I did upload a lot so commenting on every chapter does get boring... so I may be silent...
Regret is a part of life.
That is what jiraiya had told him. Jiraiya had said that he had lived with regret for a long time, regret that he couldn't stop his teammate gone bad and that he couldn't save his broken hearted teammate. Jiraiya had told him that sometimes there were regrets that happened without us knowing and it was a part of life; everyone had regrets.
But Naruto didn't want that kind of life that was why he always headed head first no matter what and never backed down. If he made a promise he would stick to it, because he didn't want to regret anything.
But there were somethings that he regretted like that time he lost control and took dad's arm. Or when he made that bet with Jiraiya and lost forcing him to read the Ichi Ichi paradise series. He regretted not being able to save Haku and rely on the fox's power. He regretted not getting his mom help, and almost killing Sasuke and Sakura. He regretted a lot of things.
But he had learned not to blame people for those regrets. It was too easy to blame Gato for Haku being killed or blame Haku for using his power, He could always find someone to blame.
But he didn't want to. Because Blame could easily turn into hate and he didn't want that to ever consume him.
So he didn't want to blame the person who did this. He didn't want to hate… But as tears filled his eyes he knew how easy it could be. Because the pain was too great for him to want to let things go, for him not to blame.
But how could he? When the person was looking back at him like that. With tears and regret to much for anyone to handle. How could he blame that person for what they did?
But he wished he could, because if blaming made the pain in his heart hurt just a bit less than he would happily take it….
But how could he blame him, how could he hate him…
How could he hate Gaara for killing Rin?
Gaara was overwhelmed. He was torn and conflicted.
He wanted to die.
He knew what had happened, his seal wasn't as strong as Naruto's but he was surprised it was so weak. That being in a life threatening situation it had almost shattered. And Shukaku had been unleashed. But that woman...that woman who was like him… She wanted to save him.
Even as he screamed to kill people she wanted to save him….. And she did...and she had died.
It was his fault.
But that wasn't what bothered him the most… no,
What bothered him was when he looked up and there next to her dead body stood the one person he hadn't wanted to see it…. Naruto.
"Tell me...tell me how am i supposed to live…"
Naruto had asked that. And he knew why, because Naruto had little control over his demon. Gaara had heard of when Naruto had gone berserk, the evidence was in Minato's missing arm. Naruto was scared he would lose control. It was a legitimate fear for any jinjuriki. So Gaara understood but for some reason he couldn't sympathize. He just wasn't afraid like Naruto was….
He had never hurt someone like that.
"Tell me...tell me how am i supposed to live… If i'm the one who kills everyone?"
He hadn't known the answer then, and a month later he still had come to no conclusion. But now he knew….
You couldn't….
One just couldn't live with the guilt that came with it, One couldn't bear the fact that they had brought someone that they cared so much about to complete sorrow...like he had to Naruto.
He was the one that brought the tears to Naruto eyes.
It was his fault Naruto looked like he was in so much pain…
Even though...even though…
"It's stupid really"
Naruto laughed as he continued bouncing the ball half listening as Gaara sat on the swing,
"No what's stupid was Horio was just going to waste a good ball, anything ya have to say will probably be genius"
Gaara liked the smile on Naruto's face and returned it with some effort,
"Well… It's just about...your dream."
Naruto caught the ball in his hand ceasing it's bounce and looked at the young Gaara,
"My dream?"
Gaara nodded slowly,
"Yea… to protect people…"
Gaara tried to gather the courage to speak what had been on his mind for awhile now.
"I think...I want...to protect people too...i want to be.. Kazekage like my dad.."
But Gaara caught himself,
"I mean… I know the villagers don't...well they don't like me but… one day..i want them to ..acknowledge me… and...well…"
Naruto still remained silent,
"I...want to ...protect this place…"
There was a moment of silence. He was sure Naruto would laugh at him, Or maybe get angry for stealing his idea, but he had said they were friends and so for some reason, he wanted him to know.
"As i thought…"
He heard Naruto say and looked up. Not to see anger or mockery but joy, pure joy and happiness reflected in those bright blue eyes.
"Anythin ya say is genius!"
Naruto landed heavily in the swing beside him,
"Alright! I don't know if i'll be hokage but imma rootin for ya kay. I'll help ya protect your important people and you help me!"
Naruto said with that cheesy smile he always wore. And Gaara had never felt happier, and he swore in his heart that was what he would do. For this person who had accepted all of him he would be there, he would help him.
He was sure for the first time his face had morphed into something hideously ugly and stupid. With Tears, snot and blood mixing in a puddle under his chin.
That pink haired girl that was on his team was unconscious from being pinned to a tree. And the Uchiha was severely injured with wounds that he surely hadn't recieved from his battle with the hyuga. And that woman...He didn't know her but he was sure she was someone special from the amount of tears that continued to fall from Naruto's eyes. The way Naruto had fell to her side and pulled her mangled body close uncaring how much blood got on him.
"Tell me...tell me how am i supposed to live… If i'm the one who kills everyone?"
It didn't have to be everyone...just one was enough…
Gaara couldn't even move to get to Naruto. He wanted to apologize and prostrate himself, to offer his life…. But he was too drained and physically broken to attempt anything… so all he could do was watch.. Watch as red chakra began to cover his dear friend...watch his friends body rack from sobs...watch...and wait… for his friend to kill him, and end his misery.
Sasuke struggled to move. His body hurt everywhere and he was sure that he had more than one broken bone. And he had clearly overdone it when he dove in to catch Sakura falling from the tree, but he had to. Sasuke would not be the one who let her die. The fight was more brutal than any he had been in. That Gaara whatever was a monster, that was a fact. He didn't care who it was or how he had just wanted to kill. Sasuke had tried to buy time for Rin to gather chakra but the fight with Hyuga had drained him more than he had thought. And when he was sure he was done...Sakura jumped in to save him. That monster used her as leverage for "excitement" and Sasuke really wished he could have given it to him but he was out of chakra.
Then the real fight started. Rin had come in with all her experience and skills and lay it on him. And they were sure that was it; they had won. But as soon as Gaara went to sleep the real horror started. Rin somehow or the other had become some kind of turtle thing to fight against that raccoon monster. And though Water should have beat sand… Rin was too soft. And just as fast and strangely as it had begun...it ended… and so had Rin's life.
She had freed that red head at a heavy cost and Sasuke had never felt so sick as he had when her body free fell limply cracking as it hit the ground.
Rin was gone….
Sasuke didn't know her all that well, but he knew of her. Medical director, former teammate of Kakashi hatake and Obito Uchiha. Mentor leader in medical training. She was a saint. Her medical prowess was said to rival lady tsunade the legendary sannin, she was requested world wide for her skills and gentle heart.
Sakura looked up to her like a big sister, promising to be just like her.
Naruto also looked up to her like a mentor with mother like tendencies.
She could ease the edge Kakashi sometimes had and…
Obito loved her…
And she was dead.
Sasuke just couldn't believe it. There was no way, she had seemed so strong not to long ago fighting head to head with that monster so why...it just couldn't be true…
But When he saw a familiar figure run onto the field. When he saw the way that he looked at the red head in shock and then Rin in tears….
Sasuke knew….
This was no joke…
Rin was dead.
And he hated himself for being happy when he saw that red chakra begin to engulf his teammate.
But he couldn't help himself...that Monster deserved to die… for taking someone so dear to all of them…
The once bright blue sky began to cloud as a roll of thunder sounded
he deserved to die!
BWAHAHAHAHA! YES I AM EVIL! YES I DID THAT! BWAHAHAHA I REGRET NOTHING!