Kelda woke the next morning, stretched, felt herself smiling. She rolled out of the rumpled bed and dressed, caught sight of her reflection in the mirror. She fingered a bite mark on her shoulder, blushing.
"You're grinning like an idiot," she told herself, mock-stern, and then surprised herself by laughing aloud.
She bounded out through the curtains, humming to herself. Juno squeaked, the book she'd been reading tumbling out of her hands and into the fountain.
"Good morning!" Kelda cried. "Here, let me!"
She fished the book out of the fountain and paused, looking at the cover.
"'Mysteries of the Goddess of Love'," she read. "Mind if I borrow this?"
"Um..."
"Thanks!"
She practically skipped away, singing to herself. Juno watched her go, shook her head.
"Everybody here is crazy," she muttered. "Completely crazy."
She rose, fixing her hair, swayed into the throne room.
"Gnarl?" she called. "Gnarl, is the Master in?"
The odd little creature looked up at her, weathered face creasing in a smile. She shifted, uncomfortable with the certainty that he was staring at her breasts.
"No, I'm sorry, Mistress, he left late last night. Although I could keep you company, if you like."
"No," she said hastily. "That won't be necessary."
She returned to her quarters, sighed, looking down at her luggage. She poked her head out of her room, beckoning to a minion.
"Excuse me. Hey, excuse me! Come in here, I need help unpacking."
"Yes, mistress!"
It dropped the fan it was holding with a clatter and scampered into her room, grinning up at her. She sighed, crossing her arms over her chest.
"Hang those dresses up, will you? And find a place for my jewelry."
"Yes, yes!" It began to open a chest, eager, but she stopped it with a firm hand.
"No, I'll handle those, thank you."
She pulled out a variety of scented oils and face paints, stacking them carefully on a vanity. Juno handled her own cosmetics, just as a legionnaire handled his own sword. She opened a hidden compartment, surveyed an array of glass vials full of aphrodisiacs, and smirked.
She heard something tear behind her and whirled, swearing. A lacy pair of knickers dangled from the minion's claw. It looked up at her, ears drooping.
"Oops."
"Get out!" She snapped. "Those cost almost a hundred Imperials, you filthy little cretin! Out!"
The minion yelped and scampered out. Juno picked up the ruined lace and sighed.
"I need decent servants," she said petulantly. "I can't believe I have to do everything myself."
She finished unpacking her gowns, fondling the soft fabric, remembering past conquests. She'd worn this green dress when she'd first met Senator Flavius, who had poisoned his own wife for her favor. She'd worn this golden little number when she'd convinced General Livius to wipe out that pesky little Elvish colony- the Elves had the nerve to settle on her favorite sunbathing beach! And she'd been wearing this blue toga the day when silly old what's-his-name had thrown himself into the Arena, after she'd spurned him on account of his being too damn poor.
She sighed happily, buoyed up by the memory of past victories. She was Juno, for gods' sake. Poets had written odes to her, had driven themselves mad for her love. Men fought duels over her, had even gone to war for her. She smiled, sorting through her perfumes, applied a dab of scent between her breasts. A mere rough-spun peasant girl was nothing compared to her.
Juno glanced around her room, thinking. She was finished unpacking, although she could certainly use some new clothes to suit her new environment. Perhaps something slinky. She made her way to the throne room.
"Gnarl?" she asked, pouting. "Gnarl, I reeeally need to go shopping."
"Shopping?" the old minion asked her suspiciously. "What do you mean, 'shopping'?"
"I just need some odds and ends.,..some new lip paint, maybe a bit of jewelry. You know what I mean?"
"Er, I'm afraid I don't, Mistress."
"I'm going down to the village market." The peasant girl stood on the portal, adjusting a pack on her back. "I have a few things I want to buy. You can come with, if you want."
Juno eyed her suspiciously. Kelda sighed.
"Look, I'm not going to try to stab you again, alright? I talked to the wit- to the Master, and we worked some things out."
"Hmph," Juno said. "Well, then, I accept your apology."
"It wasn't-" Kelda began, then shrugged. "Never mind."
She eyed the other woman, who was wearing nothing but a thin toga that left little to the imagination.
Full of valuable information about the Empire, Kelda thought.
"You'll catch your death if you go out in that, though," she said. "I might have a coat you could wear. You'll want boots, too. Come on."
-x-
Juno stared down at herself as they walked to the market, wrinkling her nose.
"I look like a peasant," she complained. "Don't you have anything more stylish?"
"That's the only other coat I have," Kelda snapped.
Juno was wearing a long fur of black and white. The witch boy had brought Kelda back the skin of some massive bear, and she'd made it into a long coat. Juno stamped her feet in the unfamiliar boots and frowned.
"Your feet are huge," she complained. "My feet are just swimming in here!"
"I'm starting to regret taking you along," Kelda growled.
Juno fell mercifully silent for a moment.
"Hey, peasa- er, Kelda."
"What?"
"Do you have a lot of earth quakes around here?"
"Not really, why?"
"Well, it's just, last night everything was shaking, and- what's so funny?"
"Nothing."
Juno looked around critically, stepping gingerly through the snow.
"So," she said. "This is where you grew up? It's awfully...primitive."
"I like it well enough."
"Kelda." Juno pressed closer to her. "Why is everybody staring at us?" She frowned, nervously twirling a strand of hair around her finger. "They don't look very happy to see us."
"Most likely they're not too happy to see you, Empire. This town spent thirteen years under the Empire's heel, and the folk here aren't too quick to forget that."
"But...people like me," Juno protested. "I'm pretty!"
"Don't wander off," Kelda told her. "Come on, the market's down this way."
Juno sniffed critically, looking around.
"This is your market?" she asked. "Where's the stalls selling the latest fashions? I don't even see a shoe stall anywhere!"
"There's a cobbler further into town. He can fix your boots if they need fixing."
"Boots?" Juno said despairingly. "What if I want a new pair of sandals? Or heels?"
The merchants were muttering to each other as they passed. Townspeople were trickling out of the market, mothers snatching children back as they walked by.
"Witch whore," she heard someone hiss behind her.
Juno spun, cheeks flaming, furious. A meat merchant gripped a cleaver, slammed it ferociously into the side of a seal. She winced, then realized that he wasn't looking at her- his burning gaze was fixed on Kelda's back.
If Kelda heard him, she gave no sign. She strode briskly to a stall hung with herbs and branches, manned by a mousy little woman. Kelda smiled at her, recognizing her from the slave barracks.
"Morning! It's Regna, right?"
Regna looked up, her eyes darting between the two of them, offered a shy smile.
"Yes, that's right." The butcher sank his cleaver into the counter of his stall with a curse, and Regna's eyes flicked to him, back to the two of them. "Can- can I help you?"
"I need a few bunches of woundwort, if you have any. I'd also like a few bushels of snowberries."
"O-of course." The woman hesitated, flushing. "Although, snowberries are hard to come by this time of year, so I'll- I'll have to charge you, er, triple."
"Triple?" Kelda exclaimed. "What the hell? Regna, I grew up around here. Snowberries grow all year 'round, they've never been scarce."
"Uh..." the woman looked panicked. "Well, with the Empire occupation...and...and..."
"Regna, what's going on?"
The woman leaned closer, conspiratorial.
"I have to charge you more, you see, or people will start to talk."
"What are you talking about? Is it because of this Imperial? I'm not really that fond of her, if you must-"
"No, Kelda, it's not her." Regna twisted her fingers in her skirt, looking embarrassed. "It's you."
"What?"
"Ever since you took up with...with the Overlord, ma'am- long may he live- well, people have been talking, and...and it's not very nice, I'm sorry, and if I'm seen being all...all friendly-like with you, well, I could lose business."
"I've lived here my whole life!" Kelda snapped. "Don't be ridiculous!"
"I'm sorry, Kelda, ma'am. That's just the way it is."
"Huh." Kelda frowned. "Regna, can I ask you a question?"
"Yes, ma'am?"
"When that one soldier was following you around and wouldn't let you alone, who saw him off with a broken nose?"
"You did."
"That's right." She raised her voice. "And in the winter, when there was nothing to eat because the Empire took it all, who was it who brought back the most game and made sure everybody had enough to eat?"
"You did," Regna muttered, flushing.
"And you, Erling!" Kelda turned, put her hands on her hips. "I see you skulking back there. When your mother took sick, who was it that went out into a blizzard to find help?"
"You, Miss," a man muttered into his beard, shame-faced.
The butcher slammed his cleaver into the wood, swearing under his breath. Kelda whirled and stalked up to him until they were almost nose to nose.
"Hello, Lief. Did you have something you wanted to say to me?"
He glared down at her. She smiled back, dangerous.
"If you have something to say to me, Lief, please, say it loud. We can settle this here and now."
The butcher swallowed, looking away. Kelda's eyes narrowed.
"You always were a coward." She looked around the market, still smiling. "I might not like the lot of you, and you may not like me, but don't you ever forget what I've done for you. Keep that in mind, and we'll get along fine."
She turned back to Regna in the thunderous silence.
"So. About those berries?"
"Ah, yes!" Regna scurried to bring them to her. "That will be- um- one copper, please."
"Regna, really?"
"Um, I mean, three coppers for the lot."
"Thank you." Kelda handed her the coins. "All I've ever wanted is for things to be fair."
Juno yawned, and Kelda arched an eyebrow at her.
"Bored?"
"Peasant politics are boring," Juno complained, examining her nails. "All that seemed a bit unnecessary, really. You can just pay people enough, and they'll like you. Why quibble over a couple of coppers? Gods know we can afford it."
"If you pay people enough, they'll pretend to like you."
"Ugh. Same difference, in the end." Juno looked around, caught the eye of a merchant. He was young, and not half-bad looking for a Northerner. "Hmm. I'm going to wander around this market of yours. See if I can't find anything interesting."
"Suit yourself."
Juno strolled to the stall and began idly sorting through the odds and ends on display. It was a pathetic offering, really- the merchant seemed to offer little more than crude wooden carvings and various bits and bobs that had clearly seen better days.
"Can I help you, miss?" the shop keeper asked eagerly.
"Hmm, I don't know." Juno spared him a glance. "This is all rather...quaint."
"That's a lovely coat, miss, if you don't mind me saying so."
"Really?" She preened.
"I've never seen anything like it."
"It's the latest thing," she told him haughtily, trying on a ring. "What do you think of this, does it suit me?"
"Oh, very well, miss!"
"It's a little dull," she said sadly. "You wouldn't happen to have anything more suitable, would you?"
"Well..." he hesitated. "Since you're a fine lady, I'll show this to you."
He reached down and pulled out a heavy wood box, opened it to reveal a heavy gold necklace. The workmanship was exotic, like nothing Juno had seen before, covered in strange runes and jagged angles. It drew her eye through wild curves and sharp declines, dazzling her.
"Oh, that is pretty," she gasped, astounded to find something like it in Nordberg, of all places. "Wherever did you find it?"
Kelda walked up beside her and stared down at it, frowning.
"Yes," she echoed. "Where did you get this?"
"My brother's a hunter, ma'am. He brought it back after one of his trips out in the hills."
"It's not from Nordberg, that's for sure." She glanced at Juno. "I don't think it's Empire, either, is it?"
"No, I've never seen anything quite like it before."
"It's not Elvish, either. How much do you want for it?"
"I saw it first!" Juno protested.
"For you, ma'am, I could part with it for a thousand Imperials."
Kelda just looked at him. He quailed.
"Eight hundred Imperials?"
She tapped her foot.
"Five hundred?"
"Hmm."
"Three hundred, ma'am, and that's my final offer!"
"Alright."
"That's not fair!" Juno snapped. "I saw it first, I want it!"
"You can have it." Kelda tucked it into her pack. "I just want to show it to Gnarl first. See if he knows who made it."
"Oh." Juno paused, thinking. "So...since you're currently First Mistress...does that mean that you control the purse?"
"What do you mean, currently?"
Juno linked an arm through hers and gave her a charming smile.
"Because I could really use some more money for some new clothes."
"I'm- I'm really not sure." Kelda tugged at her arm, trying to free it. "I'll think about it."
They stepped onto the portal together, Juno squeaking as it swept them below. Kelda, growing used to the transition, landed with ease.
"Oh, gods." Juno clung to her arm, looking pale. "That never feels right."
"You'll get used to it."
"Oh." Juno straightened, smiling. "Hello, tall, dark, and handsome."
"Witch boy!" Kelda said happily.
He looked up, sitting on the rough throne, minions straining to hold up piles of books and maps in front of him.
"Juno. Your information served us well. We have established a foothold in the Empire."
"My old home." She drifted to his side, looking down at the maps. "I never thought I'd see it like this."
She sounded almost...sad. Kelda looked at her sharply, wondering if she had misjudged her.
"We need a way into the city. Any suggestions?"
"Hmm." She leaned over his shoulder, her hand brushing his as she traced a painted finger along the map. "I've been to this manor before. It belongs to a Senator...he's more interested in wine and women than defense, and when I was there, at least, there weren't many soldiers, which was a shame...I like a man in uniform. If you take these lands, you'd be able to hold the whole port."
"Hmm," he said thoughtfully. "Yes, that could work."
"I'm not just a pretty face," she said smugly. "I listened when men in the Empire talked, a lot of the time. It's amazing what you can learn."
"I never thought you were just a pretty face."
Juno stopped, taken aback. She'd never heard that before.
"Well," she said, color rising. "Hmm. Thank you." She studied him. "So...I haven't asked you. What should I call you? Did she call you Witch Boy?"
She nodded at Kelda, who glared, putting a hand on her hip.
"Is that your name?"
He made an amused noise.
"No, that's not my name. I don't have a name."
"What? But everything has a name!"
"'Master' will do, if you like."
"I think I do."
She smiled at him coyly, and Kelda rolled her eyes.
"Come on, Juno, you can help me go through the clothes from the old tower. You'll like that."
"But I-"
Kelda gave her an arch look, and Juno sighed.
"Oh, very well. I'll see you later...Master."
She hooked her arm through Kelda's and strolled away. Kelda glanced over her shoulder and gave him a truly wicked smile. He watched the sway of her hips as she walked away, humming.
The Overlord shook his head, set the maps aside.
"Gnarl," he said.
"Yes, my lord?"
"Yesterday they were trying to kill each other. Now, they appear to be friends. What happened?"
"I have no idea, sire."
"I don't think I'll ever understand women."
"Who among us does, sire, really?"