Author's Note: Saddest chapter of all….
Chapter 20
Kelly slammed his locker door closed and sat down on the bench. He pulled out his phone and dialed a number.
"Hello?"
"Hey, it's me."
She heard the tone of his voice and knew something was wrong. "What's up?"
"Could you bring the baby down to the house?" he asked.
"Now?"
"Yeah, if you can."
"Something wrong?"
He blew out a breath. "I just need to see him if that's okay with you?"
"I'll bring him as soon as I can."
Half an hour later, Parker entered the truck bay carrying Philip in his carrier. She approached the Squad table, but Kelly rose practically the minute she entered the bay.
"Hey," he said.
"Hey. Where can I set the carrier?"
He glanced around. "Back of the ambo will work to get him out."
She walked over to the back of the ambulance and opened the door. She slid the carrier inside and took Philip out. She handed him to Kelly.
"Hey, Buddy," he said softly as he cradled his son to him. He closed his eyes for a few seconds, then opened them. He held him tightly for a few seconds before Parker slipped a cloth over his shoulder.
"Burp cloth," she explained. "He's teething and drooling a lot."
"When did that start?"
"Yesterday."
"He fussing?"
"Not really. He's not eating much, but he's drinking like crazy. Grandma said to rub ice on his gums, which is what I've been doing."
"You know you can call me if you need a break."
"I knew you were on shift," she reminded.
Kelly kissed the top of his head. "Thanks for bringing him."
"You're welcome." She waited, wondering if he was going to say anything more.
"I just needed to see him," Kelly explained.
"Ok."
"So, can we talk some?"
"Ok."
Kelly rubbed the baby's back. They were both surprised when he let out a loud burp. "Another country heard from."
Parker smiled. "I was feeding him when you called."
"So, I was thinking. Why don't we get a place together? That way we can both be there for him."
Parker's stomach turned over. She didn't think she could live with him in the same space. She hadn't lived with anyone since she and Jimmy had broken up.
"Just think about it, ok?" he asked.
"Kelly, what's going on? You never ask to see him when you're on shift?"
He sighed. He had to come clean with her.
"We had a call this morning. Bad one. A three year old-" he broke off, tears forming in his eyes. "Baby didn't make it. And I just needed to see him."
Parker nodded. She understood his need to see and hold his son. "I'm sorry, Kelly," she said softly. She reached out to hug him.
Kelly allowed the hug. "You know, we could be good together if you'd just give us a chance."
"Kelly, you're upset right now. You'll change your mind in a couple of days. Let's not make any rash decisions right now."
"Think about it?"
She had thought about it. Her answer was no. She just couldn't bring herself to tell him that.