Chapter 21: Welcome to the Museum of Broken Furniture

Anubis recovered quickly with the moonlight lamp. He stayed awake and alert for the rest of our stay. He had some more visitors but not as many as the day his life was in danger. There were also some gods coming to get injuries of their own healed. They would come to visit Anubis just for a chance to bask in the moonlight. The moons absent was really taking a toll on the gods that draw energy from it. I had already promised Imhotep he could keep the moonlight when we leave.

I didn't stick around with Anubis while he recovered. He was reluctant to talk to me and it was awkward being around him. I took some time to look around the city but mostly I wandered around bored. Horus had left to check on how the search for Set was going. There weren't many other gods I knew or felt comfortable with. All I had was Paws to keep me company, but even he seemed torn between spending time between the two of us. As soon as we came back to the hospital from a long walk he would run inside straight to Anubis' room. I would wander around the hospital finding something to do while trying to stay out of the nurse's way.

I was glad when Imhotep announced Anubis well enough to leave. It was a nice change of pace to board our boat again in order to get some clothes for Anubis to change into. Sometimes I would get cabin fever being here too long. But after being away for a while coming back felt like returning home.

As I walked to Anubis' hospital room I ran into an unexpected guest. "Horus, what are you doing back?"

Little Horus turned to greet me. "Hey Nakia! Heard you guys are setting off."

"Yeah, Imhotep is just getting together some things for us and then we'll be on our way. How's your search going?"

"Wadjet's completely on it. She's got some leads she's chasing with Uncle Horus. And since they've got things covered I thought I'd tag along with you two for a while."

"Really?" I said off guard. "Why's that?"

"For extra assurance, in case Set tries to target you two again. Just think of me as a bodyguard. I'd also like to see if you guys are taking good care of my boat."

"Don't worry about that. We keep on top of our chores, though there might be dog toys scattered across the floo," I added with a laugh. "Are you sure, though? It's not that exciting most of the time. You might get bored."

"After everything going on I could use a break." Horus gave me a thump on the shoulder. "And y'know, I think it could be fun. All of us hanging out, seeing the sights. How 'bout it?"

I smiled, suddenly feeling like there was something to look forward to. "Yeah, I think that would be really nice."

"That's not the plan we agreed on!"

"But it's better to use this as a chance to cover more ground while we're here!"

"That'll just making everything more complicated! There are a whole group of islands we can't go to without going east! It's better to wait until we get the larger land masses so we can get the islands all at once!"

"It's a waste to not use this opportunity! What's the point of coming here if we don't take advantage of it?!"

"I don't know?! Saving your fucking life?!"

"Yes, and you nearly starved Paws and yourself doing that! What a good plan! You are not so great at those, are you?!"

"It's not my fault you pissed off that god Dumatu or whatever the hell his name is!"

"I did nothing against Duamutef! He decided on his own to be a hinderance!"

"Great Ra above, could you two please stop yelling…"

"Shut up!" Anubis and I shouted at Horus in unison.

We hadn't left the hospital parking lot yet and already Anubis' anger was starting to cause problems. We couldn't agree on which course to take. Anubis wanted to go south and go over Taiwan and some of the Indonesian islands. I wanted to follow the path I made from the beginning so I wouldn't have to rework our route. I made this plan to be more efficient but Anubis didn't get that.

I jabbed a finger at Anubis. "I already had a solid plan for us! You just want to do this cause there's no work for you! Meanwhile I have to readjust all the plans I made!"

"It'll still be worth it for all of us! If we can't be adaptable then we're just going to run into more problems in the future!"

Horus looked fed up, holding out his hands to both of us, "Alright, stop it you two! Just simmer down for a sec. We need to work out the pros and cons of your ideas and figure out which one works best."

"I have already explained myself," Anubis yelled.

I folded my arms. "Me too."

Horus pinched the bridge of his nose. "No, you two are yelling at each other without listening. We aren't ever going to reach an agreement if you two can't act more objective."

"Don't tell me how to act!" Anubis slammed his fist into the table making a terrible cracking sound. He removed his hand revealing splintered wood and a crack running across where he punched his hand.

Horus pointed to the table and stated simply, "You're buying a new table."

"Fine! I'm done!" He stormed out of the bridge slamming the door behind him.

I groaned in frustration, dragging a chair nearby across the floor to throw myself in. "Augh! He's just so… augh! Why is he so oblivious? It's maddening!"

"You didn't have much tact yourself…" Horus softly spoke as he assessed the damage to his table.

"I just explained what was best since I understand this better. It's not my fault he went off the deep end."

"No, you were baiting him. And don't even start," Horus raised his voice as I opened my mouth to protest. "Don't bait me into a fight. I have spent too many years in diplomacy to fall for that. Take some deep breaths and think about what you want to say before speaking."

I was simmering, but I crossed my arms and kept quiet. Horus continued staring at the map on the table focusing on the areas Anubis wanted to travel. After some silence he asked, "Why did you put off doing the islands later? Couldn't you just zig zag the entire globe and be done?"

With a huff I explained, "70% of the Earth is water. There isn't much of a point spending months traveling over the ocean when there will be nothing to find. It's more efficient to hop from island to island, but I needed time to research where all those islands are. The smallest islands are unmarked on maps."

"So you were trying to cut out as much dead space without missing anything?"

"Yeah…" I shrugged. "And I admit it's not perfect. I'm sure someone could make a better route that didn't require going around the planet twice. I just wanted to be sure we wouldn't miss anything or waste our time."

"Okay, so why would Anubis' plan be a problem?" Horus asked looking back up to me.

"I would have to rework our route for the second trip. And I'm not completely confident I've mapped all the islands in that area. That region has a lot of tiny island clusters. If a jar is on one of them we might overlook it."

Horus smiled. "See? That was a lot more reasonable than shouting. I think as long as you and Paws are the ones deciding on the navigation, it should be up to you what route to take. If Anubis wants to decide he should take the task on himself."

"Yeah, well, good luck convincing him. We'll probably be sitting in this parking lot for another day or so at this rate."

Horus laughed, "No, I don't think it'll be much of an issue. Anubis will come back soon and we can decide on something."

"Can't wait," I scoffed. I rested my forehead on the edge of the table and reached a hand to pet Paws. At least he had it easy. I wish I could hide under a table and wait for all of this to be over.

Horus was right about Anubis not taking long. Only a few minutes passed before Anubis cracked the door open.

"Paws," he called out. Paws perked his ears from under the table. "Take us west to Mt. Everest. I want to get moving." The door clicked shut again. My mouth hung open a bit shocked, but Horus seemed pleased, if not a tad bit smug.

"Told ya," he said.

"But why would he side with me? He was mad at me five minutes ago."

"Because he wasn't mad at you or your idea, unlike you who just wanted to win an argument. He was angry at the situation you guys got into. He wanted to turn it into something positive but changed his mind after cooling down."

"...You make it sound like the fight was my fault."

"No, it was both your faults."

"Gee, thanks," I said with sarcasm. The ship gave a light shake as Paws got us up in the air. I felt like all my energy had been zapped out of me, and Horus didn't help me feel any better. I was still a bit angry, but I mostly felt ashamed. I probably was thinking more about myself than Anubis. I just hated feeling like I was being pushed around so I started to defend myself. Looking back I felt embarrassed with how quickly I rose to the attack.

I buried my head into my knees with a groan. "Do you think Anubis is going to attack me for being stupid like everyone else has said?"

"I don't think so. It takes a lot to really make him mad. Trust me, I know. I've been testing his limits for as long as I can remember. It was a bit unusual, though," Horus said with a sigh. "He normally doesn't get into fights so easily."

"He's always really sensitive when he gets a new emotion. I don't think I can handle him getting mad at every little thing…"

"Don't you worry!" Horus beamed, standing tall pointing to himself in pride. "Nothing bad will happen while I'm here."

I tried to smile back but it felt unconvincing. "That's what you're here for. Right, Mr. Bodyguard."

"It's Set that I'm protecting you from…"

"You don't have to pretend," I said getting up from my seat. "I knew when you said you were coming with us that you were worried. It's probably best that you're here. I'm not a people person like you." I stretched my arms as I headed out of the room. "I'm going to my room. I need some time alone."

"Okay," Horus said before I closed the door behind me.

There wasn't as much fighting as I had worried about, but Anubis did seem to be struggling with his anger. There were small incidents now and then that caused us some concern. The earliest that happened was when Horus and I were doing dishes together. Horus can be such a goofball. He had me cracking up at some of the ridiculous stories he was telling me. But our fun stopped when we heard the sound of breaking glass outside the kitchen. We went out to investigate and found a picture frame had been broken, but there was no one in sight. Later that evening I saw Anubis with a bandage around his hand. I didn't say anything to him.

It started to become a normal occurrence to find something was suddenly broken. The strangest thing I found was a chair that had gotten stuck in the railing along the side of the boat's deck. Although I was glad Anubis was taking out his anger out on objects rather than us, Horus was beginning to bemoan the slow destruction of his boat.

"Nakia, what will we do when there isn't anything left that isn't broken?" Horus whined to me one day.

"Just replace it. You're rich. We can just stop somewhere to get new furniture."

"But I like the stuff I haaaave..." Horus had a huge pout on his face. It was hard to take him so seriously when he looked so ridiculous.

"I'm sure you'll like your new stuff too," I said with a pat to his shoulder. He didn't seem convinced, but I had to leave before I started laughing. I didn't want to make him feel worse.

It was hard for me to get a grasp of this new Anubis. He was still trying to avoid me, but that was much harder to do when confined to a boat together. Sometimes I wasn't sure if he was avoiding me because he was mad at me or he was worried he would get mad. I let him keep his distance. I was also worried I may not keep myself in check and start a fight again.

I didn't get to talk to him properly until we had started a new course to India. We were finally on track and I had to keep my senses sharp in case we came over a canopic jar. I entered our living area from being outside on the deck and found Anubis slouched on the couch. He was spaced out, his brows slightly furrowed. I wasn't sure if I should approach him since Horus wasn't around, but I thought it would be rude to not say anything. I walked to the couch and sat next to him, allowing some room between us.

"Are you okay, Anubis?"

Anubis paused before responding, "...I think I might be sick."

"Is your wound not healing?" I asked suddenly worried.

"No, that has already healed. I do not feel well. My chest is always burning. I can't make it go away."

"That's just how anger feels. That or you have heartburn," I said with a shrug.

"I hate feeling this way…" He pulled his arms tighter around himself. He kept staring at the floor. I had no idea what he was thinking about.

"Well, sometimes when people are upset or angry it helps to talk about it. Like the time you felt guilt for the first time and were upset. After you talked about it you seemed to be doing a lot better."

Anubis didn't say anything for a long time. I guessed he didn't want to talk to me about it. I thought about getting Horus to come here when he finally spoke. "I have been trying to figure out what is making me feel so angry but I am not sure. I thought at first it could have been Set, and I am mad at him. But I'm not this angry at him. There is something else but I do not know what it is."

"I'm not really a therapist, but whenever I'm mad I usually picture myself punching the thing I'm mad at to make me feel better. Is there anything in particular your anger makes you want to punch. Other than our furniture…"

Anubis closed his eyes, scrunching his eyes in concentration. He eventually relaxed and went back to staring in the distance. "Myself," he said with a look of melancholy.

"Why are you mad at yourself?"

"I do not know. I keep telling myself there are other people that I should be mad at, but it keeps turning back to me. There is something more to it, but the pieces are missing. And that only frustrates me more."

"Usually when someone is mad at themselves, it's because they hate themselves for some reason. Do you feel like there is something about yourself that you hate?"

His expression slipped. His face went slack and eyes were glassy. I sighed, "You still can't hate. That might be the problem. For some reason I thought you would be able to now, but I guess anger isn't always about hate. You can be angry at people you love to."

"I wouldn't know anything about that," Anubis said still looking away with unfocused eyes.

"It's okay," I said with a smile. "I don't know why you feel this way, but I hope you can forgive yourself. I don't think it's healthy to hold on to your anger. Even if you want to know where it's coming from, it's better to try and let it go for now. You may understand it better after more of your heart is complete."

"... yeah. Okay." He sank further into his seat pulling his knees up. I scooted closer to him letting him rest some of his weight on me. We stayed like that for a while, letting the silence calm us.

I had hoped our conversation would have helped him with his outbursts, but it didn't seem to do much. The next morning I heard a crash and rushed into the living room. The glass cabinet that had held an array of glassware from around the world was now flipped over. There was glass shards scattered all across the floor.

Anubis stood next to the broken cabinet, back hunched. He turned his glare at me and shouted, "What the hell are you looking at?! Get the fuck out of here!"

I started to shake. I could feel the corners of my eyes burning. I knew I should leave, but I couldn't make my body move. "Anubis, calm-"

"What did I just tell you?!" He stomped over the glass coming towards me. I took a step back, feeling terrified. From behind me Horus suddenly rushed out. He crashed into Anubis, pushing him into the wall. Anubis kicked and snarled. Horus kept steady having the upper hand over him.

"Get a hold of yourself!" Horus yelled.

"Let go!"

"Not until you relax!"

"Get off!"

My back hit the wall and I sank to the floor. Anubis kept struggling but slowly he fought less and less. Eventually he was still but Horus didn't take any chances. He held him in place against the wall.

"Are you done?" Horus asked sternly.

"...give me a minute." Anubis let Horus hold him there for a while longer. He took some deep breathes before saying, "Okay, I'm done." Horus released him. Anubis immediately left out the door without looking at us.

"Dammit Anubis…" Horus swore. He kicked at the broken glass. I gripped at the wall trying to stand. My knees were shaking so it was hard to keep steady. Horus heard some of the glass break under my feet and remembered I was here. He quickly rushed to me helping me get up.

"You're not hurt, are you?"

"No, I'm fine. I… can't stop shaking."

"I'll help you to your room."

"The glass…" I began to argue.

"I'll handle it. Watch your feet."

Horus helped me down the stairs and left me on my bed. I wish he could have stayed, but he rushed out before I could say anything. I laid down trying to calm my heartbeat.

I stayed in my room for a couple of hours. I didn't feel safe leaving until I heard Anubis walk down the hall to his own room. I waited a few minutes after hearing his door click shut before I left. I climbed the stairs and went back into the living room.

The mess had been cleaned up. The cabinet was upright again but it was obviously broken. One side of it had completely collapsed and sagged to the ground. There were garbage bags and a broom set beside it. I wasn't sure I would walk around in here without shoes until I could vacuum every inch of the floor.

Horus was sprawled out on the couch, his arm resting on his forehead. I walked to him and noticed he was completely asleep. He had a blanket covering him. By how neatly it was spread out on him I had a feeling Anubis had put it there. I sat at the edge of the coffee table next to him.

"How do you put up with him, Horus…" My voice didn't stir him. He was deeply asleep. My stare turned glassy. Anubis had looked so wild. For a moment I was glad Horus was so level headed, but then I remembered Horus had once done much worse in his anger. I had nearly forgotten the memory Amun had showed me of Horus fighting Anubis. Amun had been trying to prove his point that people aren't always the way they appear. They seemed like close brothers, but even they had an ugly past.

"I never did ask him about that," I said to myself. "I guess it is kind of impossible to ask about. I shouldn't know about it in the first place." I watched Horus' peaceful face not really focusing on anything at all. Horus had felt so angry with Anubis back then I wondered how he resolved their animosity. Perhaps if I knew it would give me an idea on how to help Anubis with his current anger.

"You can do it too, you know." Amun's voice echoed in that pure white hospital room. "Your eyes have been closed all this time, have they not? It's time you open them."

"It's not right for me to look," I said out loud but even I couldn't hear any conviction in my own voice. I was burning with curiosity. It wouldn't be right, but it might help. Or was I making excuses. There was a boundary here. One I shouldn't cross. My foot was in the air ready to take a step over it.

I stood up and started rubbing hard on my lips. The lips was the part of the body with the thinnest layer of skin. That's why they were red. It's the blood underneath. Blood on blood contact is the easiest way to perform magic, especially the kind that allows you into someone's memories. Were you planning this all along, Amun?

"I swear to god, if you wake up I'm going to be completely screwed." It was my last moment of hesitation, my last turning point. I could stop now. My body wanted me to pull back and walk away.

I bent down and gave Horus' lips a kiss.

It worked in an instant. I had somehow remembered the feeling of this magic and let myself be pulled into it. But it wasn't the same. I was in complete control and I had no idea what I was doing. I was stuck in a kaleidoscope of memories. They rushed all around me, sometimes passing through me. It was hard to remember who I was as I felt torn between being two people. I stopped staring into the endless chaos of thoughts. I pulled into myself, trying to piece words together.

'I want to know… Anubis… how you… anger… how you stopped your anger... of Anubis…'

I opened my eyes and saw the multitude of memories begin to thin out. Among them rose a singular memory. I reached out embracing the person I was in it.

Before me blossomed an oasis in the midst of the desert. Such a thing I knew had become a rare beauty in these times. I would change this of course. Set wasn't in control anymore. This chaos that reached from the death gripping sand into the lives of helpless mortals would be pushed back. More oases like these would prosper again as they did before. It was my destiny as the king of Egypt.

That was why it was so foreboding to find death in a place growing with newfound life. I hid behind the brush to watch from afar. I watched as he dragged the body out of the water. A drowning most likely. In a desert water is equal to life, but not for this human. I saw the boy move a hand over his body whispering words I couldn't hear.

The corpse moved. The mouth opened and from it burst forth a glowing white bird. It fluttered its wings in panic. It was a new life for it. It didn't know how to fly. The boy caught it in his hands, pinning the wings down. He ran a thumb slowly across its head. The soul slowly stopped resisting its captor. It rested on the boy's arm no longer trying to escape.

I wondered why I came here. I don't want to talk to him. I didn't want to see him snuff out the lives I was supposed to protect. The war was over. We won. I had nothing to gain from him now when I had everything that was meant to be mine.

I moved to leave and made an ametuer mistake. I took a step without looking and happened to step on the tail of a sand rat. It squealed and hurried away, shaking the brush in its wake. I panicked, whipping my head around hoping that by some miracle he hadn't heard. But he had ears as sharp as a jackal. He stood looking in my direction, the glowing white soul still nested on his arm. There was no sneaking away now, not without looking like a fool.

I brushed past the bushes and flora. When I reached the outer edges of the small lake my sandals sank slightly into the sand. The ground was as reluctant to let me move as my heart was. Anpu watched me approaching, eyes wide and bewildered.

"Hello pharaoh," he greeted me. It was the first time hearing him address me with my new title, but I never did bother to speak to him much during or after the war. Before he always called me Horus the Child. His formality was grating. "I was not expecting to see you so far from Thinis."

"I'm just evaluating the conditions in other parts of Egypt," I lied.

"Is that so?" He lifted his arm sending the soul away. It flew with confidence until it disappeared into the duat. Anpu pulled a cloth from his robes to dry his hands. His clothing was very informal. It was something you would expect on a slave or the poor except he at least kept his clothes clean. The only thing extravagant on him was a belt fashioned from a rainbow of colors that he tied around his waist. It wasn't even fastened with gold but a plain metal hook. Just with his appearance his status couldn't measure up with the gold bangles, beaded collar and tall crown I wore. Humans would laugh to think we were both gods.

"There isn't much to find here," Anpu continued. "This place is doing really well. Other parts have not been so fortunate. There is an illness spreading in Edfu that has claimed many lives. Many cities in Middle Egypt are also still struggling with famine. They have not had a good harvest yet. Directing food supplies to that area would bring them some relief."

"I'll be sure to visit those areas."

"Very well. I hope I was some help to you, pharaoh."

He turned to leave but I quickly shouted to his back, "Why did you give Osiris your throne, Anpu?"

Anpu stopped and turned to me. He looked uncomfortable but still answered me. "Osiris was the king of Egypt. He will make a good king to the duat."

"But you didn't have to give him your place as ruler."

Anpu shrugged. "I never wanted the throne."

"Liar!" I snarled at him. I stomped toward him. The sand pulled at my feet with each step but nothing was going to stop me from getting to him. "That's not something that you just give away to someone!"

"Why not?"

"Why not?! That throne was your birthright! You have the blood of a ruler! You were destined to rule the duat! It doesn't matter if you hand your responsibilities to someone else. It will always be yours," I said jabbing my finger into his chest. I stood directly in front of him but he wouldn't look at me as I spoke.

"I'm tired of it. Everyone praises you for your sacrifice, and yet your being here is how this mess started in the first place."

"I did not do anything-"

"You didn't have to do anything," I said over him. "You just had to be born. Set killed dad to get revenge because Nephthys gave birth to you. And look at you now. Everyone loves you. So loyal. So selfless. You don't lift a finger to fight against Set but you have everyone convinced you're some hero."

Anpu still wouldn't look at me, but his mouth pulled into a scowl. It was satisfying to see some fire in his eyes, much more satisfying than cutting his body to pieces as he refused to fight back. I smiled to myself.

"What's your real game, Anpu? You've only served yourself through this war. What will you do now? Are you going to pull the rug under my father and get your power back? Or are you going to hide and do nothing like you always do? Just sit back and be worthless while everyone fawns over-"

Something grabbed at my foot and pulled me from behind. I felt myself fall to my back but I was quick to react. I grabbed my scimitar and slashed at what took hold of me. My weapon cut through sand and nothing else. I caught myself before hitting the ground. I looked at my ankle but there was nothing there but a shadow as black as onyx. My sheut did this?

I tried to pull myself into a balanced stance but I had no way to counter the shadow that was now grabbing at my arms. Anpu appeared at my front and kicked downward on my restrained arm. I cried out, my scimitar falling through my fingers. Anpu was quick to grab it in his own grasp. His face was red with fury as he slashed at me. He pushed the tip of the weapon's edge into my shoulder. I shouted and tried to fend him off me but I was completely powerless. I had never been attacked using sheut before. I didn't know how to free myself from them.

We fell into the damp sand, Anpu on top of me still digging the scimitar into my chest. I had won so many battles that I always felt confident in my own skills. It had been a long time since I'd felt real terror for myself. Despite his advantage, Anpu didn't attack anymore than keeping me pinned down. His hair hung down barely disguising the look of rage he glared at me with.

"I have had it with your attitude! You are ignorant to think I would never rise to help the people I love! It is all I have ever done! I served and worked with Osiris for all the years he ruled! When he was killed, I helped to search every inch of Egypt to find his remains! I performed the open mouth ceremony that saved his soul from suffering!

"No, I couldn't save his life, but I gave him the best life that was possible for him! I gave him my throne because I knew he would go stir crazy being stuck in the duat without a kingdom to look after! You say I don't do anything?! I have done everything I can to keep your family alive and prosperous and I will continue to do so for as long as I live!"

Anpu shouted. I expected to be hit with another wave of pain, but instead he took the scimitar and chucked it into the oasis. He pushed himself off my body. I could feel myself be released but I couldn't bring myself to get up. My heart was pounding. Through the years I've had a lot of people shout at me, in combat or outside. I could take whatever words they threw at me. However, having someone who was normally silent come at you with words so forceful they made your bones tremble was a new level of intensity.

"RAAAHH!" I jumped up when I heard the shout, my battle instincts preparing me to fight. Anpu wasn't near me, though. He had a handful of rocks he was chucking into the water. He kept picking them up and casting them out, some of them skipping the water's edge and landing on the other shore but most of them sank. He kept throwing and throwing until eventually he exhausted himself. His shoulders slumped and the remaining rocks spilled from his hand.

I watched his outburst in stunned silence. He turned back to me and my muscles tensed. Most of his anger had faded. Now he looked at me with irritation and… guilt? I may have been over reading his expression.

"Horus," he called to me. I was surprised he was dropping the formality. Was he going to treat me with disrespect now? "I hope for your sake you became pharaoh because it is what you want, not because it was what you were told to be."

He didn't turn to leave this time. Instead his form turned into sand darker than the sand on the wet shore. The sand collapsed and fell. There was nothing but a black mound where Anpu once stood.

With him gone, I assessed my injury. It wasn't as bad as it could have been. It would be easy to fix. I got to my feet and picked up the crown that had fallen to the ground. I looked out at the water's smooth surface. "That asshole lost my favorite weapon…"

I should be angry but I couldn't muster the energy. Instead his final words buzzed in my ears. Why did I become pharaoh? I never thought of my role as being a choice but now I wasn't sure how I felt about being a ruler. It never occurred to me to wonder about such a thing.

"This is the life I always wanted… right?" I waited but the world gave no reply.

It was like holding your breathe and finally gasping for air. I pulled out of the memory like breaking the water's surface. I was back in reality, my body crouched over Horus' sleeping form. He didn't stir at all. I wasn't sure how much time had passed in reality. In a panic I swept my eyes over the entire room but no one else witnessed what I had done. I sighed with relief.

I backed away from Horus afraid of waking him. I went back downstairs to my room to think about what I experienced.

Author's Notes on my profile~