Kari stared at her ever growing stomach. She had not seen her feet in the seven weeks she had been placed on bed rest, even when she went for a bath or simple waddled to the bathroom, something she had felt utterly humiliated by, she could not see them. According to Frigga and Eir, it was completely normal, but that was little consolation to her. She was almost to full term and the baby was growing and thriving well, even if she felt as though she was going mad. Thor, Frigga and Loki had taken turns keeping her company, but overall she was sick of staring at the ceiling or the far wall.
Her body had become stronger, and thankfully, the baby showed little interest in coming early. A trait she jokingly accused it of getting from Loki when they were alone, so Eir believed she had little risk of perishing in childbirth. But that still did not permit her to leave the bed.
Luckily, she had convinced Loki to carry her to the window seat, which was large enough to take her, before he left her one afternoon, though she thought it only because she threatened to walk herself if he did not assist her. So it was there that Thor found her a short time later, sketching something she could see outside.
Ensuring he was at an angle that meant he was not looking at the drawing; he approached her. "How did you get over here, dare I ask?"
"I threatened to walk over if Loki did not carry me." She did not look up from the page at him as she continued to draw.
"You really should be in bed."
"I know, but I needed a change of view."
"What caught your attention?"
"You." Thor frowned. "I saw you walking in the gardens with Sif." She finally looked up from the page she was working on, a genuine smile on her face.
"We were just talking. She has been somewhat distant of late; I needed to find out why."
Kari laughed heartily. "Oh you blind, blind man." She stated sympathetically. "You really don't see it do you?"
"See what?"
"She is in love with you, she has been for years." Kari explained. "And since the announcement of the child, she has been heartbroken. That is why she is not the same around you, but happy and jovial around the others. Everyone can see it, everyone but you."
"But I…"
"Please do not feign disinterest Thor, I am well aware you feel something for her too." Kari laughed. "I have known for some time."
"I don't..."
"You do, stop denying it Thor. You need to finally admit it to yourself, please, accept it."
"But our marriage…"
"What of it? It is only really a marriage in name, is it not?" Kari shrugged. "Honestly, I don't mind."
"You don't…"
"Thor, I am not a good wife, in fact, I am an absolutely abysmal one." She acknowledged. "When I saw what was between you, I knew there was a way for me to at least try and make amends for my countless shortcomings."
"I don't understand."
"I love you, but not the kind of love a woman should have for her husband, I love you the same way now as I did when I was betrothed to Loki, like family, but not like my partner. I have realised just how much that difference mattered, so I did everything I could to push you away. I should never have tried to force myself to think differently, it was wrong, I only hurt you more then."
"Why?"
"I needed you to fall out of love with me."
"So the way you have acted, the way you have been so cold to me…"
"I hated doing it, I really did, but I had to, it was not fair on you."
"I still love you though."
"But not like before?" Thor shook his head. "Good, I care for you Thor, but not like that. I want you to be happy, but that could never be with me."
"I cannot believe I did not see all of it."
Kari looked at him sadly. "I am sorry for everything I have said and done against you Thor, though nothing I do will ever make up for it all."
"I don't know what to do about this now." He admitted, feeling a bit lost.
"Well whatever you do, try not to have something commissioned for her similar to something you had commissioned for me…again." Kari suggested. Thor stared at her. Kari leant towards him and half whispered, half laughed. "You had a bracelet you had made for me, made for her also."
"What?"
"Yep. The one for our fiftieth wedding anniversary, you gave one identical to her around the time of her eleven hundredth name's day."
"Oh Norn's, Kari I swear I did not realise it. I just had something made for her, I thought nothing more of it."
"I can tell." She laughed fondly.
"What about the child?"
"What about it?"
"Surely we should at least try, for its sake."
She shook her head as she answered. "We are better like this Thor. Forcing something in hopes of a miracle, it will not work. We were never meant for one another."
"It feels wrong."
"That is your sense of duty, you have always stuck to it, to even the detriment of your own happiness, but it does not mean that it is right."
"You have always been so wise, even though you are by far the youngest queen in all the realms."
"You are forgetting Midgard, their queens are usually only a few decades old."
"Midgard does not count, their life span is far different to our own."
Kari chuckled. She looked down at the sheet of paper on her lap. "I have been working on this all day." Thor said nothing, having learnt his lesson before not to expect her to share anymore than that with him. "It's for you." She passed it over to him.
Frowning; he slowly extending his hand, he took the sheet of paper, turning it towards him, his eyes widened. "Kari…" It was of him, in only a comfortable but intricately designed tunic and pants, sitting on the throne, Mjolnir under his hand, his facial expression was as though he was listening intently, and with a general air of calm exuding from him. "Kari, this is exquisite. I…I don't know what to say. Thank you."
"It is how I feel you should always see your rule. Do not try to imitate his one, you are different men. You are better than he could ever have hoped to be, because you care for those around you." She gently placed her hand on his arm. "I wonder sometimes, you know, if I had been always meant for you, would it have been different. I think perhaps, but then, I think not. It is one of those great questions we all have in our long lives, what are the other paths our lives could have taken."
"You sound more like an old woman on her death bed than a young soon to be mother." Thor commented.
"I am a mother with some time now, my child is simply not born yet."
"You know what I mean." Thor rolled his eyes.
She sighed, giving a small smile as she leant her head back and closed her eyes. "You have to be happy Thor."
"Kari?"
"Mmhmm."
"Are you alright?"
"Fine, just tired." She gave another small smile, closing her eyes again.
"Kari? Kari what is going on?" Thor dropped the sketch and got to his knees beside her. "Kari, please just wake up for a moment, just tell me, why are you talking like this?"
"Like what?" She murmured weakly.
"Like someone who is on their deathbed. Kari, do I need to get Eir?" She shook her head feebly. "Kari, think of the baby, if I need to get Eir, you have to tell me." He shook her slightly, but she was unresponsive. "No, Norn's no, please." Gently, he lifted Kari to the bed, settling her in it before going to the door. "Helena!" He called out. The maid came in immediately. "Get Eir, get mother, get Loki. Go, go." He ordered frantically.
The maid gasped as she realised something was terribly wrong with her mistress. With tears in her eyes, she turned, and bolted full speed to the healer. En route she collided painfully with Loki, who was walking with Frigga along the hall towards Kari's rooms. "What in Valhalla's name…?" Loki ceased talking when he saw the look on the maids face.
"Her Majesty…Eir…she…she…"
"Go, run." Loki ordered as he lifted the maid to her feet. "As fast as you can." Leaving his mother to run at her own pace, he rushed as fast as he could to Kari's rooms, blasting through the doors until he got to the bed chambers. "What the Hel?"
"She won't wake up." Thor tried to explain.
"What do you mean? What did you do?" Loki pushed him aside to take a look at Kari's pale face.
"Nothing."
A few moments later, Frigga arrived in and assessed her daughter in law. "The child…"
"What?" Thor asked looking between his mother and brother. "What?"
"How has she turned so quickly?" Frigga wondered aloud.
"Mother, the child, what of it?"
"It is still strong, it is protected."
"Then we may have to cut it from her." Eir stated as she entered the room and walked over, immediately assessing Kari before pulling back the covers. "I need you to leave the room." She ordered.
"I will stay." Frigga insisted. Eir looked at her for a moment, but nodded. Frigga turned to her sons. "I will stay with her. You must go." Reluctantly, they complied.
Outside they looked dumbfounded at one another for a few moments before Thor collapsed against a wall and broke down crying. Loki stood staring at his brother in utter shock. "What happened?"
"She…She drew something for me and gave it to me. She told me she only was the way she was with me so I would let go of my feelings for her, and accept my feeling for…"
"Sif?" Loki completed the sentence for him. Thor looked up at him. "Wow, I guess she was right, you were oblivious to it."
"Was I the only one not to realise?"
"Apparently yes." Loki nodded.
"She told me to be happy."
Loki frowned at him. "That does sound like something she would say. She has wanted to say it to you for some time."
"But it is the way she said it Loki, like it was the last thing she ever expected to say to me."
Loki swallowed hard, he wondered how Thor was able to weep, yet he could not, when in truth he was the one with everything to lose. He thought he would feel something at least, but it was then he realised, he felt nothing, he felt utterly numb. His body and mind would not accept what he knew was the truth. Kari, his beautiful, loving Kari, was seemingly dying. And their child, the proof of their love for one another, was at risk of the same fate. But he could not process it.
They waited, listening intently for the sound of anything that would give away the going-on's from within. But the longer they waited, the more quiet things became.
Finally, Frigga emerged almost ashen faced. Her sons rushed over to her. "Mother, what is it, tell us."