The light knock woke Molly up from her nap. The book she'd been reading had fallen down to the floor from her hand, forgotten long ago. The only light in the room was the small reading lamp on the bedside table. Any visitor was unexpected this hour. Except one Sherlock Holmes of course, but he hadn't been there for ages, and to be honest she didn't really think that he would ever be there again. They haven't met for almost half a year, since the she slapped him. So no, it couldn't be him. He wouldn't knock just pick the lock anyway.

So Molly was more than surprised to see Sherlock through the peep hole. She took a deep breath to pull all her strength together to be able to cope with him or anything he wanted. She tightened her ponytail, straightened her jumper and with a determined movement she opened the door.

He looked so pale and skinny and... Scared? Molly opened widely the door and silently waved him to step in. Sherlock marched into the room with determined paces and while he was taking off his coat he looked around the flat, registering every detail, every change has been made since he was there. The memories from the time he spent with Molly suddenly flooded forward. He felt tired and weak from seeing all the possibilities he had missed and would never get back. He slowly turned towards the girl, who was still standing at the front door, biting her lower lip, her arms tightly crossed around her torso trying to avoid fidgeting or biting her nails. Clearly.

Sherlock looked her up and down. Molly knew he saw her nervousness and uncertainty. She felt she had to step out of the silence so she asked shortly. 'Tea?'

Sherlock nodded and Molly left to the kitchen relieved from having time to silence her jumping heart.

She was filling the kettle when she heard him.

'Molly...uhm...I am...' Sherlock finally managed to speak but Molly didn't turn just continued to prepare their tea. 'Molly, tomorrow I am leaving England... permanently,' he hove.

The cups she held stopped in her hand for a moment. In the deep silence Sherlock was waiting for her to take the next step. He felt his hands shaking barely and hid them into his pockets with a frown. But the next second Molly went on putting all the accessories on a tray like he hadn't said anything.

'Molly,' he started again, and hesitantly reached out to touch her lower arm. Molly let herself turn towards him staring at his hand gingerly holding her arm. Sherlock pulled back his touch clearing his throat. When Molly looked up at him her cheeks were full of tears running down silently. Sherlock swallowed hard before huskily speaking.

'I am sorry.' He was blinking quickly with a frown looking down at their hand.

'For what?' Molly whispered not risking louder voice in fear of her words would come out as pitiful whimpering.

'For everything. For hurting you, for leaving you then...and now. Can you forgive me?' He was looking deep into the girl's eyes now. 'Please forgive me,' he whispered.

Molly reached up cupping his cheek with her delicate hand and he immediately answered with leaning into her touch.

'How could I not forgive you?'

A long shaky sigh broke out of Sherlock as he placed his hand onto Molly's placed on his face. He slightly turned his head and pressed a lingering kiss on her palm with tightly closed eyes. Molly sighed to the feeling of his long desired touch.

'Why do you have to leave?'

The question came as a whisper but was unavoidable, Sherlock knew it. He let down her hand but still held it strongly. He had decided long ago that Molly deserved the truth. He looked into her eyes, searching her face.

'I murdered an unarmed man, and my brother was kind enough to send me on a six months long mission to Eastern Europe than lock me into prison for uncertain time.'

Molly gasped in surprise. He was half inclined to endure her dismissing him, but instead she stepped closer and reaching up pulled him into a strong, silent hug. Sherlock reciprocated it and buried his face into the crook of her neck.

'I know you didn't have any other chance. I know,' Molly murmured into his ear, caressing the back of his head, trying to soothe down his heavy breathing.

And in that exact moment Molly realized the meaning of the six months long mission. She felt her legs weakening under her, Sherlock had to hold her, her chest became too tight as the first sob burst out of her lungs.

'Oh no! No, no, no, no, no! Please say it's not true,' she whimpered grabbing his collar burying her face into his chest. 'Please say it!' She let her tears fall not being able to contain herself anymore.

He barely could answer. He was almost unable to swallow back the tremor of his own voice.

'I'm sorry, so sorry,' he managed to say, caressing her hair with tightly closed eyes holding her strongly against him with his other arm.

Minutes had passed when she finally felt herself pulled together enough to speak.

'For how long can you stay?' she asked silently still holding him.

Sherlock tightened his arms around her.

'I have to leave the house exactly at 6 am.' He murmured into her hair.

'Then we have time.' Molly sighed with a heavy heart.

'Yes, yes, we have.' And with this Sherlock pulled away slightly to look into her eyes and finally pressed his lips to Molly's desperately. She gave into it her whole body, heart and mind. All she wanted to know about was the present and that he was there with her.

I know, I know, you hate me. It was painful, and will be for a few more chapters. But have faith in me.

Thank you for your kind reviews, each one made me very happy.

I hope you liked it in a painful way, please let me know, what you think.