Chapter Seventeen

Onward

He didn't go after her. Didn't want to. Despite how much his head told him to, he couldn't bring himself to want to. Let her go. The stubborn bitch. Bacchus started to pace the room now, furious with Cana and himself for letting her get under his skin. It was her idea to come in the first place damn it! He flexed his hands in and out of balled fists, fighting the urge to take his pent up anger out on the closest object, be it a wall or anything in his way. It's not my fault she invited herself to come along. Or that we ended up here, or that Mei was... His thoughts went to her then as he stopped and sat back down with his head in his hands.

He had been walking on his way back to check up on Cana at the bath hall when he saw her there in the garden, standing alone in the rain by the flowers. The ones he planted for her a lifetime ago no less. He had only wanted to talk to her. To be near her and talk to her, that was all. But when he was beside her and her eyes met his and she stepped closer… it all happened so quickly. He blinked and she was in his arms again as if time had not passed between them. As if they had never been apart. Just like back then.

He could still hear the soft way she cried after they kissed and told him how long she had waited for him to come back for her. How angry she was that he left her behind and how all that anger went away the moment she saw him again. He wiped her tears from her cheeks and held her close to him cradling her head against his shoulder and remembering how much he had longed to have her right where she was again for nearly a dozen years. He kissed the top of her head, keeping back his own tears while telling her how much he had missed her, how sorry he was to cause her such pain for so long and how foolish he was to leave her in the first place. He told her he was glad she married Shan and that she found happiness with him. What Mei said after that left him dazed and numb.

"I never wanted to marry him. I only did because Master asked me to, so that I might forget about you." There was a hesitation in her breath as she paused before going on. As if she were guilty to admit those feelings and the ones she later developed. "It took time, and I do love him and our son, Ang." She looked him straight in the eye with tears and rain streaming down her face then. "But he will never be the man that I chose. The man that I fell in love with first."

His head spun and his eyes felt hot. In that moment, he wanted nothing more than to take her with him and flee from Yi Kai back to Fiore or wherever they could and live out the rest of their lives together. Yet, as much as he had wanted to, he knew he couldn't. He couldn't do that to Shan or Zhuang, or Cana and most of all to Mei. So instead he pulled her lips to his and held her there so that the moment would burn into his memory. Reluctantly he told her she had to go back to her husband and son as he had to his wife. His gut wrenched itself in knots as he lied about his relationship with Cana and when he told her to forget about him and live the life she had built for herself and her family.

There was hurt in her eyes when he pulled her from his body, but she nodded in understanding. Her smile was sad yet warm, reminiscent of one she had given him over a decade before. His body ached through the numbness of his daze and he knew he was starting to shake. He had to leave her then, before he pulled her back against him and ran away with her.

"I will always love you Jian." She said to him as he turned to walk away. His chest nearly caved in and he had to force himself to keep going. It was the second time he had to turn his back to her and leave her that way. And as the first time he had done so, he shook violently as he left the garden. I can't look back any more. It's too late for us now. This will be the last time you ever have to hurt like this. I promise, Mei.

"You're afraid." Cana's voice echoed in his ear then. His fist clenched tightly as he opened his eyes, finding himself still in his room and the smell of jasmine fresh in the air. He had made his decision. She was right. He hated to admit it, even to himself, that she was right about his hesitance. But she didn't understand the situation like he did. Things had become more complex than he could have known it to be. He needed time to think, to plan.

Earlier at lunch with Shan and over the course of the past few days with him, he had learned more about the war going on. He learned it was Lady Lang's twin daughters, Fei Shi and Zi Yu, who had been the main forces behind the fighting and one of the reasons for their quarrel as well.

"She was second wife to the old emperor, but only gave him daughters." Shan informed him.

"Why don't they just marry? Are there no male cousins in the line?"

Shan had shaken his head. "All have been killed off one by one over the years by a radical group who aim to overthrow the whole monarchy all together so that we may become an independently ruled country. Merciless men who slaughtered even the bastard children of the concubines. That's what started the war to begin with. When they started to run out of suitors, they started fighting back. First they fought alongside one another, then eventually against, leaving nothing but ruin in their wake." He looked at his drink. "Cities and towns have been reduced to dust and rubble after a fight between them. There are often no survivors. Those that do make it, are hardly alive or abandoned their home when the first signs of an attack begin."

"What are they using to cause so much destruction?" Bacchus asked despite already knowing the answer. That was when Shan had paused, his concentration on the cup in his hand becoming more intense.

"Magic." He almost whispered.

"But magic has been banned for nearly thirty years, where could they have learned it?"

"Some say from traveling foreigners, others say that they practice in secret by learning from books or even traveling abroad themselves." He looked up at Bacchus then, something unsaid in his eyes.

"Why doesn't Shen Rau do anything? Or WaiPei? Surely the neighboring kingdoms are being affected by this."

Shan sipped his tea thoughtfully, a frown on his face. "It is said that the royal family and even some common people have reached out to the other nearby kingdoms, but none will risk their sons to the claws of the phoenix." His hand gripped tighter around his cup then. "And because of it, this country is being quickly torn apart by the reckless and thoughtless."

And I picked the best time to come. He thought bitterly to himself and brooded in the darkness of his room. A knock came at the door suddenly, pulling him from his thoughts. He had expected it to be Cana, but was surprised to see Mu standing there instead, telling him that dinner was ready. His gut sank and he thought of how long she had been gone where Cana might have run off. He quickly responded that his wife wasn't feeling well and that they would be late. The man did not question him and agreed to pass along the message.

Damn her. He went back to pacing the room. He knew that the rain would wash away the cover-up for his tattoos, leaving him little choice in going out to look for her. But staying in wasn't an option either.

I have to find her. He silently opened his door and slipped out into the hall and headed for the entrance of the school. Once out, he followed down the path leading into town. She couldn't have gotten too far. He had a difficult time believing himself as entered the streets. The evening was still early but the streets were empty due to the weather. There weren't many taverns or bars as she may have been accustomed to in Fiore, but he knew anywhere there was alcohol, she would find it and in turn, he would find her. At least she's predictable. He easily avoided people walking his way and slipped into the alleys, listening in on conversations as they walked by. No one mentioned a young woman of her description yet. Someone like her would be considered a monster here and there would be a crowd gathered.

On he looked until finally he had heard two women walking by talking about their fortunes.

"But she looked so serious. Like something bad was going to happen." One of them said. The other comforted her.

"What would she know? She's only a drunken reader. You shouldn't believe them anyway. And she's a foreigner no less."

"I suppose you're right."

Just as they said that, he went up behind them, covering their mouths so that they could not scream and asked them where they had seen the woman they spoke of. Though they struggled, they both pointed immediately.

"She was in Liu's shop. Please don't hurt us." One of them gasped as he let her speak.

"Good. Now run. And don't look back." He whispered as he released them and sent the women fleeing down the street. Having to scare two innocent women like that did little to uplift his still dark mood. I'm never going anywhere with this woman again. He vowed to himself as he walked through the shadows to the shop.

Sure enough, just as was said, there she sat at a low table, her hair undone and flying free around her face. The table was littered with bottles already, but left enough space for her cards to sit as she turned them over one by one for a young girl and her friend who sat across from her. When she pointed at a card she either shook her head or nodded to indicate if it was a good fortune or not. To the girl's horror, all the cards earned shakes from Cana's head and she stood up and ran out of the shop, he friend chasing after her.

He pulled the bonnet off his hair, letting the bun fall into a tail and took the cover-up from his pocket, quickly dabbing it on his face before he entered and sat in the corner. Luckily enough she was too drunk to notice him and went on with shuffling her cards.

"Buy her another drink." He heard a man from the table next to him say to a companion.

"You pay! She's already had eight! I don't know how she's still going." The companion complained. They were Fiorian men, but not the type who even Captain Wu would take aboard.

"Maybe this is the one that'll get her good and ready." The first one said.

Bacchus had to stop himself from going over and knocking the two of them out. This isn't going to end well. He ordered from the man who came to his table and sipped at the drink he was given and continued to watch her.

After a few minutes, the men from before got up to go sit with her, one on either side. She acknowledged them eagerly and spoke in Fiorian to them, asking if they were going to buy her yet another drink or take her back to Fiore. She had an arm around either of their shoulders and grinned when they said they would take her anywhere she wanted. The sight of it sparked something in him and he could feel himself having less control over his body.

"Another round!" She yelled out.

Though they didn't understand her words, the servers understood her actions and one of the serving women called out the same in Yikani for her. The meek looking girl brought them the next bottle and poured for them. The three drank up right away. Then, as she was reaching for the next drink, Cana's body leaned too far forward and she nearly smacked her head to the table. The two men grinned over her head at each other. When she leaned over to whisper into one of their ears, they only beamed more and stood up with her between them. His temper was starting to rise again. What is she planning?

Bacchus followed behind the trio in the shadows as Cana led the unsuspecting men into an alley the next block over. By the time he looked over from behind some crates, she was between them. The spark from before cracked inside him as he saw their hands groping her. Fury was boiling inside of him to see her in their grasps and instantly he went to charge. But as he leapt from his hiding space, there was a flash and the two men had suddenly dropped to the floor while she stood with a card in either hand. He was as stunned as she was when she looked up to see him standing there.

"What do you think you are doing?" His hands were still balled into fists.

"Getting myself home." She didn't even bat an eye as she crouched down to reach into the unconscious men's pockets and pulled their money from them.

"By seducing and robbing innocent men?" He accused.

"Believe me, they weren't innocent." The last word was heavily laced with venom as she stuffed the wads of jewel into her bag. "And what are you doing here anyway? You're done fucking Mei already?" She sneered at him as she stood. "Thought you would last a lot longer than that." Bacchus' anger still shook inside him, but he suppressed it despite her insults and the look she gave him. She had started to walk past him when he put a hand on her shoulder and turned her around to face him.

"Why are you doing this?" He demanded.

"Jealous?" She had quirked an eyebrow at him and glanced down at the two unconscious men on the ground before giving him another look and turning around to leave.

"Where are you going? Cana." Bacchus walked in front of her this time, blocking her path.

"Home. Now let me go." Her cocky smile had faded quickly when he continued to step into her way.

"You're drunk." He had grasped both of her shoulders now, resisting the urge to shake her.

"Thanks for noticing." She wrenched herself from his hands, pushing hard at his chest and became clearly frustrated when he still did not move.

"Cana." He was beginning to regret tracking her down.

"What." Her tone was harsh and through her glazed eyes, something burned.

Bacchus found he couldn't think of how to convince her to come back with him without telling her she had been right. He still had his pride, after all. When he said nothing, she tried once again to leave. Fed up with her attitude and of her in general, he simply grabbed hold and spun her before he hoisted her onto one shoulder as he had done to help her board Captain Wu's ship. Thankfully the quick action had made her dizzy enough that she could hardly put up a fight. And thankfully even through her inebriation, knew not to scream or cause a commotion.

When they reached the edge of town and the open field between the main village and the school, she had him put her down and walked beside him. He only permitted it as she complained she would retch all over him if he didn't. Bacchus was glad that he did when she ran off a few feet away to purge her gut only seconds after he put her down. The rain had let up for the night by then, allowing the clouds to thin and pass and some moonlight to shine through.

No one was around to greet them when they entered, letting them slip back into their room easily. She immediately went to the bed and lay down diagonally across it while he started shuffling with his bags, getting her attention enough to ask what he was doing.

"We're leaving. Get your things."

"To the palace? Now?" She squinted her eyes at him as he secured his belongings and started on hers. Realizing he meant what he said, she stood and walked over to the vanity where he was standing and leaned against it.

"Before or after?" She asked.

"Before or after what?" His body immediately tensed as he looked at her. He knew better than to answer her question, yet he did regardless hoping that she would ask about something important.

"Did you grow your balls before or after you fuc-"

He didn't hesitate this time to strike her. Aside from the crack of the back of his hand hitting her cheek, there was no sound from her. No yelp, no flinching, no swear or curse or shoe to be thrown. Her eyes said it all and so he let her tend to her own things silently. She quickly packed, throwing all of her things into her bag in a disorganized way and when she was done, they left.

The school wasn't far behind them still as he looked back at it from the top of the hill. He felt it was the last time he would ever see his home and those inside of it. A single light was still shining by a window and his body threatened to start shaking when he thought it might have been her, but he held tight to the bag on his shoulder and turned back around to continue on.

He and Cana trudged on through the open hills, the dim and fleeting moonlight their only way of seeing. Despite how much she had to drink and the two more times she purged along the way, she managed to keep up well enough and without complaint. It wasn't until after two hours of walking that she finally decided to say something.

"How many days is it until we get there?" Her breath was heavy as she spoke and there was sweat dripping down her brow.

"If we keep a good pace and if this weather will stay fair, hopefully only two days."

"And when we get there?"

"I don't know yet." He figured it wouldn't do either of them any good to lie and pretend to have a plan when they both knew he didn't. They were leaving much sooner than he would have liked to and without truly knowing much about anything they were getting themselves into. The two of them continued on for a few more minutes before she would say something else.

"Bacchus." She stopped behind him, but he kept on knowing what her softer tone meant. "About before…"

"Don't." He interrupted, though he didn't say it harshly. While he had calmed down from earlier and knew she was trying to apologize, he wasn't ready to talk to her yet. She didn't speak again even after they made camp around midnight.

They forewent a fire so as to not draw any attention to themselves. Even if they had wanted to, there wasn't any dry kindling or sticks to feed or start a fire. To keep warm, he gave her the small blanket he'd taken with him from the school and let her wrap herself in it. They had no food either and the landscape was severely lacking in edible plants, so they had to forego that for the night as well. The ground was still damp and cold, giving him little comfort as he sat beside a large rock and leaned against it.

Thoughts of Mei kept flashing in his head. From when they were in the garden just hours before, to the night he first left for Fiore, to when they were children playing in the streets and everything in between. He could feel how heavy his shoulders had become the more he thought about what she had told him about her and Shan's marriage. Master only wanted you two to be happy. But she must have heard that hundreds of times from others and had to convince herself of it. Though he was his best friend, he couldn't help but feel a new bitterness toward Shan for forcing marriage on her. He may have been pressured as well. But that was hard for him to believe. Shan would have asked even if Master didn't tell him to.

When he glanced over at Cana, he saw that she had already curled up and fallen asleep. The image of her and the two men in the alley came rushing back to him and stirred inside his chest once more. Something about seeing another man touching her had a strong effect on him, though he decided it was more for the fact that she didn't seem to have a problem with them doing as they pleased to her than the reason she allowed them to touch her for.

Bacchus eventually drifted off while sitting up against the boulder and woke to the subtle change in light as dawn came on. Cana had risen at the same time to his relief. It could have been due to the harsh sleeping condition he had to endure, but even after sleep, he found his mood was still mostly foul toward her and thought it best that he not speak much so as to avoid starting another quarrel. She seemed to come to the same conclusion and stayed quiet for the entire morning.

They were making better time than he had thought and by a little after midday, he could already see the line of trees at the small mountain base just off in the distance. He knew there was a stream running just on the other side of the trees that made him hasten his step.

"We'll rest when we get to those trees there." He said over his shoulder at her, pointing ahead. Cana gave no answer, keeping her stride up to match his.

The water was cold and clear and running smoothly. He quickly went to drink and splash his face with it; feeling instantly refreshed and exhausted simultaneously. His stomach wouldn't allow him to consume much of it, but he was grateful for something in his belly all the same. A fish big enough for both of them swam near and swiftly became their lunch. Cana used one of her cards to light fire to the dampened sticks alongside the small stream and cook their meal.

"The palace is just on the other side of the mountain. It should take us only a few hours to reach the village in the pass and another half day to descend." He said as he bit into his half of the roasted fish, picking out a bone from his mouth. She had yet to take a bite of her own half and was looking up at the mountain behind them.

"There will be more people along the way, and there's only one road, so we have to be careful about those we meet. It's a long climb, so I suggest you eat and get some rest as well. We'll leave at sundown." She continued to stare off and leave her food untouched. He wanted to bring up the night before and sort out their fight so that they might move on, but his pride was still too big to allow him to speak first.

"Are we just going to keep ignoring what happened last night?" She was looking at him now, almost bored. Bacchus looked up from his meal at her, waiting for her to continue. Putting his meal aside, he inhaled deeply and looked back at her.

"I shouldn't have hit you." He maintained their eye contact, sincerely apologizing, then broke off to finish eating.

"I shouldn't have said those things." Her even tone mimicked his.

"You were drunk." He shrugged while picking a few more bones from his mouth.

"After I said them. But then again, drunken words are sober thoughts right?" Her lips cracked a small smile. He let that sink in for a moment, pausing once more to look at her.

"And some times they're right." His small admission to her didn't do much to make him feel better, but he knew it would help to ease her. After a brief moment he shrugged again and they returned to their silence with her finally starting to eat.

As the evening drew near, he let her rest while he went in search of more provisions to carry up with them. There wasn't much other than the two other fish he managed to catch. He roasted them, wrapping them up in a cloth with the berries he'd also found and packed them into his bag.

They set off as the sun dipped down behind the mountain, traveling the winding uphill path. They had passed no one on their way up, making him suspicious of their trek. This was always such a busy road. Where has everyone gone?

Half the night had passed by the time they reached the small village perched off to the side of the path. And just beyond them, the gates to the royal city below stood tall in the darkness. Almost there. He could feel his body starting to tremble at the sight of the large wooden red gates. His palms tingled and sweat as the rest of his being begun to feel weaker. Almost.

A/N: Upload time! It's almost Friday anyway so here you have it folks! One brand new chapter coming right up!

After a few rereads and revisions, I still feel the pacing was a little rushed in this one. But I also didn't want to spend an entire chapter just hunting down Cana or a slow trudge through the land.

I want to say thanks again to all the viewers, readers, reviewers and followers for your support! You guys really are the best.

So hope you enjoyed yourselves this week and as always, until next Friday,

Betty B.