I wake up at dawn. Still half-asleep, I begrudgingly push back the blanket and sit up to get ready for school. I yawn and rub my eyes tiredly, before blinking them open. Wait, my room doesn't look like this...

Argh, turtle whiskers! I'm in Rubona! The rain has ceased and sunlight streams through the open window, illuminating the strange, barely furnished room.

For a second there, unseeing and caught in routine, I thought I was home. Back on Cinder Island. Mum downstairs, making. Either breakfast, or out with dad before he leaves for work. Mimi still sound asleep until I kick him out of bed, when he'd start running around in a panic to get ready for school himself.

I bury my face in my hands. I feel hollow. Hollow and displaced. This is wrong, all wrong. But there's nothing I can do about it. There will always be something wrong.

Sighing, I let my hands drop onto the blanket on my knees, absentmindedly glancing sideways. My eyes land on Judai, the boy I'm not sure where to sort into my life. Friend? Random person I'll never see again? Boyfriend material? Loose cannon?

He's fast asleep. For all the claims of rising with the sun, they're a sleepyheaded bunch, those firebenders. Well, not gonna deny Judai his well-deserved rest. After such a night, he really needs it.

I cross my arms behind my head and slump back into the pillow. What Judai said last night doesn't grate on his nerves only. It worries me, too. What if something happened at home? Mimi not getting out of bed without his big sister would be the slightest problem right now. Mum probably didn't get much sleep the past two nights. I wonder if she's lying awake right now, thinking about me, the way I think about her?

I wrinkle my nose in disgust when I ponder the reaction Hirai's family will probably have. I'm sure Mimi would look to his best friend for emotional support, but considering his parents' opinion of me, they're probably wishing me good riddance and hope I'll never come back. The only reason why they never turned me in is that they don't want to explain to their son why the scroll-obsessed girl at Mimi's place is gone. They don't want to hurt Mimi, because that means hurting Hirai.

Maybe I should stay away.

The thought horrifies me. I don't know where it came from, but... Isn't it true, in a way? My family would be better off without me. They could finally show their noses in society, without being afraid of getting busted. Be your average Fire Nation family. Maybe have another firebending baby, while I'm off gallivanting around with the Avatar. Maybe get rid of my distinctive Fire Nation speech and settle down in the Earth Kingdom.

Okay, I'm becoming bitter and ridiculous again. As if I'd ever move to the Earth Kingdom. Or keep away from my family. Hirai's parents can think what they want, they did it for the past four years.

It doesn't make it any better, though. I don't feel like lying around any more, I need to do something. So I get up and pad across the straw mats to the slide screen. I wonder if I'm the only one who's awake?

I ease the slide screen open and slip past it into the center area, and I can check Sokka and Toph off my list. Those two aren't going to do anything in the near future. Next stop are Aang and Katara, but they sleep like turtle ducklings as well. Hmm, whatever. I sneak over to the washroom for morning routine. Nothing better to do, and it'll save me the queuing later. Six people on one bathroom is a horrible ratio.

I'm happy to find that the inn is equipped with running water. Humming appreciatively, I open the tap and splash my face with the fresh, cooling liquid. There's even a shelf with washrags and towels, which I make generous use of until I feel halfway presentable. My hair is still a mess, but I suppose I have to live with it for now.

I put the washrag to the side to mark it as used and leave the washroom, only to find that Aang is awake. I wave and mouth a silent good morning. The little Avatar returns with a brilliant smile, then gets up to hog the washroom on his own.

I tiptoe back to where I came from and pick up my clothes. I kept my pants and chest wrappings on for the night, so there's only my tunic and surcoat to take care of. And where did Judai hide my hair tie?

Halfway through washing up as I am, I strike out to find a toilet. I take the time to tell Aang about my plan, then put on my shoes and wander down the stairs, along a corridor where I can hear some of the other children get ready for the day (I wonder which room houses Nila?), down another staircase and into the yard of the inn, where I find a lean-to with a couple stalls. They don't smell all that well, but I don't complain. They're clean enough and beat the bushes anytime.

Such luxuries... I wonder how I'll fare with the gang. Camping is nice and all, but to be honest, I don't think I can handle it as a permanent condition. I'm not cut out to be a fugitive.

"What choice do I have?" I sigh for myself, wash my hands under an outdoor faucet and go back inside. On the way, I run into the innkeeper, the female part of the couple I haven't met yet. She's a homely, red-faced woman with black hair and a generous midriff bulge, but her eyes are bright. She seems very friendly, a bit like a teddy gopher bear.

"Good morning," she greets me with a smile, and I smile right back.

"Good morning."

"You're up early," she remarks. "Did you not sleep well? You look tired."

Really? I am? "I'm fine," I reply, still smiling. "But thank you for your concern."

She doesn't seem convinced, and I can't really blame her. I mean, I do feel tired, unsurprisingly. It has been my worst night in months, with my splitting it between comforting Judai and feeling sorry for myself.

The innkeeper purses her lips thoughtfully. "Breakfast isn't ready yet, but how would you feel about a cup of green tea to start the day?"

My first impulse is to refuse. I don't want to be a burden. Plus, Aang is waiting. But a refreshing cup of tea does sound tempting, and I like green tea.

"I'd love a cup," I decide and give a quick bow. "Thank you very much."

The innkeeper smiles again and leads me into the kitchen behind the taproom counter. I feel a bit out of place at first, because staff only and everything, but gradually calm down.

"Can I help with something?"

"Oh no!" the innkeeper laughs. "My husband explodes when I let other people touch his utensils, especially children. Sit down and stop worrying."

"Okay..."

So I sit. While the innkeeper is busy boiling tea, I take a look around the kitchen. The chair I'm sitting in has been squished into a corner, a counter with basins for dish-washing to the left, a wall to the right. A table is nowhere to be found, so the chair appears to be for resting instead of having lunch. There is a huge fireplace in the middle of the room rather than off to the side, walled in by a rectangle of stone counters. A gridiron is hanging from the ceiling above it. Gotta hand it to whoever built this place, that's some barbecue! And it can even be used to make tea!

A cauldron is occupying another corner, and I suppose it can be switched with the grill. It looks kind of heavy, though. Last but not least are the cupboards and shelves filled with any number of things remotely useful in an inn. Dishes, spices, drinks, you name it, I bet you find it. It looks all crowded and chaotic, but clean. In short, it looks like a whole lot of work. I suppose innkeeping is one of these things you need to be passionate about to be able to pull it off for a living.

"What are you thinking about?" my host interrupts my musings, handing me a big mug of tea. I thank her and try taking a sip, but it's too hot. Which means I have no excuse to refrain from making small talk.

"I thought you have an impressive fireplace. It actually seems like more trouble than it's worth. No offense."

"None taken," the innkeeper assures and pours herself a cup of tea as well. She hums contently. "Of course, it's hard work to keep everything clean, especially the grill. But I can't say it's not worth it. The guests enjoy their stay, and it's very rewarding to hear their thanks." With a grin, she adds, "Of course, the coins they leave are very rewarding, too."

"Of course," I chuckle, then another thought hits me. "What about us? We're eating you out of house and home without paying for it. Doesn't it put a serious dent into your earnings?"

"Oh, that's nothing for you to worry about. We'll receive compensation from the army. We need to take good care of our children, after all."

I nod with relief. It reminds me of what I love about the Fire Nation – the social system is only one of the many things guaranteeing your livelihood. Nobody gets left behind.

I deliberately blow at my tea and take another sip. It's still hot, but drinkable hot. I wonder if I should say something else, maybe about my plans for the future. But there is not much to tell. Apart from the fact that I apparently inherited my father's natural-storyteller voice, I'm not sure what to do with my life. Not innkeeping, that much I know now. Maybe I should offer my sympathies to Judai. (Although I suppose he might feel offended by that rather than amused. He seems to find a lot of things funny, but this is about his grandmother's inn.)

"You're shy, aren't you, young lady?"

I furrow my brows behind my mug. I'm in no hurry to put it down, but I have to eventually. My eyes remain glued to the tea though. "I suppose you can call me that..."

"Aw, better leave you alone then, right? Enjoy your tea."

And with that, she's gone. Where to, I wonder. Probably to wherever her husband is, but where's he?

Hmm, none of my business, I guess. I slowly but surely empty the mug, and I can already feel the effects of the theine rush. I place the mug on the counter next to me and get up, making my way back to our room.

My first official act upon entering is jumping in shock, shrieking a "Whoa!" and narrowly dodging a pillow. "What the ashes?!"

"Stray pillow!" Toph's voice cheers somewhere. "Excellent timing, Fireflake!"

The next thing I manage to process is Sokka in front of me, topknot-less in his underwear, face a bit paler than usual. "Hey, you almost slammed the door into me!"

"Sorry, but how would I know you're there?!" I fire right back. "What's going on, anyway?"

"Your boyfriend threw his pillow at me!" Sokka vents. "And when he missed, he threw yours!"

"And a pity that one missed, too," Judai deadpans from his spot on the bed. "Plus, I'm not her boyfriend. And now leave me alone." He belly-flops and pulls the blanket over his head.

I blink once. I blink twice. I turn to Sokka. "What the ashes?" I repeat, puzzled and slightly angered from the lingering shock. "What happened here?"

Sokka rubs his temple with the heel of his hand, seemingly puzzled himself. "Toki said she heard something weird from here, so I came to check and found Judai moving and grunting in his sleep. It was creepy, so I woke him up and now he's acting aggressively like this."

"I'm fine!" the blanket pile calls emphatically. "Stop fussing!"

Sokka lifts his hands helplessly, with a look on his face which unmistakably says, See? Told you so.

I sigh in resignation and jerk a thumb over my shoulder to indicate the slide screen. "You two get out. I'll handle this."

Sokka nods his understanding. His hand brushes my shoulder in passing, then he takes Toph and the two disappear. I sigh once again and rub my face tiredly. Why me?

I kick off my shoes and pad over to the bed, gathering the pillows in the process. I sit down on the edge next to Judai and gently pull the blanket off his head, revealing the brown mop making up the back of it.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he grumbles into the mattress and blindly reaches for one of the pillows. "Just let me sleep."

I'm inclined to believe him, but that disperses quickly when Judai starts coughing, something he hasn't done since... since he talked to me for the first time. It forces him to his side, and I can see his face glisten in the early morning sunlight. Before I can change my mind, I grab his shoulder and press it down, turning him onto his back. Judai swats at me and I let go, mission accomplished.

This time, I can't blame the sickly appearance on the lighting. Judai looks truly unwell, pale, sweaty, with bloodshot eyes. He quickly closes them and rolls back to his side.

"I'm fine, Kami, really! Let me get some sleep and it'll be alright!"

I doubt that. I feel Judai's forehead and my heart skips a beat. "Ju, you're burning!" How long has he been like this?!

"I'm a firebender."

"My brother is a firebender. I know his body temperature isn't any different from mine, so don't even try. You're not supposed to be burning up like that!"

"So I'm a little feverish," Judai argues petulantly. "What of it? It means I need sleep, so will you kindly get off my case now?"

He does have a point, and I guess it can't be all that dangerous if he's still capable of throwing pillows at Sokka.

"Alright," I concede, albeit reluctantly. "But tell me if anything happens, okay?"

"Got it."

I shake my head, then cup my face in my hands, elbows resting on my knees. Caring about people is surprisingly wearing... I think about Nila, and promptly wonder how many kids are suffering through the aftermath of the stressful escape right now, right at this moment.

After a month, I got a review, and the motivation juices were flowing. I always tell myself not to get too hung up on lacking reviews. People have other stuff to do, and that's perfectly fine. Real Life and such things. I was a bit shocked about myself, how ecstatic I was.

To answer the update question, my dear anon: I just did. XD I update when I deem a chapter fit for the public, which may or may not take a while. The last chapter felt unnatural for a very long time, I re-wrote and edited at every corner. This one, on the other hand, came rather easily. So yeah, update time depends on the chapter. And on the amount of Real Life invading my writing time.

Recently, I've been reminded more and more of the reasons I don't like writing romances. Couple development eats up so much screentime which could be used for such unimportant stuff like... I don't know, plot?
I still love my work, and my two babies, but I'd love it even more if it wasn't so slow. :/
Oh well, that's how it is. Can't get too hung up on that, either, or I'll never get anywhere. Nobody is perfect, and I'm still working on pacing. And descriptions. That's what I'm here for. :)

Zentauria over and out~