CHAPTER 13

Bella stood in the doorway watching Edward's car getting smaller and smaller, until finally he turned a corner and disappeared from sight. When she stepped back inside the house everything was suddenly too quiet and she felt so restless that she wandered aimlessly from room to room, like a security guard checking for non-existent intruders.

After she'd done an almost complete tour of the house and found nothing to distract herself, she looked in on Carlisle who was quietly sleeping, then phoned Mrs Cope. She had wanted an excuse to talk about Edward, but in the end her happiness felt too new to share just yet, so after commiserating with Mrs Cope about her cold and wishing her a speedy recovery, she rang off.

As she passed the open door of the drawing room for the second time, the Christmas tree in the corner caught her attention and reminded her that she still hadn't properly looked at the jewellery Carlisle had given her. Feeling excited all over again, she ran up the stairs and into her bedroom and after grabbing the box from its new home on her bedside table, she sat on the bed and carefully laid everything out in front of her.

There was even more items than she'd thought; a whole collection of necklaces, bracelets and rings was glittering and shining up at her and Bella could hardly believe they were really hers. They were all exquisitely made and some appeared to be quite old, it seemed incredible that they had so little value, they looked as if they should be worth a fortune.

After examining them all closely, she tried each one on in front of the mirror then put everything on at once, until she was laden in finery. Impressed with the effect, she took a photo and sent it to Edward. Her cheeks burned when she opened his response – he wanted her to wear them naked and he looked forward to removing them one by one. She hadn't expected him to be so direct and she squirmed at the pictures her imagination promptly came up with.

As promised, Edward rang her when he broke his journey at Bristol and when he finally got home they ended up talking on the phone for over an hour. But London was a distant world away and although the days that followed were filled with calls, texts and messages from him, Bella wanted Edward here, now, and the waiting became more and more difficult and frustrating.

Mrs Cope's cold had turned into a bad cough and she'd decided to stay with her sister for another few days rather than risk passing anything on to Carlisle, so Bella was left with only Melanie and Carlisle for company, until Emmett and Rosalie came back from holiday on the day before New Year's Eve.

They both came rushing over almost as soon as they arrived home, anxious to reassure themselves that Carlisle was out of danger. But while Rosalie was occupied with giving Carlisle a thorough check-over, Emmett managed to get in some sly digs about Edward which made Bella blush bright red, and knowing the gossip must already be all round the village, Bella decided she'd better own up to Mrs Cope the next time they spoke on the phone.

Mrs Cope laughed when Bella hesitantly admitted she was seeing Edward, 'That's old news, deary, and we all knew it was coming sooner or later. It's just a wonder you both took so long about it. When is it that Master Edward's thinking of moving down now?'

'His boss has been really good about everything, thank goodness. Edward handed in his notice on Monday and they're letting him go at the end of the month. So that just fits in nicely with the sale of the London flat – if it doesn't all fall through again. He's hoping contracts will be exchanged any day now.'

'Master Edward will be so relieved to finally be done with winding up his father's estate. That Irina caused him so much trouble on top of everything else and it's dragged on for far too long…Oh, that reminds me, when did you say James was coming back?'

Failing to see the connection, but used to Mrs Cope's meandering train of thought, Bella couldn't hide her exasperation. This whole lack of communication was getting ridiculous now and she was beginning to worry that James wouldn't come back at all. She really didn't want to break up with him by phone or text, but at the moment it didn't look as if she'd even have that option.

'I haven't heard a word from James since Christmas Eve. He said he was going to some sort of family get together in the mountains, but apparently phone reception's really bad out there.'

'Goodness child, surely there must be a working phone somewhere. When was he supposed to be back?'

'Well I know he was definitely planning to see in the New Year in Italy, then travel back to the UK around the middle of next week if he could manage it.'

As usual Mrs Cope seemed to know much more than Bella did, 'That would be in time for his meeting with the planning department then.'

'Oh, is Aro still insisting on major alterations to Mike's restaurant? I thought the sale was taking a long time to go through.'

'I've heard he wants to nearly double the size of the seating area and the kitchens.' Mrs Cope snorted in derision, 'Fat chance of that in a conservation area.'

'Oh dear, James is going to have his work cut out then.'

'Perhaps…But anyway the reason I was ringing was to let you know I've asked Melanie to stay overnight tonight, so you can have some time off and see in the New Year properly. You've had a lot to deal with recently and a youngster like you should be out enjoying yourself a bit, not cooped up in a gloomy old house with a lot of old people the whole time.'

'Oh, I wasn't expecting…'

'Go on with you. There's always a party at the Sailor's Rest on New Year's Eve. I don't want to hear you've spent the evening moping around the house missing Master Edward. You make sure you have a bit of fun for a change.'

-ooo-

When Bella arrived at the pub, it was already packed with New Year revellers, most of whom were well on their way to becoming cheerfully and noisily drunk. As usual the whole place was lit up like a beacon, and music and the sound of people enjoying themselves was pouring out into the frosty night air.

After their last meeting on the night of James's dinner party, Jessica greeted Bella like an old friend and refused to take any money for her drink. She was too busy serving customers to say much more than hello, but later on she came and found Bella to ask how Carlisle was getting on and to Bella's surprise her concern seemed to be completely genuine and the more they chatted, the more Bella realised that underneath her off-putting exterior Jessica was really quite sweet.

Emmett was busy making the most of the opportunity to earn some extra cash from his taxi round and Bella missed his company. But she knew plenty of other people by now and after a few drinks she began to relax and even found herself joining in with an impromptu singsong, ending with a rousing rendition of Trelawney's Army, which brought a sentimental tear to several eyes and set the glasses rattling on their shelf above the bar.

Rosalie turned up just after eleven and squeezed herself in next to Bella, to a chorus of good natured abuse all around the table. She looked thoughtful and Bella wasn't surprised when she followed her out to the loo half an hour later, so they could talk without having to shout above the noise.

Bella knew what was coming. Things had been really awkward between them from the minute Emmett had mentioned Edward yesterday and she was expecting to hear a long list of reasons why Edward was wrong for her. But in fact Rosalie surprised her.

'Bella, I know you must blame me for the whole Lauren and Edward thing and I really don't want us to fall out over all of this. So I've decided I'm going to make an effort to get along better with Edward in future, if I can. Just don't keep pushing him in my face to start with ok? And I'll try and get used to the idea.'

'That's fine if you can manage it, Rosalie. But I don't understand what he's done to make you dislike him so much. Emmett's got no problem with Edward, so why have you tried so hard to put me off him?'

'Well, apart from being a complete manwhore…'

Bella raised her eyebrows and Rosalie re-thought what she'd just said.

'Well, maybe that reputation at school was a little bit unjustified. It was more a case of everyone flinging themselves at him - although he did get through quite a few girlfriends you know.'

Rosalie looked at Bella challengingly and Bella decided to just let that one go, because Rosalie obviously had more to say.

'But it wasn't really that so much as just seeming not to care about anyone or anything, especially what trouble he got Emmett and Alice into.'

'What do you mean?'

'The scrapes he got Emmett into for a start. We try not to even mention Edward's name any more, otherwise we'd probably be divorced by now because of all the arguments. Edward nearly got Em expelled halfway through their 'A' levels and that bloody motorbike they went around on was all Edward's fucking idea. Except it was Emmett that ended up in hospital for months. His left leg was so badly smashed up that he nearly lost it.'

Bella was shocked, 'Christ I didn't know anything about that. What happened?'

'They both came off the bike on the cliff road, but no one knows exactly what happened, because neither of them could remember. Edward was driving and he was concussed as well, but he got off much more lightly than Em. The only good thing was that the bloody bike went over the cliff.'

'So what about Alice?'

'Oh, I don't know. It's difficult to explain. She started to do all these really weird and dangerous things and Edward always seemed to be there as well, like it was all his idea, although she denied it was anything to do with him. She just laughed when I tried to get her to stop and said I was a lightweight and boring and she didn't know why she'd ever been friends with me. Afterwards I really wished I'd tried harder, before it was too late. But I felt pushed aside, you know?'

Rosalie's voice trailed off sadly and Bella decided to speak up.

'When you first told me about how Alice drowned, you said that Edward insisted he was only trying to look out for her. I can imagine Edward and Emmett getting up to some crazy stunts and Emmett's more than able to look after himself, but I'm sure Edward would never have put Alice in danger. I know you must have needed someone to blame at the time, but considering they both denied it, wouldn't it make much more sense if Edward was only trying to look after her, because he cared about Alice just as much as you did?'

Rosalie looked mulishly unconvinced and Bella knew it was no use trying to change her mind. And despite all the stories she'd heard from Mrs Cope and Edward about how close Alice and Edward had been, she felt a tiny bit of doubt herself. She remembered Rosalie saying Edward had admitted panicking and pushing Alice away from him when she was drowning. She hadn't known Edward then, perhaps he really had been so immature and lost that he'd dragged Alice into danger with him, not caring about his safety or hers.

But no, what was she thinking? That definitely wasn't the Edward she knew. Raising hell with Emmett was one thing, but recklessly putting someone he loved in danger was a different matter. She remembered the expression on his face when he looked at Carlisle and she knew without a doubt that it was completely outside his nature. In fact if anything he veered towards being too autocratic and overprotective if no one teased him out of it. Her thoughts immediately jumped to something quite different and aware that Rosalie was still standing there, she had to stifle a smile.

For the moment then, they'd have to agree to disagree and knowing how hard it was for Rosalie to back down over Edward for her sake, in the spirit of the new year and of new beginnings all round, Bella hugged her friend and did her best to forget all the unnecessary heartache she'd been put through, although it would be a long time before she completely trusted Rosalie's judgement again.

But when Bella went back to her seat in the bar, the only person she really wanted by her side was Edward and although they video chatted to wish each other a happy New Year and to share their festive surroundings as the clock struck twelve – Edward was at some posh do where everyone was in black tie and the guests were toasting each other in champagne – it really only made her miss him more.

-ooo-

Bella still hadn't heard a word from James and despite leaving him a message to wish him a happy New Year, it wasn't until the following day, when she was just sitting down to lunch which she'd tried to make a bit of a celebration for Carlisle by inviting Emmett, Rosalie and Melanie, that her phone finally rang.

Excusing herself from the table and handing the bowl of potatoes she was holding to Rosalie, Bella slipped out of the dining room into the small sitting room next door.

James sounded very faint and far away and she had to ask him to speak up.

'James, I'm sorry, I can still barely hear you. Where are you?'

'I'm at the airport on my way back to England.'

Bella could imagine the way his eyes would be shining with amusement at the unexpected surprise. His voice purred in her ear, seductive and promising no end of delights. She tried to hang on to her annoyance with him, but as always it was difficult; he was just too good at coaxing her into a conspiratorial smile.

She sighed, 'When will you be here?'

'On Monday. I am already so excited to see you my darling, but Aro has instructed me to meet with Alec and Demetri in London, which is why I shall be delayed by one day.'

'Are you bringing them here again? You know Carlisle's still recovering from some very serious additional health problems?' Bella shook her head in disbelief at James's apparent lack of concern for his stepfather's wellbeing yet again.

In response James sounded theatrically shocked, 'How could I not be mindful of Carlisle's condition, Bella? He is always in my thoughts and I am sad that you should even for a moment think such a thing. In fact I am about to telephone Mike to reserve rooms at his delightful inn for my friends.'

The line was all echo and hiss and James sounded as if he was speaking to her in an electrical rainstorm at the bottom of a tunnel. She couldn't catch what he was saying and his voice faded away again.

She shouted into her phone, 'James, I'm sorry, I can't hear you. I'll see you on Monday. Have a good trip and let me know when you'll be arriving nearer the time.'

She paused and listened again, but there was only a strange splashy hiss, like cars speeding through puddles, in her ear. She'd wanted to warn James that she had bad news for him, because it seemed cruel not to, especially as he'd given her the impression that he was hurrying back because he was looking forward to seeing her so much.

She was sorry for having to hurt him by telling him she only wanted to be friends, but it wasn't as if she'd led James on, or made any promises. It had been all his idea to take things further and she could see now how much pressure he'd put on her to agree.

She wondered if she'd get an opportunity to speak to him again before he arrived. Probably not if the last week and a half was anything to go by. His blasé attitude towards keeping in touch was tiresome and she really couldn't be bothered to worry about it any more. He'd just better turn up on Monday, or she'd be unbelievably annoyed with him.

-ooo-

The rest of the day dragged and Bella still had Sunday to get through before James arrived. Grudgingly she realised she'd have to start studying again soon. Her final term was beginning in a week and she couldn't delay her project about Lady Mary any longer.

All through the last few horrible months she'd managed to keep up with her other coursework, but underneath the mad whirl of gaiety James had pulled her into, everything had felt so overwhelmingly sad and hopeless in her own life, that thinking about what had happened to Lady Mary had only made things worse and she'd done her best to forget about the whole thing.

But realising she would run out of time if she wasn't careful, she decided to at least look for the folder of evidence she'd abandoned on the day she'd found the bill from the madhouse and Rosalie had dropped her bombshell about Edward and Lauren. And after searching in all the more likely places, she eventually found it shoved into one of the filing cabinets in the attic.

Once she'd retrieved everything, she opened a new Word document on her laptop, typed in her name and student ID number, then stared at the essay title she'd chosen 'Myth and Reality or Truth and Fiction.'

The pairs of opposites felt a lot less like opposites now and much more of a blur. Since she'd arrived at the Lantern House she'd begun to understand that 'truth', 'reality', 'fiction' and 'myth' were much trickier concepts than she'd previously imagined and it occurred to her that if she hadn't even been able to make sense of what was going on in her own life half the time, what chance did she have of unravelling the truth about something which had happened so long ago?

She also remembered the lecturer in a previous year warning that the truth could be surprisingly subjective and history, even accepted, watertight, no questions asked history, was always open to interpretation and just as susceptible as fiction to the whims of fashion, politics, cultural climate and the writer's own prejudices and agenda. Even what looked like undeniable facts didn't always stand up to close inspection and Bella was beginning to see what he'd meant.

In fact she'd been hopeless at finding out the truth about anything so far. It was ridiculous how wrong she'd been about Edward for instance and how easily she'd jumped to conclusions - she already suspected that almost everything she thought she'd known about him had been mistaken.

As far as her essay about Lady Mary was concerned, Bella also remembered how worried she'd been that she hadn't found enough information, so she emailed her tutor for advice, hoping for a response within a day or two. Meanwhile she looked through what she'd got:

A newspaper article about Carlisle's great grandmother's party which included the story about the ghost, the newspaper report of Lady Mary's death and the death record she'd also found online, a copy of the local parish register entries of births, marriages and deaths and a photo of the crypt, a copy of the page in the family bible, a few brief mentions of Lady Mary, Perceval and The Grey Lady that Carlisle had found in various books in his library and finally the marriage contract, the deeds to the village and the bill from the madhouse she'd found in the family archives.

There was also Lady Mary's portrait of course, which had started her off on the whole thing, and the damaged portrait of Percy in the attic. But it was precious little to base a whole dissertation on and she was really worried about failing her degree because of it. The marks would make up quite a large percentage of the grade for the whole year and she couldn't afford to throw them away.

It was even worse when she tried jotting something down on paper. To meet the myth/reality, truth/fiction criteria, she was supposed to be comparing the story with the facts, so she wrote down a list of what she'd been told about the ghost (by Emmett, Mrs Cope and Edward) and another list of what she'd been able to find out about Lady Mary's real life.

The Myth

Lady Mary's husband Perceval had locked her up (possibly in the cellar of The Lantern House)

To drive her mad

& to get his hands on her money

Otherwise known as The Grey Lady, Lady Mary haunted (the house?) & grounds

& was supposed to herald a death in the Cullen family

(possibly a rumour invented by smugglers)

The Reality

Records of births, marriage and deaths, so she was definitely a real person with a real family

She married Perceval Cullen

She left a much grander house to come to The Lantern House

She had 3 children who died in infancy

Money did not seem to be an issue in the marriage

She went mad

She drowned while under the care of a madhouse in Chelsea London (possibly suicide?)

She was buried at All Saints Church (aka Chelsea Old Church)

A beautiful memorial was commissioned for her in the village church, with an inscription from the Song of Solomon.

Bella looked at the list again and changed 'she went mad' under Reality to 'probably went mad'. She knew enough about the background to gothic novels when they started to appear in the late eighteenth century, to know that private madhouses were scandalously prone to accepting patients with no questions asked, as long as the bills were paid.

The lack of proper information was worse than she'd thought. She hadn't been able to find out anything at all about Mary and Percy's real relationship and at this rate she was going to fail her course. What on earth was she going to do?

She heard a ping as an email came in and to her surprise she saw it was a reply from her tutor already - she must be just as bored today as Bella was. Without much hope of a solution, Bella started to read…

Hi Bella

I see you're worrying too much as usual!

My advice would be either to make things more personal to you and/or widen things out to include more of the background.

Perhaps you could explain more about the reasons for the original story. The smugglers? The ghost? Why would the story have taken the shape it did & why is it still being told 250 years later? Is any of Lady Mary's story still relevant today?

Or you could write about what you expected to find & what you've found out about life at the time and the wider social issues – what Lady Mary's daily life would have been like, the place of women in society & in her class, what she would have expected of her marriage, why her children died, what medical treatment was available at the time, how mental health was regarded and treated, suicides – the list goes on!

Apologies for pointing out the obvious, but remember that the most important part of a story isn't just where you end up, but how and why you got there and what happened along the way.

So enjoy the rest of your journey and wherever it takes you to and I look forward to reading the finished result.

Good luck!

Siobhan

Bella grinned, thank goodness for Siobhan. Now she had some direction she was suddenly filled with enthusiasm. She had so many ideas and there was so much she wanted to write about that she started on a plan straight away.

-ooo-

True to form, as Bella cleared the remains of Carlisle's lunch away on Monday, James still hadn't rung or answered the text she'd sent him, and trying to contact him again when his phone appeared to be permanently switched off, felt like a complete waste of time. He probably wouldn't have started out from London too early though, so Bella assumed he'd arrive in the late afternoon or mid-way through the evening, depending on how many times he stopped on the way and where he intended to eat supper.

Bella had had one false alarm when Carlisle's solicitor unexpectedly turned up to see him, which wasn't unusual because they were old friends, but Emmett seemed to have spent half the day loitering around the house and it was making her nervous. So the next time she saw him she grabbed him and asked what he was doing.

Emmett looked at Bella rather sheepishly, he knew there was no point in lying because she would catch him out straight away, 'Umm, Edward asked me to keep an eye on the situation when James arrived.'

Bella couldn't believe what she was hearing, 'What? He told you to spy on me to make sure I broke up with James?'

'No, no, nothing like that! He was just a bit worried about James's reaction and wanted me to be on hand in case I was needed.'

'Oh for goodness sake! What's wrong with the pair of you? I'm perfectly capable of dealing with James, I'm not a baby!'

Bella felt exasperated with both of them and refused to listen when Emmett tried to argue.

'Just go away Emmett. I'll be fine I promise. And if you're worried about Edward, I'll ring him when he gets home from work and tell him off for being so ridiculously overprotective as well.'

Five minutes after she'd shooed Emmett out of the back door, the doorbell rang and this time it was James. Bella had intended to usher him straight into the sitting room so that they could have some privacy, but almost as soon as she opened the door James guessed something was wrong and they ended up having an awkward conversation standing in the hall.

He leant in to kiss her on both cheeks as usual, but she backed away before he could touch her and when she looked at him, his bright blue eyes were suddenly steely and his mouth had tightened into a thin line. She'd never seen him look so angry before and she felt a tiny pinprick of alarm.

But she'd barely registered the thought before his expression changed so completely that she almost believed she'd been mistaken. James was smiling at her now as if he hadn't a care in the world.

'How are you my darling? You appear very solemn today, is there something which is bothering you?'

'Yes there is actually and I'm sorry for springing it on you like this, but I wanted to make things clear straight away…You know before you left, I said I hadn't quite made up my mind about us?'

'Oh I see. Do not distress yourself, this is not unexpected. The age difference alone… it was idiotic of me to have entertained the idea for one second. The fault is all mine, I had already thought better of it and was waiting to discuss this with you.'

Bella was completely taken aback. She stared at James in disbelief, this wasn't what she'd expected at all. She scrutinised his expression wondering whether to believe him. Perhaps this was why he'd avoided talking to her over Christmas. Maybe he'd thought she was the one who'd be upset? It really wasn't like James to have been so neglectful and she wanted a reason to forgive him. But was he really telling the truth?

His eyelids descended slowly and completely as he blinked and looked away towards the stairs, then met her eyes again and smiled. There was something oddly reptilian about the movement and Bella remembered that Jessica had called him a snake when she was drunk. She smiled at the thought, no one who really knew James could possibly think that.

Nothing in his demeanour suggested that he was lying, or that he was either angry or upset. As always he seemed totally relaxed and at ease and his eyes were alive with their usual fun and good humour. Bella felt so relieved. She'd already forgotten her earlier moment of alarm and she couldn't believe she'd been let off so lightly. She didn't want to lose James's friendship completely and if he was fine with returning to how things had been at the beginning that was great.

'Now come, Bella,' James held out his hand in invitation, 'we must see how poor Carlisle is doing. I am most anxious to satisfy myself that he is fully recovered. How difficult it has been to be so far away from you both at this worrying time.'

-ooo-

Bella observed James closely the whole time he was with Carlisle and was unable to detect anything unusual in his manner. He was as sunny, entertaining and good humoured as ever and she had no reason at all to doubt him.

But after half an hour spent relating some of the hilarious incidents which had happened over Christmas, cut off in the mountains, in a snowstorm, with his very eccentric relatives, James decided that after all he wouldn't stay and he was sure he would be just as comfortable with Alec and Demetri at the pub. Carlisle needed his rest and taking into account their small contretemps – his eyes slid sideways and rested on Bella's face for a moment – he didn't want his presence to be the cause of any unnecessary awkwardness.

Bella tried to insist that wouldn't be the case, but James had made up his mind and a few minutes later she found herself accompanying him to the door. This time when James kissed her on both cheeks she didn't pull away and she promised to come and visit him at the Sailor's Rest in a day or two.

She would have lingered on the doorstep to wave him goodbye, but a sudden draught swept through the hall as soon as James stepped over the threshold, wresting the heavy door out of Bella's hand and loudly slamming it behind him. She rolled her eyes - Emmett must have left the back door open again.

She texted Edward immediately to let him know the dreadful deed was done, but once James was gone she felt more upset than she'd expected. She was glad that Edward was in a meeting and couldn't phone her back straight away, because she didn't want him to think she regretted choosing him over James in any way, but she needed a bit of time to get over it.

A chat on the phone with Mrs Cope over a cup of tea and a slice of saffron cake did the trick, especially when Mrs Cope told her she was finally coming back the next day. But when Edward rang later he had bad news. There'd been another hiccup in the sale of his flat which had already been dragging on for months and now the buyer was insisting on exchanging contracts on Saturday morning, which meant he couldn't come down to Cornwall on Friday as he'd planned and they'd only have Saturday night and half of Sunday together.

Bella assured him she didn't mind how short the time was, as long as she saw him, but when Edward phoned her again later, still apologising for how little time they'd have together, she suddenly realised there was no real reason why she couldn't go up to London instead. Carlisle was stable and Mrs Cope would be back at any moment itching to look after him and if the worst happened and Carlisle had another relapse while she was away, Edward would be able to drive her straight back.

She'd also reached a point in her research where, although she'd accepted there was probably no new information to find, she really wanted to see for herself where Lady Mary had spent her last few weeks and where she was buried. She definitely didn't want to risk being away from Carlisle for too long. But if she caught a train on Thursday and returned on Monday, she'd be able to spend all day on Friday wandering around Chelsea while Edward was at work, then they'd still have the whole weekend together.

Carlisle and Mrs Cope were really encouraging when she mentioned the idea and Edward was extremely enthusiastic. So already feeling so excited that she could hardly wait, Bella went ahead and booked herself a train ticket to London and started counting off the days.

Thanks for reading. Have a very merry Christmas and a happy new year, or happy holidays anyway.

Bella will be going to London to see Edward in the next chapter, so she'll be very happy, yay!

See you in 2017 xxx Sue