Giles knew something was amiss when I came into the library, but bless him he didn't inquire about it. I suppose I must have looked distraught enough and haunted enough to warrant bypassing an interrogation this time.

I really couldn't bring myself to talk about Jack again, not even to Giles. To be honest, I was shocked at myself for having divulged to Willow as much as I did. I hadn't thought or wanted to think about Jack in a long time. It hurt too much.

He had just been so…youthful. And when I saw him, when they had collected his body from the shore and brought him to us at the little medical station we'd set up…it was just too hard. What hurt the most was the fact that they hadn't bothered to close his eyes.

And the look on his face…

He'd looked twice as young in death. Those blue eyes, clouded and gray for the first time, and his expression had just been so heart-breaking. He looked like a lost, confused little boy, even with the blood matted in his hair and dried on his face.

He looked…terrified.

I had never seen him scared before, and seeing that on him in death….well, perhaps you can understand why I had tried not to think of him for so long?

Giles simply murmured to me that he had some books to put back in the science fiction section, and handed me one of the stacks in question. I didn't say anything, I couldn't bring myself to speak just yet. I was still too rattled.

He just let me work in silence, but I could feel him watching me, studying me. At first I worried that perhaps he was worrying I was having an episode of blood lust and was trying to distract myself, but a look at his face told me otherwise.

He wasn't worried about the monster side of me, he was just worried about me, myself.

It was rather sweet.

We worked that way for an hour or so, until Buffy came in and told Giles all about Willow's lateness, Malcolm, how bizarre she was acting; everything.

I came down from the science-fiction section, and Giles shot me an inquisitive look while Buffy prattled on. I just shrugged and raised my hands in a helpless gesture.

"She is acting a little…different." I admitted, when Buffy finally paused for breath.

"Different how?" He asked, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

"Well…unlike Willow." I said with another shrug.

"And it's not just Willow," Buffy continued, "David, Franz, they're ALL wicked jumpy."

"Well, those boys aren't sparklingly normal as it is." Giles said with a faint smile. I gave him a look and answered his smile with a smirk of my own.

"You do realize we're having a discussion betwixt a Watcher, a Slayer, and a half-vampire?" I reminded him. "We're not precisely 'sparklingly normal' either, sir."

Buffy gave a giggle, but became serious again and looked at Giles beseechingly.

"Giles, you have to trust me on this." She begged.

"I do," Giles insisted, "but I really don't know how to advise you. Things involved with a computer fill me with a child-like terror."

I couldn't help but giggle at that.

"Giles, I really must give you a beginner's course." I told him, "You might like it after all."

He stared at me for so long I thought he'd forgotten how to blink.

"Don't even tease about that." He warned me. I smothered another laugh and instead nodded solemnly.

He turned back to Buffy and sighed, trying to be helpful but coming up blank.

"Well," he finally said, "I, uh, suppose you could tail Dave and see if that leads to something." He suggested.

"Follow Dave." Buffy repeated with a smirk, "What, with dark glasses and a trench coat? Please. I can work this out myself." She sounded surprisingly cheerful and confident about that last part. I raised an eyebrow at her. She wasn't fooling me, she hadn't any better ideas.

"Let me know if you want me to track him." I offered, feeling I might as well have a part in this if we were going to be so protective of Willow and her school attendance record. Buffy waved me off, however, much to my relief.

"I got this." She insisted with a wink, "Thanks for the offer though."

"Any time, Slayer." I said, but inwardly I breathed a sigh of relief. All I wanted to do after school was go home, sit in the quiet for a very long time, have some blood, and try and push the memories of Jack back into their little boxes in the back of my mind.

Of course, any hope of a quiet evening in was naturally dashed by the afternoon, because Buffy brought Xander back into the library and informed us she had followed Giles advice and tailed Dave to a warehouse, and had seen something very peculiar indeed.

"Whatever Dave is into, it's large." Buffy said quietly, thinking about all the possible explanations she could, though of course none of them seemed feasible. I could see that just from her expression.

"What was the name of this place?" Giles asked. He had taken off his glasses and was slowly pacing around the room. One could always tell he was thinking hard when he took off his glasses.

"It said 'C.R.D.'" Buffy answered with a frown, "But I couldn't get close enough to see what it was."

"Calax Research and Development," Xander surprised us by saying, "It's a computer research lab, third largest employer in Sunnydale til it closed down last year."

The room became very quiet as we stared at him.

"What, I can't have information sometimes?" he asked.

"Well done, lad." I laughed, patting him on the shoulder, "Wonders never cease, it appears." He rolled his eyes and shrugged off my hand but I could see he was pleased by the little smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"Well, it's just…somewhat unprecedented." Giles explained, putting his glasses back on.

"My uncle used to work there," Xander explained, "In a…floor-sweeping capacity."

"An often thankless, but imperative occupation." I assured him with a solemn nod.

"But it closed?" Buffy asked.

Xander nodded.

Buffy shook her head. "It looked pretty functional from where I stood. I mean, I don't have a clue as to what they were doing…"

"Yeah, and what do they need Dave for?" Xander asked quietly.

I sighed and rubbed my forehead tiredly.

"I daresay if we start keeping a list of things we don't have answers for, we'd have a list thick enough to pose as the Bible." I said. Then I looked at the gathered group.

"Obviously it has to have something to do with computers. Young Dave has shown his particular aptitude for that field, so perhaps he's better than we thought?" Giles looked doubtful as I said that.

"There is the possibility, based on the lack of information we have, that whatever is going on there is on the up-and-up." He suggested.

"The what?" I asked, frowning in puzzlement. I had heard that expression before but I never failed to confuse me.

"Oh, the up-and-up? It…uh, well it means it may be…on the level? Or, you know, legitimate?"

"Ah," I nodded, understanding, "thank you." How on earth the term up-and-up came to mean the same thing as legitimate I'll never know. I had a feeling it may have come from the 20's. There were many ridiculous sayings then.

For instance, why on earth did they think it didn't sound ridiculous to say 'Twenty-three skidoo'? What on earth is a skidoo?!

Apologies, I digress.

"That could be, but I don't think so." Xander answered Giles' thought. "If C.R.D. had opened, it'd be on the news."

"Besides," Buffy continued, "I know something is wrong." She looked up at Giles with a mischievous glint, "My spider-sense is tingling."

"You're…spider-sense?" Giles asked incredulously.

"Spider-Man." I said proudly. I nodded at Buffy. "That one I know."

Giles rolled his eyes at me.

"Yes, well," he began, "I think we're still at a stand-still. Short of breaking into the place, I don't see how-"

But he'd already inadvertently said the magic words.

"Breaking in!" Buffy bubbled, pushing herself off of the table she'd been sitting on, "Then this is the plan!"

Xander grinned at her enthusiasm.

"I'm free tonight!" he announced. They looked inquiringly at me.

Well, this was as good a distraction from Jack as sitting in the dark, reading would have been. I really didn't have an excuse, did I?

"I…don't have plans anymore." I said. Buffy grinned and gave me a playful punch in the shoulder.

"Ata girl, Marge." She said, "Okay, so, tonight it is, then!" She started to bounce off when Giles, ever the group's conscientious advisor, halted her exit.

I caught a whiff of something in the air and frowned, turning towards the library doors as I do so. Someone was coming.

"A moment, please, of quiet reflection." Giles begged. "I do not suggest that you illegally enter the-" I flashed him a warning look and shook my head, just as the doors opened and Ms. Calendar came in.

"-data, into the file," Giles quickly amended, "so the book will be listed by title as well as author."

I nodded in understanding and leaned a little closer.

"Very nicely done, Rupert." I whispered while Buffy and Xander looked confused.

"I, uh, just came by to check your new database, make sure your cross-reference table isn't glitching," She said. Buffy and Xander whirled around, startled, while Giles's face contorted into the usual impatient, long-suffering expression he wore whenever computers were mentioned.

Ms. Calendar crossed the room and stopped just across from Giles, as though it were a face-off.

"Because I'm guessing you haven't gone anywhere near it?" she finished.

Giles frowned in wounded pride and crossed his arms. I did the same.

"I'm still sorting through the chaos you left behind you." He defended himself. I felt compelled to reinforce his argument.

"The books weren't even separated by category," I mentioned, "the process is taking much longer than expected."

She blinked at me in confusion, and I realized she'd already forgotten my name. I pretended not to take notice. Then she looked at Buffy and Xander and her frown deepened.

"Uh, you three are here again?" she asked. "You kids really dig the library, huh?"

"A good bit, yes." I acknowledged.

"We're literary!" Buffy shrugged.

"Uh, to read makes our speak-y English good." Xander said. I looked at him in dismay, and Buffy quickly took the hint.

"We'll be going now." She said, grabbing hold of Xander and pulling him towards the door.

"Well, we'll continue this conversation at another time." Giles said, giving Buffy a serious look.

"I think we're done." Buffy replied, then looked at me, "We still on for tonight?" she asked. I cast an apologetic glance at Giles, and then nodded.

"Of course, dear." I answered. Buffy nodded, pleased. She gave Giles one last look, as though to say: "I told you so." And then beat a hasty retreat with Xander in tow. Giles looked at me and sighed heavily.

"I'm not letting her go with only Xander." I whispered at him, "As well-meaning as he may be, if something happens Buffy can't be the only one to fight."

Giles hesitated, then nodded, his shoulders slumping in defeat.

"All right, let's take a look, then." Ms. Calendar was saying. Giles grimaced and I quickly covered another smirk threatening to rise to the surface. I started to follow Buffy and Xander when Giles caught my wrist.

"Please," he whispered, "for the love of all that is good and pure, don't leave me alone with that dreadful woman."

I glanced a Ms. Calendar, but she was typing away on the computer and didn't seem to notice our exchange.

I looked up at him and those pitiful, pleading gray eyes. If I had said no it would have felt like murdering a kitten.

"I'll be close by." I assured him, prying free of his grip and gathering up a stack of books. He sighed in relief.

"Thank you." He murmured. I patted his shoulder consolingly.

"Just think ahead," I advised him, "Pretend you're already at home and all of this is behind you."

"Don't tempt me," he whispered back, "I may just leave anyway."

"Courage, dear, courage." I whispered, then cleared my throat and stepped around him.

"I'll start with the biographical section then, shall I?" I said loudly. Giles nodded and reluctantly moved towards Ms. Calendar.

"That will be fine, Margery, thank you." He said. I mounted the steps and moved towards the desired section, pausing to glance back. Giles staid just out of arms-reach, as though he thought Ms. Calendar may try and make him touch the computer.

Dear Giles, after all the things we've faced, the thing he fears the most is a computer.