Yellow Ribbons

I remember I was called upon when she gave birth, little more than a girl myself, of only fourteen years; holding her hand while she cursed and struggled and sweated on the bed. The midwives calling encouragement and Rowena's tears leaking down her face. Then after what felt like a lifetime, though probably to Rowena eternity, Helena was born. Small and red and wailing, Rowena looked positively repulsed; but after we had washed her and the wet nurse had fed her, while the midwives cleared the bed sheets and brought Rowena a tea, Helena was a rather pretty baby. Although her face was still pink, she was healthy and strong with dark blue eyes and small, sweet nose, little brown curls already on her head. I had been given her and gently bounced her up and down in my arms, placing my finger into her palm and smiling when her hand clasp into a little fist. I brought her over to Rowena.

"Isn't she lovely, Rowena?"
Rowena nodded, but she looked strangely dazed and when I handed her the baby Rowena made no attempt to cuddle her close or look into the little face. I gave Rowena a nudge.
"Yes. Lovely." she said, as though quoting a passage from a book.
"What will you call her?" I asked, Rowena shrugged.
"It doesn't matter too much, it's a girl." she said.

I had thought better of arguing with Rowena so soon after birthing, I had dismissed her statement as a result of the long, tiring labour. So I gave her a kiss on her forehead and made my way to my room to sleep. I met Lord Maxence on the way.
"I have heard it is a little girl." he smiled broadly, he was clearly unperturbed by the birth of a girl.
"Yes, and she is most beautiful, my lord."
"Good and is Rowena well?"
I had thought about what she said, how uncaring and diminished she seemed, but I gave a broad smile that felt false on my lips, "She is. I am sure she is relieved to have a healthy child."
"Well get some rest, Helga. God knows we all need it and thank you for attending to my wife."
I gave him a curtsey and he continued up the stairs to Rowena's room, while I headed down the corridor to my own. I fell into my bed and thought no more about Rowena's look of disbelief.

I had tried not to think about it over the months and then after I left Rowena's home, the years that followed. I had been worried beforehand, every time Helena cried Rowena would nearly jolt out of her chair, her eyes wide with terror. So while the nanny and wet nurse comforted little Helena, I would comfort Rowena. At one point she turned to me, her face as white as a sheet and said,
"I can't mother her. I can't, every time I pick her up she scrunches her face and makes those choking sounds."
"It will come in time, lots of mothers feel overwhelmed and frightened by looking after something so small and precious. And you are young, Rowena, tis natural you are nervous." I soothed, but Rowena just shook her head and gripped her book fiercely when they brought Helena into the library.

I took Helena from them and ticked her tummy, kissing her round cheeks and talking nonsense; she kicked her feet and squealed with laughter. But when I made to put her in Rowena's lap, Rowena's arms remained stiffly by her sides, that look of terror etched on her face. I placed Helena on the rug and she sucked on her toes, while I went to Rowena and removed the book from her hands.
"For now, just pretend you feel confident. No mother knows what she's doing for the first time; this is just learning Rowena, like learning a very difficult spell or potion. But if you fear how to do it, then you'll never be any good. The best thing is to try."
I placed Helena in Rowena's arms and as I instructed she bounced her up and down, a little nervous smile coming to Rowena's lips. I hoped that would be the end of it.

"Mother doesn't like me."
"What?" I said, tidying away the old charcoal used and pieces of paper with Helena's scribbles. I smiled on seeing one of the family crest, the Eagle looked rather bloated. The name at the top and the motto underneath were mere scrawls along the banner.
"Mother does not like me. And I don't like her." Helena said again.
"Of course your mama likes you, she loves you very much." I said, as the little girl, hair tied back in a smooth plait, wearing a light green dress, continued drawing. Helena gave an exaggerated sigh and shook her head.
"No, she doesn't. Mama doesn't like me. Father likes me and you like me, but mama doesn't. And if I ever want to play or talk with her, she won't and she tells me to shush and go away. I am done, can I wash my hands?"

I frowned as Helena placed her dirty hand in mine and we made our way down to the kitchen. Once there I poured a bowl of water for her and fetched a bar of soap, she giggled and splashed the water. I had noticed, it was impossible not to, when Helena greeted her father or me she would coming running out of the house with a cry of 'Father!' or 'Mistress Helga!', give us a hug and a kiss and would tell us all she had been doing that day. With her mother, it was always a polite curtsey, down cast eyes and a whispered, 'Lady Mother'. Rowena would give Helena her blessing, pat her on the head and then make her way indoors, shedding her cloak.
"You mustn't think your mother doesn't love you, she does, very much." I said to Helena, who gave another shrug as though it did not really matter one way or another.
"May we go outside now?"
"Yes, it's stopped raining." I said, "But put on your boots." I watched her scamper away, I felt so sad for Rowena, but then she did nothing to improve relations between herself and her daughter. As soon as she had arrived in the Ravenclaw Hall she had locked herself up in the library, as she did every time. It both angered and pained me, but Rowena would refuse to discuss it.

Her daughter would be seven now. Only three years and she would probably begin to show signs of her inheritance. That was the only thing Rowena asked about, whether her daughter had shown any signs; not her height or whether she ate well or had any accidents, had she performed magic yet? I told her she expected too much from a young child, but Rowena was always determined. She had drafted her daughter's entire education and were it not for Godric and me, I would fear she would plan Helena's entire life. It was fortunate that Helena was a clever child…

"Helga?"
"Hmm?" I looked up, Godric grinned at me and Rowena rolled her eyes.
"Honestly, you have been in a daze all day." Rowena said.
"Sorry, I was preoccupied."
Godric chuckled, "Salazar asked you a question."
"Oh?" I turned to him, a little smirk at the corner of his lips. I cursed myself for looking at his mouth and pressed my lips together. His eyes gleamed with satisfaction and he deliberately rested his chin in his hand, bringing the knuckles close to his lips.
"Sorry? I was miles away." I said.

"I asked if you could go to the markets, while at Caerleon, I know you to have some good wizarding stalls there? I have need for some Hellebore, powdered moonstone and Mallowsweet. I can repay you, of course."
"Alys and I grow mallowsweet. She always keeps a preserve of the dried plant, will that do or I can pick you some fresh from our garden?"
"Dried is fine."
"And the rest I can get you from the market."
"Thank you, Helga." he smirked and lifted his cup to his lips, to hide his delight in seeing me flustered. I scowled at my plate, till I felt one careful finger draw up my left leg and send shivers running through me. I looked over at him, but he continued talking with Rowena on the need of plants from the Forest. While we were gone he would take note of what we had in there and whether any of it could be used. I shifted my leg away, but he grasped my knee with his hand and pulled it back, the hand now trailing lazily on the inside of my thigh. I nervously bit my lip, while Godric and Rowena continued talking.

We decided we were not going to talk late into the evening, as we normally did. Godric said we all needed early starts and Salazar said while he did not, he would prefer to enter the Forest with the sun on his back.
"Make sure you take something to eat." Rowena said, she had become a little mellower as the evening drew on and her stomach was full. Godric laughed.
"You are starting to sound like Helga."
I was unsure why, but the offhand comment somehow irritated me. An unreasonable sense of anger flooded through me, though I soon shook my head and reminded myself not to be so sensitive. It was a ridiculous reason to be angry.

"Well I shall bid you all goodnight." Salazar rose from his chair, clapped Godric on the shoulder and then pulled Rowena's hand to his lips. It was an innocent enough gesture, I knew that. But it was not going to stop that little flame of jealousy roaring up inside me. He smirked at me, then performed the same gesture to me, his eyes gazing up into mine, his breath whispering across my knuckles. After that he gave his well-practiced bow and then left the dining room. Godric stretched lazily in his chair, but Rowena's eyes were narrowed as she gazed in my direction, as though studying me. I knew she would question me if I lingered.

"Well I am to bed." Godric said, I practically leapt up from my seat.
"Me too."
He smiled affectionately at me, "Do you wish me to escort you?"
"No, that's quite all right. You have been so busy; you must want to sleep badly." I was unsure whether Salazar would be in my chambers or not, but having to explain his being there to Godric would be beyond me. Godric rubbed the back of his neck.
"Well I can walk someway with you. For all your kindness, I wished you two hadn't left me in my chair, my neck is killing me."
Rowena swiftly moved upwards and stood behind him, her hand gently stroked Godric's neck, before digging her thumbs and making circles near the base of his scalp. He closed his eyes and let out an appreciative little grumble. I'd go so far to say he purred. In the closeness of the gesture I could feel my cheeks heat up, I felt strangely embarrassed, as though I had intruded on this moment.
"You cats are all the same." Rowena chuckled. Godric peered out the corner of his eye.
"Stroke us in the right way and we're bound to purr." he gave her a wink and Rowena let out a very small giggle.

"Well goodnight." I said, overly brightly. Both Godric and Rowena gave me disgruntled looks, but it was not as though this had been an excessively private moment between the two of them. I left the room quickly, but not before hearing Godric murmur something quietly to Rowena and her little approving sigh in response. Well at least that laid Salazar's doubts to rest, I thought. Whether Godric's father had plans for marriage or no, Godric was not too bothered either way. Though I had never thought he and Rowena would…No matter how unhappy Rowena was in her marriage, she sought out affection and accomplishment from matters that would not hurt her husband; books and learning were her chief joys and love affair. Rowena had always dismissed the desires of the flesh as foolish and ugly, but perhaps that was because she'd never had a clever and attentive lover.

I had been so deep in thought that I had barely noticed making my way down the stairs, now arriving at my room. I glanced back up the stairs, neither Godric nor Rowena were making their way down to go to their towers. Well it was not my concern if they did not; I was not exactly being truthful about my relationship with Salazar. I pulled my door open and walked across my study to my bedroom. The fire in my grate had not died, but flickered across the walls. Salazar gazed into the fire; he had drawn a seat up near the hearth. He did not look up at me when I entered the room, though I kept my eyes on him. I was no longer surprised by his sudden appearances. I picked up my brush on the small table I had for my combs, pins and the badger clasp Rowena had given me for my birthday. I pulled out the twining that held my plait and then unravelled my hair, before pulling the brush through it. I felt his burning gaze on my back, so turned to look at him. He remained watching me, making my movements with the brush feel clumsy and the heat on my cheeks returning once more.

"Godric and Rowena are…" I began, Salazar's lip curled and he turned back to the fire.
"You do realise Rowena let him have his way with her a long time ago?"
I bit my lip and looked down to my feet, only hearing the scrape of the chair as he stood up and the warmth of him drew near me. I felt foolish for not seeing the way Rowena looked at Godric as anything but the gaze of one friend on another.
"God Helga…your innocence is delicious." Salazar murmured, his fingers toying with a strand of my hair, before reaching round the back of my neck and kissing me; his mouth demanding and hot on my own. His other hand reached up to my neck and held me tightly against him. I still felt that little buzz of irritation with what he had said, his accusations of disloyalty and seeking another man, but I found my arms weaving around his neck and shoulders, bringing him closer to me. He shoved me back against the bed, till the back of my knees hit the edge and it was easy for him to knock me off balance. The aching trembling had already begun in my legs and my belly. He roughly shoved my legs apart, bringing up my left to place lingering kisses along my ankle, my calf, up towards my thigh. Nipping along my skin; I was going to have some bruises there by tomorrow, I dreamily thought.

He knelt on the bed, pushing up my dress and then brining both my legs up in his hands.
"Shouldn't I get undressed?" I muttered and I heard his soft chuckle in response. His mouth kissed my belly, gradually inching closer to my thighs and the junction between them. I knew his teasing had already made my flesh tingle, his closed kisses against my thighs made it worse. My breath becoming hot and panting between my lips. He placed his body next to mine, so his lips were near my ear.
"You remember what I told you," he rubbed his groin against mine, "I want to hear you screaming."
His words sent hot rivulets of desire running through me and I whimpered, he went back to my thighs.
"More than that." he smirked and then opening the folds of flesh pressed his hot tongue against the sensitive bud. I nearly jolted up from the bed, but he pushed me flat against it and held me there, while my breaths became shorter and shorter and I wriggled away from his burning tongue. Sharp, almost painful pleasure bursting inside me. He grasped hold of my legs, stopping me from moving and sucked vehemently on the flesh, only releasing me when a cry was wrenched from my throat. He made a small satisfactory noise and came up to my side once more.

"I am going to make you weep for pleasure." he murmured along my ear, making me shiver from anticipation.
"It will not hurt?" I whispered, my throat felt tighter and the words came out faintly.
He began to kiss along my jaw, down my neck, his hands reaching under the over layer of my gown, discarding it onto the floor and pulling at the ties of my corset.
"It may and may not; it depends on how much I want you. And right now, I find myself longing for you, aching to fuck you." His hands clasped my breasts, the fingers drawing over my nipples. I no longer cared; I arched my back into the caress and moaned wantonly. He dropped his head and seized my mouth in his, biting and sucking along my lower lip. Then he pushed me over so I was lying face down on the bed and ran a hand up my back. I felt the tip of his wand nudge the leather ties along my back.
"Lacerandum." He murmured and I felt the sharp snaps of leather breaking. It sent a thrill of delight and fear through me, had he been less careful he could have easily ripped my skin. But his hands were steady, despite the heady smell of desire in the room.

I rolled back over, "You could have hurt me, that spell is dangerous." I said, he smiled boldly down at me.
"But I didn't." he cast aside the wand and pulled down my corset, yanking off the soft shirt beneath, till my breasts spilt out over the top of the corset. He bit his lip and his eyes were now almost black. Salazar pulled me to him, so my breasts pressed against his chest and then lowered me to the bed, his mouth falling over my breast. My hands scrabbled with his tunic and he wrenched it off, then resumed his strong sucking. I knew I wanted him then, his body against mine, the powerful thrust of his hips.
"Salazar please," I begged. He raised his head, that little smile playing on his lips.
"What would you have me do?"
I blinked my eyes open and blushed, his smiled widened and his hand traced a line down my chest towards my groin, were I instinctively bucked my hips up towards his hand. I watched him put two of his fingers inside his mouth and then placed them back between my folds, carefully finding the opening and then pushing inside it. I let out a gasp, then lay back on the bed, the feeling was too overwhelming and I could barely move against those little beckoning motions.

"Sit up." he commanded and I did, though it was still a little painful to do so.
"Untie me." I reached out and undid the laces of his breeches, though as his fingers pushed back and forth inside me I could not help dropping my head back and moaning.
"Come on, Helga. I'd know you'd prefer to have my cock inside you." I scrabbled with the tight bounding, till he pushed down the breeches of his own accord, then swung my legs open wider and instantly thrust inside me. He groaned deeply and pushed my legs wider, beginning to thrust into me.
"Oh God…" I muttered and he gave another chuckle.
"Does it feel good this time?"
"Yes," I nearly screamed. He knew it did. I pulled him closer to me, his hips slamming into mine, his hands first rubbing my legs then grasping my breasts. His thrusting became more rhythmic and I knew this time would feel so good. I was already reaching the peak of my desires; it would not be long till I fell off the edge.

"Salazar…Salazar…" Each thrust I had his name on my lips and at one point my moans became so much he placed a hand over my mouth.
"Shh." he whispered, "My little wanton witch."
That was too much. I fell apart in his arms, panting and groaning into his mouth, the wet warmth pouring out between my legs and my body trembling, under his careful hands. He fell forward into me, his thighs still pushing into me, the sweat along his back slick under my hands and he let himself go with a deep growl.
"Do you think Godric could make you come this way? Do you think he'd be any good?" he says into my neck.
"No…no…" I gasp, not really caring what he said or how I responded. I keep my legs tight around his thighs, not letting him go, keeping him inside me. Salazar breathed heavily on my neck and then gave me a final kiss; he pulled my legs away and rolled over onto his back. I watched him close his eyes, his dark hair in such stark contrast to the white pillows.

I wriggled up to his side and placed my head on his chest, he cautiously opened one eye.
"After all that and you're not even going to kiss me goodnight." I whispered. He grinned, but put his arms around my waist and held me tightly to him.
"No, I'm not." he shut his eyes once more; I smiled and lowered my head to kiss him. He made no response at first, but as I drew a way a little he pulled me back towards him.
"I need to get undressed." I said.
"It's a little too late for that surely?" he smirked.
"Well I cannot sleep like this." I got up and took off my corset, then the skirt underneath, folding them neatly over a chair. I examined the broken leather ties.

"These are ruined."
"You only have yourself to blame for buying leather ones, I've no patience for leather string." He gave me an appreciative look when I pulled off my undershirt and climbed back into bed.
"What will you have me buy then?" I asked, kissing over his chest. He pushed me back on the bed and began to kiss me.
"Ribbons, silk or satin, if you can find them."
"Silk and satin are expensive." I murmured.
"I will pay for them."
"I don't want you to pay for them."
"I will pay for them." he growled, I was not meant to argue.
"What colour?" I murmured, closing my eyes while he ran his mouth over the delicate skin of my inner elbow.
"What do you think?" he leaned back smiling, and then continued the gentle kiss along my skin, "Yellow."

Hehe, Salazar muse got excited and demanded a sex scene! So I wrote one.