Malik had never thought that it would be comforting to enter Valhalla after a day of staying at home and spending time with family, but he supposed he probably should have expected that a day like that would come eventually.

Much as he'd loved seeing Rishid and Ishizu again, interacting them was almost physically taxing. He'd spent so long putting up walls and projecting this facade of being a force not to be reckoned with that letting those walls crumble and turning off the projector was a real pain. It was far easier to build up and turn it on, really.

His relief at entering the place was soon replaced by something akin to… Was it disgust? No. No, not disgust. Surprise, he supposed.

Yes. Surprise seemed appropriate.

After all, it wasn't every day he walked into Valhalla to see Yugi being pinned against his throne and mercilessly fucked by a certain white-haired Bandit King. Of course, his initial thought was, "Yami and Atem will be pissed if they find out", followed by, "Damn, I tend to forget Ryou only bottoms if he wants to."

Outwardly, he pretended to ignore them and flopped onto his chaise as if nothing was out of the ordinary. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see his arrival had changed nothing except that Yugi was now hiding his face in the upholstery and Ryou was smirking broadly. He got out his phone, opened a game at random, and spent the next few minutes working his way mindlessly through the levels. It wasn't like he really had anything better to be doing with his time, after all - not until those two got done with their rather untimely rendezvous.

What had they even called him for, again?

Oh yeah. They wanted to talk about the Millennium Puzzle. Wanted to talk about the Millennium Puzzle and wean information about the other Millennium Items out of him. He wasn't sure, yet, how much information he actually intended to give them. How much did he trust them, really?

He almost snorted, knowing that the truth of the matter was that he didn't, really. He 'trusted' them with his life, yes, but trusting them to keep him alive during a confrontation was very different than trusting them with a life-altering secret. He'd carried it around with him for seven years and never told a soul, but could they do the same? Would they?

The only way to find out for sure would be to test them.

But how to… Oh. Of course. He could mind control them into telling him their deepest, darkest secrets - or simply ask them to. For the sake of learning the secret of the Millennium Items, they would have to tell him their greatest secret. It was perfect. If they really wanted the knowledge, they'd tell him… And then he'd have blackmail.

He was a terrible person, but he was alright with that knowledge.

He was snapped out of his thoughts by one of his comrades clearing their throat loudly. He flicked his eyes over toward the sound, seeing Ryou lounging on his cushion and Yugi fixing his suit with a bright blush on his face.

"Sorry you had to see that." Yugi muttered. "We weren't expecting you to show up for another few minutes."

"We thought you might have breakfast with your siblings, for some reason." Ryou raised a brow.

"Talking to them is emotionally draining, at the moment." Malik shrugged. "And I've certainly seen worse things. Any particular reason why…?"

"Ryou was horny." Yugi sighed as he sat down, shifting with a wince. "And I'm too submissive and sex starved to say no."

"Didn't you and Atem fuck just yesterday?"

"Yeah, and it was awesome, don't get me wrong, but one time doesn't make up for three years of the occasional quickie at my office or in the Thieves' Den and nothing else."

Malik thought about it, then shrugged again. "I suppose you're right. Ryou's great in bed, but he's not exactly Marik. Or Yami, right?"

"Right." Yugi replied immediately before blinking. "Wait a second…"

"Yes." Ryou snickered, "We've been fucking. The whole time, pretty much."

"How are you still horny?" The darker haired man looked almost horrified. "Me, Zen, Malik, and whoever else…"

"Hey," The Bandit King waved his index finger at him. "I've only fucked Zen twice in the past three years, and I've barely fucked you ten times." Then he snickered again, "As for how I'm still horny? I dunno. Maybe I'm just hypersexual."

Yugi hummed, murmuring, "Maybe," before turning to Malik. "You know what you're here for, right? I can't recall if I told you."

For a moment, Malik was concerned. He furrowed his brows. "But you barely called me an hour ago, Yugi."

Yugi shrugged. "My short-term memory is terrible. Can we move on, now?"

"I suppose. But yes, I know why I'm here." The Egyptian sat up a bit. "You want to know what I know about the Millennium Items."

"Yep."

They all paused for a moment as a young man made his way between them, depositing drinks on the tables next to their respective 'thrones'. He bowed to them, when he was done, and retreated back the way he'd came.

"You know it isn't just as simple as you asking and me telling, right?"

"Of course not." The Pharaoh groaned quietly. "Why would it be that simple?"

He ignored him, for the most part, continuing as he'd originally intended. "There's a lot riding on their nature being kept secret. If just anyone could ask a Tomb Keeper for the information and get it, we'd have a war on our hands."

"We already have one." Ryou quirked an eyebrow, sipping his tea. "I suppose we really don't need a second one."

Malik frowned. "I guess that's one way to put it."

"What do we have to do to get the information, then?" As usual, Yugi got them back on track.

"The Millennium Items are my deepest, darkest secret." The Egyptian said carefully, "And that of my entire family." He rubbed his chin. "An eye for an eye."

They stared at him for a minute. He wasn't sure if they were trying to process what he'd said, or if they were trying to understand what it meant. Finally, Ryou nodded, murmuring something about that being fair. Yugi merely sighed.

"Our deepest secret for yours, eh?"

"Exactly."

"Well, Ryou, would you like to go first?" Yugi looked to the Brit. "I have to really consider what qualifies as my 'deepest, darkest secret'."

Ryou set his teacup down and chewed on the inside of his bottom lip. "Really, Malik, I think you already know all of mine." He heaved a sigh. "Maybe not in words, but you know the emotions."

Damn. Malik had forgotten about that. "You're sure I know all of them, though?"

"... No. But I'd rather not tell the few you don't. They're… Embarrassing, to say the least."

The tomb keeper levelled an unimpressed look at him. He sighed and twirled a piece of his hair around his finger, casting his eyes downward to avoid the expression on Malik's face. Did he really want Malik to know any of that? The answer was pretty easy - fuck no. Did he have a choice in the matter if he wanted to know anything about the Millennium Items? Not unless he wanted to ask Ishizu, and she'd probably have him do something even more embarrassing before she told him.

He sighed. "Fine, fine. Just… Give me a moment to pick my poison, yeah?"

"I have all the time in the world, Ryou." Malik leaned back,trying very hard to conceal his smirk. "Please feel free to use it."

I always kinda wanted to fuck Marik. Ryou knew that Malik didn't know about that… But was it a good idea to say it? Bakura technically had legal custody of me until I was 18. He shuddered. No, that one was definitely out. They didn't need to know that. That was between him and Bakura. I'm an orphan and that's why you've never met my parents. Uh, no. Better they believed whatever story they currently had in their heads. They didn't need to know about the car crash or the gun. That was deeply personal and led right back to the thing about Bakura having custody of him. I had a twin sister. Nope. I was crazy before Bakura left but his disappearance made me snap completely. Uh… Yeah, no.

Each secret that came to mind was more personal and hard to word than the last. He knew he was supposed to be telling Malik his deepest secret, but his deepest secret was currently something along the lines of You two are the only things keeping me from going on a mass-murdering rampage. They… Really didn't need to know that. They might encourage him to do it.

Not a good idea.

And then he remembered something, all of a sudden. It just hit him entirely out of the blue.

He currently had ownership of the Millennium Ring and the Millennium Rod.

He'd forgotten about them, really - they were stashed away with most of his riches in a secret room in his house. Bakura had told him they what they were, before he disappeared. Said something about them having "unspeakable power". Ryou hadn't put much thought into them since then, past the occasional "Oh, I remember this." when he was going through his treasures and came across them.

When he opened his mouth, finally, Malik raised his eyebrows in surprise. He clearly hadn't expected Ryou to think of anything just yet.

"I dunno if it qualifies as my 'darkest secret', but I do currently have two of the Items stored away in my treasure room at my house." He went back to twisting the piece of hair around his finger. "I'd forgotten about them - Bakura told me it was best I didn't ever use them so I just kind of left them in there."

Malik blinked. "You've… You've avoided the temptation of using them for the past three years? You forgot you had them? Because Bakura told you you shouldn't use them?"

"... That's pretty much the long and short of it, yeah." Ryou didn't really understand why Malik seemed so perplexed by the idea. "I don't even know what they do, just that they're powerful." He shrugged. "What's the use in trying to use something if you don't know what it does or how to use it in the first place?"

"I guess you have a point there, but haven't you ever been tempted?"

"Countless times." He shrugged again. "But it's impractical to try."

Malik slowly nodded. "... I'll accept that as a secret." He informed him. "Since they, themselves, are clearly a secret. No one else knows you have them?"

"No one but you two and Bakura. Maybe the little servant boy, too, if he was listening."

They glanced at the room he'd retreated into, and, as if he could see them looking, the servant boy squeaked out a barely-there, "I didn't hear nothin'!"

Ryou bit back an amused smile. "See that you stick to that story."

"Yessir!"

"Cute kid." Ryou observed as he turned back to Malik. "Is he one of yours?"

Malik shook his head. "One of Yugi's."

"Sage." The Pharaoh supplied absently.

"Thought of anything yet, Yugi?"

He sighed and shook his head. "I can't think of jack shit."

"Do you just not keep secrets?" Ryou teased.

"I keep plenty. Problem is none of them are exactly personal - most of them are work-related."

"Surely you've got one personal secret."

"... I once lost a bet with Atem and had to wear lingerie under all my clothes for a month." He shrugged. "But that's about it. I'm a pretty open person."

Malik pursed his lips, making Yugi sigh again.

"... Fine. Fine." He averted his eyes and rubbed the back of his neck. "The only other one is that I really, really like it when someone speaks to me in Arabic. It just… Makes me really happy and I dunno why." He spoke in a rush, face heating. "There. That's it. That's the best I've got."

Malik had to bite back a laugh. "That's your darkest secret?"

"My darkest personal secret." He stuck his tongue out at him. "I told you, everything else is work-related."

"Anybody else know about that?"

"Just Yami and you guys." Yugi picked at a scab on his wrist. "Can we move past this now? You have no idea how embarrassing this is for me."

"Alright," Malik relented, in part because Yugi was the Pharaoh (whether it was just a title or not), and in part because, much as he loved teasing and tormenting, he wasn't just going to shit all over Yugi's happiness. "We'll have to make sure no one is listening in on this." He glanced toward the other room. "Unless we want Sage to know?"

"I can leave!" The young man popped his head out. "I don't want to be a liability to you, m'lords."

"Just… Plug your ears. Listen to music." Yugi waved a hand. "Pretend you can't hear us."

Sage's eyes lit up, though at which suggestion, Malik wasn't sure. He popped back into his room and there was a brief shuffling noise before everything went quiet. Then a click. Quiet music floated out of the room.

"Why not just have him leave?" Ryou raised a brow.

"He practically lives in that room." Yugi shrugged. "I'm still too nice to want to kick him out."

"Fair enough." Ryou turned to Malik. "So…?"

Malik sighed, but nodded. "Alright. Get cozy - this is a long story." He tried to force a smile. "And it's got visuals."

He shrugged off his cloak, then, and pulled his shirt over his head, turning to show them his back. Ryou had seen those carvings almost as many times as Marik had - they were entirely new to Yugi. The sharp gasp that escaped his mouth when his eyes landed upon them was testament enough to this fact.

Ignoring him, Malik began to tell them the story.

"3,000 years ago, the Pharaoh Akhenamkhanen's advisors convinced him to let them create the Millennium Items…"

As he explained their origins, explained the intricate Shadow Magic they held, the souls sacrificed for their power, Ryou finally felt the images on the other man's back connecting. They began to make sense. Each stroke and intricate pattern had a meaning, once you knew the story. It was incredible, really, but (not for the first time) he wondered how much it had to have hurt. He could barely imagine going through something like that…

And coming from a man who tended to do arguably worse things to himself at times, that was saying something.

When Malik finally finished speaking, he was very quick to turn his back toward the chaise and pull his shirt back over his head. His heart was pounding in his chest, though he did seem calm, outwardly.

He wondered if he'd ever get over the anxiety that showing his scars brought.

It wasn't likely.

He gave his companions ample time to let the story sink in before saying, "So, you can probably see why their nature is a closely guarded secret…"

Yugi and Ryou merely nodded in agreement. Why did their silence make him so uncomfortable? And why were they even being silent?

"Nothing to say?" He tried not to seem nervous about it.

"I'm just trying to wrap my head around the supernatural aspects of it." Yugi leaned back in his throne. "You mentioned a god of evil?" He shook his head. "That's just… A little much for me."

Malik relaxed and chuckled. "Hard to believe in gods, eh?"

"Sometimes. What was his name?"

Malik only shrugged. "I was never told. Names have power, you know."

"Zorc Necrophades." Ryou informed them. At the incredulous looks he received, he continued, "I'm an avid user of shadow magic, he's the literal creator of it. Any self-respecting mage knows their patron god's name, whether they actually serve them or not."

They continued to stare at him, which made him somewhat uncomfortable. He sipped his tea, which, by now, was getting quite cold. He tried not to gag - herbal tea wasn't meant to be consumed cold. It was meant to be consumed piping hot and for the most part unsweetened. He'd have to ask Sage to get him a new cup…

God, why were they staring like that?

"What? Is there something on my face?"

"You have a shadow wrapping around your arm." Malik informed him. "It looks like a hand."

He glanced down at his bicep, and, sure enough, there was a distinctly hand-shaped shadowy appendage curling its slender fingers around it. He sat the teacup down calmly and swatted the hand with some force. It recoiled immediately and dissipated into nothingness. Had it been attached to something, he probably would've gotten a dirty look or an offended scoff.

"Does that happen a lot?" Yugi asked, clearly hesitant.

"From time to time. Usually it's just tendrils." He tossed his head to move the hair out of his face. "Is there anything else we need to do, by the way? I feel the distinct need to leave for a while and hide my Items in a safer place. Maybe give one of them to one of you for safekeeping."

"Safest place is on your person," Malik sighed. "What ones do you even have?"

"The Ring and the Rod."

Malik's eyes widened. "So that's where the Rod went. Marik stole it from me when we first met and then he claimed it was stolen from him…"

"Bakura must have taken it." Ryou gave the weakest hints of an amused smile. "Would you like it back?"

"Yes." The Phantom King replied - too quickly. He cursed internally.

"Alright. Would you two be so kind as to accompany me to my house? I'd like to have company today."

"Sure." The Pharaoh agreed without a second thought.

Malik merely nodded.