Here we go. On with stuff.

Cover Art: Z-ComiX

Chapter 33

There was a curious lack of energy that permeated his entire being. Considering what had happened, he'd have expected more distress, but that seemed absent. Or perhaps it was just distant and muddied. Either way, his body and mind felt spent, and it was like a leaden weight buried deep inside his stomach. The glass of whiskey Brian pushed into his hand didn't help.

"Drink," the man suggested, taking a seat and doing the same.

"I thought we were going to talk."

"You're not in the right state of mind to listen. Take a drink."

Jaune didn't think being drunk was a good state of mind either. Not now of all times. Still, he tipped the glass back and swallowed the foul-tasting concoction. Brian hadn't even bothered to mix the spirit. It was raw and untamed, and burned its way down his throat. The taste was unwelcome, but the kick to his senses wasn't.

Neither was Brian's brutal honesty…

"You fucked up."

"I know."

"I don't mean in a small way either. In the grand scheme of things, a lie is a little thing and ought to be easily forgotten. They're not, though. They hit hard and the memory of them lasts for a long time. Betrayal is even worse, and I imagine she's feeling like you broke her trust right now."

"I KNOW!" Jaune growled, slamming the glass down. His knuckles were white and his teeth ground together. "Do you think I'm stupid or something? I know what I did, Brian. I know that I lied to her. I know that I took advantage of her. She trusted me and I let her down." His shoulder slumped and he sighed into the empty glass. "It's funny in a way. I always wanted a friend I could be myself around and not have to lie to, and then I went and lied to her anyway."

"Old habits are hard to kick. At least you admit the mistake was yours. I hear that's the first step to fixing things."

Not like that helped in any way. The glass rose to his lips once more, and he blinked when he realised it was empty. That didn't last for long, as Brian poured some more into the glass, nodding to the man behind the bar. "Thanks," Jaune said, drinking.

"Why did you do it anyway? The lies, I mean."

"I thought I had to." His finger played with the rim of his glass. "Or maybe I wanted to. I don't know anymore. I wanted Beacon to be my fresh start. I wanted to forget about what I'd been before and be something new. When Yang found me, I didn't even think to tell her the truth. Beacon and the Golden Oyster were always meant to be two distinct places. They were never meant to meet."

"They met the moment you decided to attend Beacon, Jaune. You became the link between them." Brian sighed and leaned back in his seat. He drew forth a cigarette and lit it. "I'm not sure what you expected, but fresh starts don't happen. You can move to a new area and start a new life like the last one never existed, but you still lived it. The past is still a part of you. That won't ever change."

"I wanted to make it change…"

"You're not the only one." Brian let out a cloud of smoke and raised an eyebrow. "What, did you think you were? Don't be so arrogant. Everyone is running away from something. You've spent all your time running away from what you used to be, and now you want to run away from what you had to become to survive. She did the same in reverse."

"She…?"

"Nina. Except instead of running from the Oyster to be a Huntress, she ran from being a Huntress to be a stripper. She tried to hide her past, too. Act like it never happened. Like it never existed." He paused. "How do you imagine that went?"

Not well if its inclusion in the current conversation was any indication. Jaune didn't have the energy to say that, however, and shrugged his shoulders instead. Brian growled, but didn't give up.

"Not well at all," he continued. "The past has a nasty habit of catching up with you. It can take weeks, months, or even years – but catch up it does. Part of me thinks it only gets worse the longer it takes."

Jaune tried not to care. He really did. There was no hiding his curiosity, however. "What happened?"

"Her team found her." Brian growled. "They came in one day, and I've no idea how they located her. Hell, we didn't even know she was ex-huntress, or the circumstances behind it. All we knew was that two people walked up onto the stage and grabbed her by her hair in the middle of a show. They weren't kind, Jaune. Not at all. Bitch. Whore. Slut… They were angry, that much was obvious. Maybe they had a reason to be. It seems obvious now that she never told them the truth either. All they knew was that one day their leader vanished, and that when they eventually found her, she'd given up being their teammate to take her clothes off for tips." He shook his head and sighed. "I was enamoured of her back then. I saw those two women grab her and rushed in to try and save her. I didn't realise they were huntresses."

"That can't have gone well…"

"It didn't." Brian traced a hand down his chest. "They cut me good. It was instinctive on their part. I don't think they meant to, or that they even realised what they'd done, but I attacked from behind, and you know what they say about doing that to someone trained to kill Grimm. Nina went insane. Beat the shit out of them, and then blamed herself for what happened."

"Was that really her fault?"

Brian glanced at him and smiled. "Yeah, it was."

"What?"

"You expected me to be on her side, I take it?"

Honestly, yes. Brian and Nina were inseparable. Along with being main acts like himself, they were a legendary couple in the club. They'd always seemed so happy with one another, and he personally knew just how much of a loving relationship they had. To then hear Brian say such things about her…? It was unheard of.

"I love Nina," he said. "I really do, but that doesn't mean I have to be blind to her mistakes. When she lost her partner, it was because of one such mistake. She messed up a mission; made a bad call. Her best friend paid the price with his life and the team fell into disrepair. At least, that's the story I pieced together after the fact. Nina decided being a huntress wasn't for her, but knew her teammates wouldn't accept that. So, she snuck off one night. Came to Vale and decided to make her fresh start." He tapped Jaune's nose. "Just like you."

"And that's when they found her?"

"Yeah. It took a year. It's a long way from Mistral to Vale, and they had no idea where to find her. The team loved her though, and were hurting after the loss of one of their own. They thought she was hurting, too – and that she needed their help. Quite the shock when they found her." Brian sighed. "The thing is, if Nina told the truth from the start then a lot of it could have been avoided. Her teammates wouldn't have wanted her to leave, true, but the decision would have always been hers. She was so afraid of earning their hate that she chose to rob them of the chance entirely and ran away. That only hurt them more. What would you think if one of your teammates vanished without a word like that?"

"I'd be worried."

"Exactly. The longer it took them to find her, the more the fear piled up. When they eventually did come across her, to find her not only fine, but living a new life entirely? All that fear. All that concern… it overflowed and turned into something else. They felt betrayed, and you know what? They had a right to feel that way. Nina lied to them. She lied because she thought it would be easier than telling the truth, that it would somehow hurt less. When the truth caught up with her, it was all she could do to watch her life crash down around her ears."

"What happened?" Jaune asked. It must have been before he was part of the Oyster, so he knew she remained. Still, his teacher had never talked about this.

"Nina fought the two to a standstill." Brian said. "She was stronger than both of them combined, but it didn't really solve anything. They felt betrayed. They couldn't understand why she'd let not only them down, but spat on her fallen teammate's memory by running away to be a whore. She tried to explain it to them, but it was too late for that." He shrugged. "Maybe if she'd tried from the beginning, things would have been better – but they'd given up a year and a half of their lives to try and save a teammate they thought was in trouble. Any bridges there had once been were burned beyond all recognition."

Jaune struggled to breathe. His heart beat rapidly in his chest and he wiped some sweat from his brow. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?" he asked. "Or is this some way of driving home how much I screwed up?"

"It's neither. Think of it more as advice… but also a warning. You've been so busy trying to not be Crimson, but that's nonsense. You are who you are. He's not a part of you. He is you. He's you in the same way Nina was still a team leader and a huntress. Running away didn't change that for her, and it isn't going to for you either."

"What, then? I have to live like this forever?"

"No. People change all the time. Thing is, they change slowly, and they don't pretend the past never happened. If you really want to move on from this, then you need to accept it's a part of who you are. Crimson and Jaune aren't two separate entities. Neither was Nina the dancer and Nina the huntress. Once she learned that, she became a damn sight happier. She stopped holding back, too. Allowed herself to love and feel loved, and we got married a bit after that. It was a nice happy ending."

"Except for her team…"

"And that's where the warning part comes in," Brian said. He leaned forward, looking deep into Jaune's eyes. "Nina lost them forever. She lost them because she was afraid to lose them, because she was afraid to face their anger and decided to lie, instead. She lost them because she made the same mistake you did with Yang."

"Then it's over…"

"No!" Brian slapped his arm. It wasn't hard, he was just a civilian, but it startled him nonetheless. "There's a big ass difference between what happened with her and you. Nina hurt her team, but she hurt them over a long period of time. Where you lied to your girl for weeks, Nina lied for well over a year. She left them when they were grieving – when they were at their most vulnerable." He poked a finger into Jaune's chest. "You, on the other hand, haven't done that… yet."

Something slapped against Jaune's face, and he reached out instinctively to catch the metal object that slipped down over his nose. It was a key ring with a set of keys on.

"That's for my old apartment," Brian said. "Nina and I will be staying at her place tonight, but you've got the use of mine if you want it."

"Thanks…"

Brian ignored him. "That said, I meant what I said earlier. Admitting you made a mistake is only the first step on the road to fixing it. There's more. If you feel like you can't accept who you are, that you're too afraid to face a little pain, or that you're not willing to take the risk… then sleep at my apartment tonight. I'll bring you a bacon bun in the morning and we'll sort things out. You can say goodbye to Yang, though. She'll probably never talk to you again."

Jaune's body froze. The keys suddenly felt like they weighed several tonnes. He could barely breathe, let alone form coherent thought.

"On the other hand, you can go back to Beacon. You can take a risk and push the boat out. Try to apologise to her. Try to explain, to make amends and fix this shit."

"She'd never forgive me…"

"She might not," Brian agreed. "She might hate you forever. She might shout things at you. She might not want anything to do with you ever again. That's what makes it a risk. All conventional logic says you've ruined your chance, Jaune. Let's be honest about that. But if you don't try and fix things…? Well, in that case it's definitely over."

"So you're basically saying I should risk everything on the off-chance Yang somehow forgives me?"

"I'm not saying anything. The choice is yours. It's whether you can live with the consequences of knowing you never tried." He shrugged and stood up, clapping a hand on Jaune's shoulder. "I've got to go and meet with Nina. Make your own choices in life, but remember that it's you alone that has to live with them. If Nina had broken her silence to talk with her team before they found her, it might have fixed things. It might not have, but she'd have at least been able to get her side of the story out. Instead, she left it too long."

"I'll think about it," Jaune sighed. He looked down at the apartment keys and pocketed them.

Brian nodded and stepped away from the table. Before he left entirely, he paused. "Oh, one last thing…"

Jaune looked up.

"If you do decide to try and apologise to her, keep in mind that you're not the only one who needs to say sorry. You wronged her, but Crimson did as well. Nothing's going to chance until you accept that." The door of the pub swung shut behind him, leaving Jaune behind.

Jaune sighed and looked back down at his half-empty glass. It still didn't taste any better, but it helped. He raised it to his lips, and paused as he smelled it. The booze would dull his senses and make the pain hurt less. He sighed and put it down. His hand slammed down beside it, pushing himself up as he moved towards the door.

Dulling the pain wouldn't fix anything.

Sitting around in Vale wasn't going to fix anything. There was only one place he could be.

/-/

It was Blake who opened the door to RWBY's dorm. She was dressed in a gown and barefoot, but the way her eyes narrowed the moment she saw him removed any notion she wasn't capable of violence. Her mouth opened, but clicked shut again as her eyes darted back into the room.

"Who is it?" Weiss asked, clearly agitated. "Tell them to go away!"

"It's no one," Blake replied. "I'll deal with it." She slammed the door shut behind her and took a step forward. He took one back, but that didn't stop her following. "What are you doing here?" she hissed. "What did you do to Yang?"

"Is Yang in there?"

"That's none of your business. She came back in tears. My partner came back in tears. Yang! I've never seen her cry before." Her fingers wrapped about his collar, dragging him close. "What. Did. You. Do?"

"So she is there," he gasped. "Please, I need to talk to her."

"If you think I'll…" Blake sighed. She let go of him and stepped back. "You're not talking to her. You're not even going to see her. Not when she's like this. You wouldn't look so anxious if you didn't know what happened. Yang can barely speak. Tell me what happened."

It was no request. Blake's eyes bore into his, and made clear he wouldn't get past her without the truth. Before, he might have held back, lied. Now, he knew better. He told the faunus everything. From start to finish, he laid it out.

When he was finished, her hand caught him across the cheek.

"I deserve that," he whispered.

"You deserve worse," Blake hissed. "Be thankful I don't have my weapon on me. How could you? I thought you trusted her. I thought she was your friend! No." She shook her head and turned away. "Forget it. I think we're done here."

"No, wait." He grabbed her wrist to stop her, but soon realised what a mistake that was. Blake spun easily, no hint of fear in her eyes as she twisted his arm up over her head and down again, holding his arm at an odd angle.

She pressed down with one hand on the back of his elbow. "Let go," she said, voice calm. "I'm not letting you see her."

His bone creaked, pain flaring up his arm. Sweat beaded on his brow as well, but he clenched his teeth together and tried to ride it out. If he let go now, then Blake would escape. He'd never get to tell his side of the story or apologise to Yang. "No," he whispered. "I need to talk to her. I need to fix this."

"I'll break your arm, Jaune."

"I… I don't care. If that's the price to pay, so be it."

Blake watched him for the longest time. Her eyes were locked onto his, her left arm ready to push down and break his at the elbow. He met her gaze, and tried to somehow push his intent onto her. The faunus sighed and moved her arm away. She grabbed his wrist and squeezed it hard instead, popping his fingers open.

She didn't flee back into her dorm, however.

"Yang came rushing back in clear pain," she growled. "It was obvious something was wrong the moment she arrived, but she did her usual routine and tried to hide it. Ruby noticed instantly, of course. It only took a little prodding and a hug before she broke down. She's busy trying to get the truth out of Yang, but she's keeping quiet. Weiss has no idea what to do, but is hovering around protectively, and I'm stood out here looking at a dead man. Give me one good reason I shouldn't leave you here – or worse – tell Ruby you're outside and responsible for all of this."

Not this again. Not again! The last person to ask him for one good reason had been Yang, and he'd failed to provide one. There'd been no good answer he could give, and that led to her walking away. He couldn't let that happen again here. He had to give Blake something. Anything…

His mind was blank.

"Nothing?" she asked, not even surprised. She turned away with a sigh. "I'm not even sure why I-"

"Because I love her."

Blake froze. "What?"

"Because I love her," he repeated desperately. "That's my reason. I want to fix this. I want to make it better because I know I've made a mistake, but I don't want to leave it at that. I don't want to let a mistake I made come between us."

"You love her? This is a strange way of showing it." Blake turned back and crossed her arms. "I realise I'm probably the last person in the world to preach about keeping secrets. I lied about what I was and never brought up the White Fang, but that was different. I lied about what I used to be. I didn't lie about what I was. I didn't say one thing, but do another. Even if my secret was more dangerous, I didn't purposefully mislead any of my teammates."

"I know," he said. He did. She'd been a terrorist in the past, but she'd stopped being that. In the example of Nina's story, Blake's lies had been more akin to what she'd done with Brian. She hadn't informed her team she was ex-White Fang, but it wasn't like she had done it for any malicious intent. "Mine was worse. I purposefully told Yang she could trust me, and used the secrets she gave me in confidence to my own advantage. I didn't always do it for myself, though. It was because of those that I was able to find and help you!"

"When I ran away," Blake finished, letting out a short sigh. "I wondered about that. A few cases where you did to help her don't erase your guilt, Jaune."

"I'm not saying they do. I'm just… I'm saying that I want to make amends. I want to make things better again." He got down on one knee. "Please Blake, you have to believe me."

"Get up," she snapped, looking around. "Seriously, people will get all sorts of wrong impressions if they see you doing that to me of all people. That's the last thing this situation needs." She ran a hand down her face and glanced back to her dorm. With a sigh, she took his arm and led him a small distance away. "I believe you," she said, "I do. To be honest, I believed you even before I heard all of this. You wouldn't have kept it a secret from her unless you were afraid of what would happen. I know what it feels like to be afraid of losing people over a secret. That's why I kept yours." Her eyes hardened. "Still, that doesn't change what you did. Yang feels like she's been made a fool of, but it goes deeper than that. She's not had the best of pasts, Jaune. I know yours was worse objectively, but that's not how it works. Everyone's pain is their own, and Yang's been abandoned by people she thought loved her before."

"I know. I want to make things right."

Blake sighed. "Jaune, I do believe you, but this isn't so easy. Yang's in the worst of states right now. There's no way she's going to agree to talk to you. She's in pain, hurt, and has probably cried herself to sleep by now. Give her some time to rest. It'll hardly help that if you even admit you were involved at all, then Weiss will probably run you through with a ball-point pen. She isn't used to having people she cares about, and less so seeing them in pain. She's like a coiled spring."

At any other point, he'd have been relieved to hear she had people looking out for her, but right now, he couldn't care less. He didn't want to delay this now and leave Yang thinking he'd never tried.

"I think you should get some rest, Jaune. Come and try again tomorrow when she's had a chance to rest."

Blake was right. He knew that. If Yang really was as bad as she'd said, then the last thing she would want was to see him. There was no reason to doubt Blake either, not with how honest her reactions were. She wasn't one to mince words. Still, Brian's words continued to haunt him.

"I'll go if you'll do one thing for me."

Blake wasn't amused. "I don't think you're in a position to be making demands."

"It's not a demand. Can you just let Yang know I was here? You can do it however you want – say whatever you want. Just please don't let her think I didn't try to apologise to her. I want her to know I tried."

"If that's what it takes, I'll agree."

"Promise me."

Blake rolled her eyes. "I promise. I'll tell her when you're gone, or tomorrow if she's already fallen asleep."

Jaune nodded. "Thank you, Blake."

She didn't return the gesture. She rolled her eyes instead and headed back to her dorm, opening the door with one hand. She paused before closing it, maybe considering words for him. A threat, a warning, whatever she had in mind. In the end, she shook her head and closed it behind her, leaving him alone in the corridor.

The adrenaline that had kept him going departed as quickly as it had come on. Every part of his body said to go back to Brian's apartment and sleep. Things might make sense in the morning, and he felt too muddled to think right now. Sleep wouldn't come easily, but exhaustion would kick in eventually. His dorm here was another option, but he didn't want to burden his teammates with this. It would be best to sleep in Vale…

"You can say goodbye to Yang, though."

Jaune's feet wouldn't move. He stood in the middle of the corridor, the rain pounding down outside a nearby window. Hadn't she already said goodbye? Hadn't he already lost her? It was hard to imagine their relationship staying strong after what he'd done. Had they still just been friends, she might have forgiven him, but they'd taken the next step and become something much more serious. She'd opened herself up, and he'd done the same.

Except that he'd kept some things back.

She'd been honest, he'd lied. It was just like Brian said; he'd waited too long and made things worse. Things would have been even more dramatic if we'd officially come out as being together and then she found out. I should have told her weeks ago. What's the worst that could have happened?

Yang would have been furious. She'd have probably beaten him up for lying to her, and for the embarrassment of him knowing her dirty little secret. She'd have known his in turn however, and neither of them would have spread it. Things would have been awkward… but he had a feeling they'd have pulled through.

Could they still pull through now? He wasn't sure.

He wasn't sure.

Not sure…

Jaune's eyes narrowed. He analysed the thought in his mind, but no matter how much he considered it, the facts didn't change. He had no idea whether this could be fixed or not. Where that should have left him filled with despair, he instead felt something far more horrifying. Hope.

"Always remember, Jaune. Those who choose to do nothing are destined to lose everything."

Nina's words had never felt so apt, nor had he ever understood them as much as he did now. She'd done nothing. She'd lost everything. That warning had been one spoken from experience, and no doubt an attempt on her part to ensure he never made the same mistake she had. He'd made that mistake either way.

Jaune's eyes hardened.

That didn't mean he had to live with that mistake.

He turned away from Team RWBY's dorm, but also from his own. There was no time to sleep, not here, nor in Vale. The dance was tomorrow – or later today. In a little over twelve hours, in fact. He had to move fast.

"I'll show you, Yang," he whispered. "I'll prove it to you."

/-/

Yang had never felt so tired in her life. She was laid in her bed, the lights in the dorm finally switched off. A hand was thrown over her midriff, and she could feel Ruby pressed against her back, the two of them sharing the bottom bunk. How long had it been since they shared a bed? It was probably back after Summer had died, and Ruby needing comfort to deal with the pain. They'd grown up since then and the need for such had faded.

That made the current situation all the more ironic.

Two years older than her, and I'm the one being needing comfort. How pathetic. She smiled regardless. Ruby's love was a constant. That, at least, would never leave her. Inevitably, as they had all night, her thoughts turned back to the one who had caused all this pain in the first place. Jaune, Crimson, whatever he wanted to call himself. He was an orphan from the streets, so his name could be made up, too.

How many lies were there? If he'd lied about his identity and job, there could be more. He'd lied about her secrets being secure and lied when she'd asked if she could trust him. Lied when she asked if he was her friend. It was just more and more and that raised the biggest question of all.

Had he life about his feelings?

Did he return hers at all, or had that all been a lie, too? An entertainer's job was to make women happy, right? Well, he'd failed at that – but it had worked for a while. She'd been happy. Just like every woman who passed lien his way, he made them feel desired, wanted, loved.

That didn't make any of it real.

Yang's scroll flickered to life. It didn't ring, but the light pulsed back and forth, alerting her to a message. She considered ignoring it, but morbid curiosity made her open it up. There was only a single message. To her relief, it wasn't from him. Why would Blake send her a text message? They were in the same room. She strained to see her partner, but she was on the bunk below and it was too dark. She opened it up.

He was here earlier. He wanted to talk with you.

Yang sniffled. It was almost enough to wake Ruby, who murmured something behind her. Luckily, the younger girl snuggled back into the warmth of Yang's back. Had she been in the right mind, she'd have understood the message in an instant, but lack of sleep and the copious tears she'd shed hadn't helped in that regard.

Who? She sent back. The reply was immediate.

Jaune.

She stared at the screen. The single word didn't mean anything for a few seconds, or perhaps that was just the time it took to filter through her mind. When it eventually did, she felt a lurching sensation inside of her. It was impossible to tell whether it was good or bad.

Another message appeared.

He said he wanted to fix things.

Another…

He said he loves you.

He's lying, Yang typed back angrily. She turned off her scroll and tossed it off the bed, making it clear to Blake the conversation was over. Her eyes were damp, and she buried them in her pillow. How was she supposed to trust him after what he'd done? He hadn't even given her a reason for all of this. How could he then just come here and claim to love her?

She refused to believe it.

But that didn't stop something inside of her stirring.

Moving on toward the end… I am aware that in terms of Black Moments, this one seems fairly tame compared to my other stories. That mean reason for that was that I didn't want to regurgitate the plot of the show again, and that always leads to the usual black moment of "We're all going to die".

Fatal harm is a good black moment and consequence of failure, don't get me wrong – but I already used it in Stress Relief, and didn't want to do the same here. I wanted a more "the relationship is ending" vibe. Is it less dramatic than death? Yeah, kind of… but as anyone who's been in that situation can attest, it still feels like the worst torture.

Next Chapter: 18th July

P a treon . com (slash) Coeur