Natasha doesn't entirely know what to believe about Loki. It is obvious, though, that there will be no help from Tony. And there might be from Bruce, so she leaves. She searches for a few days before she finds the island she is looking for. She touches down the quinjet and when she disembarks, someone familiar is waiting for her.
"Bruce."
"Hey, Nat."
She runs to him and hugs him, kisses him, runs her fingers through his hair. He lets her, but then gently pushes her back.
"I've missed you."
"I know. But you know I can't come back."
"Yeah. I do."
"So if you aren't here to convince me that the world needs Dr Banner, what are you here for?"
"To ask you something."
"OK, shoot."
"What is it like looking at your body and knowing it's not really the one you should be in?"
"Huh? Why do you want to know that?"
"Because we've got a guy...girl?...at the tower right now who is transgender. A shapeshifter. OK, a former shapeshifter. Loki. We've got Loki at the tower. And he used to just turn into a woman when his brain said he was one. But Odin cast him out and now he's no better than the rest of us. Lifespan. No magic. Same strength as any slightly emaciated 20 year old."
"That must really tear him up. And be hard on you guys."
"Wanda's been spending a lot of time with him. He tried to kill himself."
"I know what that's like."
"And none of us know anything about what it feels like to not be living in the right 'us'. I need you to tell me so I can figure out how to help him."
"You flew all the way out here to ask me that? A transgender blog wasn't good enough?"
"It's a crappy excuse to see you, but it worked."
He smiles and shakes his head, "There's nobody else with you?"
"No. Just me."
"OK. Let's go back to the hutt and we'll have a nice long talk."
And they do, but at first it is only polite plesantries. How the others are doing. What SHIELD has done since his departure. How Wanda, Sam, and Vision are adapting to life as Avengers.
But he finally does get to talking about himself and about what it feels like to live in the wrong body. It is not entirely analogous, though, as Bruce is more of a passenger in Hulk's body and mind than he is himself. But he tries.
"You can't just expect him to do this on his own, Nat. He'll kill himself. Or somebody else."
"Wanda's taking care of him when Thor's not around."
"But that's not going to be enough. He's going to need a community."
"Like what we were for you."
"Yeah. Science bros. And you figuring out how to tame the big guy. And Thor's attempt at being comforting...even when it was a total failure. Nick even asking me to be on the team. And Cap's perpetual encouragement. Even Clint letting us into his home. All these things told me you guys cared enough to deal with the rage."
"So what do we do for Loki? Tony's not exactly a prime example of sensitivity. And Cap's still a few decades behind trying to understand what 'transgender' is. Sam and James are listening and learning when Wanda talks, and you know Vision just cares about people living. But I don't know if he'll trust them. Right now, it's just Wanda."
"And what has she done that made him do that?"
"She treated him like a person. From the first minute he was in the tower. And when he tried to kill himself she ran to him and sat with him before the medics got there."
"And? Did any of you go to him after? Show him life was worth living?"
"Steve followed her and sat with him for a while. Wanda stayed up all night. Clint called Thor. Nobody else knew what to do. We can handle everbody trying to kill us, and we can handle killing the bad guys, but somebody committing suicide..."
"None of you've tried it."
"No."
"Only me."
"Yeah."
"And that's another reason you came to me. You need to know how to deal with that, too."
"I guess."
"You can't. It won't just get better. He won't be fixed in a day or two. You've got to teach him how to live with himself."
"But how do we even do this?"
He just sighs, "I think right now maybe you just need to let Wanda lead you in that. It sounds like she knows what he needs a lot better than the rest of you."
She doesn't like this answer, "But we have to be able to do something!"
"Nat, sometimes the best thing you can do is nothing. You guys haven't shown him you give a rat's ass about him yet. He's going to think something's up if you all suddenly want to get to know him."
"What do we do about the transgender thing?"
"You call him a him when he looks like a him and her when she looks like a her. How is this so hard?"
"Can you come back and help us?"
He shakes his head, "No. You're on your own. And that means you, like me, might be out of the picture."
They sit quietly for a little while as she tries to sort through this feeling of powerlessness. He makes tea and waits.
"Thank you, Bruce. Really. I don't have any idea what I'm doing and you're right. I just need to step back and let them lead. Just be available."
"And support her. Wanda's got a lot on her plate. She's going to need somebody to take care of her sometimes after she's done taking care of him."
"I can do that."
"There you go. Not everybody's going to be the hero all the time. Sometimes, we've got to be the guy keeping the hero going."
"I wish you'd let me be that for you."
"Sorry, I'm not the hero anymore. I'm not sure I ever was. I just destroyed stuff."
"You were a part of our team."
"Those days are over. But I'm grateful for them. Maybe someday I'll be back. But that's not what I need right now."
They spend a few more hours together before he walks her back to the quinjet, "Don't tell the others where I am, OK?"
"Anything you ask. I'll take that secret to the grave if you want me to."
"Thank you, Natasha."
She kisses his cheek and a few moments later, is in flight.