Main Pairing: USUK
Rated M for later stuff. Cardverse and Omegaverse.
I own nothing. No copyright infringement intended.
Sorry it took so long, I got stuck on one part for a while and there's lots of stuff going on lately.
It took approximately fourteen minutes for Alfred to decide that histories were boring.
It was ironic considering that he had taken a class for the specific reason of studying history, but in archaeology you didn't have to memorize who the fifth king was and his favorite sport and what kind of food he like for dessert. You didn't have to know that the eighth jack's cousin once ran a man through with a sword because he didn't like his hairstyle. And you didn't have to memorize all of the battles Cards had ever been through.
"Alfred!" Arthur snapped, after Alfred had been spending a considerable time wondering if there would be any possibilities of hamburgers for lunch or not.
"Would you like to tell me what I just said?" Arthur said. Alfred cast his mind about. Something about... hamburgers? Wait no, that was what he had been thinking about.
"Umm..."
Arthur looked satisfied. "As I thought. Had you been paying attention, you would know that there have only been eleven female queens in the history of Spades, and only two female Kings. Why aren't you listening?"
Alfred rubbed the back of his neck. "I was thinking about hamburgers."
"Hamburgers?"
"Yeah..."
"What is a hamburgers?" Arthur asked, completely bewildered.
"Aw man, you don't even know what a hamburger is..." Alfred groaned, falling backwards to lay down. "They're my favorite food. So good..." he mourned the fact that he wouldn't get to taste one again until he returned home.
If he returned home.
"Perhaps, if you teach us, we could try to make one?" Arthur suggested tentatively. Alfred shot back up.
"You'd do that? Really?" Arthur seemed taken aback.
"If it is something we can do, it'd be nice for you to be able to focus on your studies instead of... hamburgers." he said.
Alfred laughed. "Oh, man. If you guys had hamburgers here, I wouldn't be able to think about anything else. Sorry."
Arthur smiled. "Let's take a break and go down to the kitchen. We'll see if we have what we need."
"Well, you'll need a burger, for one," Alfred started excitedly as they left the study. "It's like a flat patty of meat, usually beef, and you cook it. And then you need lettuce, and pickles, and tomatoes, and cheese. Oh and the buns. Those are bread, but they're a different shape than just a loaf."
"Hmm," Arthur said. He looked genuinely interested in what Alfred was saying.
When Alfred bounded through the kitchen door, followed by Arthur, the servants all looked up and smiled. When they saw Arthur, one spoke to him as Alfred looked around.
"Here to bake today, your Highness?" Alfred giggled.
"You bake?" Alfred said.
"Yes, what of it?" Arthur snapped. "Now, I hope we have most of what you need. You'll have to show me how to do it."
"Here is where we keep the beef," Arthur said, retrieving a piece. "Is this enough?"
"Yeah, but we're gonna need to ground it."
One of the servants ran up. "Here, let me."
As he ground the beef, Alfred and Arthur collected the other ingredients needed. It turned out that they did have buns, except they were called scones and they weren't sliced.
"Now what should I do with this?" The servant asked, holding up the perfectly ground meat.
"Perfect!" Alfred said. "Give it here. How do your ovens work?" He said, going into commando mode. He was going to dominate this kitchen.
"Here," the servant said. He got the ancient ovens working and they cooked the meat into a couple of patties.
Arthur watched curiously, almost fearfully, as Alfred expertly sliced the scones he'd been provided with in half. There had been enough meat for five burgers. He quickly sliced the tomatoes and cheese as well. There hadn't been any pickles, but there was lettuce. He assembled the burgers with an impressive display. When they were finished, Arthur was in awe. The servants were as well, but Alfred was looking for Arthur's reaction.
"Now we eat them, and find out if my cooking's poisonous," Alfred said, grinning. He took up one of the hamburgers and sank his teeth into it.
It was perfect.
"Oh, man," he said after swallowing. "I am so good. I have saved your entire world from lack of hamburgers."
Arthur poked at one of the burgers curiously. "This is..."
"Try it!" Alfred urged. Arthur picked the burger up, mimicking Alfred.
"Will this really fit in my mouth?" Arthur asked.
Alfred snickered at the innuendo. "Of course, if you try hard enough," he replied.
Arthur avoided his eyes, instead choosing to take a small bite out of the hamburger. His eyes widened as he chewed.
"Do you like it?" Alfred asked. Arthur simply looked at him with those huge, jade green eyes. They were filled with all of the wonder in the world and Alfred hoped that the shake in his knees wasn't noticeable.
Arthur took another bite, and then turned to the servants and pointed to the remaining burgers. "Try them," he insisted.
"This has got to be a regular meal in the castle," Arthur said.
Alfred simply smiled.
The next few days were hard on Alfred's brain, but he learned much. It wasn't until the third day after the coronation that anything particularly out of the blue happened.
Alfred was sitting in the little garden where he had first talked with Arthur, playing absentmindedly with his hands. He had been staring at the small face for a good ten seconds (which is a very long time when you count it out) before he actually realized it was there.
Alfred let out a very unmanly shriek and jumped backwards, tipping his chair over. His coat went flying everywhere.
Alfred flailed his arms for a moment, quickly backing away from the small boy. The boy that was completely clear.
"Oh my god!" Alfred yelled. "Oh my god!"
"Calm down, mister," the boy said. "I know I'm scarier than my brother but this is just insulting."
"You're brother?" Alfred asked, holding a hand to his chest.
"Ya," the kid said. "Arthur."
"Arthur is your brother?" Alfred asked, slowly recovering.
"Mmhmm!" The boy said. He turned around and ran to the side of a tall, lean guy... who was also see through. The two did have a sort of faded coloring to them... but the color of their eyes was bright. What really freaked Alfred out was that the older one's eyes were red.
"Who are you?" Alfred asked.
"I am me," the tall one said. "I'm surprised you didn't know. But then again, most people don't get lucky enough to meet a joker in their lifetime."
Alfred slowly stood, pulling the chair up with him. "A... joker?"
"Yeap," he said. "The name's Gilbert. Gilbert Beilschmidt. A full five foot ten and every inch is made of awesomeness."
"You're five foot nine, Gil," the little boy reminded his friend. "I'm Peter, by the way."
"Ah," Alfred said, albeit delicately. He felt a bit light headed. "Well, I'll be going now..."
"So soon?" Peter said, looking so sufficiently heartbroken that Alfred paused.
"Yes, well..."
"Don't worry about him, Peter," Gilbert said, dismissing Alfred. "Can't you see? He's scared of me. I must be too much for his presence to take in."
Peter scoffed, and the two stopped paying attention to Alfred as they passed friendly banter and teasing back and forth. Alfred escaped into the hall, pulling his glasses off and wiping them on his pants. His vision was blurred, but he could make out a person walking towards him before he slipped them back on. The person turned out to be Arthur.
Alfred caught a clear whiff of his scent as he approached, and for some reason, it affected him nearly as badly as the first time he'd smelled it. With constant exposure to Arthur, he thought he should have gotten used to it...
Alfred clenched his fists so hard his nails were digging into his skin. He unconsciously took a half step forward before attempting desperately to restrain himself - but really, what did that matter? What was holding him back? Alfred was an omega, that meant he had the right to claim any omega he wanted.
No, brain, snap out of it. Just because he's there doesn't mean he's yours, Alfred reminded himself. He took a deep breath meant to calm him down - bad choice. All it did was fill Alfred with more of Arthur's sweet scent -
"Alfred!" Arthur cried as Alfred felt himself fall against the wall.
Arthur hovered over him, worried.
"No - "Alfred said. "Back off, Arthur!"
Arthur retreated from his side. "What? What's wrong? You got really pale and you were shaking and then you just fell!"
"I am aware," Alfred growled. "You don't have to point out my weaknesses to my face, you know."
It took a moment for Arthur to respond. "What?"
Alfred shook his head, trying to clear it. "Nothing. I'm sorry. I just -"
He couldn't find the words. He hurried past Arthur and started heading in the direction of his new rooms.
Alfred was tired of restraining himself. No matter what he did, he couldn't figure out whether Arthur had an interest in him or not. Sure, they hadn't known each other for very long, but now that Alfred's body was different, he was getting impatient. His changed senses told him that it shouldn't be this hard, his very genes screamed at him to turn around and claim Arthur as his right there, in that very hallway. But Alfred kept walking until he couldn't. He sank to the floor just outside the doors to his quarters and drew his knees in, hugging himself.
There, Alfred fell asleep.
The next day was the first time Alfred tasted Arthur's cooking. Arthur had created his very own hamburger to present to Alfred. And Alfred was put into a rather awkward situation, because Arthur was a terrible cook. The burger was nearly burned to a crisp.
"I don't think you got it quite right," Alfred said after forcing a bite down. "I'll help you learn how to do it sometime, okay?"
Arthur nodded, frowning. "We could do it now. I'm not busy."
Alfred laughed. "All right."
Alfred discovered Arthur's problem when they were cooking the burgers.
"Arthur, I think they're ready," Alfred said, checking the oven.
"No, they're not." Arthur said tersely.
Alfred was surprised. "You like them darker?" He asked. He hadn't really thought that that would have been Arthur 's style.
"No, it's simply not done yet," Arthur said.
Alfred took the burgers out. "If you keep them in too much longer, they burn," he said. "They get dry and tough."
"That's what everyone says!" Arthur barked out. "But if you don't cook it enough, people get sick from it!"
Alfred stared at Arthur.
So the reason everyone cringed at Arthur 's terrible food was because he didn't want them to get salmonella?
"Arthur, sweetie," Alfred said. "People won't get sick if the food's as cooked as this is. It's only dangerous if you don't cook it barely at all."
Arthur scowled. "Yet somehow my brother still got sick from cooked foods."
Alfred blinked. "You mean Peter? He got sick?"
"How do you know about Peter?" Arthur asked.
"Well... I met him,"'Alfred said, confused by Arthur's tone.
"You met him?"
"Yeah, him and another guy named Gilbert." Alfred conveniently refrained from mentioning how much the encounter had freaked him out.
"The jokers visited," Arthur mused. "And they didn't stop by to see me?"
"The jokers?" Alfred asked. "What are they?"
Arthur shrugged. "No one really knows. It's a very precise and rare bit of magic. One can only become a joker if they are dying."
"Ohh..." Alfred said. "So when your brother got sick..."
Arthur sighed in defeat. "As he died, the healer who was tending to him brought in a powerful warlock without my knowledge and transformed him. Now I rarely see Peter. When I do, I am glad that he still remains, even if his appearance never ages. It has been three years and he still looks the same."
"Huh," Alfred said. He didn't know what else to say after that.
Arthur turned away. "I suppose that's enough for today. I must go check on Yao."
"Yeah, where has he been?" Alfred asked, following Arthur out of the kitchen. "I haven't seen him for a while."
"He has fallen ill," Arthur answered, almost angrily. "If you wish, you may come and see firsthand when an omega is ravaged by heartbreak."
Yao didn't look very good. He was pale, dark shadows under his eyes. He coughed a couple of times a minute.
"How are you?" Arthur asked. "Has it gotten any worse?"
Yao shook his head. From a side door, Li Xiao entered with a basin of water and a cloth. "His fever has not broken yet," Li Xiao said.
Arthur nodded.
"What's wrong with him?" Alfred asked curiously.
"He bonded with an alpha," Arthur replied. "And that alpha left him to rot. This is what I told you about, Alfred. Even if it happens accidentally, like in this case, omegas can't trust alphas like this. It's too dangerous."
Alfred felt his heart squeeze. Arthur didn't think alphas could be trusted? Understandable, but not even him? Well then, Alfred would have to prove him wrong.
Arthur glanced at Alfred. "Sometimes things work out," he amended. "But it's just too risky in my opinion."
Alfred squinted, a new thought striking his brain. "Do alphas ever get sick when their omegas leave them?"
Arthur glared at Alfred. "Omegas can't leave their alpha. If they bond, they bond for life. Alphas bond, but not like that. If they leave an omega they can just find another one. Just another unfair advantage alphas have."
Alfred looked once again at the sickly Yao. "Who would do that?" he questioned. "What kind of person would..."
Alfred became aware of Arthur's eyes on him, but he refused to meet them. He turned to leave just as another servant entered the room.
"Your Highness," he said. "A letter has just arrived."
"Hand it here," Arthur said tiredly. Alfred quickly backed out of the path of the messenger.
After a quick scan of the page. Arthur summarized it to the room. "The Hearts Kingdom has found their Jack. They're inviting us to join them in celebration in three days."
"Wow," Alfred said. "How long have they been looking?"
"Only a few months," Arthur replied absentmindedly. "Such short notice... oh..."
Alfred slipped out. Was he ready for another social gathering? Yao and him had mostly focused on the coronation. Did he have the skill to get through this without embarrassing himself? True, Alfred planned to start a chain reaction of less uptight regulations when it came to how royalty must act, but that didn't mean that everyone else would accept a complete lack of formality right from the get-go.
The tight schedules and busy days returned. It was decided that Yao would not be accompanying them to Hearts, as he was weak and needed rest. Yao protested, insisting that he needed to stay with Arthur, but eventually he backed down.
Arthur told Alfred that they'd be staying for a few days. He helped Alfred pack and they both shared a large trunk for their things. A couple of times, Alfred's heart flickered as Arthur's hand brushed his. And Alfred wasn't completely sure why, but for some reason, Arthur's scent smelled sweeter to him after that day.
"Arthur?" Alfred asked. Arthur was sitting in a chair out in his little garden with the swing, sipping liquid from a teacup. Alfred kept his toes inside the door frame, leaning out just a bit into the open air. "Hey, Arthur? When did you say we were leaving again?"
Without turning around, Arthur responded (and Alfred could just see his eyes closing in exasperation).
Sure enough, his tone was exasperated when he said, "I've told you six times now, we're leaving in a couple of hours. They're preparing the ships now."
Alfred waited a moment. He was a bit apprehensive about this trip, but as silly as it sounded, he didn't want Arthur to think he was a crybaby.
"Arthur?"
"Mmm," Arthur replied. His voice sounded considerably warmer than it had just a few moments ago.
"I've never actually traveled on a ship before. Or a boat."
This caused Arthur to swivel around, astonished. "Never? How do you get around at all in your world?"
"We fly," Alfred said, rubbing the back of his neck.
Arthur's eyes went wide for a moment. Then he narrowed them in suspicion. "Not even our magicians can make people fly."
"It's not magic. It's science," Alfred said earnestly. "I don't know exactly how it works, but I can tell you the basics..."
When Alfred finally explained airplanes to Arthur in a way he could understand... Arthur was amazed. He wanted to work on building one right away. Alfred told him not to get his hopes up. "You'd be better off starting with the original plane made by the Wright brothers. Or something like that."
Arthur looked at him for a moment. "Huh?"
"Never mind," Alfred said. He had enough on his plate without trying to teach Arthur the entire history of Earth.
"I want to make this air-plane," Arthur said. "It sounds faster than a boat."
Alfred ran his hand through his bangs, holding them against his head. "I wouldn't be able to help you very much. I study pots and amulets and suits of armor, not planes."
Arthur shook his head. "I do not care. We will make an airplane. Even if it takes a while."
"Aren't you ambitious," Alfred teased.
A servant poked their head into the room. "The ships are ready to sail, Your Highnesses.
"Thank you, Kasem," Arthur said. "Come, Alfred, let's go."
Alfred followed Arthur out to the ships.
The transcriber's note: An apology is due. This segment of the story has been cut out. The client has refused to give me the information as to what occurred no matter how hard I pleaded. His amused partner mentioned something about "embarrassing tales" and "sick to his stomach," but also refused to spill the beans. The journey to Hearts' port remains, for now, a mystery.
"Hey, Alfred," Arthur said, settled on the large cushy bed. "What are we supposed to do? They only gave us one bed."
Alfred shrugged. He was honestly fine with sharing a bed with Arthur - a part of him was leaping at the chance. But he wasn't sure if Arthur would want that.
"I could always pull some blankets down on the floor," Alfred offered.
Arthur looked personally offended. "Please. You are a King. I am not going to bloody let you sleep on the floor."
"No, really," Alfred said earnestly, taking a blanket from the pile next to the bed. He laid it out on the soft carpet as he spoke. "I do it all the time back home. When we were kids, my brother and I used to-"
Alfred broke off suddenly. In the time that he'd been here, in all of the time that he'd been here, he had nearly forgotten about Matthew. How could he? His goal was to get back to his home - right? He wanted to get back home, back to the pretty girls and the parties and the late night study sessions and the checkups on his brother. He had to find that door...
But Arthur...
"Alfred?"
Alfred took in a deep breath. "I'm sorry." He cleared his throat and continued. "I haven't seen my brother for a while, even on earth. It's been nearly two years... he got sick on Christmas and I was busy over spring break. You probably didn't understand most of that last sentence. But anyways, my brother and I used to sleep on the floor a lot because the mattress on our bed was really hard. And when we got older and we didn't live together anymore, I slept on the floor when I had friends stay over. So I'm used to it. Really."
Arthur took a breath, and he opened his mouth to say something, but then he stopped. He retreated back into himself and looked away. "If you really want to," he said softly.
After they had arrived in Hearts, they had greeted only Kiku, as Ludwig and their new Jack had stepped out for a moment to speak to some servants. Then a servant who had introduced himself as Muhammad led the two to a large room in the guest quarters. Their trunk had arrived a short while after, carried by Muhammad and another servant. He and Arthur had spent a bit of time examining their surroundings - the decorations were mostly in shades of red and warm browns. That was when Arthur had climbed onto the bed.
"We have a whole day before the ceremony," Alfred said after a while, lying on the floor and staring at the ceiling.
"Try not to get lost," Arthur said mockingly.
"Ha ha," Alfred returned. "Maybe I'll just sleep all day. That would be nice."
"We have to make appearances," Arthur said. Alfred looked up at him. He was making a face.
"Why?"
"What?"
"Why do we have to make appearances?" Alfred said, sitting up and leaning back on his forearms. "You could stay in bed to, we could have breakfast in bed, lunch in bed, sleep, talk, sleep more, do nothing... ahh," Alfred sighed. "It sounds glorious."
Arthur let out an unwilling chuckle, surprising Alfred. "One of us has to be responsible," he said uncertainly.
"Nahhh," Alfred said. "We could do whatever we wanted in here and no one would know any better! Oh, jeez," he said as an afterthought. "That sounded wrong."
This time, Arthur let out a full blown laugh, though he stifled it right away. His eyes were dancing.
Alfred laid back down, settling his palms beneath his head. He took his glasses off and reached up, pushing them over the edge of a desk and onto a safe flat surface. "I'm going to fall asleep."
"You do that."
"Could you get the lamp?"
"Are you sure you don't want to sleep on the bed?"
Alfred rose his eyebrows. Arthur was sitting on the side of the bed, buttoning up his long nightshirt. Alfred caught a sliver of Arthur's pale chest before it disappeared behind the white cloth. He licked his lips as though they were dry.
"Are you insinuating inappropriate things, your Highness?"
"What!?" Arthur exclaimed. "Alfred!"
Alfred grinned. "If you don't want to wait until tomorrow, I'm perfectly happy to - ow!" Alfred's hand shot up to his head, rubbing at the spot where Arthur's hard shoe had hit. "Okay, if you had thrown a pillow, I'd have just laughed some more," Alfred said. "But that actually hurt. Your shoes are like books."
"I wanted it to hurt," Arthur said very quietly, almost ashamed. "You should know by now how I feel about..."
"Oh," Alfred said. "I was just teasing."
"I know, I'm sorry. It just makes me uncomfortable." Arthur said. "I shouldn't have thrown a book-shoe at you."
"I shouldn't have teased. I guess it was a little over the line."
Arthur took in a deep breath. "I'm not an immature teenager who doesn't know how to talk about important things. So I'll just bloody say it... Ever since you've got here, I've been attracted to you, Alfred. I like you. I want you to stay. But I promised myself... no bonding. Ever. It's too dangerous."
Alfred was shocked. "I had no idea," Alfred said. "I thought you hated me at first. Then I thought you just didn't like how I showed up out of nowhere and took over Spades. Even though I don't even really do anything. Then... I don't know what then."
"Appearances," Arthur said. He slipped down onto the floor. "It really is all about appearances, isn't it. Alfred, maybe if things were different I could be... different. I don't know. But the last time I thought someone was right for me, right enough for me to break all of my rules, I nearly got killed because of it."
Alfred slowly scooted over to Arthur's side, leaning against the bed with him, not touching, but close. "Do you want to talk about it at all? It might help if I know what happened. It might help me understand."
"I don't like talking about things," Arthur said, sighing. Rubbing his eyes. "I... I'll just give you the short version. I found an alpha, a guy, that I really liked. And we just... we fit together. He was always sweet and he took care of me. I didn't know him long enough to bond with him, but I was getting close. And then... I caught him with a girl. After that I started hearing all sorts of stories about how much of a player he was, how sweet he would seem and how in love and then... then. As soon as he got in your pants he was gone."
"Wait - but didn't he know how that kills omegas?" Alfred asked, aghast.
Arthur shrugged. "They were mostly rumors, if that makes you feel better."
Alfred frowned deeply. "I want to punch this guy."
"Well, you were quite chummy with him at the coronation," Arthur muttered.
Alfred's brain pinwheeled. "Wait - I met the guy?"
Arthur glanced at him. "Yes."
Alfred cast his mind back to the party... immediately a single moment stood out to him. Arthur, glaring, the background blurred. The King of Diamonds with his arm around Alfred's shoulders...
"Francis?" Alfred asked quietly. Arthur immediately tensed, lips pursing. It drew Alfred's attention to them. They looked soft. He wondered what it would be like to kiss them. He wanted to try.
"Arthur," Alfred said, in the same quiet way. He knee brushed Arthur's, and neither of them pulled away. "I like you too. I didn't tell you that, but I guess I was kinda hinting at it for a while. And I want you. A lot. But if it makes you uncomfortable, I can... not do things with you. I can try to make it easier on you. I'll keep my distance as best as I can."
Arthur sighed, and this time it sounded so delicate and heartbreaking that Alfred wanted to curl up and hug Arthur and shower him with little kisses until he laughed again.
"We should sleep," Arthur said.
"I know," Alfred said. Neither of them moved.
Eventually, Alfred slid to the ground, getting into a more comfortable position. The ache in his back eased immediately. He was drowsy, drifting off to sleep. But he remembered the warmth of Arthur's body curling against his back.