Disclaimer: I own nothing except my imagination.

a/n: Also keep in mind that this story was written as a chapterless story therefore when I edit it so chapters makes sense, they can be very long ones. Hope you enjoy. Oh and thank you to everyone who reviews and follows this story.

CASEY's POV

My phone was sitting next to me during lunch in case I would get a call. I didn't usually have any but just in case something was wrong and Griffin or Ben needed to talk to me since they were living with me. As if on cue, it buzzed on the table.

"This is Matt. Yeah, I'll be right there."

"Chief, I have to go take care of a problem with Griffin at school. Is it ok if I take care of this, my radio will be on."

"Go take care of it. I'll have Hermann cover you as lieutenant."

"Thanks chief." I went quickly to my truck in direction to Griffin's school."

Abbey's POV

I was debating if I should go now or wait after shift before heading out to the Fire Academy but decided now was as good a time as ever.

"Dawson, I have an errand to run, is it ok if I go, I'll keep my radio on.

"Sure, we probably won't get anything eventful."

"Thanks."

It took me about fifteen minutes to reach my destination. This place use to feel like a myth to me but in the past year, it felt like it was the only place that could still the craziness in my brain. In front of me stood the Fire Academy. I opened the front door and walked directly in front of the wall that held all the badges of the fallen firefighters. Surprisingly, in the past year, a great amount of firefighters had gone down on the line of duty and one of the latest was Andy Darden. He had left two young sons and a wife behind. As much as I was hurting at twenty five, I was sorry for these two kids who had lost their father so young. The absence of sound here could do wonders and every time I felt restless or anger started building up, this is the place where I would come. In this moment of silence, I started crying tears that I didn't really see coming. Unfortunately, my moment was interrupted by a familiar voice.

"There is no greater love than to lay ones life down for another. This badge case stands as a memorial for our fallen firefighters and paramedics who gave their lives in service of the citizens of Chicago."

"My dad's badge is there?"

"Yup, it's right there." He pointed at Darden's badge in the case.

"My dad's badge is up there too." I turned around with slightly puffy eyes and offered Matt a smile.

"What happened?" Griffin was extremely curious.

"He tried saving his friend that was a firefighter too and he saved chief Boden. He was a hero, just like your dad."

"I miss him." He started crying and I enveloped him in a hug.

"I do too. Everyday." I squeezed him and Matt patted him on his head.

"It's ok to cry here." Matt offered. "I have." Griffin turned around and hugged Matt at his waist.

"Can we go to the firehouse?" he asked as he pulled away.

"Sure, anything you want." I could see Matt was glad about this request. From what I had heard from Dawson, the Darden kids were having trouble coping, especially Griffin. He was older and could understand more what was happening. He hid his grief under all the anger, I could relate to that. But unfortunately, it was part of the process. We made our way back to the house and finished what little of shift there was left. We walked into the garage together and they went into the equipment room as I went to the common room.

"Where were you?" questioned Mills.

"Same place I'm always on this date." I smiled.

"You ok?"

"Yeah I'm good. I saw Matt there with Griffin Darden. He's a good kid."

"Yeah, it's been hard on him."

"What are your plans for tonight?" Just as he was about to answer, Griffin burst in front of me.

"Abbey, want to come over for supper tonight?" I knew they were living with Matt while their mom was in prison so I was somewhat caught like a deer in headlights.

"Griffin, maybe Abbey already has plans tonight." Matt said.

I recovered rather quickly from my initial shock.

"No I'm free. I'll bring the food."

"No it's ok, I can cover the food." Matt argued.

"It's my week to cook." I smiled. "Do you have a special request?" I asked Griffin.

"Lasagna." He said enthusiastically.

"Lasagna it is." I laughed.

"I'll head to the grocery store after shift and I'll meet you at your place?"

"Yeah that sounds good." He scribbled his address on a piece of paper and requested I give him my phone, which I did. "Here, now you have my cell number if you have any problems getting there."

"Thanks."

There was maybe an hour left to shift and I spent it playing cards with Griffin and Pete. Griffin was kicking our butts. Shift ended as we finished our hand and Griffin had the upper hand once again.

"Ok, shifts over. Let's go get Ben." Matt broke us up. "I should be there by the time you arrive."

"Cool. I'll go get the food. Do you eat bread with that?"

"Not me but the boys do."

"Noted, I'll see you later." I quickly got in my truck and headed to the store.

As promised, he was there when I got to his place. His truck was parked in front of the house. I quickly went up the stairs and knocked.

"Come in, the boys are doing their homework."

I walked past him to the two boys sitting at the dinner table doing their homework in silence.

"Hey boys."

"Hi." They said together without looking up from what they were doing.

"Wow, obedient kids." I chuckled.

"They know that if they don't do their homework there's no activities after supper."

"Nice work uncle Matt." I laughed louder this time removing what I needed from the bag.

"One of your dad's recipe?" he leaned against his counter.

"No, all mine."

"Do you want some wine or beer?"

"Wine please." I started putting the ingredients in a casserole to make the sauce. I took my glass dish out to do the lasagna in. He handed me my glass of wine and pored one for himself.

"So the Fire Academy?"

"Yeah, I go there every month usually when I'm not on shift but today marked one year so I had to go down there."

"Does it do you any good?"

"Not at first but now it does."

"I guess we're all the same."

"Took you a while too huh?"

"Yeah. At first I would tell myself that truck couldn't leave, Andy wasn't on it." He chuckled nervously.

"It's ok, for the longest time, when the front door of our house closed, I would expect my dad to walk through it." I finished draining the pasta. Keeping my fingers busy was good enough to keep my thoughts strait.

I started meticulously piling up the ingredients in the glass casserole. "The boys will be ok."

I started the oven while I finished the dish.

"I'm just happy Dawson was right about Griffin."

I put the lasagna in the oven. "Kids are easy that way. Plus, you're lucky he's only eleven. I can relate to that anger." I had a sudden pensive look.

"I think we all have to go through it."

"That's true, it is part of the process but unfortunately, we don't all deal with it the same way." I drank some more wine. I knew he didn't want to press me for that information but after being at the Fire Academy, I felt like I could tell him. I drummed my fingers against the counter and took my glass of wine and took a sip before resuming my story. "I think it was one of the most, if not darkest period of my life. If I wasn't crying, I was angry at everyone and everything."

"What changed?"

"I took the anger out." He looked at me with more questions than ever.

"The gym?"

"No. I told you how I loved working with my dad on cars. Fixing them was something that was usually giving me peace but one night, it was too much."

I pulled out my phone from my pocket and started looking through the pictures to find what I was looking for. "As of right now, Mills is the only one who knows about this." And I handed him the phone once I found the picture I was looking for.

"You did this?"

"Yes, with my tire wrench."

"Wow!" There wasn't much else to be said about it.

"Yeah, for a long time, I told myself that breaking things wouldn't bring him back, that being angry wouldn't help anyone."

"And did it help?"

On some level it did but Mills helped me out the most, even though he was grieving his own father. He helped pick up the pieces and put them back together." I smiled.

"He's a great friend. You know, he worries about you at the house."

"Yeah I know. But he knows I'm ok now, the reckless me is gone." I took another sip of wine.

"Over huh? And what would you call what happened on the bridge?"

"Me being me. I know everyone was angry but I would do it again if I had to." I took another sip of wine just as the oven dinged.

"Saved by the bell." He smiled.

"Guess so." I smiled back turning around towards the oven. I located the oven mitts rather quickly and pulled the lasagna out. "Ben, Griffin, the food is ready." Matt walked around his counter and pulled some plates out, the rest was already on the table. I filled in the guys three plates before I took the bread out and cut it, putting it in a basket and handing it over to Ben who wanted to help.

"Come sit down and eat." Matt smiled at me while I was fixing my plate.

"Almost done." The more I spent time with Matt, the more the feelings I have about him intensified. I took my plate and sat down with the three boys and just enjoyed myself. We talked about how school was with both Griffin and Ben. Although Griffin had opened up a little since I saw him at the Academy, Ben was much more talkative. He was two years younger than his brother and although I could see the pain in his eyes, his fathers' death didn't affect him on the same level as it did Griffin.

"You guys like the lasagna?" I asked.

"Yeah." Both boys said together.

"Maybe I can teach you guys how to make it some time." I took a sip of my wine.

"That could be fun." Matt said. "Abbey is a great cook." It made me blush a light shade of red.

"You're exaggerating." Both boys were already giggling at our banter. It didn't take long before everyone was done with their plates. I quickly got up and started collecting the dirty dishes.

"What do you think you're doing?

"Isn't it obvious?" I gave him a questioning look.

"Yes but you didn't come here to cook AND clean." He emphasized.

"No, but I figured you could use a break from taking care of EVERYTHING. You know with two boys running around."

"It's not that bad, they're good kids."

"Still. I'll make you a deal. You go check on the boys while I start doing the dishes and IF you're lucky and I'm not done with these, you can help dry them." I smiled knowing he would never be back before I was done.

Casey raised his arms in surrender. "You have yourself a deal." He smiled back. I chuckled as he turned around to check on the boys. I managed to find some plastic containers to store the rest of the lasagna. I figured it could make good lunches for the boys and placed them in the fridge and attacked the dirty dishes. I was concentrated on my task getting it done fast. I put everything in the dish rack and proceeded in drying them one by one. I placed everything on the counter and started trying to put them back in their respective place in the cupboards. I managed to put my things back in the bag just as Matt returned to the kitchen.

"Really?"

"I told you I would be done by the time you got back. I've always told you I was a woman of my word." I smiled.

"I should never doubt it again. You've proved me wrong three times already. Another glass?" he offered.

"Last one, if I want to be in any condition to drive tonight." We made our way to the living room and sat on the couch.

CASey's POV

I poured her a last glass of wine and took a beer for myself before heading to the living room. There was music coming from the stereo in the corner of the room. I was just loud enough to not disrupt a discussion between people. She sat on the couch and brought one leg up against herself while the other sat crossed leg on the couch. She was wearing an army green loose fitting t-shirt, style that she seemed to prefer with a pair of jeans. Her hair was up in the same bun that she sported every day on shift. She had been around the house for almost a month now and as I got to know her, Mills initial description of her was dead on. She was always smiling or laughing except for that very first day and earlier today at the Academy. She was very passionate about everything she did and you could see it in the way she worked on the ambo that she was meant to do just that. She was effortlessly beautiful without a stitch of make-up on, just the way I think all girls should be.

"So, how were your exams?"

She took a sip of wine, I could tell she was a little bit nervous. "I think I did ok." I think she was trying to downplay it just to be on the safe side.

"So when do you find out if you passed?"

"Well they're supposed to review our exams and go through the simulation notes tomorrow so I think I should get my results next week."

"And what about until then? What do you do now?"

"Well Boden told me that they accepted my request to stay at 51 until I get a new house assigned to me. Not that I want to leave 51 but there isn't any spot opened there so I don't really have any choice than to go somewhere else."

"I'm sure he'll do everything in his power to get you in a good house." I took a pull of my beer.

"51 has always been my family and even more now that I've been there as my own person, it will be sad to leave."

"We were lucky to have you." I would be sad to see her leave, she had become a good friend.

"Thanks."

"Do you have any preferences for a house?"

"Yes but I can't have it so no, anywhere they put me is fine just as long as it's not at the other side of Chicago."

"I guess we'll find out soon enough. Do you have any post graduation party plans?"

"Nothing no, just another day in the life of me." She took another sip of wine. I'd have to talk to Mills about that. I could sense that she was trying to lessen the importance of that day, probably due to the fact that her father was no longer there to celebrate it with her. I looked at my watch to make sure the boys weren't going to bed too late.

"It's time for the guys bed time, I'll be right back." I finished my beer and went up the stairs to the spare bedroom. Both boys were there, talking with their heads put together.

"What are you guys up to?" I eyed them suspiciously.

"Is Abbey your girlfriend?" Ben asked.

I was slightly taken aback by his question but recovered quickly. "No, she's just a really good friend." I sat down on the chair next to the bed. "Time for bed boys."

"I think you should ask her out." He added.

"Stop it Ben, I told you not to ask him about that." Griffin protested.

"Is that so." I questioned Ben playing into his game.

"Yeah, she's really pretty and she cooks great." He looked like a hopeful boy.

"Ok that's enough you two." I chuckled. "It's time for bed, are your teeth brushed?"

"Yes." They both said together.

"Alright then I'll see you in the morning."

"Ok, say good night to Abbey for us." Ben requested.

"Will do. Good night boys."

"Good night." They said together again. I turned around and turned off the light before going back down the stairs.

Abbey's POV

As Matt went up the stairs, I finished the last bit of wine in my glass and set it on the table in the living room. This had been a very nice evening but it wasn't helping the feelings I was starting to develop for him. Even on the first day, just the pull of those blue eyes had attracted me but I figured that a nice, good-looking guy like him was already taken. Then the nice didn't go away and I found out there was no one in his life but I pushed that all away thinking that he would never go for a girl like me. I was pulled out of my thoughts by footsteps coming down the stairs.

"The boys are off to bed, they say good night."

"That's sweet. I was thinking I had to go too." I smiled getting up from the couch

"Already? Were off tomorrow." He tried hopefully.

"Correction, you're off tomorrow. I promised my mom I'd help open the diner with her so Mills can take an extra day off. He's been working like crazy both at the house and at the diner on top of all his squad classes. I know he has one final test to study for, and from how he's been talking about it, it's really hard."

"That's really nice of you."

"Best friend duties." I shrugged.

"Most important ones." He said as I turned around towards the door.

"Thanks again for the wine and the food." I smiled putting my shoes on.

"You're welcome for the wine but you did all the food so thanks. I know the boys liked it, they don't usually eat two plates."

"That's what you get with two growing tweens." I smiled. "I'll see you on shift on Monday."

"Yeah, drive safe and good night."

"Will do. Good night." I went down the steps and I could feel his eyes on me until I was safely in my car before I saw him close the door. I drove back to my house completely deep in thought. I didn't even notice the road back and when I got in the house, Mills was sitting at the table with his head in the books.

"Hey how was supper?" He turned around at the sound of the door.

"It was fun, the boys are great."

"That's nice. Thanks again for tomorrow, I really need to pass this exam so I can make squad."

"It's my pleasure. I'll see you tomorrow, I'm going to go to bed so I wont be a complete mess tomorrow at the diner. Have fun with those books."

"Thanks a bunch." He laughed as I made my way up the stairs. I did my nightly routine, set my alarm and crashed from exhaustion.

a/n: I hope you liked this chapter and I always appreciate the reviews.