Giles hadn't been lying when he said we wouldn't just be encountering vampires in the weeks and months to come. Before long, our little group was getting involved in more and more dark, supernatural things that sometimes border-lined on the ludicrous.

Witches, demons, giant insects…you see my point, I trust? And of course there were always vampires in there somewhere.

The unrest was still in the air. I could feel it, and it only got stronger every day. I didn't like the feeling I was getting that we'd missed something, that the Master had something up his sleeve that we hadn't counted on, expected, or knew about.

As uneasy as all of the activity made me, I have to confess I was grateful for it. Please don't take that the wrong way, but going through so many trials and close calls, it brought us all closer together. I couldn't help but enjoy that.

I've said this before, I know, but I've never had many friends, and suddenly finding myself part of a group like this, part of a sort of family, it was a wholly new and intriguing experience for me that I couldn't help but relish and revel in.

I almost found myself hoping something else would happen so we could continue having our adventures. Not because I wanted anyone to be in danger, of course. No, I hated it when anyone got in trouble, but at the same time the thrill of the chase, the fight, the victory…it's hard not to get addicted to that.

My relationship with the group had improved a great deal.

They were finally coming to accept that I wasn't there to be the big baddie who turned traitor at the first opportunity.

I think Giles had a great deal to do with that, bless him.

Willow had always been more than willing to accept me, the dear heart. We would meet in the library every day, with the group, of course, but afterward as well. And almost every Thursday night (her allowance day) we would practically raid the local bookstores.

I kept insisting I could buy the whole place for her if she only asked me to, but she never did. She wanted to earn her books herself, so they could truly feel like her own, she said.

She's just that way.

Xander and I had a few awkward times at first. I could tell Jesse's demise still bothered him, and small wonder. We finally had a long discussion about it, and I finally got him to understand what had happened had not been his fault, nor could he have prevented it.

After that he returned to his joking, somewhat bumbling self.

Willow continued to love him, and he continued to become more and more infatuated with Buffy.

Buffy and I…well, we improved. She did finally stop giving me wary glances when she thought I wasn't looking, and while she didn't approve of my habit of stealing blood packs from the hospital, I invited her to come along one night so she could see what exactly it was I did.

I showed her I always checked the list for patients awaiting transfusions or anything remotely having to do with blood, and then chose the blood types least required for the week, and only took three at the most.

That seemed to pacify her, and she started smiling at me more.

She kept calling me 'Marge' whenever she approached me, which I didn't really approve of, but I wouldn't dare tell her not to.

The fact that she even called me at all was in and of itself a small miracle.

Giles? Giles and I had great times.

We had late nights together, either discussing what we were reading (we each averaged fourteen books a month) or debating the subject material of some fictional book, or researching supernatural occurrences; we always had a good time.

He even invited me into his home.

I don't have to be invited into a dwelling place in order to be able to enter, but it still was a great display of trust on his part.

Giles completely won my heart when he made me tea. Even if I couldn't taste the deliciousness that Giles did, warm, thick drinks let me pretend I'm drinking something more…satisfying. So I love tea. I would like coffee, but for some reason that doesn't sit well with my stomach.

Anyway, the shadow that I felt overhanging, however (aside from the Master, of course) was Angel.

I still couldn't figure out his part in all of this. I still hadn't told Buffy what he was. Nor could I bring myself to. It's one of those cliché things one falls into where one either tells a falsehood or neglects to convey an important piece of information, and then the longer that one says nothing, the harder it becomes to say something.

I do think I just made a run-on sentence.

Oh well. I sporadically employ the stream of consciousness method, so you'll have to bear with me, reader.

Well, now you know the spot I was in.

Angel still hadn't done anything particularly threatening, nor did he seem inclined to, but he just seemed so…involved with what was going on, I couldn't shake off that he knew even more than he let on. His 'mysterious' persona was bothering me.

And that name…where had I heard it before?

What made me feel even worse about my continued reticence was the fact that Buffy was obviously becoming more and more infatuated with him every time they met.

If something happened to her because of him…that would be my fault.

I followed Angel a few times, but every time he always just made his rounds on the town, didn't drink anyone, and went home.

I felt oddly disappointed by this. I had hoped for some sort of justification in being able to go to Buffy and reveal him for what he was, but nothing emerged.

For all intents and purposes, he was as well-behaved a young (or old) man one could hope for.

All of these puzzles put me in a rather sour mood, so I wasn't terribly talkative when Willow, Buffy and I went to the Bronze during the Fumigation Party, a rather disgusting ritual wherein free drinks were given for cockroaches caught and killed.

The usual clangor did nothing to improve my mood, either.

Willow explained to us it was an annual event to make up for the Bronze being closed for a few days for an actual cleaning. Or…de-bugging.

Buffy seemed as distracted as I was. Willow, bless her, tried to draw us out.

"It's a lot of fun." She insisted, when she couldn't get much of a response from Buffy. She noticed and gave a little smile.

"What's it like where you two are?" she asked. I looked up and gave her an answering smile as Buffy looked up in surprise at being caught.

"It's been a long couple of weeks." I explained.

"Sorry," Buffy said, "I was just thinking about things."

I nodded slowly.

"That's…generally what people think about, I suppose." I answered. She rolled her eyes at me. Willow was more savvy than I was at this.

"So, we're talking about a guy?" she guessed. I looked sharply at Buffy and felt my stomach churn in anxiety.

"Not exactly a guy," she answered, "for us to be talking about a guy there'd…actually have to be a guy. Was that a sentence?" Willow just smiled knowingly while I fidgeted uncomfortably.

"You're lacking a guy." She said.

"I am." Buffy acknowledged. "Which is fine with me, most of the time, but…"

"What about Angel?" Willow asked. I nearly groaned. Instead, I became suddenly very interested in the ceiling.

"Angel?" Buffy repeated, "I can see him in a relationship: 'Hi, honey, you're in grave danger! I'll see you next month.'"

I smirked at that and looked at Buffy. Maybe she was infatuated, but maybe that wouldn't mar her judgment after all?

"He's not around much, it's true." Willow said.

'Thank heaven for that.' I thought.

But Buffy was getting that tell-tale smile on her face that made my smile slip.

"When he is around," Buffy continued, "it's like the lights dim everywhere else. You know how it's like that with some guys?"

'Oh please don't wax poetic.' I thought.

"Oh yeah." Willow nodded. She gave a sigh and looked towards the dance floor. I followed her gaze but I already knew what, or rather who, she was looking at.

Xander was dancing like…well, I won't be rude. But he was trying to dance, anyway, and trying to approach attractive girls. Most of whom were taken or…Cordelia.

I think that's all I need say on that matter.

I saw them have a brief encounter, wherein neither of them looked particularly happy with each other, and afterward Xander hastily made his way over to our table with a disgruntled look on his face. When he stopped next to Buffy I saw Willow's eyes flicker with a momentary disappointed look.

Young love.

Oh how I loathe it.

"That Cordelia sure is a breath of vile air." He announced, "What're you vixens up to?" He looked down at my drink and gave an exasperated sigh.

"Water again?" he demanded. I shrugged and looked my still nearly-full glass.

"Why not?" I asked, "It's free, and I don't have to be disappointed by not being able to detect any fabulous taste everyone else raves about."

I still have bitter memories of not being able to enjoy a drink with Willow after she offered me a fragrant fruit drink. It smelled delectable, but was still bland to me.

"Well," Willow said, "we're mostly just sitting here. Watching our barren lives pass us by." She looked down at the ground.

"Oh look," she said, "a cockroach!" She stomped on it while Xander looked on and shook his head.

"Woah!" he said facetiously, "Let's stop this crazy whirligig of fun, I'm dizzy!"

"All right," Buffy said, sliding off her seat, "now I'm affecting those nearest and dear to me. I'm going to call it a night."

"Aw, don't go!" Willow insisted, though it was Xander who seemed the most eager for her to stay.

"Yeah, it's early! We could…um, dance?" he looked so hopeful, but I cringed at the thought of him 'dancing' again.

Mercifully, Buffy turned him down.

"Rain check?" she said. "Good night."

"Should I walk you home?" I offered, more than eager to get out of the hellhole of noise and obnoxious children that invaded my personal space and gave off the stench of hormones. Buffy shook her head.

"I'll be fine, thanks." She said, and then was gone.

Xander slid into her unoccupied seat with a sigh and looked at the table like a forlorn puppy.

Willow offered her shoe, with the dead roach still stuck to the bottom of it.

"Want a free drink?" she asked Xander. I shuddered and grabbed the shoe out of her hand and hastily wiped off the remains of the insect.

"There are some things," I told her, "a free drink is not worth. The smashed organs and blood of an insect is one of them."

I handed her back her shoe and rubbed my temples.

"I think it's time I took my leave as well," I said, "Giles invited me over and I think I could use the quiet." Willow gave me a sympathetic look and handed me my book bag, wherein I had the book Giles had let me borrow: The Complete Essay of Andrei Dropov, Vampire Historian.

We had both hoped to find out something further about the Master, or even some mention of half-vampires, but apparently we were a rare enough breed to where finding any mention of us whatsoever was nigh impossible.

I had already given up ever finding record of another one, but Giles was determined. I think he wanted to write his own chronicle about his interactions with one of my kind, but I think he wanted to have something to compare his experience with.

"Good night, children," I told them both, giving a small bow, "don't stay up too later." I started to walk away but then paused and turned back to them.

"Oh, and Xander?" I said. He looked up at me.

"You'd better walk Willow home." I told him.

"Oh, that's okay, I can look after myself." Willow insisted when Xander looked surprised. I waved her comment aside.
"Of that, I'm sure." I told her, "But it's the gentlemanly thing for him to do."

"Sure. I can do that." Xander nodded. I gave him an approving nod in return, and then took my leave, my mind already at Giles' home, where books, pleasant company, and tea awaited me.