.

Without hesitation, I turned around and looked at him straight in the eyes. "Yes. I do love him. He is more of a gentleman than you will ever be." His face looked like his life just fell apart before his eyes, but it didn't matter to me. I turned to start walking again.

That was it. No more Lucius. With every step I took away from him, I could feel the heaviness in my chest slowly fly away and never come back. There were definitely questions that needed to be answered, and Auntie Minnie will be the person to help me. I can't help but wonder why-

"Crucio!" was the last thing I heard Lucius yell before my world turned black.