Peeta tossed a military duffel bag and a laptop bag into the backseat of Katniss's car. "I hope you don't mind that I brought my laptop. I need to do the books for this week," he explained as he climbed into the passenger side.
"I can help, you know," Katniss offered with a smile. "I have a MBA from Capitol University that I don't really use."
"I couldn't really pay you, but you can have all of the cheese buns and cake pops you can eat," he offered with a laugh.
"Sounds like a good deal to me," Katniss agreed as he turned the car onto the highway that led north into the mountains.
They talked about the publishing conference and his week at the bakery as they drove and stopped at a small grocery near the cabin to get supplies for the weekend.
Upon arriving at the cabin, Peeta helped carry the bags and groceries inside and helped put them away. After everything was in it's place, Katniss showed him around the small space.
"There is one bedroom and you can use it if you want, but the sofa is pretty fantastic and you may want that. The back porch is screened in and I spend a lot of time there when I am here. It is a good place for writing and thinking. There is a TV and WiFi. There is a lake for fishing and swimming and hiking trails. It's not much, especially compared to the ski lodges, but I like it here," she explained.
"I love the colors," Peeta said, talking in the dark reds, oranges, greens and purples. "It is autumn back at home….it is you….the way I remember you. Did you ever bring Gale here? Or your husband?"
"No. Gale could never get away from the club promotions and Finnick didn't like the mountains. He liked the water. I think he could swim before he could walk, being from Four. My friends Johanna, Clove and Elektra like the mountains, but this place is too quiet for them. They like the ski cabins. This place is solely mine. You are the first person I have ever brought here," she explained, realizing she didn't know how she felt about that.
An awkward silence fell between them. Finally, Peeta cleared his throat. "It has been a long day, for you especially. I will take this fabulous sofa and will cook breakfast in the morning in exchange for the wonderful accommodations."
"That would be great. Please wake me if you need anything," Katniss offered as she headed for the bedroom.
++++++BREAK++++++
Peeta found the sofa to be every bit as comfortable as Katniss had promised, but could not fall asleep right way.
How can I sleep when everything I have wanted since I was five is here with me? He wondered, staring at the glow in the dark stars that covered the ceiling. She's ten feet away, but it might as well be a million miles. She has been through so much and I haven't been there at all. Will she let me in after all this time?
Why am I the only one she ever brought here? Will she still be so open once she learns what I have to say? Or just tell me to never see her again?
Peeta's thoughts continued to drift until he finally realized he wasn't getting anywhere and that he had promised Katniss breakfast in just a few short hours. French toast and bacon will be good, he thought, rolling onto his side and drifting off to sleep.
++++++BREAK++++++
Katniss awoke to the aroma of French toast, bacon and coffee. Peeta has been hard at work in the kitchen while I slept in, she realized. Some hostess I am.
Peeta didn't seem to mind the fact that she had slept in and kept piling her plate high with food. When she finally convinced him that she could not eat another bite, he promised to clean up while she worked on the books.
"A girl could get used to this," she joked. "I will bring you with me every time I come up here."
"It's the least I could do for inviting me to stay and for helping with the books. That is the hardest part of running the bakery for me, " he admitted with a sheepish grin.
As she worked through everything for that week, Katniss offered to show him some programs that would make things easier. She also promised to introduce him to suppliers and potential customers throughout the city that could help grow the business. "Capitol Magazine is the top selling magazine in the city and I run the business section. I would like to do an article on the bakery at some point. That alone will bring you a ton of business."
They talked more about running a small business and how the media and word of mouth could really help him gain clients. After closing the laptop down when she was finished, Katniss looked out the small window in the kitchen.
"I was going to suggest a walk to the lake, but it looks like a storm is going to come through in a bit. Do you want to sit on the back porch and watch the rain?" she asked.
Peeta agreed and they took blankets and coffee cups and sat side by side on the wicker love seat that almost filled the back porch and watched the rain come across the mountains in companionable silence.
Katniss finally spoke after several minutes, almost as though curiosity had gotten the better of her. "Peeta you said you wanted to talk. Do you mean about Gale? You said you knew the truth."
"Yes," Peeta replied. "About Gale. And about Finnick."
Katniss turned to glare at him in surprise. "What-what about Finnick?"
"This is hard to say…." he started and trailed off. "Katniss, I knew your husband. He was my commanding officer."
Katniss's jaw dropped. "What-how-why," she stammered, not able to complete a thought.
"Finnick was my commanding officer. The best I ever served under. A roadside bomb blew up the Jeep I was in on a patrol one night, which is the accident that led to me losing my leg," he explained, touching the artificial limb as though it somehow made the story seem more real. "Me and another guy from my unit were captured and I was pretty much convinced that I was going to die there from the blood loss. The next day, Finnick and some of the others came to bust us out. He threw me over his shoulder and said 'You'll be ok, Bread Boy. And when you are better I'm going to take you to Four and have Kitty introduce you to all of her friends. You can have your pick after they find out what a hero you are."
Katniss smiled, tears welling up in her eyes. "That sounds like something he would say."
"I passed out again after that and woke up in the hospital two days later with a prosthetic leg on the lower half," he continued. "It was then that I learned that Finn had been killed in another roadside bomb. That news was the worst thing I have ever had to go through, "he explained, tears spilling out of his eyes. "Worse than being captured, worse than losing my leg…..to know that Finn saved me and I couldn't do anything for him…..it's awful."
"I knew that he was married, but I truly did not know that you were 'Kitty.' He kept the details of his private life all to himself, other than having me help pick out your ring. I thought about going to Four to see if I could find Finn's widow, but what would I have said? 'He saved me and I couldn't save him?' It would have just made things worse…...There are days when I wish it would have been different, especially knowing now that he was your husband," Peeta explained.
"Finnick loved the military," Katniss said. "More than anything, I think. Sometimes I think more than me."
Peeta glared at her sharply. "That is not true at all. He kept you to himself because you were so precious to him. He was getting out to be with you. He showed me the papers a few days before the accident," he explained.
"We had talked about it, but I didn't think he had actually put in the papers," Katniss admitted. "What Finnick didn't know at the time he died was that I was about three months pregnant with our baby. The shock of it all caused a miscarriage and I lost the baby. The grief of losing Finnick and our baby was too much for me. I ended up in the hospital for 3 months afterwards," Katniss explained, eyes downcast as though admitting a shameful secret.
Peeta put his arm around her shoulders and they both cried openly. "How do you find the strength to go on?" Peeta wondered.
"How do you?" Katniss countered as she settled into his embrace as they continued to watch the storm.
++++++BREAK++++++
After the storm passed, Katniss suggested a walk to the lake, hoping the change in scenery would turn the talk away from all of the sadness they had discussed as she was emotionally drained.
"You should bring your sketch book," she suggested. "I think you will find lots of interesting scenes at the lake to turn into art. I need to work on the outline and summary for my book if I want anyone to look at picking it up."
They sat in the wooden deck chairs on the small rocky beach, sketching and writing. Katniss was right about the scenery, he thought. The sapphire water with mountain reflections, parents fishing with children, birds of every color. He sketched them all and then sketched Katniss in several poses, her pen moving across the page of her notebook, forehead wrinkled in concentration. He sketched her gazing out at the lake, eyes unseeing, lost in thoughts only she could hear.
I wonder what she is thinking about. Her book? Finn? The baby? Where does she find the strength to go on each day? To let people into her life?
"Peeta, do you remember that day in the summer after school go out? That day you followed me to the lake in Twelve?" she asked out of the blue.
Peeta sighed. "Yes, I remember."
"What made you follow me that day?"
"You ran by that bakery, so upset and you had this odd look in your eyes," he explained as he shivered momentarily, recalling that day. "You had this look of finality about you. Like you were done with everything. I was afraid that you would run away…..or worse. So I followed you."
"I don't know if I ever said this, but thank you," she said earnestly. "Thank you for being my friend that day and thank you for being my friend now."
"I'll always be your friend, Katniss," he promised, holding up the sketches as though they were some kind of proof. "Always."