So, I realized there is something I should have been doing but haven't; SHOUTOUTS! These are the shoutouts for all of the chapters so far, and from now on I will do them for each chapter.
Cesergarciadiaz99- I don't think I'm going to do that, but thanks for the idea. If you want, you can borrow Willow and write the story yourself. Thanks for the review!
Suntan140- Thanks for both reviews. As for Willow/Robbie, that's just a guy likes a girl because he thinks she's hot. It's nothing majorly serious.
Psychochiken- Thanks for both reviews and your advice. I cannot wait for you to release your story. I'll be looking out for it.
Kingdom Hearts Slayer- Thanks for your review!
HowAboutThat- Thanks for the review! Originally, Willow wasn't going to be creepy, but one of my friends pitched that idea to me and it fit perfectly.
Pine Tree- Billow probably won't happen, but Bill WILL appear more times than he does in the show, so be ready! Thanks for the review!
Ajjr12- Ecodisamatic disorder is not a real disease. It's just something I made up. Thanks for the review!
Gamelover41592- Thanks so much for all your reviews and complements, and I'm glad you liked the Willex relationship.
Saul'keth- Thanks for the review! That's what I was going for; Willow seeming like she was in the show the whole time. I feel that if you focus too much on your OC's, that takes away from the original creation. And your right; Alex will be in Weirdmaggeddon.
Lula bear- I'm glad you love the story so much. Thanks for the review!
Disclaimer: I only own Willow. Everything else in the show belongs to Alex Hirsch and the GF team.
Mabel's POV (June 25th)
Dipper, Willow, and I were in the back of Stan's car. We were going into town against our will to pick up groceries since the party last night had pretty much wiped out all of our food. A Doctor Who marathon was on when he dragged us out of the shack. The only plus side was he had bought us nachos to keep us quiet. I grabbed two nachos and put them on my ears, leaving them hanging there. "Nacho earrings. I'm hilarious!" I said, finishing my bag.
"That's debatable," Stan said from up front, honking his horn. Willow pulled a nacho out of her bag and started staring at it.
"This looks like that triangle demon from the journal," she said, showing Dipper her nacho. He pushed it away from himself.
"Willow, don't joke about that guy. He gives me the creeps. If, hypothetically, he comes back, code word is nachos, understood?" He asked. Willow nodded and ate her nacho, me forgetting about that conversation. Grunkle Stan honked his horn a few more times, then started yelling.
"Come on, what's with all this traffic? And why is it all… covered wagons? Hot Belgian Waffles, not today!" He hit the gas and spun the car around, driving way too fast. He slammed the brakes and barley avoided hitting a few women who were dressed in old timey clothes.
"Grunkle Stan, what's going on?" Dipper asked as Stan started driving backwards.
"We gotta get outta here, before it's too late!" Stan yelled, slamming the brakes again. There were covered wagons going all around the car. "They've circled the wagons! We're trapped! NOOOOOOO!" I looked out the window and saw a cow staring at us.
"I've got a good feeling about today," I said to Dipper and Willow, all of us getting out of the car. Dipper pulled an old photo out of his pocket and held it up, the three of us looking at it, then at the town. Main Street was decorated all old-timey, water barrels, hay bales, and covered wagons everywhere. Women were wearing bonnets and aprons, the men dressed in overalls and brown flannel.
"Grunkle Stan, why does it look like we stole TARDIS and traveled back 200 years?" Willow asked when Stan had gotten out of the car. He started rubbing the bridge of his nose, shaking his head.
"It's Pioneer Day," Stan mumbled. He noticed the confused looks on our faces and elaborated. "Every year these yahoos dress up like idiots to celebrate the day Gravity Falls was founded. It makes me want to kill them even more than I already do." Toby Determined came up to us holding a Pioneer Day sign.
"Welcome to 1862!" He said, smiling.
"I will break you little man!" Stan yelled at him, making Toby run away and crash into some barrels. We started looking around. Adults were helping kids do a bunch of different activities.
"Look, candle dipping!" Willow said as a woman took three candles out of a barrel of wax.
"Gold panning!" Dipper said, pointing at McGucket who was helping kids look for gold. There was a priest marring a man and… a woodpecker?
"What chu talkin' 'bout?" I asked aloud as the man left the alter, the woodpecker on his shoulder. Dipper took the journal out of his vest and flipped to some page.
"In Gravity Falls it used to be legal to marry woodpeckers," He said, putting the journal back.
"Seriously?"
"It's still legal, very legal," the woodpecker guy said from behind us.
"And I thought these people were messed up before," Willow said, watching the guy walk into a house.
"Come one, come all to the opening ceremonies!" Someone said over the loudspeakers. The entire crowd started going to the fountain in the center of town. We started following them, then realized Grunkle Stan hadn't moved.
"Grunkle Stan, you coming?" I asked turning around. Stan started walking back to the car.
"No thank you! But remember, if you kids come back to the Shack talking like these people, you're dead to me," he said, opening the door.
"There's a carpetbagger in the turnip cellar!" Dipper said.
"Well hornswabber my haversack!" I replied. The three of us spit on the ground and ran towards the center of town.
"DEAD TO ME!" Stan called after us, honking the horn. The town had set up a stage in the middle of the road and the people were gathered around it. Dipper, Willow and I made our way to the front of the crowd. On stage were Sheriff Blubs, Durland, and Pacifica and her family.
"Here-ye, here-ye!" Blubs said, talking into a microphone. "Ye olde commencement ceremony is about to commence." Durland ran on stage ringing a bell like a maniac.
"Police, my purse!" Someone yelled from the crowd. Instead of doing anything, Durland just continued to ring the bell. They backed up and Pacifica took their place.
"Howdy everyone! You all know me, Pacifica Northwest, great-great granddaughter of town founder, Nathaniel Northwest. I'm also very rich," she said, everyone clapping. "Now, if you've got the pioneer spirit, we ask you to come up here and introduce yourself."
"Audience participation!" I said excitedly. I started walking on stage, but Willow stopped me.
"I don't know about this Mabel. After last night, isn't that girl kind of like your arch enemy?" She asked me. I shook my head, still smiling.
"We just got off on the wrong foot. It'll be fine," I said, running onstage.
"Our first newcomer is… Mabel…" Pacifica said angrily.
"Yeah! Let's get this Pioneer Day started! Right guys? USA! USA!" I said, everyone chanting USA.
"I'm sorry to break it to you, but Pioneer Day is for serious people and you look and act ridiculous," Pacifica said, looking at my sweater. "I mean, a puppy playing basketball? Are you always this silly?" Normally someone calling me silly wouldn't bother me. I'm a goof, I know that, I admit it, and I'm proud of it. But for some reason when Pacifica said it, it got to me.
"I can be serious," I said, glaring at her.
"You do have nachos hanging from your ears, hon," she said. I touched the nachos and blushed. "I'm embarrassed for you. Give her a hand everybody!" Everyone started clapping again, but it was a pity clap, not an honest one. "Now who wants to hear more about me?" Pacifica said as I ran off the stage. I cut through the crowd and started walking past some of the booths that were set up.
"You okay?" Willow asked from behind me, Dipper grabbing my arm. I just kept walking.
"I need some old-timey butterscotch," I said. Willow nodded and ran to the butterscotch line. Dipper followed me to the steps in front of a statue of Nathaniel Northwest. Why I went there, I had no idea, but no one was around so it was perfect. Willow came up a few minutes later with a bag of butterscotch in her hand. I took the bag and put one in my mouth.
"Guys, do you think I'm silly?" I asked them.
"Uh, nnnoooo?" Dipper said slowly.
"I knew it!" I yelled, standing up and pacing. "The nacho earrings, the sweater. I thought I was being charming, but I guess people see me as a big joke."
"Mabel, calm down. Everyone's silly sometimes. What's the big deal?" Willow asked me. I stopped pacing and looked at her.
"I don't know. I guess I want people to know that I'm not just a goof off. That I can be normal sometimes too," I took the nachos off my ears and threw them on the ground, then took off my sweater and wrapped it around my waist.
"Come on Mabel. You love that sweater!" Dipper said as I sat back down.
"I used to before Pacifica ruined it for me. She ruins everything!"
"Pacifica!" Dipper said, standing up and looking at the statue. "Why does she think that being related to the town founder means she can treat everyone like garbage. It's just not right. Someone needs to take her down a peg."
"I don't know why, but it definitely isn't right. If only… wait a minute," Willow stopped and turned to Dipper, an excited gleam in her eyes. "Dipper, journal now." Dipper looked confused but took the journal out anyway. Willow turned to me and explained what was going on. "I read something in the journal about Pacifica's great-great grandfather," She said, taking the journal from Dipper. She opened to some page and started reading.
"'In my investigations I recently made a discovery. Nathaniel Northwest may not be the true founder of Gravity Falls! I believe the secret is hidden somewhere in the enclosed document. If only I could crack the code…'" Willow took an old piece of paper out of the journal and opened it. There were a bunch of weird looking symbols on it. Willow smiled, the gleam in her eyes even brighter. Dipper took the paper form her and started looking at it.
"If this cover up is true, it means Pacifica's whole family is a fraud. This could be a major conspiracy! Willow, we gotta go investigate this!" Dipper stood up and they were about to leave, but I stopped them.
"Wait guys. I'm coming with you. Conspiracies are serious, right?"
"Definitely," Dipper said, getting a gleam in his eye.
"If I help you guys crack the code nobody could ever call me silly again!"
"Awesome! Pines Inc.?" Dipper said, holding out his fist.
"I thought you hated that," Willow said, putting her fist in.
"I'm starting to accept it," Dipper said. I stood up, put the butterscotch bag in my shirt (What? Their built in pockets!) fist bumped them, and all of us ran towards the Gravity Falls library.
GFF
Man, this town is messed up! When we walked into the library, Old Man McGucket was giving some little kids a history lesson. I thought it was sweet at first, but then I heard what McGucket was saying.
"Back in the olden days, pioneers drew subsistence from telling stories 'round the fire. So let's eat some books children! Go ahead, eat the books!" He said, chewing on the corner of one. Dipper, Willow and I went to the back of the library. Dipper was setting up a projector, Willow was looking for slides of old languages, and I was looking for books of the same thing. I walked over to Dipper and put the books I found on the table, then started looking through them. Willow came over a minute or two later with some old slides in her hand.
"Alright, if we can prove Nathaniel Northwest wasn't the real founder of Gravity Falls, it will finally put Pacifica in her place," Willow said, giving Dipper the slides.
"And solving a mystery will prove that I'm not silly. I'm serious, seeeeriousss…" I said, putting another butterscotch in my mouth. Dipper put the slides in the projector and turned it on.
"We just need to crack the code. Let's see… not Egyptian… not numerology… not- Wait! The triangle is the alchemist symbol for flame. Lighting the parchment on fire will reveal the secret message!" Dipper put the paper on the table, then he and Willow started trying to find a candle. I got bored so I grabbed the paper and folded it into a hat, then put it on my head. "Let's light this sucker up and- Mabel!" Dipper turned around with a candle in his hand, then saw my hat.
"Wop! I just made a hat!" I said. Willow face-palmed and I realized what I had done. "Damn, I just did something silly again!"
"Wait a minute," Willow said, her face lighting up. "Mabel, you folded it into a map! And we were gonna burn it…"
"We're on the lookout for three kids who might be reading," Someone said from the front of the library. Willow looked out from behind a bookshelf, motioning for us to be quiet.
"We're huntin' 'em down for secret reasons!" Someone else said, then a bell rang. Willow turned around and pushed us under the table.
"It's those cops," she whispered. There was a loud thud, then the bell rang again.
"As soon as we can, we should get out of here and go… where does the map say we should go?" Dipper asked. I took it off my head and looked at it.
"It leads us to…"
GFF
"…The Gravity Falls Museum of History!" I said, giving Dipper the paper. He glared up at the building, acting 'manly'.
"You know what this means? We're gonna have to break in!" He said. Willow pushed him from behind.
"Or we could just walk in the front door," she said, walking up the steps. A woman stopped us when we went inside.
"Here are you free Pioneer Day passes, and your balloons; blue and pink," She said, giving us the papers and balloons. Dipper looked up and glared again, still trying to be 'manly.'
"We're in," He said. Willow pushed him again.
"Knock it off man," She said, walking around.
"So what are we gonna do next? Steal Thomas Jefferson's ribcage?" I asked. Even Willow looked at me like it was crazy.
"Eww, no. According to the map, the next clue should be… right here!" Willow said. We stopped in front of a triangular abstract painting.
"We gotta figure this out quick. I have a feeling those cops weren't in the library to check out books," Dipper said, looking at the painting.
"I don't think the one with the bell can read," I whispered. The three of us starting examining the painting. I got tired of standing so I sat on the bench, still looking at the painting.
"Hey, painting! Be less stupid!" I yelled at it, laying down. Laying down made it a bit clearer, so then I turned upside-down entirely, and that did the trick. "Guys, it worked!" I said, still upside-down. Dipper and Willow came over and turned upside-down.
"It's not abstract, it's just upside-down!" Dipper said excitedly. The painting was actually of a statue of a woman who was pointing at something.
"I've seen that statue at the cemetery. Let's go!" Willow said, the three of us standing up. Two seconds later, we were all grabbing our heads. Thankfully, we hadn't been upside-down that long, so it passed quickly.
"Okay, let's get outta here," Dipper said, all of us running towards the front door, Dipper in the lead. We were about to enter the main area when Dipper stopped suddenly, Willow and I crashing into him. I looked around the pillar and saw the cops talking to the woman at the entrance.
"What do we do?" I asked, pulling my head back.
"I'm pretty sure they're getting orders from someone to trail us. I'm not worried about Durland, but Blubs is the main problem. We wait for their boss to call, then we run pass them. When I say go, we run out the door like Grievers are on our tail. Split up if we have to. Meet up at the cemetery. Be ready," Willow said, watching the cops from behind the pillar. I got into a runner's crouch, ready to move instantly. A minute later, there was a crackling sound. "Wait for it… GO GO GO!" She whisper-shouted, the three of us taking off. They saw us, but we made it out the door no problem.
"Damn it! Get back here!" Blubs called after us. I turned around for a second and saw the two of them stuck in the doorway. I laughed a bit, then turned back around and caught up to Dipper and Willow. We ran all the way to the cemetery, not knowing how long we had. We slowed down once we actually got into the cemetery, not wanting to disrupt anyone. Willow took the lead, bringing us right in front of the statue.
"Nice job Willow. The statue must be pointing to the next clue," Dipper said, he and Willow looking in that direction. I got onto the podium the statue was on, then made it look like the woman was picking my nose.
"Gross, she's picking my nose!" I said. Willow face-palmed and Dipper starting rubbing the bridge of his nose. Suddenly, the statue's finger moved down a bit and there was a grinding noise from below me.
"Mabel, look!" Dipper said, pointing down. A trap door had opened up in the ground, a staircase leading under the graves.
"Who's silly now, Pacifica? Okay, ow ow ow. There we go," I said, getting my nose off the statue's finger. Willow went first with a flashlight (why she keeps one on her, I have no idea), then Dipper, then me. "Now we're getting into real conspiracy mode! I feel so serious," I said, putting another butterscotch in my mouth, throwing the wrapper on the stairs behind me. When we got off the steps, Dipper started walking beside Willow, looking at the journal. After a minute or two, he closed it and put it back in his vest.
"Nothing helpful in there. Just look out for booby traps," He said, slowing down a bit.
"Ha, booby traps," I whispered. The next step I took, the ground moved a bit and there was a clicking noise. We all stopped, but then Willow ducked and a dart flew pass her, landing in the wall behind me.
"Tranq darts! RUN!" She said, running down the path, Dipper and I following her, the three of us avoiding all of the darts. One or two nicked my clothes, but none hit me. Suddenly, we were all tumbling down a slope. We crashed through a tarp and landed in a pile.
"Girls, you good?" Dipper asked us. We nodded and stood up, looking around the room. It was full of old artifacts and tarps covering different things. There were files and boxes with CONFIDENTIAL or TOP SECRET stamped on most of them.
"It's a treasure trove of historic-y secret-y things," I said, all of us walking around the room. I picked up a file and opened it. The first picture was of President Lincoln with and without his hat on. Apparently, the hat was to cover an extra hand coming out of his head. The second page was a picture of Ben Franklin with a caption saying that he was a woman. "Guys, Ben Franklin secretly was a woman!" I yelled, putting the file back, looking around more.
"I am SO keeping this!" Willow called out, showing us a blueprint for an amped-up crossbow, then putting it in her camo jacket. We went back to searching for anything about the Northwest family.
"Guys, I found it!" Dipper called from the back of the room. Willow and I ran over to him, Willow grabbing some gold coins from a chest and stuffing them in her pockets. On a table in front of Dipper, there was a file with the words NORTHWEST COVER-UP on it.
"Awesome, now we can find out who the real town founder is," Willow said, the excited gleam back in her eyes, now whether that was from the Northwest's or her new treasures, I'm not sure. Dipper opened the file and started reading.
"'Let it be here recorded that Nathaniel Northwest, fabled founder of Gravity Falls, was, in fact, a fraud. As well as… a waste shoveling village idiot?' Oh man, bad news for Pacifica. Wait until the papers hear about this!" Dipper read, laughing at the part about a waste-shoveling idiot.
"Once people hear that I uncovered a historical conspiracy, they can never call me silly again!" I said excitedly. Willow looked at the document and started reading.
"'The true founder of Gravity Falls was Sir Lord Quentin Trembley III Esquire.'" She read, confusion clear in her face.
"Who's Quentin Trembley?" I asked, running through all the old names I knew to see if anything rang a bell. Something did.
"THAT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!" Someone said from behind us, light entering the room. We turned around and saw shadows. Whoever was holding the light moved it to the side allowing us to see that the cops had caught up to us. Blubs was holding the flashlight, Durland was ringing his bell.
"WE GOTCHA! Whoo! We…oookaaay," He stopped ringing the bell and fell face-first on the ground, tranq darts sticking out of his back.
"He got hit with quite a few of those darts," Blubs said, taking the darts out of Durland's back. He woke Durland up and helped him stand. "You good buddy?" He asked. Durland nodded, then his eyes went buggy.
"I think I might be colorblind now," He said, looking around. Blubs just nodded and turned to us.
"Quentin Trembley is a matter of national security," he said, turning the flashlight off.
"What do you mean 'national security?'" Dipper asked, closing the file and putting it in his vest.
"And who is Quentin Trembley anyway?" I asked, still not recognizing the name.
"See for yourself," Blubs said, taking his hat off. Underneath was a reel of old film. He put it in a projector (why that was down here, I don't know) and turned it on, black-and-white numbers counting down.
"Aww man, black and white?!" I said.
"Mabel, chill," Willow said, sitting on one of the tables that was down here. The film started and showed some government guy standing next to a table.
"If you're watching this, that means you are one of eight people in these United States with clearance to view this information. In fact, I myself will be shot as soon as the filming is complete," He said, looking off screen. "What, no? Okay, that's a relief! Of all of America's secrets, the most embarrassing was that of Quentin Trembley; The eighth-and-a-half president of the United States."
"President?" Dipper and Willow said, confused.
"Eighth and a half?" I added.
"After winning the 1837 election in a landslide (literally) Quentin Trembley quickly gained a reputation as America's silliest president. He waged war on pancakes, appointed six babies to the supreme court, and issued the de-pants-ipation proclamation. His state of the union speech was even worse. The only thing we have to fear… is gigantic, man-eating spiders! He was kicked out of office and escaped to an uncharted valley he named Gravity Falls, after plummeting into it at high speed. Trembley's shameful term was erased from history and officially replaced by William Henry Harrison as President and local nobody Nathaniel Northwest as founder of Gravity Falls. The whereabouts of president Trembley's body are unknown."
"Until now!" Blubs said, taking the tarp of what I thought was a large box. Instead, it was the body of Trembley surrounded by something that looked like honey.
"Whoa! Is that like amber or something?" Willow asked, looking at the block.
"The fool thought he could live forever by encasing himself in a block of solid peanut brittle. Smooth move Mr. President!" Blubs said, glaring at the body. "Finding Trembley's body was our special mission. And now, thanks to you kids, it's complete."
"Who knew all we had to do was follow a little girl's trail of candy wrappers?" Durland said, holding up the wrapper of one of my butterscotch candies.
"Ugh, silly!" I said, face-palming. I can't believe I did that! No wonder the cops were able to follow us all day!
"Now that you know the truth, well, we can't let you go around talkin' about it," Blubs said.
"Does that mean-?" Dipper said, going into protective brother mode and blocking me and Willow from the cops.
"Are you going to kill us?!" I asked, getting ready for a fight.
"What, no. Calm down kids. We're just gonna escort you and all this stuff back to D.C. You ain't comin' back by the way."
GFF
"ANYONE THERE? HELP US! LET US OUT!" We yelled, punching the box. Bulbs and Durland had put the three of us in a crate along with President Trembley's body. The crate, along with all the other stuff from the room was on a train going to DC. The three of us had been trying to break the crate open since the train took off, but nothing was working. I sat down next to Trembley, my head in my knees.
"I can't believe I left a trail of candy wrappers. I'm sorry guys, this is all my fault. Pacifica had me pegged all along. I'm just a silly failure like that embarrassing president what's-his-name," I said, depressed. I grabbed some of the peanut brittle from the block and put it in my mouth. Then there was a sound like cracking ice. I stood up and backed away, Dipper and Willow on either side of me. The peanut brittle was cracking apart. It exploded and all of us ducked our heads. When we looked up the peanut brittle was gone and Trembley was looking at us.
"It is I, Quentin Trembley!" He said, ripping his pants off.
"You're alive! But how?" Dipper asked, staring.
"Peanut brittle really DOES have life sustaining properties!" Willow said, looking at a chunk that had landed at her feet.
"You're not silly, you're brilliant!" I exclaimed, thinking that this is one of the more 'normal' things we've seen since coming to town.
"And so are you, dear girl," He said, putting his hand on my shoulder. "You figured out my clues and saved me from my delicious tomb!"
"He's right. Turning maps into hats, hanging upside-down; your silliness solved the code that serious cops couldn't crack in 100 years!" Dipper said, complementing me. I smiled, not worried about Pacifica anymore. Now the only thing I was worried about was getting out of the crate. Apparently, so was Trembley.
"By Jefferson! We seem to but trapped in some sort of crate-shaped box," he said, looking around.
"It's a crate Mr. President," I told him. He reached into his jacket pocket and took out a key.
"Good thing I still have the president's key, which can open any lock in America!" He said, slamming the key into the wall a few times.
"Uh, sir… I don't think that's going to work," Willow said, staring at him.
"Wood! My age old enemy," He said, putting the key back in his jacket. "In order to get out of here, this is going to take the silliest plan ever conceived."
"I think I know someone who can help you," Willow said, smiling at me. I started looking around and noticed a small hole in the wood.
"How about that hole?" I asked, pointing at it.
"We will leap through it!" Trembley said, diving at the hole, me doing the same. I put my finger through the hole and started wiggling it around.
"Guys, I'm not sure this is working," Dipper said, sounding skeptical.
"Trust the silliness!" I growled, still wiggling my finger. I felt something land beside me, a pecking sound coming from outside.
"Is that my third wife? Sandy?" Trembley said, listening to the pecking. I pulled my finger back in, the pecking still going on. A few seconds later, the entire crate broke open.
"Well, we didn't fit through the hole. Let's rebuild the box and try again!" Trembley said, reaching for some of the wood.
"Yeah, how about we do that later? We gotta get outta here!" Dipper said, running to the door, Willow following him.
"Also good!" Trembley and I started following them. The first two cars were other storage cars. The third one was the sleeping units. Standing in front of the ice machine was Durland. When he saw us, he dropped his ice bucket.
"Blubs!" He called, reaching for his Taser. The four of us ran back the way we had come, ending up back in the original car, which turned out to be the last one.
"Up there!" Willow said, pointing to the emergency exit in the ceiling. Trembley went up first, trying to open the hatch with his key. Dipper climbed the ladder and took the key, then opened the hatch and got out of the train. We ran as far as we could, but a gap in the cars stopped us. We turned around and saw Blubs and Durland standing a few feet behind us.
"Sheriff Blubs, do you really want to lock us all up in a government facility somewhere?" Willow yelled.
"I've got no choice! Our orders come from the very top!" Blubs said, pointing in the direction the train was going.
"Wait a minute! Quentin, did you ever sign an OFFICIAL resignation?" Dipper asked.
"No sir. I ate a salamander and jumped out the window," Trembley said.
"Then, technically you're still legally the President of the United States! You've gotta answer to this guy now!" Dipper said, pointing at Trembley, a cocky smirk on his face.
"As president of these several United States, I hereby order you to pretend this never happened! And- and go on a delightful vacation!" He said, a sign hitting the back of his head.
"Vacation?" Blubs asked, then turned to Durland excitedly. "What place have you always wanted to visit?"
"Silly Water Fun Slides in Grand Lakes, Michigan!" They both said, the train slowing down. When it stopped, Trembley, Dipper, Willow and I got off the train. Blubs and Durland were still on, now wearing Hawaiian shirts. We waved at each other as the train started moving again. Once it was out of sight, Trembley turned to me.
"You've done a great service to your country Mabel. As thanks, I'd like to make you an official US congresswoman," He said, putting a top hat on my head.
"I'm legalizing everything!" I replied, throwing my arms up. Trembley nodded and turned to Willow and Dipper.
"Roderick and Marissa… You kids are on your way to unlocking the mysteries of this great land. So I'd like you have my President's Key!" He said, giving the key to Dipper.
"Thank you. Let's get outta here before someone realizes anything happened," Dipper said, putting the key in his vest. We started walking back home, me not worried about Pacifica anymore.
GFF
"… And then he chased me around and spanked me with a paddle for like three hours! Bottom line, George Washington was a jerk," Trembley said, us walking into the center of town.
"A-greed!" I said, walking over to where Pacifica was watching some kids running around a maypole. "Hey Pacifica! I uncovered a government conspiracy about the eighth-and-a-half President of the United States! Who's silly now?" I asked. Pacifica looked over my shoulder, then her eyes bugged out.
"What the… Who is that idiot?" She said. I turned around and saw Trembley chasing a bald eagle, his fists up.
"The eighth-and-a-half President of America! How is he still alive? Turns out you can hibernate in peanut brittle and it-" Pacifica started laughing and cut me off.
"Wow! You really are a sad, dumb little girl. Nice top hat by the way," She said, walking over to her parents, who were standing in front of a limo. "Oh yeah, your guys' car is stuck in the mud. Enjoy walking home!" She yelled, getting in the car.
"Aren't you going to tell her about her ate-gray ampa-gray?" Dipper asked, holding up the file. I shook my head and put my sweater back on.
"I've got nothing to prove. I've learned that being silly is awesome!" I said proudly. Willow took the file from Dipper and whistled.
"I haven't learned anything!" She said, running up to the limo. "Hey Pacifica! Nathaniel Northwest didn't found Gravity Falls and your whole family is a sham. Deal with it!" She said, giving Pacifica the file and running back to us. "Man, revenge is underrated. That felt awesome!" Willow said excitedly.
"Children," Trembley said from behind us. "I am needed elsewhere. Just know that I'll always be right here… on the negative twelve-dollar bill," He said, giving it to Dipper.
"Whoa! This is worthless!" Dipper said, pocketing the money.
"It's less than worthless. Trembley, away!" Trembley said, jumping backwards and landing on a horse. The horse took off and ran out of sight, Trembley waving goodbye to us.
"Where do you think he's going?" I asked.
"I'm gonna say… off a cliff." Dipper said, smiling tiredly.
GFF
"And then Soos came by and talked to me for like an hour!" Stan said. We had found him locked in the stocks and smelling like tomatoes.
"You've been through so much," I said, Dipper taking the President's Key out of his vest and putting it in the lock.
"Sweet, it works!" Dipper said, putting the key back in his vest.
"So what's with the top hat?" Stan asked me, rubbing his wrists and neck.
"I am a congresswoman!" I replied.
"Pardon me?"
"You are officially pardoned!" I said, Dipper, Willow and I laughing. Stan just rubbed the bridge of his nose again.
"You are never gonna make sense, are you kid?" He asked.
"No I'm not, Grunkle Stan. No I'm not. Mabel, away!" I yelled, jumping backwards. I crashed into some barrels and trash cans. "I'M OKAY!"
I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. It was such a stupidly funny episode that it was a piece of cake to write. And check out the updated story picture! Sorry it looks weird; I STINK at drawing. And I want your help with something. Since Alex is in the next episode (Time Travelers Pig), I'm having a hard time making sure the episode still works with him and Willow in it. If you have any ideas, please tell me. It will help me out A LOT! Anyway, please review, give me your ideas, and I'll see you in two weeks!