I couldn't leave you hanging for long. :)

Chapter 16

Christine listened as Nadir began to speak.

"You know I was the one who brought Erik to Iran. News of his particular abilities as a magician and an oddity had traveled to my country. I found him and convinced him to come to serve as entertainment to my Shah, on orders I could not refuse. The guilt of that still haunts me, but that is not the point of this story.

"By the time I left to find Erik, my beloved wife had already died giving birth to my son, Reza. By the time Erik came to Iran, it was obvious that my son was also soon to be upon his own deathbed."

Christine pressed a hand to her mouth, but stayed silent.

He took a deep breath, and continued. "Reza was a lovely child with eyes like his mother. He took great delight in anything odd and different, which is probably why he took to Erik so easily. He was a wondrous child, unafraid of Erik and his mask. I was surprised by the way Erik humored him so, bringing him gifts when he visited and singing him silly songs. I had not seen this side of a man I only knew for his… clever ways of killing."

When Nadir paused, she cleared her throat and asked gently, "Reza was sick?"

"Yes, that much was apparent from early on in his infancy. He had Tay-Sachs disease, you see. It is genetic, progressive, and always fatal. Soon after meeting Erik, Reza could no longer see. By the time Erik was visiting regularly, he could no longer lift his hands to open his gifts."

"I'm so sorry, Nadir."

He stared out the window in front of them, lost in the past. "I knew Reza would eventually die. I had known this for a long time. But I couldn't bear to deal with it openly, having already lost my wife. Now, my son would also soon be dying right in front of me in a most horrible way. I went in to check on him one night, and he had lost the ability to speak, unable to call for me even though he was so frightened. I began to see the end of his journey before me.

"I lost it right then. I called Erik, asking him to come over. I didn't know who else to call – no one else came to visit Reza like he did; no one else had a relationship with him. Erik came over without hesitation. He sat by Reza's bed and held his hand; he stroked his fingers over Reza's feverish forehead. Erik was so calm as though this was any other visit, but I wondered: could he not hear the way Reza struggled to draw breath, the way his limbs had started to jerk?

"I couldn't stand to be in the room any longer, so I fled like the coward I was. Erik followed me, and I will never forget the look he gave me and the words he said next. He offered to end my son's life."

Christine gasped. "Oh my God, why?"

"Reza was suffering, this I already knew. He could not see nor hear; he could not move his thin body. He could no longer swallow water. His suffering could extend for hours, days, before he finally died of thirst or slowly suffocated. I knew what needed to be done, but I was not strong enough. Erik was."

Nadir leaned forward and took one of Christine's hands in both of his, covering her hand with his large palms. "I let him kill my son that night. I let him give Reza a poison that caused him to slip into a painless sleep. I held my son as he took his last breath, and I knew he had been given the gift of a peaceful death when previously I had no hope for one. Erik had been willing to do that for me. I never would have had the strength, but that man did."

Christine felt sick. She blinked past the tears that had welled up. "What are you trying to say, Nadir? That Erik is willing to kill children as well?"

"No!" Nadir took her chin and looked her steadily in the eye, like a father might to a daughter. She was instantly reminded of how her own father had chided her when he was trying to explain something, and she just wasn't getting it. "Above all, Erik has done the difficult things no one else is willing to do. Again and again, I have seen him take upon the mantle of monster for the sake of others. With my Reza. With killing the Shah so we could escape Iran. With what he has done in New York."

He released her, sitting back in his seat. "That is why I follow him – to bring him back before he slips too far. To make sure he always comes back."

"To- to protect him the way he has you."

"Yes."

She had to bring it up, to understand. "So why did he almost kill you that time in Paris?"

"If he wanted me dead, I would be dead," he said, indicating his person. "You have to realize this by now. But all of that business of course was for you."

"I don't want any of this from him, though." She smoothed the letter in her lap, traced the red lettering of her name. "I don't want him to kill for me."

"And that is why he is leaving. His instinct is to kill, to eliminate the threat. He has decided to try a different method."

"And what is that?"

Nadir spread his hands, and she found the motion to look like he was pleading with her. But for what? "Behaving like the man he believes you want him to be."

That undid her. She pressed her hands to her face and wept. She cried for the past month of experiences. For Erik's past. For Nadir's son. For everything she had thought she wanted but had only now realized was utterly a mistake.

After she had collected herself and dried her face with Nadir's handkerchief, she opened her eyes to find that he was offering another envelope to her. At her scandalized expression, he gave a small laugh.

"Not another letter, I promise."

She plucked the envelope from his hand, opened the unsealed back, and slipped out the folded piece of paper. She began to read the contents.

"I have been trying all of these years to rein Erik in," Nadir said, "and to make sure that his choices match my own moral compass. It is time that I do something for his happiness."

She began to cry anew. "What is this, Nadir?"

"Your choice." When she looked up, his own warm brown eyes glistened with tears.

Christine woke up early and made it to her morning class. Had it only been a week since she had sat in this class and read Erik's text inviting her to New York? That moment seemed years ago. She had been so excited to visit him, so thrilled to take that trip. She had worn his gown and jewels, sat in his opera box, eaten his French food, and everything had been magical.

Until it had all fallen apart.

Excusing herself to go to the bathroom, Christine grabbed her bag and didn't go back to class. Instead, she wandered the campus for a while. She hadn't taken the time to enjoy the architecture, to gaze out of any window high up enough and see the Charles River nearby. A brisk wind ruffled her hair, signaling the first signs of fall approaching. Boston always had the most gorgeous autumns.

Skipping the rest of her classes, Christine ran her errands, got coffee at her favorite place, and then finished up her tasks. They didn't take her as long as she thought they might, so she spent the extra time enjoying a long lunch of chicken tacos at Lolita's by herself.

She kept an eye on the time, and soon, she had to head back to her apartment with all of her supplies in tow. Her pillow felt heavenly beneath her cheek. Her bed, while not the most luxurious thing on the planet, was still her own, still familiar. She let herself lay there for as long as she dared, then got up and continued with her preparations.

The last phase really didn't take that long.

Less than an hour later, she stepped out of her apartment and tucked her key under the welcome mat. She stopped by the mailroom to drop off the two letters she had written, pressing her lips to each before sliding them into the box.

Now she could go.

She didn't want to risk being late, so she took a cab. Being early afternoon, the roads were fairly empty with only a few stragglers heading back to work after lunch. By the time she reached the docks, however, the roads became more congested with other passengers.

The Queen Eleanor rose up before her, a gigantic white bulk of a ship, all sleek lines stretching the full length of the pier. A city that could travel oceans.

She could still turn back. Even as she watched the cab pull away, her suitcase in one hand and her overnight bag in another, she could have changed her mind. Everything she had done that day could be overturned and explained away as a moment of panic that she had overcome. She could say she had come to her senses.

Christine looked back at the ship. She faced an unknown future ahead of her. She had no idea how Erik would react when he saw her, how her own heart would react when she saw him.

Gripping the check-in information Nadir had given her, she stepped into line to embark.

She had never taken a cruise before and certainly not one over the Atlantic, but she was too nervous to enjoy stepping onto the ship for the first time. This thing was huge, its enormous massiveness blocking out the sun. She handed over her passport and papers and got checked-in without issue, letting them take her suitcase. Nadir had warned her that she might not see her suitcase for hours, so she had packed her smaller overnight bag with items she thought she might need for the rest of the day.

She didn't see Nadir during the embarking process, which only made her stomach churn even more. That shouldn't have surprised her, however; hundreds of people were boarding this ship. She went through the safety drills along with everyone else, and soon she was allowed to stand freely on one of the decks.

The crew untethered the ship to the dock. A cheer rose up from the passengers standing around her, all of them gathered to see the ship pull away from shore. She moved to a deck facing the stern and watched as the skyline slowly faded from view, steadily slipping into the distant horizon.

She sighed and went to find the cabin Nadir had purchased in her name. He was already waiting for her there, and she threw her arms around the older man. He seemed startled by the affection but chuckled and patted her arm.

"I am happy to see you as well, Miss Daaé. I admit, I was not convinced that you would come."

"I'm still freaked out that I'm here. This is all so surreal."

"Let us hope I survive long enough to see you through this voyage."

He had warned her that Erik might be furious with him, and so Nadir would take this cabin, the existence of which was unknown to Erik. She would take the state room that had originally been booked for the two men to share.

She had protested at first. Shouldn't she let Erik come to her when he was ready, rather than just showing up in his room? However, Erik's swift anger was a strong reality, so she was acquiesced to Nadir's request. Best that Erik be allowed to cool down before the two men met again.

Nadir handed her the electronic card to the other room. "This one is yours. I will slip the match just under the door so Erik can fetch it when he arrives. We will trade our luggage once it is brought to us. For now, perhaps you should get some dinner and explore the ship."

"When will Erik come up from the cargo hold?"

"Not until very late, I am afraid. I paid an exorbitant amount to ship my priceless antique with me, but he will have to sneak his own way to the cabin."

She nodded and started to head out of the room. Changing her mind, she stuck her head back in. "Uh, do you want to have dinner with me?"

The smile he gave her was his biggest yet. He did really have a kind face, framed in laugh lines around his eyes. "A man's last meal before execution!"

She patted his arm. "Then make it a good one with my fantastic company."

"You are charming, Miss Daaé."

The two of them started for the elevator. "Please, call me Christine. After everything we've been through, that's the least you could do."

"Nadir, then, if you please."

They had dinner at one of the cruise ship's more casual spots. Christine had never had the opportunity to simply talk with the Iranian, and she discovered several facts about him that made her realize they could easily be friends. First of all, Nadir didn't care much for opera but he loved a lively pop song, especially anything Indian. Secondly, he loved horses and promised to introduce her to one of his favorites at their destination. Third, he had the best deep belly chuckle after two glasses of cognac.

Christine herself didn't have even a single glass of wine. She needed to be awake and alert for tonight, and besides, she felt bad enjoying herself while Erik was hiding in a crate somewhere below.

Nadir, on the other hand, ate and drank like a man who really was about to be executed. She kind of worried about him – Erik was sure to know who was to blame for this sneakiness. But at least she would get to Erik first.

They stood on the deck for a while after sundown, staring into the darkness that stretched across the ocean. The fresh cool breeze felt wonderful against her face.

Nadir yawned and gave her hand a pat. "Off to bed with me. You have my room number should you need to call. I have great hope that he will get over his shock quickly."

"We'll see." She gave him a small smile as they headed off the deck.

A moment later, Nadir met her halfway, and they traded luggage. Quick good nights, knowing looks exchanged, and they parted.

Christine took an elevator up to the top floor of the state rooms. She couldn't imagine how much money they had spent on such an expensive room, but Nadir had told her it was necessary for privacy. More room meant more space for Erik to hide should he need to. Besides that, the state rooms all shared a butler and a private restaurant, all adding to the ability for Erik to stay concealed.

Using the keycard Nadir had given her, Christine opened the door. The space fell open to a huge room larger than her own apartment, the ceilings rising to a two story glass view of the ocean. Several couches and comfortable-looking chairs in warm brown formed a relaxing place in the middle of the room, with a small dining room beyond that. A suitcase stood to one side of the room, and she guessed that it belonged to Erik.

A full stocked bar stood to the left of the door. Nearby, a black baby grand piano caught her eye. This was a room even Erik could love.

Exploring, she found a small bedroom and bathroom on the first floor. She put her suitcase in here, not wanting to presume that she would take the master bedroom, which was upstairs. She ventured up the gently curving staircase to the top floor. Inside the room was the largest bed she had ever seen, the plush white linen sheets a stark contrast with the thick midnight blue rug on the floor. The bedroom opened to a balcony that overlooked the rest of the suite below, but it could be separated by a heavy curtain. Upstairs, she also found another bathroom, this one containing a jetted tub.

She headed back downstairs to wait. Feeling grimy from the long day, she took a quick shower and changed into fresh clothes. She didn't want to be presumptuous and put on pajamas; after all, he could ban her to Nadir's room instead. On second thought, maybe she should get more comfortable. If he arrived to find her already ready for bed, maybe he wouldn't immediately throw her out.

Selecting a nightgown that was more like a long t-shirt from her suitcase, she pulled it on. The thin fabric fell to her knees. It wasn't intentionally sexy by any means, but it wasn't demur either. The thick carpet felt terrific under her bare feet. She left on her bra, unable to think about going without it just yet.

She made sure to dig Erik's letter out of her purse and bring it into the living room with her.

She tried watching TV for a while, but not much else was available besides news, so she turned it off. Digging the book on the history of opera that Erik had given her out of her bag, she flipped through it, but she could not concentrate enough. At Nadir's request, she had not brought her cell phone, instead leaving it at her apartment in Boston. He didn't want to risk being tracked by it. She had also left her computer behind for that reason.

Christine sighed and stretched out on the largest couch in the living room, the letter at her feet. She was too wired to sleep, which was good. The last thing she wanted was to be asleep when Erik arrived. She let her body relax into the soft fabric of the couch. This ship was headed to England, but Nadir hadn't told her what their final destination would be. He had said something about a safe house further inland, not in England. What had been the name of the town? The last day had been such a blur. She had barely left herself focus on what she was doing.

The rasp of a keycard at the door caught her ear, followed by the soft suction of the door opening into the air conditioned room. Christine froze, not sure what her first move should be. She had thought and thought about all of this, but now, her mind went blank. Footsteps softly treaded into the room; the door closed and the deadbolt was locked.

She heard a sigh, barely a soft exhalation. Two plops upon the floor followed; he must have taken off his hat and cloak and let them fall. His two gloves were also tossed, one falling closer to the couch at her feet. She didn't dare move, not yet. Maybe she should have turned on more lights besides the lamp upstairs and the one near the dining table.

The footsteps continued further into the room, crossing to the stocked bar. The click of glass and the gush of liquid, and she chanced a glance over the edge of the couch.

Erik stood there, back to her. He had poured a glass of some type of amber liquor, but now he placed his hands to either side of the bar and bowed his head as if in great pain, his shoulders hunched, his back bowed.

Her heart broke. She rose up onto her knees, knowing that he immediately heard her, and of course a joke was the first thing out of her mouth. "Do we need to talk about your drinking problem?"

He spun around and really, she shouldn't have startled him like that. One of his hands darted into his pocket, and she knew without a second's hesitation that he was feeling for the punjab. At the same time she scrambled off the couch, his hands jerked out of his pocket like his fingertips had been shocked by electricity. The red lasso flew out of his pocket and fell onto the floor between them as though he had pulled back a second before releasing it.

She moved away from the couch so only floor lay between them and raised both of her hands in a soothing gesture. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that."

He was panting, the halting of his attack having evidently taken effort. His white half mask was back, and she was glad to be able to see his face again. For a second, she had seen a flurry of emotions over his face when he had seen her. Now, his features were carefully blank despite the quick rise and fall of his chest.

He wasn't moving, statuesque, so she bent down and picked up the punjab, holding it draped between her hands like a snake. The thin rope was warm from having been in his pocket. How many people had this simple instrument killed? She pushed aside that thought. Not wanting the lasso between them, she set it onto an end table next to the couch.

He still hadn't spoken. They stood there staring at each other until he arched to down his drink. He poured another, and when he had turned around, she had crept a little closer, this time with the envelope outstretched to him.

His gaze burned from the letter to her face and back again. "The seal is intact. You have not read it." He sounded rough, so unlike his usual silky smoothness.

"I thought you could read it to me," she replied, marveling that her voice did not quiver.

He scoffed. "You boarded this cruise ship so I would read the letter aloud to you?"

She didn't bother answering that. She kept the letter held out to him. Finally, his musician fingers reached out to pluck it from her. He gulped down his drink and poured a third, then took the glass with him as he went to a nearby armchair. She followed, keeping her distance, as he sat with practiced calm.

She shook off the awkwardness that crept over her, standing a few yards away in her nightgown. She was pretty sure there was a cat on the front of her shirt, but she didn't dare look down at it now. Her heart began to beat faster in anticipation. She had come here for this and so much more, and she couldn't back down now.

Setting his drink aside, Erik opened the envelope and unfolded the single piece of paper inside with slow, deliberate movements. She caught sight of his penmanship before he began to read.

"My dearest Christine,

"I hope this letter might find you in better spirits than when we last parted. My actions and words are inexcusable, deplorable crimes against the most basic form of human decency."

Erik shifted, his lanky legs bent at comfortable angles, the picture of composure despite what he was reading.

She saw right through him.

"I am indeed a monster and worst of all – I had the impudence to push myself into your life again and again without your express approval. I have been nothing but selfish in our every encounter." Erik cleared his throat, his only sign of discomfort. "I tried to take from you in order to restore my own salvation. I tried to force your affection and instead revealed the worst part of myself. I dare not beg for your exoneration for I deserve none.

I have enclosed an amount of money to assist you in whatever endeavor you purpose. I understand this gift will anger you, but I mean only to ease your burdens. You would not accept my tokens of affection, but I hope you will accept this. Spend it, give it to charity – it is yours."

He paused, his eyes flicking anywhere but her face. She had her teeth clenched against any form of tears – she had no time for them here.

He continued, "I am a coward for I cannot say these next words to your face. You, Christine, have been a light in my life. I never dreamed I could come as close to the sun as I have with you, and my world will be eternally altered. I will think of you fondly, dearest. Never a day will go by that I do not think of you.

Ever yours, ever in adoration,

Erik."

He tossed the letter at her feet. From the envelope, he drew out a prepaid cash card and pitched it to the floor as well.

His voice was thick when he spoke again. He met her gaze now, his eyes filled with bitterness. "You came here to hear me read this, did you? Wanting to hear it from my own lips?"

"Yes."

"And what is your reply?"

"I love you."

She had echoed those words in her head all evening, and now they spilled forth easily.

He stared at her for a long time. She refused to back down, meeting the intenseness of his golden eyes with her own open expression. He broke the contact first, raising his glass to his mouth to sip. "First thing in the morning, I will seek out a different cabin. You may have this one. After that, I will kill the old man." He took another long drink. "After we make port in Southampton, you will be on the first flight back to Boston."

She held out her arms, stepping a little closer. "Erik, I left everything behind. I have already said goodbye to my mother and Meg. They will have received their letters long before we ever reach England."

She kept her palms up, placating. He was frozen, glass to his lips, his other hand a claw digging into his thigh. She approached closer. "I cancelled the lease on my apartment."

He shuddered, his fingers whitening around his drink.

She didn't relent. "I emptied my bank account. I let the university know I was dropping out of school."

The glass flew past her and shattered against the far wall. "You stupid girl!" he wailed, the revealed half of his face twisted in fury. No, not fury. Something else entirely.

She walked closer until she was standing before him, and the hem of her nightshirt skimmed his knees. The tension pulsed from him like heated waves against her skin. He gripped the leather armrests, the chair groaning.

He bit out his next words. "I left you to keep you safe."

"I know."

"I left to make sure you could continue your own life without me."

"I know." Her breath stirred the strands of his wig that had come loose about his forehead.

"And now you are throwing it all away." His sweet voice rose up in a moan of despair.

She took another step until she was against the chair, between his long legs. He pressed himself backwards, but that didn't matter. Slowly, she laid her palms upon the smooth backs of his hands and felt their trembling.

"You cannot do this, Christine!"

Her courage threatened to flee her, but she held firmly onto it. She grasped the backs of his hands and brought them to her own waist. In the same moment, she tucked one of her knees upon the chair at his hip. Her other knee followed until she was hovering above him. His body shook, and she covered him with her own, settling atop his lap, well aware of how her nightshirt hiked up around her thighs. His hands stayed where she had placed them, their presence a cool whisper of yearning.

"I love you, Erik," she said again, her lips a breath above his. "I'm where I want to be."

She touched her lips to his in a light kiss. When she slanted her mouth to draw him more firmly against her, she felt the barest hint of response. She pulled back enough to rasp, "Please… hold me."

As if he had been awaiting permission, his arms gathered her up, holding her more firmly against him, his pulse wild beneath her own fierce heartbeat. His hands smoothed across her back, danced across her arms, and back to her shoulders, down to hips and up to entangle long fingers into her curls.

The barest hint of a groan from him, and she was lost in his welcoming kiss. He had never embraced her like this, his thin lips parting sweetly against hers. This was so unlike the kisses they had shared since Paris, free of coercion and fear. These were full of promise. She tasted the slight dark flavor of liquor on his tongue and delved deeper to taste it again. His arms crushed her to him, and she gasped with joy.

He drew back a moment and pressed the forehead of his mask against hers. "I am a fool of a man."

She laughed softly. "Yes, but you're my fool. If you will have me."

He answered by touching his lips to hers again.

The end! Ha! I'm joking - promise. This is the end of this part of the story, but it will continue. From here on out, the rating changes to M. We still have much more drama to work through and questions to answer!

I hope you enjoyed a bit of sweetness. :) I'm off to vacation, so the next update will be in a week or so. Since it'll be a longer gap, I promise a snippet to anyone who reviews!