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- You fucking kidding, right?
- No. - I said. – I'll stay. I'll provide for you. I'll do anything you want. Just let me have this one thing for me as part of our deal.
- Do anything huh? - Negan asked and I could already see that tricky smile of his coming around.
- Anything. – I could only hope that before I had to do the "anything" part, I would be long gone. Possibly with Daryl on my side.
- You're something else you know. And what the hell…I'm even considering this bullshit thing you want.
- Just give me five minutes with him. Please.
- Five fucking minutes every single fucking day? Oh come on darling…. - He was now giving his full attention to me as he stared at me with a look that suggested he's not quite happy with this. I had to say more. I had to sacrifice the last string of my sanity. And I was willing to do that. For Daryl.
- Just give me five minutes with him today…and then…I'm yours.
Long silence. Maybe too long. Maybe he was already thinking about how to make me suffer after I sell my soul to him. Maybe he knew I was lying about the 'I'm yours' part. Maybe he knew that I was lying to him the whole time. About Everything. Well not everything. I did work for the government. I just let the part of me being an agent and killing people for money a secret.
- Five minutes. And the you're fucking mine.
Negan told Dwight to take me to Daryl's cell, but he also made sure to pick up his beloved Lucille and follow close behind. I tried to memorise everything about this place. The corridors were dark and unfortunately very similar to each other. I needed to focus on the little details like scratches on the walls and decaying ceilings.
Dwight stopped me in the middle of one of the corridors and waited for Negan to catch up with us. He was whistling a song while swinging his baseball bat from side to side. He looked like a happy man with no problems or regrets at all in the world. I hated it. I wanted to hate it so much, but a part of me was still fascinated by his charisma. I started to realize that this kind of charisma was even more dangerous then brutality. He looked like a man, who did what he had to do. For a while I thought it was a good thing. Rick did what he had to do. And now, he was just the shadow of the man I used to know. Hell, I was a shadow too.
- Five minutes. – He whispered with a Cheshire cat smile as he stood just inches away from me. I nodded and he turned to Dwight. – Bring her back when she's done with…. the hell is his name?
- Daryl. – Dwight said while opening the door.
- Yeah…whatever. – And off he went.
I was nervous. A few seconds ago I knew what I wanted to tell him. And now, I was freaking out. I stepped into the darkness of the room and immediately saw him standing close to the wall with such fear in his eyes that I have never seen before. For a short second we just starred at each other trying to process this moment and to keep it together. Then I was already in his arms, clinging to him. I never wanted to let go. I felt my tears coming down on my cheek as I leaned into his embrace even more.
- You okay? – was the first thing he asked. Daryl back off a bit to have look at me and gently put his forehead onto mine.
- I'm fine. – I said as my hands travelled all over his body to make sure that he was okay. – I'm going to find a way to get us out of here Daryl. I promise.
- What does he want with you? – there was so much concern in his eyes, and I felt like the shittiest person because I knew he was suffering and I couldn't do anything about it. Yet.
- It doesn't matter. I can handle him. – I looked away for a split second and I was sick. – Is this what they feed you with? Dog food? I'm going to…
- No! You're not going to do anything stupid or reckless, you hear me? – He put his hands on my cheeks to make me look him in the eyes. – He's nothing like the Governor or Terminus, you can't just act tough and run around with guns! You shouldn't have come here either.
- I won't. But what was I supposed to do? Let Negan beat the shit out of Olivia or someone else from our group? I had to do something! I couldn't just sit and watch you suffer…. Daryl, I need you to understand that whatever is going to happen here, I will try my best to get us out of this place.
- What do you mean by that? What did he do to you?
- Nothing. - Daryl sighed and I put my arms around his neck, holding him close. – I only have five minutes with you. I wanted to make sure that you were okay. I know you're not. And I'm a fool for saying this, but I'm really glad that I'm here. Because this way at least I know that you're here, with me.
- We'll figure something out, Grace. We always do. Just promise me you won't do anything without thinking it through. – He kissed my forehead and continued. – I trust you. Do what you have to do, but be careful with Negan.
- I will. – I simply said those two words before kissing him gently on the mouth.
And then it was all gone. Dwight literally dragged me out of the cell and threw me to the wall while he locked Daryl's door.
- Funny how fast time goes by, right? – He asked rather for his own amusement to see me angry, and put his hand on my upper arm to probably drag me back to Negan.
Negan was like the devil, and I was about to seal the deal with him. I was on my way to hell.
