"Why did you pick this movie, again?" Belle asked her friend, and holding a copy of The Full Monty with her fingertips like it might be a little bit contagious. "Is this porn?"
"No, it's not porn," Ruby scolded, snatching her DVD back and popping it into the player. "It's a comedy. And I picked it out because it's a classic. Anyway, apparently you like Scottish guys now."
"I do not!" Belle snapped just a little bit faster than she had meant to and Ruby got a look on her face that Belle knew meant her friend hadn't believed a word of it. "Anyway, it's been too long since we got together. Let's talk about what's going on with you."
"Ugh," Ruby groaned dismissively. "Let's not talk about me. It's all been work and it's been miserable."
"That bad?"
"It's not all babies getting placed with their future mothers," Ruby reminded her. "A lot of it is really awful things. Bae got really lucky."
Ruby was right, of course. Belle didn't like thinking about how lucky Bae really had gotten, because thinking about that led to thinking about how easily he could have been one of the many, many kids that weren't lucky – the ones Ruby spent her days trying to rescue and her nights worrying about. The fact that Bae hadn't slipped into those cracks was a miracle of timing, a one in a million chance. If Milah had waited another eight hours, or even given him up a few hours earlier, he'd be God-knows-where now. She'd have missed out on the best thing that had ever happened to her, and also on his father.
"So what do you want to talk about?" Belle finally said, dropping down onto the sofa and picking up the bag of popcorn that they'd made earlier. "Sports? The weather?"
"I was pretty happy with your love life," Ruby replied, sitting down next to Belle and grabbing a glass of wine off the end table. "Come on, I haven't been on a date in months. At least let me live vicariously."
"There's nothing to tell," Belle insisted, picking up her own glass.
"Uhh, I'm sorry," Ruby scolded. "I didn't realize that going out with your college boyfriend until he dumps you because you're in love with someone else who clearly has feelings for you counted as 'nothing.' Gee, my nothing isn't nearly that interesting."
"He didn't dump me," Belle replied. "Being dumped implies that he was my boyfriend, and he wasn't. We weren't sleeping together or anything."
"Sure you weren't," Ruby said flippantly.
"We weren't!" Belle insisted. "Not since college, anyway. We only went out for like, three weeks this time. That's not long enough."
"Wait, really?" Ruby replied, pausing the film in the middle of some kind of steel girder heist. "You didn't do anything?"
"Just watch the movie," Belle snapped, grabbing for the remote and unpausing the film.
"I'm sorry," Ruby said after a few minutes. "I know it's not really my business or anything."
"No," Belle huffed. "It's really not."
"But I am your best friend," Ruby continued. "If you're gonna talk about it with someone it might as well be me."
Belle glared, but Ruby just gave her most innocent smile. Damned if she wasn't right, too. Belle had no freaking clue what the hell to do, but maybe Ruby might. Ruby had done her fair share of dating in school, anyway; and she'd never been completely terrified of dating a man she actually liked. Maybe some perspective might be good here.
"George thinks I'm in love with Arthur," Belle finally said with a sigh. "That's why he ended things."
Ruby shrieked a little bit and Belle grimaced.
"I'm sorry," Ruby replied, trying to calm down some. "I just...I've never heard you say the words 'I'm in love' before."
"Stop putting words in my mouth," Belle said. "You know what I meant."
"I do and I don't care," Ruby said with a giggle. "I just mean those words have never actually passed your lips in that order. Anyway, are you in love with him?"
"No," Belle replied on instinct. "Well, I don't know."
"How do you not know?"
"I mean I don't know," she said honestly. "It's complicated, anyway."
She turned back to the screen, just in time to catch that something was going on between Gaz and his son – the accents in this movie were really just too thick. She was used to Arthur's accent, blunted by years of living in the US, these ones were heavier and as much as she liked them she found them nearly unintelligible.
"How complicated can it be?" Ruby sounded entirely reasonable and Belle hated it. "Does he like you?"
"I think so," Belle admitted. She could deny a lot of things, but she didn't think that was really one of them anymore. "I mean, I don't have a lot of experience with that kind of thing, but I think he does like me."
"And you like him?"
Belle chewed on her lip a little. She'd never really admitted this out loud, she realized. She'd agreed with George, but she'd never actually said it out loud. Ever.
"I do," she finally said. "I really, actually do like him."
"And does he know this?"
"Not a clue," she sighed, curling up on the sofa a little. "It's never come up."
"So tell him," Ruby said entirely reasonably. "Just sit him down and say, 'hey, I like you' and then kiss him. And then maybe take his pants off."
"Ruby!" Belle shrieked.
"What?" her friend said defensively. "How is my idea any worse than your current plan of not telling him?"
"Because it's not that simple," Belle huffed.
"How is it not that simple?"
"What would we tell Bae?"
"Are you serious?" Ruby blurted out. "You're worried about Bae? Really? Belle, do you have any idea how many of my kids would be thrilled to be in this situation? Hell, do you know how thrilled I would be if any of the others had the problem that their mom and their dad actually liked each other? No, they just have the parents who throw things and can't afford to buy food."
"That doesn't mean this isn't a real problem," Belle replied. "Just because other people have it worse."
"I know," Ruby said. "I just mean that on the grand scale of problems, this one is a good problem to have."
"But what happens if things don't work out?" Belle asked earnestly. "We'd get his hopes up and then dash them. What if we can't stand to be around each other or if things get awkward?"
"You literally just described every child of divorced parents ever," Ruby pointed out. "It's not the end of the world if you guys broke up. You already have a custody agreement in effect, you know. And there's nothing that says if you did break up you have to hate each other, anyway."
"Nobody really stays friends," Belle replied. "They all just say that."
"You can stay friends," Ruby shot back. "It's a different kind of relationship and you have to have different boundaries, but I'm friends with every guy I ever broke up with."
"You're friends with them on Facebook," Belle said with a grimace. "That's not really the same thing as having a child together."
"I've been friends with them in person, too," Ruby insisted. "But the last few years I haven't had a lot of free time is all. And whatever free time I do have I'm not spending with guys I've already had sex with."
Belle felt herself flushing a little bit at the turn of the conversation, and glanced back to the television just in time to see Gaz begin to take his shirt off.
"Is he stripping?" she gasped.
"I told you it wasn't porn," Ruby said with a giggle, turning the volume up a touch so that she could hear "You Sexy Thing" playing along with the dancing.
"I can't believe I let you talk me into this," Belle replied teasingly as Ruby leaned over and put her head on her friend's shoulder.
"You love when I talk you into things," Ruby replied. "You'd have had way less fun in college if you didn't."
Belle smiled and put an arm around her friend. Ruby was right, of course. The two were unlikely friends, but they had been inseparable throughout college and when Belle looked back on her fondest memories of that time, a lot of them had started with letting Ruby talk her into something she didn't want to do at first. The two watched the film in silence for a little bit, giggling together at all the appropriate parts.
"I think I should meet Arthur sometime," Ruby mumbled towards the end. "Make sure he's good enough for you and Bae before this goes too far."
"You may be a bit late on that," Belle said softly. "He's already pretty well lodged in our lives."
"Yeah, I know," her friend replied. "But still. If you're thinking of maybe being more, then I think I should scope him out a little. I do have a vested interest in you two, you know."
"You'll meet him at Thanksgiving."
"Not sooner?"
"With your work schedule?" Belle replied with a laugh. "But he'll be at Thanksgiving."
"What are you going to do in the meantime?"
"Pretend like I don't like him?"
"Are you asking me or telling me?" Ruby said, looking up at her. "And do you think that would even work?"
"Not really," Belle replied. "But it's worked for him so far, I guess."
"Has it really, though?"
"Has it what?"
"Been working for him," Ruby replied. "Like, do you think he's happy?"
Belle didn't have an answer for that, which surprised her. She'd seen Arthur nearly every day for months now and spent weeks at a time living with him. It hadn't even occurred to her that he might not be happy. He'd always just been there, and she'd thought he had to have been happy because Bae was there and he'd wanted his son for so long. But, Belle realized, she wasn't happy like this. How long had he been in the same situation she was in now, wanting and not wanting at the same time? The fear and the hope making such an awful contrast she just wanted to explode.
"I don't know," Belle finally said. "I hope he is."
"What are you honestly afraid of?" Ruby asked her so sincerely that Belle couldn't even be annoyed at the intrusion.
"I'm afraid that it'll hurt Bae," Belle said. "He's happy right now, and if we were to end things then it could change his relationship with his father – or with me."
"You know he'll never not love you," Ruby replied. "Or Arthur. That kid has more room in his heart than he has family members. You and I both know that wouldn't be a problem."
Ruby was right, of course. Belle hated to admit it, but Ruby frequently was right. Bae would never love his dad less, no matter what happened. No, if she could be honest with anyone it was Ruby.
"I'm afraid it will go badly," Belle said. "But I'm also afraid of it going well, too."
"Why?"
"Because…" Belle was struggling to put it into words, exactly. "Look, you know me. I was a virgin when I met George and there hasn't been anyone else since him. I'm not good at this kind of thing. At all. And it's so much more important now because I actually like him. What if I let things go badly? Or worse, what if it starts out really good and then I just let it all go to hell? I don't want Bae thinking that's what a relationship is supposed to look like – two people just sort of...making do."
"You know," Ruby said, poking Belle in the stomach. "There are two people in a relationship. It doesn't fall all on you to make it work. And anyway, you can't live your entire life afraid of this. Do you want to be alone the rest of your life?"
"No," Belle admitted reluctantly.
"Then you need to just pin him down and take his pants off," Ruby said triumphantly. "And also tell him you love him."
"I never said I love him!"
"We wouldn't be having this conversation if you didn't," Ruby replied. "If he was just a guy you thought was cute you wouldn't be worried about this."
Dammit. Ruby was too smart for Belle's comfort sometimes.
"I just don't know what to do," Belle admitted after a while. "I've never had to tell a guy I like him before."
"Oh honey," Ruby said, a long suffering ache to her voice. "We have got to get you up to speed with middle school, don't we?"
"That's not funny," Belle said in a huff.
"Want me to ask him if he likes you?" Ruby teased. "Oh or you can write a letter with check boxes for 'yes' and 'no' so he can just check one off if he likes you!"
Belle started giggling in spite of herself and poked Ruby under her arm where she knew her friend was ticklish. Ruby squealed and pulled away as Belle pursued.
"Better idea!" Ruby exclaimed, giggling hard. "Why don't you write him an anonymous note and leave it in his locker? Or a candygram on Valentine's day!"
"Ruby!" Belle laughed at her friend. "This isn't funny!"
"Then why are you laughing?"
"Oh shut up!" Belle giggled, collapsing onto the sofa breathless from laughter as Ruby slithered to the floor. "What did I do to deserve this?"
"Had the best friend in the world?" Ruby said innocently. "And also somehow survived high school with no idea how to approach boys. Did you just sit there prettily and let them all come to you?"
Belle stuck her tongue out at Ruby.
"Like you had trouble getting dates in high school," she shot back to her leggy friend. "Or ever."
"Doesn't mean I never had to work for them," Ruby said sweetly.
"This may come as a shock to you," Belle replied. "But I didn't date a lot before we met."
"Really?" Ruby said, sounding genuinely surprised for the first time in their conversation.
"Really," Belle admitted. "Why is that so surprising, anyway?"
"Because," Ruby said. "You're kind of beautiful, you know? And you're genuinely sweet and nice. You're the kind of girl guys are usually tripping over themselves over."
"Well, I just wasn't really into that," Belle replied softly. "I just always wanted something...more."
"Well, you've got a chance at that now," Ruby said. "What are you going to do to get it?"
That was the part that Belle couldn't be sure of, because what did you do when you couldn't decide whether you were more afraid of losing something or of getting it? So, instead, she turned her head to the television in time to see Gaz rushing onto the stage at the last minute in order to perform the final number.
She couldn't believe Ruby had made her watch this. It was such a stupid movie.
"This guy kind of reminds me of Arthur," Belle blurted out before she could stop herself. That was probably the wine talking.
"Which part?" Ruby asked. "The naked part?"
Belle grabbed a throw pillow and whacked Ruby on the head. Next time, she was going to pick the movie or this wasn't going to happen.