Author's Note: This is the third story in my trilogy. Funny, but when I wrote the first story (Meetings) that was going to be it, just a single story to see if I could do it. Then I decided that it needed a sequel (Pairings) and that would be it. Then I had a last minute idea for the last lines of Pairings and that led to this story. Long story short, to understand this one it would probably be helpful to read Meetings and then Pairings since this is a continuation of those stories and characters. I hope you enjoy reading this. Reviews are always greatly appreciated.
Reunions
As the Doctor in his ninth regeneration nervously reached for the Tardis door, he wondered what he would find. The Tardis was being very secretive about the destination, to say nothing of her renewed desire to decide where they would go without first consulting him. It had been quite a while since she had gone astray. Of course if you asked his previous traveling companions, they considered her a nonstop mystery tour. It seemed that the Doctor would enter coordinates to where he wanted to go and the Tardis took him to where she or the Time Lords felt he needed to go at the time.
The Time Lords, he thought and sighed, remembering all the times he had been so very livid at the thought that they would dare interfere in his travels. He had to admit if he were truly honest, that it was just as likely that the Tardis had simply malfunctioned as it was the Time Lords had hijacked him. But immediately before the Time War, the Time Lords had interceded and brought his Tardis up to date assuring him that she would no longer wander aimlessly. They needed him as well as her, to be ready to come and go at a moment's notice. Till now, that is.
At least he had been able to return Rose and Mickey to their correct time and place. After their experience in the alternate Universe, Rose had finally been able to let go of her desire for a relationship involving the two of them. He hadn't been able to quit thinking about Sarah, his Sarah, especially after seeing her counterpart in the alternate Universe.
He had been going in circles in his mind, overthinking the pros and the cons of contacting his Sarah. Thinking it might help to say things aloud, he waited till Rose and Mickey were in bed one night. At least he thought they were both asleep. He had been going on and on aloud, pacing around the central console, talking to the Tardis about what he hoped would happen, what he feared would happen and how sorry he was that he had been stupid enough to let her get away. Or more to the point let the Time Lords take her away. He could feel the Tardis' recurring rhythm deep inside his soul agreeing with him. It was after a particularly self-pitying tirade on how he gave up the best thing in his life and he didn't deserve anyone as wonderful as his Sarah, that he saw movement from the corner of his eye. He spun around in time to see the back of Rose as she slipped from the room.
The next morning Rose stated that she thought it was time that she and Mickey returned home. She never said a word about what she had witnessed the night before. The only odd behavior she exhibited was her newfound interest in Mickey. Rose spent the remaining hours in the Tardis packing and hanging on to Mickey, literally. Poor Mickey, he never knew what happened. He only knew that Rose wanted him again and decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth and took advantage of it.
When he dropped them off Rose simply thanked him and gave him a quick hug before running out of the Tardis and toward the Powell Estates, to her mother's waiting arms. Over Rose's shoulder Jackie mouthed the words 'thank you' with a smile. Mickey on the other hand had given the Doctor a bone crushing hug and a resounding thank you before gathering Rose's and his own bags and left the Tardis. He remembered standing in the doorway watching the trio disappear, getting smaller and smaller. When he could no longer see them he closed the Tardis door.
He smiled and walked up the ramp saying, "Well it's just us now old girl. Where shall we go while I figure out what to do next? Maybe Zanea Four," then scratching his head continued, "no better strike that. I forgot, they preferred I never return. How about Klytrillia, sure they once had a shoot to kill order on me. But they took it off once I explained the situation." Sensing the Tardis' apprehension, he said, "All right not Klytrillia. So maybe Frilliazciun, they liked me there," he frowned, "till I blew up their power station. But I'm sure by now they've forgiven me. Don't you think old girl?"
That was when it happened. The Time Rotor had started to move and he could feel the Tardis dematerializing. He ran to the far side of the central console, trying to override what he hoped was a delayed reaction of traveling back and forth between the two Universes to no avail. No matter what he did, he couldn't stop her. He realized he could disconnect the Vortex Drive and cause himself a great deal of trouble or just hang on and enjoy the ride. "All right old girl, I hope you know what you're doing."
That was five minutes ago, and now he stood with his hand on the Tardis' door. As he opened the door, bright and warm sunshine greeted him. He smiled as he turned around and locked the door. Wherever he was it was a beautiful day or night he corrected himself. Maybe this planet was bathed in sunshine all the time. Looking around as far as the eye could see were trees, lots of trees. Smiling, he approached one. Pulling a leaf off, he looked decidedly confused. Examining the leaf in his hand as carefully as a jeweler would examine a beautifully cut diamond, he said aloud, "An Oak leaf? I'm on Earth?" Looking back at the Tardis he said, "You brought me back to Earth? Why?"
He threw his hands up in the air, releasing the leaf. "Why would you…?" Seeing movement he stopped and watched the children that had suddenly come into view. There were ten children, running and playing. They were still quite a distance from him as he raised his hand and waved at them. Hoping to find out exactly where he had landed, he began walking across the field. The children were caught up in their game and ran back the way they had come. Deciding that that was as good of a direction as any, he started walking in the direction the children had run.
As he reached the clearing, he realized that he was in the midst of a huge park. There were people everywhere, people of all ages. Most were gathered around their own barbeque grill, caught up in the excitement of the day. "It must be some sort of holiday." he said to himself as he scratched his head. He looked around taking in the scene of typical Earth families enjoying themselves, talking and watching their children swimming in the pond that had gone unnoticed by the Doctor till now.
A large camera on the shoulder of an equally large, burly dark haired man, as well as a tall, thin red haired man holding what he assumed must be some sort of overhead microphone and a petite, thin woman with blonde hair had arrived at the opposite edge of the clearing from the Doctor. Their arrival was attracting a huge crowd as families left their picnic tables and grills in order to be filmed by this trio. Feeling capable of moving around without attracting too much attention, the Doctor walked out into the clearing. He stopped at the edge of the picnic tables and glanced down. There was a newspaper lying on it, the paper showed the date as July 4'th, 2011, with the headline, 'Independence Day'. He had hoped to slip into the group of people and just be another face in the crowd. But before he could reach the group, he heard a voice, barely audible crying for help.
Reacting quickly he scanned the area noticing that the crowd was unaware of the situation. With a quick glance toward the large pond, he saw a child's head barely clear the surface before going under the water. He took off his leather jacket and boots, never taking his eyes from the spot he saw the child go under. As he ran towards the lake he knew the consequences for the child would be dire if he didn't reach him quickly. His only thought as he dove into the water was that the child hadn't come back up. The closer he came to the spot; he realized that someone else was heading for the same location. It was a woman and she was swimming as frantically toward the last spot the child had been seen as the Doctor. Both disappeared under the water in search for the boy. They both reached him at the same time.
The pair working as one raised the unconscious child to the surface together. Without a glance to the woman by his side, "The shore." the Doctor blurted out, barely able to get the words out after being underwater and swimming so vigorously. He swam with an arm around the child as fast as he could with the woman swimming behind. The closer to the pond's edge he swam, he could hear a large number of people, some screaming and some yelling. But he put them all out of his mind, instead focusing on getting the child out of the water.
The Doctor lifted the child from the water and laid him on the ground. Both the Doctor and the woman were out of breath, but before the Doctor had time to react the woman was next to the child doing CPR. The Doctor took in the woman as she breathed life into the child. She was young, perhaps 24 or 25, petite, very slim and had long brown wavy hair which was completely covering her face. Immediately the Doctor felt a sense of familiarity. But more than familiarity, he was almost reeling from the connection he felt from this woman.
Before he had a second to process the emotions the woman was evoking in him, she said without turning around, "Call for an ambulance. Where are his parents?"
The Doctor's head was swimming, he was spinning out of control and he couldn't stop it. A rush of people separated him from her. He heard a woman crying hysterically, screaming for someone to save her child. Then he heard the little boy crying and the crowd began to clap. Soon the crowd backed away from the child, his parents, the woman and himself. The camera crew that had distracted the group previously was now pushing their way through the crowd. He turned around to see the woman with obvious panic at the attention she was suddenly garnering, rise and take off at a run before disappearing into the tree line, the same direction had had come from.
The Doctor climbed to his feet quickly, patted the child's mother on the shoulder and said, "I'm sure he'll be fine now." before quickly running toward the same tree line, grabbing his jacked and boots as he passed them. He could hear the group calling for him to return but he ignored them and kept running. A million questions were running through his head. Where was he? He was able to answer that one. From the accents of all the people at the picnic, he was in America. What year was it? The paper had said July 4'th, 2011.
If that woman was Sarah and he knew it was, it had to be Sarah Jane from the seventies. She was only in her mid-twenties and he knew he shouldn't cross his own timeline. But he and Sarah were never in the United States together. And the clothes…her clothes weren't from the seventies. Could he be in yet another alternate reality? No, not this time. It didn't make sense. By now he had reached the large, more open area where the Tardis had landed. But where was she? He knew she had run this way.
As he approached the Tardis, he saw her. Sarah was lying on the ground in front of the Tardis unconscious. He was at her side in seconds. He brushed the wet hair away from her face. "Sarah?" he tried. "Sarah?" he tried again. She was still, very still. He checked her pulse and found it to be weak. Taking in her appearance, he noticed that she seemed to be dangerously thin. He pulled out his key and unlocked the Tardis. He stopped just long enough to pull on his boots and put his jacket on before turning back to Sarah. He easily lifted her and carried her into the Tardis.
Once inside he climbed the ramp and pressed the button on the console closing the door before taking her to her old room. He hadn't had the heart to eject it. Even when the technicians on Gallifrey had said to eliminate all rooms but the essentials, to pare her down for battle, he couldn't do it. As long as that room existed, there was still a part of her here. He looked back, remembering the many times he sat on the side of her bed, attempting to draw strength from his memories of her during the very worst times of the war.
The Doctor laid Sarah down carefully, unsure of her health. Her clothes were soaked. As he looked her over he noticed what she was wearing for the first time. Gone were the pristine professional clothes. She was wearing a pair of black shorts and a blue tee shirt, both very worn and in need of replacement. The Doctor bent to remove her shoes, a pair of worn out sneakers, the strings on one shoe tied together to make it usable, the soles of the shoes had small holes, the rubber worn thin. What had happened to her? Could something he'd done caused this? And how could she be as young as she looked? So many questions without answers.
He frowned as he held the shoes in his hands. Looking back down at Sarah's face, he jumped in shock, unaware that she was awake and watching him. "Sarah!" he cried out in relief. "Are you all right?"
Sarah looked at him as he held her shoes, ashamed that he had taken such an interest in her choice of dress. This was 'the Doctor', of that she had no doubt. She could see it in his eyes. No one else had the same mixture of passion and yet at the same time intensity in their eyes, only the Doctor. In the regeneration that she had travelled so extensively with, he had barely noticed 'when' she was wearing clothes, let alone 'what' she was wearing. Well…not till that last year anyway, Sarah thought. Now that he did notice, all she felt was shame. Ashamed that she wasn't caring for herself the way she once had and ashamed that he had found her when she was in such desperate need of help.
Sarah decided to go on the offensive. "Why do you care? You left me more than thirty years ago. And before you say anything, I realize Time Lords don't have the same emotions as humans. But considering what happened between us, I don't think it would have killed you to check in on me and answer some questions! Do you?" Sarah finished, now sitting up in bed with her hands crossed over her stomach defiantly.
Before the Doctor had a chance to reply, Sarah's stomach had something to add. It grumbled, very, very loudly. Sarah's face turned red and tried to bluff her way through it. "My stomach always grumbles after a strenuous swim. Are you going to answer me?"
"I'll tell you anything you want to know on one condition." the Doctor said, raising one finger and placing Sarah's shoes on the floor beside her bed.
"What condition?" Sarah fired back hotly.
"That you take pity on me, just for an hour. I haven't eaten since yesterday, which is a stretch even for me. Have a meal with me and then you can yell at me." he finished with a smile.
"Fine, if that's what it takes." Sarah said as she climbed to her feet swaying slightly toward the bed. When she saw the look on the Doctor's face she said, "I'm fine."
"Good. As a special favor to me, stay here and rest. You're probably exhausted from the swim and saving that child's life. I'll come and get you when it's ready." he said before turning and leaving the room, not giving her a chance to argue. Just as quickly, he popped his head back in the door and added, "There are clothes you left in the closet if you want something dry to wear. If you're cold, a shower will warm you up, everything is where you left it. And by the way, that was wonderful back there with the child. I'm proud, very proud." He was now smiling from ear to ear.
He was smiling so much that Sarah couldn't help but return a small smirk of her own before saying softly, "You too."
The Doctor closed the door quietly and began walking to the Tardis' kitchen saying aloud, "So, I get it. You were tired of hearing me moan about Sarah and somehow you knew she was in trouble. So you did something about it. Thanks!" The Doctor raised his arms and spread them out as if embracing the Tardis, smiling the entire time.
Sarah looked around the room taking it all in. If she closed her eyes it would be all too easy to pretend that she never left. She would just jump out of bed and make the short trip down the hall and find herself in the console room. The Doctor, 'her Doctor' with his legs sticking out of the underside of the central console, the only part showing was the lower half of his body and that never ending striped scarf. Her smile faded as she realized that those days were nothing but a dream now. He was gone, changed again, into what or who? She knew it was still the Doctor and she knew 'her Doctor' was still in there, somewhere! She also knew that he had hurt her deeply. The question now was, could she forgive him? Did she even want to?
Sarah stood, slower this time and walked over and opened her old closet. Seeing the clothes hanging there waiting for her, as if she had never left was a bit too much for her and the tears began to flow. "This is ridiculous!" she said aloud to herself. "They're just clothes!" But she knew they weren't just clothes. They were clothes that she wore when she had been at her best, the happiest time in her life. Wiping her tears away with her hand she pulled out a pair of jeans and a pair of tennis shoes that had been left behind on that terrible day, the day he had sent her away. She pulled out a drawer from the armoire on the other side of the room and examined the sapphire sweater, remembering the last time she had worn it. She and the Doctor had been watching the double moons rise on Draakin Two. It was just as the Doctor had promised, it was beautiful.
As the tears threatened to come again, Sarah quickly took a shower and changed into her clean clothes. She had forgotten how comfortable it could be, the simple act of having the luxury and privacy to shower and change into nice clean clothes. She found that the things most people took for granted were now precious to her. Still, it was better to be on the run and without, than to be owned body and soul by Torchwood. Feeling exhausted and unable to think about it any longer, she let herself lay back down on the bed and intended to just rest her eyes for a few minutes. But with the comfort of the bed she found she went instantly to sleep.
After showering and changing into dry clothes, the Doctor quickly put together some sandwiches and chips on a tray only to be interrupted by the Tardis' automated food delivery system with a few additions of her own. Standing on the counter were two chocolate milkshakes as well as two plates laden with an assortment of salads. "You're worried about her too, aren't you old girl?" the Doctor said with a knowing smile to his oldest friend. The Doctor piled everything on one tray and headed for Sarah's room.
When he reached Sarah's room he had to make a concerted effort to wipe off the big smile that was currently on his face. She hadn't forgiven him or said she would stay…yet, he reminded himself. Raising his hand he quietly tapped on her door. After waiting a few seconds and hearing nothing, he set the tray on a table in the hallway and quietly turned the knob. Sarah was sleeping, and from all appearances, sleeping very soundly. Once again he couldn't help but notice how young and frail she looked. She was sleeping on her side with her legs pulled up. Quietly he reached inside the wooden chest at the foot of the bed and removed a blanket, carefully covered her with it. Sarah began to stir, but he said, "Shhh. Go back to sleep." in what he hoped was a comforting way, feeling that she needed some uninterrupted rest. Sarah visibly relaxed and was asleep again instantly.
The Doctor quietly opened the door and returned with Sarah's food and milkshake, setting it on a table near the bed where she would see it when she woke up, knowing that the Tardis would keep it at the correct temperature till Sarah was ready for it. Taking one more look the Doctor couldn't help but smile, seeing Sarah once again sleeping in her bed, before he quietly closed her door.
Deciding his time would be best spent in the Tardis' library where he would be less likely to hover over Sarah, the Doctor chose a comfortable black leather high backed chair in front of the roaring fire in the fireplace. After a short time he realized it was a bit too comfortable as he was softly lulled into sleep.
Finding himself tossing and turning, he was no longer in the library and he was no longer in his ninth regeneration. Instead he found that he was in his third regeneration. He was reliving a past memory, a horrible memory, but why? He thought he'd exercised that demon a long time ago. Well maybe not exercised, more like locked it away and hoped to never see it again. Guilt was never something in any of his regenerations that he liked to stare too closely at, too many regrets, over too many lifetimes.
Looking back on that particular fateful day, Sarah and he had gone sailing on the planet Branchet. It was a beautiful day. Pale violet clouds hung in the air, slightly obscuring a pale pink sun that cast an incredible pale pink shimmer over the ripples of the water. It seemed like a perfect day, a day that had turned horribly bad, much too quickly. In the life of a Time Lord, he was still so young, only in his third regeneration and was still of the mindset that he could conquer anything. A belief he has long since abridged. The locals on the planet had tried to tell him not to go out onto the water. But they had no scientific equipment to back up their claims, only the words of their soothsayer. He had assured Sarah that their warnings were unsubstantiated dribble.
He smiled with satisfaction as he and Sarah boarded the small wooden sailboat. "This is very similar in design to the sloop I used on Earth. Yes, very similar." he said as he rubbed his chin, deep in thought. "You see Sarah Jane, a beautiful day just as I promised." the Doctor boasted, sweeping his arms around. "Have you ever been sailing Sarah Jane?"
"No, I'm not really comfortable around large bodies of water. Aren't there any life preservers on this boat?" Sarah said as she continued to look in every nook and cranny she could find on the boat.
"You've been missing out on a wonderful experience. You know, I remember quite a while back when I won the Single Handed Trans-Atlantic Race. It was a BermudaSloop as I remember. Let's see," he said holding his left hand to his temple as he tried to remember, "I think that was back in 2008."
"What do you mean back in 2008?" Sarah exclaimed.
"Well for me it was back in 2008. How would you rather I said it?" he asked, with a big smile on his face.
"I don't know. It's still hard for me to think 'back' anytime when it's still 34 years in my future. Did you really win this race or are you just winding me up?" Sarah challenged him, returning his smile.
"I did! At least I would have if I had taken the time to register. But I did win…just not by their petty rules. I beat Thomas Coville by over an hour! But would anyone give me credit? No, I wasn't registered. Petty rules for petty people." he stormed, shaking his fist in the air.
"Why didn't you just register?" Sarah laughed at the absurdity of the situation, stopping her search briefly to meet the Doctor's eyes.
"I was there on time. I started with all the others. Why did I need to register?" he fumed.
"Well maybe they needed it for the trophy." Sarah offered with a grin. She quickly glanced over the Doctor's shoulder, surprised at the distance they had already travelled. They had travelled so far away that the shoreline was no longer visible. How long had she been searching for the life preservers?
"I know one thing, they…" the Doctor suddenly cut off as he looked beyond Sarah and noticed that the weather seemed to be rapidly changing and making a path straight for them. The first of many large waves hit the ship and tossed it about on the sea.
"I thought you said the locals didn't know what they were taking about!" Sarah yelled to be heard above the approaching storm. The wind and lightning were bearing down on them before either could react. They were both knocked off their feet.
They both unsteadily climbed to their feet, reaching blindly for something to hold on to. A terrifyingly universal sound that sounded the same on any planet they had ever been to, as far as Sarah was concerned, that was the sound of cracking, breaking wood. Sarah and the Doctor's eyes met for the briefest of moments as they watched the gooseneck stretching and then the mast cracked and broke free. Then the boom broke free as the pair turned around, while still grasping the side of the vessel.
Without even a second to take a breath, the Doctor ducked and the boom missed him. Unfortunately for Sarah the ship was rocking madly, the deck of the ship came up to meet her. Thrown off balance, Sarah was sent pitching forward meeting the boom head on. She never had the time to form a single coherent thought before she lost consciousness.
Sarah was thrown over the side of the boat, hitting her head on not only the boom but also on the side of the rocking ship and cutting her head as well as her left leg on one of the sharp rocks that were now tossed about in the water with her.
The Doctor quickly jumped from the boat to reach her. He dove down and pulled her unconscious body from the seabed, surfaced and secured both of them to a piece of the boat that had broken apart shortly after he had jumped over the side. He held her unconscious body to the wreckage for two hours before someone from the planet that was looking for survivors, found them.
When Sarah was placed on the stretcher and he stared at her deathly pale face, he turned to the planet's form of emergency medics and discovered the severity of her injuries. He knew there was only one answer. Sarah needed far more blood than could be found aboard the Tardis. She needed a total transfusion. A good deal of her own blood had been lost while at sea. They were on an alien planet and she needed blood immediately, a lot of blood. So he did the only thing that he could do. He told them to take his. Because he was a Time Lord, his blood replicated itself at an amazing rate. It didn't matter at this point if their blood wasn't compatible; she was going to die within minutes if something wasn't done to save her.
Luckily for Sarah, they took him at his word and took his blood. They set up a bed for him next to hers and a line straight from his arm to Sarah's body. Early in the procedure Sarah's heart stopped beating for two of the longest minutes of the Doctor's life. The physicians began CPR and heart massage. The Doctor for his part began pumping his hand, attempting to increase the flow of blood from his body to Sarah's.
Hidden from his view by the group of medical personnel was a miracle. The second Sarah took a breath, an almost indiscernible stream of golden light escaped her mouth. The group surrounding her looked at one another, checking to see if each had witnessed the phenomenon. Before anyone could comment, the monitor detecting Sarah's heartbeat came to life as well. The group went into action, each of the staff in attendance momentarily forgetting the occurrence as they resumed treatment of their patient. Later as a group, they decided against telling the Doctor, not wanting to needlessly upset him further.
A few hours later he once again found himself looking down at Sarah's face, wordlessly begging her to open her eyes. After a few seconds he was rewarded when she did. He stroked her hair, tucking the strands behind her ears. The smile the two shared still made him smile and was still on his lips when he woke up. It was clear from her smile that she had forgiven him once again. He vowed silently to himself to take better care of her.
He was so young then. In those days he saw a tsunami as a momentary lapse in their adventure, a time to push himself to the limit. Unfortunately he had successfully convinced Sarah that if anything did come up, they could just ride it out instead of turning back. 'He' may have been able to 'ride it out' but Sarah and the sailboat couldn't. Bringing himself back to the present in the library and feeling he was no longer alone, he turned around to find Sarah watching him.
Sarah didn't know what to do or say. She was furious with him and had been for thirty odd years, to say nothing of everything the last twenty or so years of her life had brought her way. But sitting there by the fireplace, he was so much like the Doctor she had known. Still, she told herself, first things first. "So, why have you shown up here…and now?" Sarah asked emphatically with her hands on her hips.
The Doctor was still lost in the aftereffects of the dream he just had, and was still trying to connect the dots. "What?" But one glance at Sarah told volumes, she wanted answers, now. "I wanted you."
"You, you wanted me! Well isn't that just wonderful! I thought for the last thirty some years that you must be dead, because if you weren't dead you would have come back for me! I mourned for you! The Doctor I knew would have never left me to be chased and hunted to the point that I had to live…" Sarah said in one breath with tears in her eyes, her emotions choking her voice.
"I made a 'huge' mistake leaving you behind. When I left you…and why I had to leave, I didn't lie. I had to return to Gallifrey 'alone'. But then there was the Time War." Then he stopped after realizing what Sarah had just said. "What do you mean chased and hunted?" He rose and stepped toward Sarah aggressively.
Sarah alarmed at this new version with new temperaments, took a step back. "No, go back to what you were saying. What happened with the Time War?" Sarah asked, knowing that if the Time Lords were involved in a war of any kind, it couldn't be good. She decided to momentarily put her grievances on the back burner till she could process this new information.
The Doctor stopped moving after seeing Sarah take a step back. He was shocked that she would be afraid of him. With what he hoped was reassurance he stopped moving and gave her a small smile. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. You have to know that." Sarah gave him a small nod and he continued, "The Time War was a terrible war, a war that lasted 500 years. It was a war that put the Time Lords against all of Dalek kind. A war that cost both sides dearly. But in the end it cost me more. The Time Lords are gone, Gallifrey is gone!" The Doctor sank down in a chair closer to Sarah. "I was lost for a long time. Doing stupid and reckless things," he raised his head from his hands meeting Sarah's now tearstained face, "stupid things even for me." he finished with a small smile. "But no matter what I did, I somehow survived."
"For how long?" Sarah asked and after she saw the confusion on his face asked again, "How long were you lost?"
"You know how hard headed I am." he said with another small smile. "It took a while, a long while, a little over 200 years to be exact. I wanted to see you. It was all I could think about, but I knew it wasn't fair to you. I was so broken. It wasn't fair to ask you to put me back together again. While time had passed for me, I also knew that time had passed for you. It may have been stupid of me to assume that you would go back to your old life. I realize that now. All I can do is beg for your forgiveness."
"What about all the other Time Lords?" Sarah asked, only to see the Doctor shake his head no. "You're the last?" she asked pointing to him. "I'm so sorry." Sarah said as she approached his chair and reached out and hugged him. "Isn't there anything to do, maybe go back and stop things?"
"No, the Time Lords severed the strands of time on the offbeat chance that the Daleks or I would attempt such a thing. Now I've told you everything. It's your turn." he said unwilling to give up the hug that Sarah had so innocently and voluntarily given him, her grief for his situation overpowering her hate of the circumstances.
Sarah stood and took a few steps back sizing up this new Doctor. He was tall, very masculine, his short dark hair and clothes spoke volumes. This was a man ready for anything at any minute. He had the same smile but of a different intensity. Of course a war that long and that devastating could, and it sounded like did, have a strong effect on the person he was. Still, Sarah thought, her life hadn't been blue skies and sunshine either.
"Doctor, I realize my loss has been in no way as great as yours and I also realize that you have been through something that I can't even begin to imagine. But…" Sarah sat down in a chair across from his, "my life has been out of control for so long that I can't imagine it ever being normal again. The way I live now, 'is' my normal. So I think it's probably best if you just forget you ever saw me." Sarah rose to her feet and began to leave the library.
Quickly and silently the Doctor was on his feet and at Sarah's side in an instant. With as much compassion as he could, he turned Sarah around and hugged her, barely leaving enough room for her to breathe. "Sarah, I don't know what's happened," he pulled her back looking into her tear filled eyes, "but it seems that when we're both apart, terrible things happen." They both smiled at that. "Now tell me, did you like your lunch?" The two laughed till both were crying, the tension now broke. He continued, "Tell me what's going on." As he slipped his arm around her shoulders he led her to a couch and they sat down.
Sarah looked at him deciding to give him the benefit of the doubt, at least for now. "I'm not sure where to start." she said wiping her eyes with her hand and taking a breath.
"Let's start with the fact that you look like you're in your twenties. How did that happen?" the Doctor asked as he took Sarah's hand in his, relishing the feel of her hand once again being held by his.
"I've thought about it a million times and the only thing I can come up with is that it has to be a result of what happened on Branchet. There's nothing else that affected me, well my body anyway, that significantly. Do you remember our trip to Branchet?" Sarah asked watching his eyes.
"It's so strange that you should say that. When you came in I was dreaming of our near disaster there." he said, blowing out a shaky breath, still having trouble dealing with almost losing Sarah that day. "So you think the transfusion stopped your aging?" he asked, knowing that it was true. He wasn't sure if it was the Tardis or something deep inside that brought the memories to the forefront of his mind, but it was too much of a coincidence that their fateful trip wasn't the answer to the question.
"It has to be. Don't get me wrong, it's every woman's dream to be eternally young. While it is great, too many of the wrong kind of people have noticed. I've run out of friends who are willing to help me keep my secret. So I guess in essence on a planet full of people, I'm alone." Sarah finished by looking down at her hands noticing the dirt stains under her fingernails and knowing that he saw them too, placed her hands under her legs.
"Why are you alone? What about our friends at UNIT?" he asked his face growing with alarm and anger.
"You don't know?" The Doctor shook his head no and she continued, "The Brigadier died of a heart attack about fifteen years ago now. Harry was lost a sea right after and Sergeant Benton was killed when he tried to save a family that lived across the road from him in a fire. That was about ten years ago. Up till then with their help, I was able to move from one UNIT owned house to the next and fly under Torchwood's radar. After they died, I tried to go back to the house that my Aunt Lavinia left me when she died years before. I was bringing some of my things over and I was just around the corner when I heard the explosion. I parked my car across the street from the house and that's when they caught me." Sarah shuddered, thinking back to that day.
The Doctor reached out and caressed her hand, hoping to comfort her. "Please continue."
"A van pulled up next to me the second I got out of the car. Someone hit me over the head and they shoved me inside and took off. Someone in the back had a syringe filled with something. All I knew was that if I didn't get away I never would. I pretended to faint. They said something about how Yvonne would be thrilled that they finally caught the 'walking fountain of youth'. Then they called in and told someone they were on their way. They hung up and one of them said, the surgical team would be ready for them. After hearing that, I was in a panic. I kicked out and thankfully luck was on my side." She took a breath and continued with a small smile, "I kicked him in a very sensitive area. We were crossing a bridge when I was able to get the sliding door open and kicked him out. He sort of bounced over the side and fell into the water. The driver slammed on the brakes. I was able to get my purse's shoulder strap from around my neck to around his neck. I twisted it till he was unconscious and jumped from the van."
"I went to the closest ATM and took everything out of my bank account and contacted the only person left, Mike Yates. He was able to get me a counterfeit passport that got me out of the country. Still Torchwood's arms are long. They've come close to catching me several times since I arrived in the United States. I can't hold a job without risking attracting unwanted attention, so sometimes I luck into the jobs no one else wants to do and they pay me in cash."
As Sarah took a breath he interrupted, "But where are you living?" He was afraid of what the answer would be.
"I mostly live in parks and sometimes I stay near some of the local vineyards. I chose California because of the weather. It's not that bad." Sarah finished by looking down at her feet.
"Sarah, I'm so tired of running away from the past, a past I thought I could never have again. I was never happier in all my lives as I was when we were together. I know I'm asking a lot considering how much I've put you through, but would you please consider coming back to me?" He stopped and reached forward picking up both of Sarah's hands in his and continued, "If you can't say yes now, will you please at least stay here while you think about it? I know the Tardis is glad to see you again and I know I'm overjoyed to see you again, so what about it?" He was still holding her hands and even though a part of him said to let them go, he finally had 'his Sarah' in front of him. If this was the last time he would be allowed to do this, he wanted to treasure every minute of it.
Sarah looked into his eyes, seeing nothing but sincerity there. It would be so utterly easy to say yes and just fall back into her old life, a life she loved. But things had changed. She had changed. Gone was the naïve girl who thought the Doctor would always be there. He had left her behind once, who's to say he wouldn't do it again. "I can't be abandoned again. My life right now isn't easy, but I would rather walk out the door than be hurt again by you." Sarah hesitated, then took a shaky breath and continued, her eyes never leaving the Doctor's, "You broke my heart. After you left I couldn't go back to being what I was before. That doesn't mean I'm laying all of the guilt on you. I wouldn't take back one second of my travels with you. I loved every minute of it. It's just so…addicting. So if this is about guilt or pity, just…don't."
"I do feel guilt, guilt that I wasn't there when you needed me, guilt that has turned your world upside down and guilt that you're alone. You should have never been alone, you should have been with me." he said, as he reached over and pulled Sarah onto his lap and held her tightly, the way he used to do. He whispered in her ear, "I pity myself." He pulled back, Sarah's face only an inch from his. "I had something so special, so perfect and I let it slip away. You have to admit, 'that' is a man to be pitied." He closed the distance and kissed Sarah, surprised to find that she was kissing him back.
Sarah pulled away and said, "I can't promise anything. My head is spinning and has been from the second I saw the Tardis. I want to believe everything you've said, but I need time, time to sort things out. But I know you, and I know the one thing you don't like to do is hang about when there's nothing for to do. So if you want to go off and have an adventure and check back with me later, I'll try to understand." Sarah looked at this new Doctor, waiting for his answer.
"Sarah, I will wait a hundred years if necessary." Sarah made a face and he corrected, "Okay, maybe not a hundred years but you can definitely put me down for ten. I really want you to stay in the Tardis while you decide."
"But…" Sarah started to protest but was stopped by the Doctor.
"Saving that child's life was wonderful, but you also drew attention to yourself. They'll be looking for their hero."
"Heroes." Sarah corrected.
"Fine, heroes. Wouldn't it be better to hide out in the Tardis while you decide? Besides, it will give me a chance to make sure you're all right."
"I'm fine." Sarah said nervously.
"So you've said, but couldn't you just this once humor me? Just for old time's sake. Please?" he asked, tilting his head and gave her his best smile.
"Okay, I guess you're right about the attention. As for you checking me over, I guess." She stood up from his lap and he could hear her as she walked away saying, "He'll never let it go till I do anyway."
The Doctor followed Sarah out the door, both on their way to the infirmary. The Doctor had a big smile on his face as Sarah looked back.
Author's Note: Eleven chapters to go. As always reviews are greatly appreciated.