Chapter 14: Through the Looking Glass

Thankfully, Theo's love life was off the table the next day. But it was still a trial with an endless stream of witnesses and testimonies. "Did we call any witnesses?" he whispered to Josephine as another noble took the stand, called by Cyril de Montfort.

"I wasn't under the impression that we had to," she whispered back.

"So you agree that this is a crock of druffalo shit."

"Inquisitor!" she hissed, kicking him under the table, even as she tried to keep a smile on her face and her cheeks flushed.

Whatever wonderful things Duke Cyril's plants had had to say about the Inquisition, Arl Teagan was able to dismiss with his frosty glare and paranoia. "Master Dennett came to work as the Inquisition's horse master after the Inquisition secured the safety of the Redcliffe Farms region," Josephine said. Some of her conciliatory tone was gone: she too had nearly had enough. "He was not coerced, and he is compensated. If he'd like to return to Redcliffe he may. Otherwise we'd happily consult with him to find a replacement?"

"Dennett served my brother Eamon during the Blight, and supplied many of the mounts to Redcliffe's knights in the march on Denerim," Teagan said, and Theo closed his eyes so he didn't have to see the man's reddening face and bulging eyes.

"I will personally see that Dennett knows he's requested back in Redcliffe, and ask for his recommendations for a replacement at Skyhold," Theo said in the same even tone of voice Josephine used, only his words sounded slightly hollow and dead. At this point he was just trying to make people happy.

Even acquiescing to Teagan's demands wasn't going to be enough. "You marched into Ferelden believing you could do whatever you wanted-"

"I seem to recall a time when you were grateful for our presence and our aid," Theo said, sitting up straighter, his voice cold. "And since that time we've never made any sort of antagonistic move. If anyone is being antagonistic here, Arl Teagan, it's you."

Josephine groaned. Cassandra was trying not to smile, trying to hold her tongue and be neutral, and she caught his eye. She subtly shook her head and Theo sighed and slumped back again.

"The Inquisitor does have a point," Duke Cyril began, and that started off a shouting match across Cassandra. The Divine actually scooted her seat back from the table slightly so they didn't have to scream at one another across her miter.

Arl Teagan slammed his hat down on the table. "Ferelden has been occupied before, and I won't let it happen again on my watch." He glared down at Theo. "If you allow the Council of Heralds to have their way, they will turn you against us."

"You have a high opinion of Duke Cyril's ability to sway me," Theo said with a grin.

"Arl Teagan, I assure you once again that Orlais only means to serve in an advisory position to the Inquisition!" Cyril de Montfort protested.

Theo closed his eyes and clenched his throbbing hand close to him. All the emotions swirled around him like a large Fade rift. He kept his hand as hidden as possible, but it was quite likely that any moment the maelstrom of emotions would result in him tearing open the Fade right there in the middle of the room. Then what would the Exalted Council think of him?

He jumped when someone tapped his shoulder. A young woman in Inquisition livery slipped a rolled up note into his hand and darted away. Theo unrolled it. In Leliana's loopy scrawl she'd written, "Outside main gardens. Now."

Leliana wouldn't pull him out of this for no good reason. Even if he asked her to bail him out, she wouldn't have. He shoved his chair back and marched out of the room. Everyone was murmuring. Teagan was shouting something; Cassandra was groaning, Josephine was stammering apologies. But Theo couldn't even feel relieved at getting out of there. Anything that would have Leliana jeopardizing the trial-council, that was- had to be bad.

Theo all but ran down the pathways that led to the gardens, his heart pumping and his hand burning. He found Leliana with the Iron Bull, Krem, and Varric, who'd been appointed Viscount of Kirkwall last year and had come to the council to support the Inquisition. They looked up when he approached, but there were no smiles of greeting. Just the grim lines and hard stares of people who had seen too much, and were now seeing more of the same.

He knew it wasn't going to be good, but what he didn't realize was just how bad it truly was. Wordlessly he approached them and looked down at an oddly armored warrior: very out of place, and very dead. But none of his friends had weapons out. "I hope this is good, otherwise Ferelden may want my head on a pike," he said, but it came out shaky, not nearly as irritated as he wished he sounded.

"This is Qunari armor," Bull said, kneeling down. "Human. Viddathari." Bull rolled the body over to reveal a gaping, bloody wound in the torso. He looked behind him. "Guy bled out, and slowly, too. Footprints lead toward the trellises. Didn't want to start an investigation of something like this without you, Boss," he added, trying to smile.

So even Bull was worried.

Theo followed the bloody footprints, aware of Leliana, Krem, Bull, and Varric behind him. "How would a Qunari warrior get into the Winter Palace, without raising the alarm?" Theo asked. Smears of blood marred the white-painted trellises and drops of blood clung to the leaves and flower petals.

"That's why we called you," Varric said. "All this shit is weird-which may be the title of my next book-and you seem to be good at dealing with weird shit."

"Thanks, I think," Theo muttered. He grabbed the trellis and started climbing. He hauled himself up onto a landing and saw more bloody prints leading into a room. "Leliana, come see this," he called, and she climbed up without question. "The rest of you… find Dorian, Cullen, and Josephine and wait for us in my chambers. Sneak in the back ways, and only one or two at at a time so you don't draw attention."

Bull and the others complied without question. "He came from inside the Palace," Leliana said, following the prints with Theo. "He didn't just breach the defenses on the grounds."

He glanced over at her. Her blue eyes were narrowed and he could practically see the nugs running around in her head. "You're thinking something."

"I am. And I hope I'm wrong."

They entered a quiet, dusty storage room. Sheets and canvasses covered pieces of unused furniture, and a crumpled sheet on the floor had a bloody streak on it. It lay on the floor before a large mirror that showed no reflection.

"I'm not wrong," Leliana whispered and swore softly under her breath.

Theo felt icy and hot all at the same time. "How did an Eluvian get into the Winter Palace?" he asked, but neither he nor Leliana had any answers. He reached out his marked hand toward the glass; the green light did not shine back. He held his breath and touched the glass. The surface swirled and parted like watery curtains, showing a hazy land beyond. He reached through the glass and screamed as magic seared up his arm and into his shoulder and down his ribs. He collapsed to the floor, holding his arm to him and squeezing his eyes closed until he saw stars. He didn't realize he was trembling, rocking back and forth, until Leliana knelt beside him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders.

"It hurts," she murmured, holding his head to her shoulder.

"Worse than ever before," he admitted in a strangled voice. He shivered as the spasms of pain faded. "Andraste's arse, Leliana… I'm so tired," he admitted. He felt the tension leave his muscles as he slumped against her, as if admitting it had released something inside of him. He'd told Dorian his frustrations and reservations a thousand times or more. But for the rest of the world, including his closest circle of friends and advisors, he'd refused to show vulnerability. "I don't know if I can do this again," he whispered.

She held him at arm's length and searched his face. Theo bit his lip and clenched his fists, trying to quell the rising panic. "I have faced armies with You as my shield." She took his left hand, unconcerned by the flaring mark, and pushed back his sleeve. She rested her cool hand on the scars there. "Though I bear scars beyond counting, nothing can break me but Your absence," she finished.

He remembered the vision of a dark future, where Leliana had proclaimed she would not break. She had a faith that he didn't. And looking through the Eluvian, and at his sparking palm, he wondered if it was too late for that. "Let's meet the others," he said, wiping his eyes on his sleeve. "I'll be fine. I always am."

Leliana didn't question him. She helped him to his feet and they slipped through twisting hidden passages until they came to the one leading into Theo's room. They stepped out from behind the bookcase. Theo expected questions, but he didn't expect the stinging slap that Josephine landed across his cheek. "I deserved that," he said.

"How could you leave me there like that?" Josephine asked, her normally controlled voice tight and screechy. "How could you let him do that to me?" she asked Leliana, her amber eyes wide, nostrils flared, and her hands in fists at her side.

Bull stepped forward and explained the situation, and then Leliana told them about finding the Eluvian. Josephine had taken a seat on the edge of a brocade covered chair and seemed a bit more appeased upon hearing about this new turn of events, but Theo could see the wheels moving in her mind as she tried to figure out how she was going to stall the council. "So… are we going through that thing?" Bull finished. His jaw was set, his huge arms crossed over his chest, and his one eye watching Theo.

The last time Theo had felt truly small compared to the Bull was when they'd first met outside of Haven. Since then he rarely thought of Bull being a huge Qunari; he was just the Bull. Theo took a deep breath and flexed his hand. "Josephine, can you and Varric and Vivienne do some damage control around here?" Josephine nodded. "Cullen, make sure things remain secure. Leliana, get your scouts out and talk to Cassandra." He began unbuttoning his fancy coat and stripped down to the undershirt. He started rummaging for something more suitable to trekking into Maker-knew-where. "If the nobles want a show, they're going to get one."

"And us?" Bull asked, referring to himself, Krem, and Dorian.

"We're going through."

"Thought so."

Theo sighed. "If there was a dead Qunari warrior, I need to know why they're moving through Eluvians, especially if they hate magic so much, and there's nothing much more magical than an Eluvian." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, Bull."

"Don't be, Boss. I'd kind of like to know what the fuck's going on myself." Bull managed a smile and headed out to find Krem.

Everyone else left but Dorian. Theo sat on the edge of the bed, half dressed. "It will never be enough," he murmured.

He expected Dorian to tell him he was being silly, to dismiss it with a flippant comment and a light kiss. Dorian climbed onto the bed and sat behind him, and wrapped his arms around him. "No, it won't," Dorian said simply. He squeezed Theo, and Theo felt the magic buzzing just under Dorian's skin. He leaned back against Dorian. "I love you, Theodane Trevelyan," Dorian whispered, resting his head on Theo's shoulder.

"I love you too, Dorian Pavus," Theo said, taking one more moment to soak in Dorian's comforting warmth before he finished dressing, armoring up, and grabbing his bow.

Theo never would have found his way through the twisting hidden passages, so they stalked through the halls until he found the storeroom. Bull and Krem were waiting for them. "There may not be any turning back," Theo said after a moment of tense silence.

"There never was," Bull told him. The huge Qunari stared into the deep darkness of the mirror. His face was completely expressionless, which meant he was not happy about what he was about to find. Krem stood next to the Bull, his brow furrowed and hand on his sword hilt. He glanced over at Theo and nodded once to show he understood.

Dorian rested a hand on his shoulder and Theo felt the magic buzzing from his fingertips. It was reassuring. He took a deep breath and reached for the mirror with his marked hand. The darkness swirled around to reveal the world beyond. He glanced back to Dorian, Bull, and Krem one last time. "Are you with me?" he asked.

Bull and Krem nodded. Dorian smiled. "You ask the silliest questions."

It was just what he needed to take the first step through the Eluvian, to the world beyond.