Oh my fucking God, forgive me! I am so sorry that it has been so long since I have updated this story! Please take this as my apology! Dear Lord, I don't deserve you precious souls who have stuck around this long.

In fact… Is anyone here?

*crickets*

Fuck. Oh, well. Here is the next chapter to 'This Hell I'm Living' anyways! Again, I'm so sorry!

Disclaimer: I do not own, or claim to own, anything associated with the Walking Dead. I just like playing around with it!

Chapter 21 (No specific POV)

It had been about a two weeks since Beth's miscarriage, and she was gradually starting to become herself again. On day three, she actually left her and Rick's room, much to his delight. Grant it, she looked like utter hell, but it was a start. Hershel had been attentive and checking on her body's progress of relieving the fetus, and thankfully there was no sign of infection or any other oddity.

On this particular day, Beth made her way out to the porch and was sitting on the rocker, humming to herself as she held Judith on her lap. Judith had actually been a very good therapy for Beth, considering she had a baby to take care of after all. As sad as she was that she lost her own flesh and blood, hopefully someday it will be safe enough for them to try again.

Until then; condoms. Condoms were the key.

The front door opened and Maggie came out, smiling softly at Beth as she sat next to her. "How you holdin' up?"

Beth shrugged and gave a weak smile in return, only it grew as Judy coo'd and gurgled happily on her lap. "I'm fine today. Judy is a good distraction. And even so, it is getting easier. Rick has been…" She let out a sigh. "He's my rock. I couldn't have asked for a better man, honestly."

Maggie chuckled and nodded. "Men are slim for pickin' these days, but I'm glad that we both seemed to have found a light at the end of the tunnel. I know that I didn't really approve of you and Rick at first, but he really loves you and makes you happy. What kind of sister would I be to keep you from your happiness? A pretty shitty one…"

Beth giggled and nodded. "I'd reckon so."

"Hey…" Maggie gave her a playful warning glare and nudged her with her elbow. "So what do you got planned for the day? Restin'?"

"Actually, I was going to go ask Rick if he would take me for a run. There are some…things I would like to acquire."

The brunette rose a brow and crossed her arms, looking at her curiously. "And? What would that be?"

"Personal stuff for Rick 'n I. Jesus, Maggie…"

Maggie let out a sigh and stood. "I'll go get 'em for ya." Then she kissed the crown of Beth's head and disappeared into the house.

The blonde sighed and turned her attention back to Judith, making silly faces at her just to make her laugh. It had to be Beth's favorite sound in the world… It was so cheerful and like music to her ears. Judy looked up at Beth with those big eyes of hers and uttered the words; "Mama?"

Beth gasped. Did…did Judy just say what she think she said? Her hear beat suddenly increased at a rapid pace and her eyes widened, just staring at the little girl.

Judith thought that it was all funny, so she giggled and clapped her hands, saying it again, more confident and loud than the last. "Mamma! Mamma!"

The sound of the front door shutting made Beth and Judith both jump, looking over to see Rick standing there with a look of pure surprise on his face.

Judith squealed and lifted her hands, grabbing at the air for her father. "Dadda! Dadda!"

Rick gathered himself together and slowly walked over, picking up his girl and cradling her in his arms.

His silence made Beth worry and she looked down at her hands. "I'm sorry… I didn't… I wasn't teaching her to say that. She just did… You can correct her if you want…"

The man was silent for another long moment before he sat down, looking to Judy as he pointed to Beth. "You're right, little girl. That's your mamma, and I'm your dadda." Beth's eyes widened and she looked up at Rick, seeing that he was completely serious. He looked at her with a warm and loving gaze for a while before speaking. "It is true, babe. You may not be her biological mother, but you have taken care of her since she was born. You are her mother…"

Beth bit her lip to swallow a happy sob that built up in her chest, not trusting her voice to answer so she simply nodded. Rick chuckled and leaned over, kissing her cheek sweetly then her lips, allowing them to linger. He then felt a sloppy pair of lips land right on his bearded cheek and he chuckled, pulling away from the kiss that he and Beth shared and looking at Judith. "Yes, little one, we know you're here. And yes, we love you too." He smiled fondly and placed a few little kisses on the babe's cheek, making her giggle loudly in response.

Beth still couldn't find any words to say, feeling the happiest she ever had in a long time. After watching Rick love on his daughter some more, she opened her mouth. "Could you and I maybe go on a run today? I have…something that I need to get. For us." She had a hopeful tone to her voice, trusting that Rick would understand just exactly what she was talking about…

And understand, he did.

Rick froze, turning to look at his lover slowly, his eyes sparking with that familiar look he would always give her. It made her shiver. "Beth…baby…are you sure you're ready for that? After what happened? We don't need to rush. If you want more time – "

"No." She interrupted him firmly, shaking her head once. "No, I'm ready. I miss you, Rick. I miss being with you…in every meaning of the word…" She paused, looking at him with adoration. "And you have been so good to me these past two weeks… I owe it to you."

"Beth, you don't owe me –"

She held up her hand to silence him. "I don't mean that in a bad way. I genuinely want to love on you, to thank you for everything that you have done. You have been so patient, now I want to return the favor. Please? We can go to that convenience store that's close by here…. I'm sure they have some condoms left. I know the walkers ain't usin' 'em." A small and playful smirk tugged on her pink lips.

Her pink, plush lips….

Rick couldn't stop staring at them. Truthfully, he missed her so much it ached. But he never pushed her, he hasn't even kissed her for two weeks! Not that that was all that was on his mind, however. He genuinely wanted to make sure that she was okay before they took any of those kinds of steps… And he wanted to give her body time to heal before they engaged in sexual acts.

He nodded, swallowing thickly to wet his suddenly desert dry throat. "Alright… We'll do that. I'm sure Carol won't mind keepin' an eye on Judy for a while. Shouldn't take us long to get those."

Beth nodded happily and kissed his lips full on for a second before pulling away. "I love you, so very much."

Rick groaned at the kiss, wishing that it could've lasted a bit longer… "I love you too, Bethy." He murmured softly, leaning over to press his forehead to his.

Later that afternoon, Carol agreed without hesitance to watch Judy and Carl while the two went on their run. Beth was currently in the passenger's seat as Rick drove, feeling more eager than ever.

"I feel like it's been forever since we have made love." She said blatantly, looking over at him with an anxious smile.

He let out a deep and throaty chuckle, nodding a bit as his gravelly voice sounded. "Trust me when I say, I feel the exact same way."

Beth giggled and leaned over, placing a firm kiss on his cheek. "You know that we'll have to wait until tonight to…" She cleared her throat presumptuously. "I don't want to do it when everyone is awake… It would just feel weird because they'll know what we're doing…"

Rick couldn't help but chuckle at her words, nodding another time. "Perhaps we can take advantage of our time alone at the convenience store?"

Beth blushed and swatted his arm playfully. "Rick, you know that's not safe…"

"It wouldn't be the first time."

"I know. But we could get too distracted –"

"And you'll scream my name too loud, alerting the – "

"Shut up!" She giggled wildly and hit his arm just a tad harder this time, shaking her head. "You are naughty."

"You are just as naughty as I am, sweetheart."

A deep blush covered her cheeks and she giggled. He was right, of course. They were both equally as bad…
Just send them to hell in a handbasket together.

Rick parked the car in front of the store and looked at her expectantly. "Ready?"

"Ready."

Yay! I got a chapter done! I know its short but, it's something, right? I have a huge muse for these two al of the sudden, so hopefully this won't be the only chapter that I'll be posting. In the meantime, if any of you lovelies are out there, reviews would be so much appreciated! Love you, awesome nerds!