A/N: Chapter nine for an update. Not entirely fluffy. You've been adequately warned.
You're the One
9. bedside manner
There came a dark time when they'd inexplicably lost her.
Not in the same way like when it was her father that had been involved. No, this was a different kind of loss.
The way Beast Boy justified it was that, at least with an impending apocalypse, there would be nothing left; nobody at all would survive. Whereas, when Raven was about to fade away from their world for good, time would continue to move forward, only without her. In his mind, this was a far worse fate to be subjected to than that of the one of Trigon.
He couldn't bare the thought of losing anymore teammates, not ever again, not after everything with Terra. That had done enough irreparable, emotional damage to his heart, and he didn't think he could survive yet another critical blow.
The remaining Titans had thought that they'd shown up just in the nick of time, and that it could have very well made the difference between life and death for the empath. They'd fended off Slade and his bots long enough to pick up her limp body and make a hasty retreat to the tower for a recoup. In that moment, they hadn't realized just how dire the situation had been; Raven wasn't even levitating.
Cyborg didn't waste a second; he had her in the medbay in moments, with Starfire, Robin, and Beast Boy fast on his heels. They moved about knowingly, each perfectly understanding the instrumental part they needed to play to secure their decommissioned teammate. In moments, she was hooked up to monitors and machines, even an IV drip and oxygen, while Cyborg monitored her status with intense concentration. Once all that could be done was in fact done, the Teen Titans could do nothing more but watch and wait with bated breath. Only, Raven's condition did not improve, no matter their interventions and skills.
Beast Boy swallowed back the panic, like the acidic bile in his throat, when he'd noted that even her own healing factor hadn't managed to kick in yet. He tried not to look directly at her wounds, and her face was a blurred image in his mind, as if his own consciousness was trying to protect him from the gut wrenching truth.
Minutes turned to hours, and eventually, the team had started to nod off, Starfire softly dozing, nestled up against Robin's shoulder as he stroked her hair tenderly. Cyborg's batteries were dying, and his blue lights had been flashing red for the past couple of minutes in warning. Only Beast Boy stayed vigil.
Titans East had been dispatched to deal with Slade and his friends in the mean time, and it had seemed that Bumblebee's team had made significant progress when Robin had checked his comms at some point in the night. Beast Boy couldn't bring himself to pay attention to them, not when his mind was so preoccupied with other, more urgent concerns. Yet their leader had taken that as his queue to turn in for the night, so long as Raven's condition seemed to be unchanging. He carefully carried a sleeping Starfire out of the medbay, while Cyborg tinkered with his control panel to see if he could run off some more juice by powering down other parts of his system.
"Go recharge, I got this," Beast Boy commanded him, his voice betraying no emotion.
His friend gave him a concerning stare. "This is serious stuff, Beast Boy. Anything changes, anything at all, you have to know what to do," he told him sternly.
"I know that. If anything happens, I'll set off the alarms. The state of emergency should wake you up instantly. Now go," Beast Boy tried again, his tired eyes never leaving the sight of Raven's still form, unconscious and unresponsive to all around her.
The inflection in the changeling's voice seemed to convince Cyborg that his typically silly, pragmatic teammate was taking this matter extremely seriously, and that there would be very little room for argument. There was no hint of humour, no light-hearted smile, not even a crack at a bad joke this time.
Cyborg nodded once, albeit hesitantly, before taking his leave for the night. He gave his friend's tense, hunched over back one last lingering look of pitying worry before disappearing just beyond the doorway.
Raven didn't move. She didn't blink, she didn't so much as flinch. The machines beeped and hummed, the only sign that she was still being kept alive. Beast Boy pretended not to see the blood, to see the bandages and the wounds, the used gloves and the gauze sitting stained in the yellow biohazard bag, the stains on his own hands and clothes. He zoned it all out, like an unpleasant sense he refused to acknowledge. Instead, he stayed at her side, waiting for her to wake up, staring at the pallor of her cold fingers and itching to hold her hand. Mostly, he spent the hours talking to her, hoping he could simply annoy her into consciousness, but even he eventually grew bored with a one-sided conversation.
He thought about bringing in a comic book, or a portable gaming station, but both seemed like selfish, bad ideas that would only detract from his duty. Also, he was terrified of leaving her side, even for such a short period of time. He didn't want to miss a beat, couldn't miss a beat. Her life could depend on it, and if ever there was a moment where he knew he shouldn't let her down, this was the one.
So, he sat in his chair, and allowed his eyes to roam about the room, looking everywhere but at her, and trying to preoccupy his mind with less desolate thoughts. That was when he spotted it across the way, like an item that did not belong. It stuck out like a sore thumb.
On the table, by the chair that faced all the fancy, flat screen monitors, Raven had left behind one of her books.
Just before they had received the emergency call regarding Slade's attack on the City, Cyborg had been performing routine check ups on the Titans, and Raven just happened to be next in the pecking order. While waiting, she'd brought in a book to read to help kill the time as Cyborg prepped his tech anew. The memory felt like a decade ago, and the offensive item almost tricked Beast Boy into thinking that nothing had changed at all; that Raven would glide in, say something in regards to his sleep deprived state, grab her book, and disappear into her bedroom for the night.
Except, of course, that she wouldn't.
So, instead, Beast Boy moved towards it, drawn like a magnet to one of the very last things Raven had touched. He picked up the novel, inspecting it all over as if to find traces of her on it somehow. The cover was soft, a little beat up from use, and was quite hefty with its pages. The title read THE COUNT OF MONTE CRISTO, written by some dude named Alexandre Dumas. Beast Boy skimmed through the musty, old pages before giving up and reading the back for a brief summary. That was when Raven's bookmark slipped out from within the pages, landing on the cold, tiled floor before his feet.
"Shit!" He cursed aloud, realizing too late the magnitude of what he'd done. He'd just lost her spot in the massive book; a crime if there ever was one in Raven's mind.
She was going to have his head for it when she noticed. He picked up the thin, laminated piece of cardboard from the floor, and glanced over at the stretcher where Raven currently lay, immobile.
The machines beeped steadily to life in his ears, drawing him into an uncomfortable reality again. If he listened carefully, he could hear them pumping the air into her lungs, breathing for her, keeping her in this world, his world.
His hands went numb, his tongue feeling like sandpaper in his mouth. His eyes stung and his face felt flushed. He glanced back down at the book one more time before he reached a conclusion that he could actually stand.
"I know you're probably going to be angry with me, but I figured out a solution, so just hear me out," he explained, as he took his seat next to her.
He moved his chair in closer, so that he was right beside the bed rails, and then flipped open the book to the very first page.
"I can just start from the beginning, read it out loud for the both of us. That way, when you wake up, maybe I'll have caught up to where you left off," he told her with a half smile.
Nothing; no sound but for the whirring of Cyborg's enhanced medical equipment.
Beast Boy cleared his throat before he choked on his unshed tears, and looked back down at the page before him. The font was small, and there were a lot of words, some of which he'd never recognize or use in his lifetime. It was a daunting task, but the summary hadn't sounded too bad, and he really just wanted to give it a shot.
For Raven, if nothing else. He owed it to her.
That was how he'd winded up reading to her almost all night long, for the next couple of nights.
He read to her on the latest shift no other Titan really wanted, until his eyes would droop and he'd pass out in the chair, or against her pillow. He read until the words blurred and he couldn't think straight anymore. He read so that all he did was dream of being the poor man that had been betrayed and tormented in the story, finding his dignity only by seeking revenge on those who'd crossed him. He read while he snacked, he read as he found new, creative ways to get comfortable in the tiny chair, or until his butt got sore. Eventually, they'd find him sprawled out like that in the morning, and he'd wake up mumbling her name, thinking it had only been a part of a cruel nightmare and nothing more. Except, he'd see the strands of violet hair splayed out against the ivory white of her pillow, listen to the familiar noise of that dreadful machine, and know, with a heart sinking feeling, that this was his new reality.
Sometimes, he'd give her colorful commentary of his thoughts on a specific scene or emotional moment in the story and, to his astonishment, he would learn that he was actually enjoying the book. He'd laugh excitedly and say, "Maybe you were onto something all along, Rae. Reading isn't all that bad after all, but don't tell anyone I said that. I have an image to maintain, you know?"
However, precisely like everything else in life, eventually, even the book came to an end, and Raven's status, much to the Titans' dismay, had not changed.
As he had begrudgingly turned the final page, all Beast Boy wanted to do was allow himself to break down, to fall apart, much like the others had all those nights ago. He'd all but earned it, and it was hard to fight off the sting of tears when the scripted letters melded together on the very last page.
Instead, ever resilient, he found the tiniest glimmer of hope and hung on for dear life, because without it, the world would go darker, and there would be one less reason for waking up in the mornings.
Beast Boy would continue his reading sessions with Raven, for as long as there were books in existence, he wouldn't give up.
He refused to give up on her, because he knew in his heart of hearts that she'd never give up on any of them.
He would read until his voice was hoarse and his lips were dry.
That way, when she finally did wake up from her very long slumber, he could fill her in on everything she'd missed, and they would have something to talk about.
Whenever she did wake up…
A/N: I'm so sorry.