A/N: Because nothing can ever be easy... Oh, and the next few udates should be in blocks of 2 chapters at a time, just to give you the heads' up...
Daughter of My Heart, Chapter Thirty
Sam breathed a sigh of relief as Janet and Daniel pulled away from the house. She was glad Cassie had been able to carry the conversation, because she really hadn't felt capable of saying anything useful all night.
"He was interested in the books," Cassie reported triumphantly. Sam smiled.
"I heard," she said.
"That's a good sign, right? That he's still interested in the same things?"
"Probably," Sam agreed.
"Are you all right?," Cassie asked. Sam sighed, moving back into the living room. Cassie followed.
"I'm...fine. I just feel odd with him around, now, that's all."
"Do you still love him?," Cassie asked, worried.
"I still love who he was," Sam replied sadly. "I'm just not sure he'll ever be that person again."
"Neither is he," Cassie said, sitting down.
"He told you that?," Sam asked, surprised. Cassie nodded.
"He said he hasn't remembered anything in two months. He's not really sure he can."
Sam closed her eyes. As hard as this was for her, it must be just as bad, if not worse, for him. "The books were a good idea," she said at last. "Daniel always loved his books."
Cassie smiled. "I think he'll really like the ones I picked out for him. They're all about ancient Egypt. I gave him a stack of documentaries too, some of his favourites from before."
"I'm sure he'll love that," Sam replied. "You're a good kid, you know that?," she said, pulling Cassie close for a hug.
"I have good parents," she said, making Sam smile. She kissed the top of Cassie's head.
"Glad you think so."
Janet had brought him back to his quarters on base, leaving him there before heading back to her own home. The drab grey walls felt even more devoid of life now that he'd seen his home, and all the life and energy it contained. In the end, the girl had sent him away with the four books she'd chosen, plus a number of what she called 'DVDs', and promised that either Jack or Teal'c would be able to show him how to use them. He was invited to dinner again in three days, on Friday. He was looking forward to talking with his daughter again.
Depositing the new items on the desk, he took off his shoes. He felt exhausted now that the first meeting was over with, however pleasant it may have been, and he stretched out on the bed to rest.
There was a quick knock at the door.
"Who is it?," he called, not wanting to get up.
"Jonas Quinn, Doctor Jackson." Daniel groaned. "Come in," he said, sitting up.
"I'm sorry to bother you, doctor, but I was wondering if I could run something by you."
"I really don't think it'll do you much good," he replied, shrugging. "I still haven't remembered a thing."
"Yes, but you were an ascended being for over a year, and I'm hoping that maybe your latent knowledge of the Ancient language will be able to help me decipher this tablet."
He groaned. "Look, Jonas. It's been a long day. Can we just assume my latent knowledge is about as accessible as all the rest of my life, and leave it at that?"
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come," he said, attempting retreat.
"I don't mind the company," he clarified. "I just don't need the questions."
"Fair enough," Jonas said, stepping back inside. "Catching up on some reading?," he asked, noting the books.
"Uh, yes," he replied. "My daughter thought I might like them."
"You should," Jonas said. "They follow some of your earliest research."
"They do?"
"Yeah. I mean, you didn't just postulate that the pyramids of Egypt were landing pads for alien spacecraft. You actually traced the Goa'uld influence throughout Egyptian history, before we even knew who the Goa'uld were. This book here, referencing the Amarna period...You'd theorized that Akhenaten was not, in fact, a heretical king, but a revolutionary of sorts. He overthrew the ideas of the alien cult worship, and gave his people something new to believe in. Something purely Egyptian."
"That's funny. My daughter was reading another book about him. It sounded fascinating."
"It is," Jonas agreed heartily. "You know, if you're interested in reviewing some of your older research, I think there are copies in you office here on base. I could bring them to you sometime."
"That would be...that would be great. Thank you, Jonas."
"Not a problem. And hey, if you ever want to try your hand at some translations, you know where to find me."
"Actually, I don't," he confessed.
"Uh, Level 18, Corridor C, room 225."
"I'll remember that," he said.
"Well, I should probably get back to this," Jonas said, waving the tablet. "Have a good night, Doctor Jackson."
"You too," he said, as the door closed behind his guest.
Picking up the first book his daughter had given him, he started to read. No harm in learning some of the stuff I'm already supposed to know, he reasoned.
The air was hot and dry, a sweltering breeze stirring grit into his eyes. He raised his arms protectively, shielding his face. Through the noonday haze and the swirling sand he could just make out a shelter on the horizon, a squat stone edifice burning white under the fiery force of the desert sun. His feet slipped and slid in the loose terrain, groping ineffectually for purchase as he desperately fought his way toward the building.
Summoning the last of his strength, he pushed through the wooden doors, stepping into the cool shade of the interior. He stumbled and fell against the solid stone floor, his face pressed painfully into the rough surface. He couldn't move.
"Rise," a voice commanded, feminine, powerful.
"I can't," he gasped, trying to see the speaker. She was just out of sight, incapable as he was to turn his head.
"Those words are not fit for a warrior," she scorned.
"I am a scholar, a man of wisdom; not a warrior," he corrected hoarsely.
"Impossible!," the voice proclaimed. "Your deeds prove the lie in your words."
"What deeds?," he questioned, struggling to lift his head, to see.
"You are the slayer of Ra," she intoned. "The undoing of Anubis."
"I had help," he said.
"You have fought many battles."
"Not by choice."
"It was your choice to raise arms in defense of Cassandra."
He blinked, memory filtering hazily through his mind. A girl, dying in a hospital bed. A Goa'uld with the ability to heal her.
"My daughter?," he asked, although he already knew the answer.
"Rise, Daniel Jackson," the voice commanded, more gently this time.
He felt his muscles loosen and pushed himself up, clambering unsteadily to his feet. "Who are you?," he asked, facing at last the shrouded figure of his companion.
"I am a part of you," she said, revealing her face.
Daniel woke with a start, the heavy book sliding gracelessly from his chest onto the floor. Cassandra. The girl's name, his daughter's name, was Cassandra. Cassie. He remembered. If nothing else, he remembered that. Quickly stuffing his feet into a pair of standard-issue boots, he threw open his door, hightailing it up the hall to Teal'c's quarters.
He knocked once, twice. Teal'c opened the door, utterly unruffled despite the late hour. "Daniel Jackson. How may I be of assistance?," he asked, gesturing the other man inside.
"I remembered something," he explained excitedly. "My daughter's name. My daughter's name is Cassandra."
"That is correct, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c replied, smiling.
"Nobody would tell me, but then I had this dream, and I just knew. I saved her from a Goa'uld?," he asked, looking to Teal'c for confirmation.
"Indeed," Teal'c replied, inclining his head. "It was you who threatened Nirti's life should she choose to ignore the plight of your daughter. You were most persuasive."
"I have to tell Sam," he said, realization dawning.
"Major Carter will not return to base until 0800 hours, Daniel Jackson. I would advise you rest until then."
"Do you think she'll be happy?," he asked uncertainly. "I mean, with everything that's happened between us...would she still want to know?"
"I believe Major Carter will be most pleased by this development," Teal'c replied calmly.
"Do you think she'd let me talk to Cassandra? I mean, we have a dinner scheduled for Friday, but I'd like to tell her before then..."
Teal'c smiled patiently. "I cannot speak for Major Carter, Daniel Jackson. You must ask her yourself in the morning."
"Right. Well, uh, sorry to wake you. I just...I just really wanted to tell someone."
Teal'c nodded, a small smile still gracing his features. "Goodnight, Daniel Jackson."
"Goodnight, Teal'c," he replied, returning to his room. Four hours...
Sam flipped the lights on, setting her coffee down on the table. She had reports to finish for three separate briefings today, and simulations to run on the artifact brought back by SG-12. Letting out a breath, she took her seat, switching her computer on and waiting for it to boot.
There was a knock at her door. Sighing resignedly, she rose to answer, wishing not for the first time that flying a desk could come with a few less interruptions.
"Hi," Daniel greeted her, smiling.
"Daniel," she said, startled, gesturing him inside. "What can I do for you?"
"Um, nothing," Daniel replied. "I just wanted to say that I did it: I remembered something."
"You did?," she asked, curious. She tried to tamp down the hope that followed, not wanting to be disappointed. "What did you remember?"
"Well, I had this dream, and in it, this woman I couldn't see was listing Goa'uld I helped to destroy. I remembered what happened with Ra, and Anubis, but then...then I remembered Nirti."
"Nirti?," she asked, not quite following his excitement.
"Sam, I remembered challenging Nirti to save Cassandra."
Sam's breath caught at his use of their daughter's name. Did he realize...?
Before she could finish the thought, he continued. "And that was the most amazing thing of all. I remembered her name, Sam. I remembered Cassandra's name," he finished triumphantly.
Sam stared at him, heart constricting in her chest. She wanted to hug him, to celebrate with him, to feel his arms around her once more, warm breath on her neck. She wanted so badly to believe that he really was back, that he really was hers, and yet... And yet. "That's great," she managed, swallowing the lump in her throat. "That's really great, Daniel."
His eyes dulled at her response, shoulders slumping ever so slightly. "Look, Sam. Janet told me what happened between us, why things are so complicated...I...," he sighed, searching for words. "I'm really sorry things ended the way they did. If I could change things..."
"Would you?," she asked quietly. "Because the Daniel I knew wouldn't. Once he'd made his choice he'd stand by it, whatever the cost."
"See, in this instance, that doesn't sound very honourable to me," he said, smiling humourlessly.
"You don't know him."
"As far as everyone else around here is concerned, I am him."
Sam shook her head. "I'm sorry, Daniel, but you're not." She shrugged. "You look like him. You sound like him. Hell, you even smell like him. But you're not the Daniel I knew. I'm honestly not sure you ever could be." That hit home, and he winced, hands burrowing deep into his BDU pockets.
"I've started to remember, Sam. Give me a chance. Please."
Sam shook her head, tears threatening to spill. "God, you really just don't get it, do you?," she asked, angry. "I did everything I could to save you. I pulled every string at my disposal. And in the end, you chose to ascend. You don't get another chance, Daniel. Even if you remember absolutely everything, you still won't get another chance. Not from me."
"Sam," he pleaded, struck.
"Get out," she growled. Mercifully, he obeyed. As the door clicked softly shut, she sank down to the floor, tears spilling noiselessly down her face.