From Zeena Hero (Guest): "Can you do one where bill gives dipper a nightmare where he keeps turning him into magical creatures? (Deer centaur, merman, nome, manitour, gremoblin, ect.)"
Interesting... I may or may not have turned this into a (slightly) crack one-shot without meaning to. Oops.
My Favorite
This had to be one of the weirdest dreams Dipper had ever had. And considering how that one dream when he was eight had featured a miniature cat that puked rainbows (not unlike the gnomes, now that he thought about it), that was saying something.
He crossed his arms over his chest in annoyance and stared up at the cackling triangle floating not twenty feet away. "Are you done yet?"
"Oh, lighten up, Pine Tree! Where's your sense of humor?"
His entire lower half had been turned into one of a deer. Dipper was not amused.
Brown ears flattened themselves on his head as he glared as fiercely as a twelve year old half-deer boy could. "Bill."
The dream demon snickered. "Fine, you wanna be something else?"
"Yes - wait, what are you doing - ?"
The boy yelped as his body began to transform again, falling to the ground as his legs stuck together. He tried to pry them apart to no avail. Dipper gasped as he realized what was happening, realizing why his legs were changing color and oh, no, no - were those fins?!
"Better?" Bill couldn't hold back his snickering at the sight of the kid's horrified face. "Geez, your sister would be loving this right now, you know!"
"Then go mess with her dreams, not mine!" Dipper snapped. A split-second later his words sank in and his eyes grew wide. "Oh, no, I didn't mean that - ugh!"
The dream demon floated down so that they were eye level, enjoying how red the kid's cheeks were. "Relax, Pine Tree! If I wanted to mess with Shooting Star, I wouldn't be in your dreams, now would I?"
"Uh, no...?"
"Exactly!"
Bill snapped his fingers and Dipper transformed yet again, his body shrinking and the orange fish tail vanishing as he stared in shock at the triangle. His chin sprouted a bushy mane of brown hair and he cried out as the yellow triangle picked him up by the back of his shirt.
"Look at your stubby little legs! Hahahaha! Something's missing, though... Ah!"
With another snap of his fingers, a red cone-shaped hat appeared on his head. Dipper glared once more as he realized what he had been turned into this time. "Very funny, Bill. Will you change me back now?"
"What? You don't wanna be a gnome?" Bill said with mock surprise, placing the hand that wasn't holding the twelve year old gnome onto the spot right under his bowtie. If he were human, Dipper guessed that that was the equivalent of the demon's chest. "Pity."
Another snap and Dipper yelped as he was dropped on the ground. His body began to grow unnaturally tall and the boy glanced uneasily at the dream demon, unsure what he was being turned into this time. His skin turned a hideous shade of green and he winced as mushrooms sprouted upon his back, large fangs expanding in size in his mouth. His ears grew larger until they were pointed slightly like a bat. His skinny arms also grew more muscular, clumps of body hair littered all over this new form. After a moment of confusion, he turned back to Bill, shooting him a look of both annoyance and befuddlement.
"What, don't recognize yourself? Such a shame, Pine Tree. Here: take a look!"
A mirror popped into existence in front of him and Dipper shrank back in horror as he briefly glimpsed the terribly monstrous body of a gremloblin before the image shifted. Bill cackled as the boy-turned-monster gave a high-pitched scream of terror as he watched his worst nightmare play before his eyes. Oh, this kid was so much fun to toy with!
Yes, this was definitely worth skipping out on playing with Shooting Star's dreams - especially since she always ended up having those obnoxious boy bands somewhere to play synchronized music every time he showed up.
See, Dipper? Mabel's got the right idea!