When he gets home, he gets a beer out of the fridge and sits down. He removes his hat and runs a hand through his hair. He guzzles down the beer quickly then stares at his hat in his hands. It's the one she gave him, almost six years ago. It was a Christmas present, a thank you for driving her to the hospital when her father was sick. He remembers that night like it was yesterday. He's never really been big on hospitals, it all started when he saw his mother in the hospital when he was a kid. He also hates needles, wounds and IV's. He had to deal with his uneasiness of hospitals when his dad got sick and eventually died. He wanted to do the same with Lorelai, be there for her while she worried about her dad. When he told her that he wasn't big on hospitals, she told him he could leave, telling him that he didn't look so good. That led to her saying that he always looks good. He was pleased and surprised that she thought this. At that point in their relationship, he knew that he was attracted to her… he just didn't know he was in love and even though they occasionally flirted, he was afraid to ask her out. Later that night, Lorelai started crying and she let her head fall on his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around her rubbed her back. It felt pleasant, having her that close to him, they had hugged each other before then, but this was different. He was happy to be a shoulder to cry on for her.
Then a couple days later, she gave him the hat. He wore the hat every day from that day on. He guessed it was kind of a way to show his feelings for her, but he didn't tell her how he felt for another three years after that. Memories of their relationship rush through him suddenly. Their first kiss, her lips were so soft… and their second kiss when she had repeated his question to her, "Will you just stand still?"
Their first date, when he had told her: "I'm in. I am all in." All the times they kissed goodbye when she left the diner. The night they got back together, kissing her while Judy Garland sang loudly on the T.V. Getting engaged, "Kids would be good." she had told him and he was so happy. Seeing her look so beautiful in the wedding dress that she had bought, which she had had some doubts on, but he quickly got rid of them telling her: "It's perfect." And finally the memory of the last time he really saw her happy, when she told him that she had planned their wedding for June 3rd.
He remembers trying to tell her about April the night she showed him the wedding dress, but after seeing her so happy, once again he couldn't find a way to tell her that he had a twelve year old daughter that he never knew about. Then she found out in one the worst possible ways, she saw April in the diner and April had told her that she was the owner's daughter. He told Lorelai that he was stupid for not telling her and that was true. But, she forgave him for keeping that secret even though he was being a hypocrite after telling her "No more secrets." She was the one who suggested postponing the wedding so that he could spend some time getting to know April. He thought she was okay with the fact that he had wanted to get to know his daughter alone. He thought she was okay with postponing the wedding, but when they went on that trip to Martha's Vineyard, she had told him that she was holding out hope that things would settle down with him in time for a June 3rd wedding. He felt guilty that she felt that way, so he reassured her that he loved her and that the wedding was going to happen, he even told them that they could elope.
But things just got worse after that, he left her for ten days when he went on a school trip with April. When he returned, he decided he wanted to throw April a birthday party in the diner. It turned out to be a bust, so he had to call Lorelai to come help him out. That night, he realized how stupid he was in thinking that April would like Lorelai better than him. He didn't realize that all Lorelai wanted was to help him… and it was stupid of him to keep them apart. He was so thankful that Lorelai helped him with the party. On the other hand, Anna was furious that Lorelai was left alone with April and her friends. And he listened to Anna's complaints; he told Lorelai that Anna was mad. He listened to Anna because he was afraid that she would take April away from him if he didn't do what she wanted. So, instead of letting his fiancée get to know her future stepdaughter, he took the easy way out and decided to respect Anna's wishes.
Then, instead of things calming down like he wanted them to, they got even worse. Apparently, Lorelai went to see Anna, and she said that Anna said everything with April would be fine once they were married. This made him angry, he didn't want her help with Anna, he could handle it… he didn't need Lorelai to stick up for him. He didn't want Anna to be even angrier than she already was. But Lorelai wouldn't listen, telling him that she's been not saying anything or having an opinion for months. Could she really have been upset for months without him noticing? Was all of this his fault? Maybe it was. He should have seen that she was actually upset even though she told him that she was okay with postponing the wedding. No. Forget it, he doesn't need her. He doesn't need a woman who won't tell him how she's feeling. He's done reminiscing and wishing things could have gone differently.
Luke gets up to get another beer. On the way to the fridge, he throws the blue hat in the bottom of the closet. He's done wearing it, it was only a symbol of his love for her and he doesn't want to be reminded of how much he loved her. Even though it hurts, he wants to forget that he ever met Lorelai Gilmore, forget that she was only woman he ever truly loved.
A week later, when the diner reopens, Rory comes in and she notices his new hat almost right away. He doesn't tell her why he has a new hat, but she doesn't ask either. He doesn't ask her how Lorelai is either; he just gives Rory her coffee and muffin and she leaves without mentioning Lorelai. Lorelai doesn't come into the diner at all, but he tells himself that he doesn't care.