Yo! Back with the next chapter. Hope you enjoy!

Update: I've fixed the problems with the Lancer fight and Gae Bolg. Hopefully this works. And I added some extra details to some parts of the chapter as well as an omake.

I think I should add a label for whenever a chapter will be filled with Naruto flirting. I don't know...UCL (ultra cheesy lines) or SUCC (super ultra cheesy chapter).

Disclaimer: first chapter

Night 3 part 2

"Anfa! Stop me! I'm going to kill your Master!" He took his stance, a red aura coated his spear. Air shuddered as the causality-shifting Noble Phantasm illuminated the surrounding area. "Hurry!" Lancer turned, and thrust his Noble Phantasm while yelling his Noble Phatasm's name, "Gae…BOLG!" A crimson line of unpredictable lethality zigzagged its way to Shirou; it completely ignored Archer, who was in front of Lancer. The snake-like motion of the spear's point inched closer to Shirou's inevitable death.

Archer reformed his lance into its bow form hastily. In his right hand were three arrows. He took aim and nocked the string. Using his Prana, he projected more arrows, seemingly floating above or below the string. His fingers release, and the arrows fly from the bow at blinding speeds. The bolts pierce the air in order to get close to the spear; however, its unpredictable path allowed it to dart and weave around its attackers, completely missing the spear's point. "No!" Archer yelled. He repeated the action in hopes of changing the outcome. He shot another salvo at the rushing spear, and once again missed. The Knight grit his teeth, and ran to his Master's side. Had he left a Kunai by Shirou's side, he would have been there immediately. Sadly, he didn't have one to substitute with. He ran as fast as his legs could carry. Using all he could to get faster, Archer outran the spear by only a marginal second.

Rin ordered her Saber, "Help him!" The woman obliged and stepped into the battlefield. Her white clothing and silver armor reflected the Noble Phantasm's glistening red glow. In her right hand, her Caliburn sheathed in Invisible Air, contorted in preparation to counter the blow. The snake-like movements of the lance inched closer and closer into Saber's range. She slid her right foot back and twisted her body to the right. She leaped off her right foot and swung her blade, unveiling its true, golden blade as she did so vertically. The lance could not avoid Saber's strike, misdirecting its course into a total miss. She smirked at her victory, but it wasn't meant to be.

"Stay your guard, Saber!" She heard both Archer and Lancer's voices. True to their statement, she saw causality shift back to before the impact. In that small timeframe, she adjusted her body, making it turn left and shifting her body to the right to completely avoid the blade while also parrying it. The lance hummed dangerously, the electric sparks coursing through its point. Her sword ground against the attack for only one second before it skewered her left side. "Saber!" Archer yelled, his worry outmatching his obnoxiousness. Blood erupted on both sides and coated her armor and clothing. It only leaked more as soon as the lance pushed itself deeper into Saber's body. The injured Saber lurched forward, then landed on one knee to stabilize her weakening body. She pointed Caliburn towards Shirou, and unleashed Invisible Air to push the Master out of Gae Bolg's range.

"Not finished yet!" Lancer declared. "Anfa! You have to stop me now!" The spear slithered in the air, repeating its homing action to strike true to its target. Shirou stumbled backwards in fear of the attack.

"Get up, Master!" Archer drew Kanshou and Bakuya, throwing both of the swords at the most probable path it would take. The twirling blades intercepted the attack, and sent it flying for that instance. At that exact instance, Archer substituted with Bakuya, the sword that did not meet the lance's point. The sword switched positions with him, and he deflected the attack once more. The spear struck ground, and exploded the surface like an bomb drop. Time reversed once more, and Archer noticed it would take another path -through Saber- to kill his Master. Archer gathered Prana to his hands in order to project his shield. Red glowed over his palms. Lancer breathed a sigh of relief; Archer would use the one thing that could block Gae Bolg. Because of this, Lancer was forced to retract his spear, making uncomfortable squelching sounds of flesh as it pulled out of Saber's body.

Lancer used Gae Bolg as per his Master's orders to kill Shirou once more. But in order to do that, he pushed forward to make his target reach the effective range. "A-Archer! What are you doing there standing in the way?" Saber asked through the pain.

"He's my Master, Saber-chan." He simply answered. The projection finished just in time to stop Gae Bolg's advance. Stretching his left arm out, he bellowed, "Rho Aias!" A seven-petaled flower erupted from his palm. The defensive projection said to equal the defenses of seven fortresses took the lance's point without so much as a scratch on its surface. Saber stared in awe. Archer did not flinch at the attack; he knew this could stop the Noble Phantasm. She inspected the man before her. His broad back showed no tension in his muscles. He was without a doubt comfortable blocking this attack. It almost reminded her of Gawain in the way he takes a finishing blow for her if she couldn't recover to block an attack. "See? Only I can protect my Master." Lancer retracted his weapon, and prepared to strike once more as dictated by the Command Spell.

The most peculiar thing about the shield was the fact that the spear focused on the shield rather than its intended target. "Huh...I forgot the vixen rigged that shield of yours to override Gae Bolg's curse." Lancer said happily. "That fox knew what to do huh? How is she by the way?"

"Well, I suppose. Crafty she may be, but she is a woman. To redirect any attacks to hit this shield and override upon contact any curse is a wonderful thing to make. Even better, the shield's new abilities activate upon your eye contact with it." Archer smirked as he said those words. "I'm surprised you forgot about one thing that could counter your spear without the aid of luck. Now let's see you try to launch that again!"

Archer dispersed the seven-petaled shield, and charged with the intent of not allowing Lancer to launch one more activation of Lancer's Noble Phantasm. When the spearman did attack, Archer positioned himself in such a way that wherever the point would go, Archer would be there to intercept. As such, Lancer would not be able to unleash Gae Bolg, and had to resort to normal attack. He slashed one time, making it miss. Archer redirects another attempt, and advances. He repeated this dance until Archer missed his mark. The attack slipped through Archer's guard, and he couldn't chase after it in time. Lancer moved out of Archer's range of close combat that not even a substitution would save Shirou from death.

"Master! Defend yourself!"

Shirou was ahead in thinking and started to think of ways to defend himself. He had nothing he could reinforce. All he had were his bare hands that would no doubt tear off from blocking it. All he hoped to do was to follow Archer's hint.

A projection made real. A projection strengthened, reinforced…

Shirou commenced the tracing process with haste.

Judging the concept of creation

Hypothesizing the basic structure

Duplicating composition material

Imitating the skill of its making

Sympathizing with the experience of its growth

Reproducing the accumulated years

Excelling every manufacturing process

'I need a weapon!' he declared and demanded to himself. His mind forged the image of Archer's twin swords. 'Powerful weapons like Archer has!' His magic circuits burned at the new, foreign strain exerted to it.

"Trace…ON!" Shirou roared. Prana surged forth from his palms and encompassed them like the source of a lightning storm. The Prana morphed into a set of familiar blades, a pair of Yin and Yang Chinese Dao swords. Shirou reinforced the pair of weapons in his hand, and swung at the spear's point. Sparks flew off, and Gae Bolg started to shred the created weapons.

"Alright Master! Hold him off for a little while longer!" Archer leaped forward at a speed that almost matched Lancer's and thrust his open palms onto his opponent's abdomen. The double palm strike destroyed Lancer's stance, and reared his right hand. A blue spiraling sphere of energy not resembling Prana emerged. The sphere grew in size to the size of a basketball, and the Knight thrust it at Lancer. But before anyone could see the attack, both warriors disappeared from battle in a yellow flash. Saber, Shirou, and Rin looked dumbstruck at the disappearance of the two Servants. Rin most of all looked gobsmacked and stepped forth to stand beside her Servant.

"He can teleport too?!" She screamed, piercing Shirou's and Saber's eardrums.

"Oodama Rasengan!" Archer yelled as he ground the technique into Lancer's gut. The grinding sensation churned Lancer's insides, and began to tear away at his armor. The contained storm exploded outward, and launched him into a line of trees in the forest. Yes. Archer teleported Lancer and himself to the Einzbern forest. The trees Lancer landed towards had toppled like a line of dominoes. The bark tore apart, and its splinters and other various-sized shards flew into the air, and the sound of the thunderous descent of the trees scared off the nearby wildlife from nearing the battlefield.

Lancer picked himself off from the debris of fallen foliage with a tiny hint of difficulty. His arms were placed on a trunk of a fallen tree, and he used it as support to spring off from his restraints. He leaned on one of the laid trunks and wiped a sweat off his brow. He popped the joints in his body, making an ensemble of popping sounds from his neck to ankles. "My, my, Anfa… You certainly know when to just amp up the fight!" He gave the Knight a thumbs up, "Good job getting me out of range. I don't know how long or how many times I would keep using it in rapid succession." He, with his spear firmly grasped in his right hand, took his battle stance. "Plus this way, we can finally fight properly." The sunset shone on the edge of the blade on the spear, making it glint. He would have charged at Archer, but…

That is enough, Lancer. Return to my side.

Lancer sucked his teeth, and deviated from his fighting stance. "Well…it seems my Master wants me to return after a fruitless battle. It's nice seeing you again, Anfa." He turned his back on Archer, then poised his lance on his shoulders.

"And I you, Lancer." Archer replied as he saluted the spearman retreating from the battle. "You best be going lest you incur your Master's wrath…" He left the scene in relative silence, effectively leaving Archer in enemy territory. "Guess I'll head back too." He turned away from Lancer, and started to walk through the forest when- "Why am I walking? I just teleported here, so why am I walking?" He shook his head at his idiocy before teleporting back to the Emiya household.

Berserker arrived shortly after to investigate the destruction; moreover, he didn't find the creator of the destroyed area of the forest. He'd guess Archer, but there weren't adequate amounts of evidence linking him to the carnage done to the forest.

"-What else have you been hiding from me, Emiya-kun?!" Shouted an enraged Rin, who held Shirou by the collar of his shirt; his pants were almost revealing most of his boxers as well. And Rin was on top with her face dangerously close to Shirou's. Rin herself discarded her red jacket, and hung it on the top of a chair, and her hair looked like a mess just like her uniform. Such a sight would be quite awkward if someone else noticed it. So it would be no surprise that anyone can get the wrong idea at first glance. Archer himself took time to stand in silence to try, and process what was happening for the past three minutes he'd been gone. Either that, or he was actually was in the forest longer than he expected.

Archer decided to speak up to show his presence just outside the room Shirou, Saber, and Rin occupied at the moment. He cleared his throat and did his best monotonous voice possible. "If I didn't know any better, I honestly thought you'd teach my hopeless Master about sexual relations and actions. And by sexual relations, I mean to teach him how to use his ponos and point it into the vagoo, then jam it in." Shirou didn't understand Archer's words unlike Rin. She heavily blushed, her face fit the appearance of her red jacket. Saber banged her head on the wall to add extra injury to her body. Rin hastily released her clutches on Shirou, and stood up to make herself prim and proper to give Archer a stern talking to.

"First of all, we were not doing that!" Rin shouted at the tall Knight, "Second of all, you still have skills that you chose to hide from us. And finally, you knew Lancer intimately." She spitfire attitude did not faze Archer one bit. In fact, he chose to express Lancer's offhand demeanor to the girl before him.

"What do you want me to say?" Archer asked, "You looked like you were in the mood; emphasis on you especially. Next, I'd like to have trump cards, and lastly, so what if I knew him intimately? He was one of my teachers for crying out loud!" He would stem to the topic some more; however, his Master beckoned him.

"Yes?"

"I don't get it, Archer." Shirou said as he still lied on the floor in his disheveled state. "Ponos…vagooo…what? You lost me." Archer slapped his face with his palm. He pinched the bridge of his nose, and sighed deeply; it seems that his Master needed to be educated properly about it at another time. Maybe he could use the dolphin or dragon demo to enlighten his Master… But how exactly would he show the dragon or dolphin demo? It's not like he can use illusions to show what it means…

However, both Rin and Saber seemed delighted at Shirou's cluelessness on the opposite gender as well as his crotch's function to reproduce. Rin mentally decided she would not allow Archer to corrupt Shirou's innocent and naive soul in order to inadvertently keep Sakura's chastity intact.

"It means nothing of importance, Shirou."

"Hoh? 'Shirou' eh? You sly dog, Master. When did you get promoted to first name basis?" Archer's smile embarrassed Rin to no end. "We might have taken the next step in achieving your harem it seems…"

"You're still on that?" Shirou asked incredulously. "Why do you have to mention it whenever the topic is about girls?"

"Um…if you haven't noticed, Sakura is maddeningly in love with you. The archery club captain has a minor crush on you. The foreigner -Edelfelt was it- is taking interest on you, and now it seems Tohsaka-chan is giving you the benefit of the doubt." Archer's bluntness on the matter took the boy by surprise, and left the young Master in an awed, flabbergasted state that rendered him immobile and unresponsive to outside influence. Archer waved his hand in front of his Master's face, and saw that his Master's eyes did not follow the movements of his hand. "I must have broken him." He calmly stated.

"I am not taking interest in him." Rin boldly stated. Archer ignored her words to say something sage-like.

"I know how a woman acts, Tohsaka-chan. I've met various women with their exotic quirks and personalities. Tohsaka-chan, some of them acted like you do now; I know you're denying what little spark of affection you have for my Master." He turned to the guests of the household, "But that's my opinion or insight on the matter. You may evaluate it whichever or however you want. However I will also take a guess that you're hesitating to let Sakura-san have him." He said in a chipper tone. He didn't mean it seriously at all, yet somehow Rin had the feeling that Archer really knew how she felt. "Well, ladies, do you wish to have dinner right now?"

"If it'll get you to fess up about how Lancer was your teacher." Rin haughtily stated while still scowling at the Servant who thought he knew her from the inside out. "Then yes."

"Sure, sure." Archer dismissed the info gathering motive of the Tohsaka Master. "Now are there any requests before I head to the kitchen?" He waited a minute before he received no answer, "Okay. It's a surprise then. Saber, I'll leave a clone to tend to your wounds. Please don't hurt it; it's quite the fragile thing."

"I make…no promises, A-Archer." Saber stammered through the pain. Archer left the room, and created a clone to heal or at least make her comfortable enough to stand properly. Archer's clone held a pack of gauze and alcohol wipes in his hands, but first inspected the wound. He requested that Saber discard her armor and to raise her corset to allow him to see the puncture wound caused by Lancer's Noble Phantasm. For the sake of reaching peak condition, Saber reluctantly bared her smooth, firm abdomen tainted by the injury she sustained. Archer wordlessly cleaned the wound first with a few alcohol wipes before wrapping around with gauze. Then suddenly, Archer placed both his palms on the puncture wound. Green light bathed his hands. Saber looked astounded by this scenario; Archer was slowly healing her! She could feel her flesh mend together in a rapid pace, closing the hole entirely in a matter of minutes.

Archer removed his palms from the area, and reassuringly said, "That should do it. It's not perfect, but it will have to do at the moment. Take a rest; it'll be good for you." The clone poofed into smoke, and left Saber to her thoughts.

"You've taken a liking to the other me, Naruto." Saber of blue smirked.

"I know." Archer replied, "And it's quite awkward to say the least."

"'Awkward' you say? Do enlighten me on the subject matter." She requested with a hostile smile. Archer thought nothing of it, and continued to talk with Saber.

Archer answered the question with a tiny bit of sass. "Well you are my big-sister figure, so it's quite confusing to get properly acquainted to your other self without the thought of you barging into my head."

Saber looked amused to say the least. "If I didn't know any better, you admitted you have feelings for the other me, which in turn also means you like me."

"Well…" Archer hesitated. "There was that one time in my life as a child where I was attracted to you. Turns out it was just another tiny crush that I got over once I saw you as my older sister. However it seems that tiny spark is still alive and it's aimed at your other you." Archer chuckled embarrassingly as he let the truth out. Saber tried to recollect the moments when she took the man in front of her under her tutelage, and searched for those moments when the boy idolized her. She guessed that those times were when his admiration for her peaked. "It's best to not mull over it for the sake of not being confused." He said to her. "It's strange, but technically, she isn't the same as you, Arthuria-nee. Second magic and all… plus you're the woman who disguised herself as a man to be King whereas she revealed her gender and was able to rule despite her gender." He began to walk away, yet stopped mid step to ask one more question, "Any particular requests?"

"Not in particular no. You've free reign over my meal."

"Alright. Later Saber-nee." He walked to the kitchen, leaving Saber alone to hide away in her room that Archer had rigged to keep her presence relatively hidden. As of right now, Rin and her Servant don't know she's here, and don't think any other Servant besides Archer is here. She quietly left and headed for the dojo, her room, to train once more. Her skills will be soon needed; she could feel it.

"Good evening, Lancer." One Kirei Kotomine spoke ominously. "It seems my order has not been fruitful. Am I right in assuming so?" Lancer wordlessly nodded to his 'Master' and kneeled to him reluctantly. "Care to explain why you failed to eliminate Shirou Emiya?" His voice did not rise along with the sense of anger rising in the clergyman. "Was I not specific in my command, Lancer?"

"Oh you were quite specific, Kotomine; you were dreadfully specific in the drive you have to kill the boy." Lancer drawled. "To answer your question about how I failed, Archer teleported the both of us out of my effective range. He made us land all the way to the forest where the Einzbern homunculus resides. To be honest, I was surprised to see more rabbits come out of his hat." He snickered lowly as he kept explaining the situation. "Really now, that Archer is just too much. It's surprising how much he's grown from the incompetent boy he was…" Lancer's eyes widened as he realized he made the biggest mistake he could do at the moment.

Kirei perked at Lancer's statement, "Hmm… Perhaps you'd be willing to share your discovery to your Master, Lancer. After all, the phrase 'knowledge is power' couldn't fit any better for this war."

"Eh…no." Lancer promptly replied. He stood up from his kneeling position and chose to sit at one of the benches provided in the church. With one foot on the top of one bench and another crossing over the former, he pulled his head back and spoke, "That's for me to know, and for you to never find out." Kirei did not flinch at his Servant's refusal. He had expected this and had one countermeasure left to use. To Kirei, Archer proved to be too deadly of a Servant to allow him to live any longer. He thought using a command spell to wipe out Shirou Emiya would be enough, but the plan failed. Frustrated on the inside, Kirei clenched his fists and and readied himself to use his final command spell.

"I wouldn't be too hasty, Kirei." The clergyman looked behind him. Gilgamesh, the King of Heroes, sneered. "Is it wise to do that? Certainly the urge to sate that curiosity is nagging away at your temples, but do keep in mind that Lancer will not hesitate to kill you." The clergyman silenced himself because he knew the outcome, yet chose to pursue the thought. "The Servant is interesting…fascinating. Those eyes of his say much about our interaction in the past." Gilgamesh sat on top of one of the benches, then continued, "Strangely enough, I can't remember who he is."

"Milord."

"Kirei. I will find out his identity through battle; do not impose your will on Lancer with such an imprudent action." The blond Servant ordered. Lancer looked to the King of Heroes. Never in his life did he think that the arrogant Epic Hero would save his skin. He lowered his legs from the perch, and sat properly. Kirei bowed to acknowledge Gilgamesh's insight, and left the room. Gilgamesh turned to the Lancer, and spoke his mind, "You're in luck, Lancer. While a…foreign concept due to your ineptitude of obtaining luck, you have some, and I sprinkle it lightly. Don't waste this opportunity, Irish Child of Light."

"I'm indebted to you, Gilgamesh. Though when it comes the time to do battle, I'm unsure where my fealty lies. Once you remember Archer's identity, you will learn to hate-no loathe him once you do. You will hate me as well, but if it's any consolation, I won't forget this simple act of kindness." Lancer stood from his seat and walked over to the man to shake his hand as a symbol of his thanks.

"If you speak the truth, then I will shake your hand as a sign of my thanks for giving me your honesty of what may come." He did as he said, and firmly shook the blue clad spearman's hand. Lancer smiled at the reciprocating action. Suddenly, Gilgamesh activated his Gate of Babylon. Lancer jumped back and readied his spear. What surprised him was what the King of Heroes pulled out of his Gate: a vase full of wine. "Easy now. Care to have a bottle of the finest wine in my treasury?"

"Eh?"

Dinner was an uneventful time. Archer's menu, while extravagantly delicious due to the various spices he used on the tuna, the perfect texture of the noodles for the Miso ramen, the crisp flavor of the stew and the expert crafting of the rice balls and other such foods that rendered all the eaters at the table speechless. Rin and her Saber stayed after for a bit to discuss about their next move.

Archer spoke of the ever elusive Caster, who had yet to show her presence in the war. The Tohsaka and her Servant agreed that they hadn't seen the Magecraft-inclined Servant. In the words of Archer, "A Caster stays away from the front lines, but they are the most cunning when it comes to unexpected tactics. For all we know, we are already underneath her palm. While I extremely doubt that, it isn't impossible." He didn't say more because it's his Master's decision whether or not Archer would act. The Servant left the room to allow his Master full reign over his decision to take action. He didn't hear any of the laid plans, and merely waited for his orders by patrolling the residence's perimeter using his clones.

Night quickly fell, and Rin and her Servant were about to leave. The woman knight was the last to leave the residence, but not without a few choice words she gave to the Servant of the bow.

"T-Thank you for tending to my wounds, Archer. I sincerely apologize for my uncouth behavior during my outburst. It's unbecoming of a Knight to insult another's honor and right." She bowed customarily to the tall Archer. "To be accepted by Caliburn is no small feat, and for you to wield it means you've great strength to lead and the ability to fight." Archer resisted the urge to be sarcastic at the woman. As such, he let the woman continue with her speech. "Once our alliance is done, I wish to battle you for the true owner of Caliburn." She straightened her posture and the jade eyes stared into Archer's azure orbs. Her determination was translated by her gaze, and Archer smirked.

"Agreed. Do make it entertaining when our battle does happen, Saber-chan."

"But before I leave, will you disclose to me how you obtained my sword?" Saber inquired to the Servant of the bow. Archer adopted a thinking pose with his left arm supported by this right as his hand supported his chin. When he had his answer, he leaned in close to Saber's ear because of his height being approximately two heads above Saber's own height.

"That's a secret~" Archer replied in singsong fashion. He straightened himself to see a Saber with a betrayed look carved on her attractive face. It was such a cute sight that Archer wanted a camera to capture it to keep as a memory. "If you want to know so badly, then how about one date?"

"Huh?" Saber eloquently uttered from her mouth. "A date? Preposterous!" Her gentle gaze hardened at Archer's suggestion. "Why should I interact with your mangy mug?" Archer feigned hurt, and Saber actually thought she damaged Archer's ego. "I may respect you as a warrior, but I do not believe I am at the threshold of fatal attraction to be smitten by you." She crossed her arms and turned away. She felt a blush emerge; however, it wasn't prominent on her face, therefore insignificant to her current situation.

Archer smirked mischievously, "That's not a no, Saber-chan~" He drawled. "While your words sting me so, they do not deter me. Dear, mesmerizing Lily..." He said lovingly as he stepped closer, and raised a hand to caress her right cheek. Strangely, she did not slap his hand away. Even stranger, she seemed to be content and nuzzled into his hand like a cat purring to a human's touch. Archer glided his hands over Saber's soft, supple skin, and saw that she was thoroughly enjoying this. "I am bewitched by thy porcelain beauty. With thy eyes deep verdant like a forest, hair as fluid as water and shine like the sun, and a heart of a unyielding lion... My heart desires thee." His words, while absolutely cheesy in his mind, did give the woman a tiny blush. "Oh won't you reconsider?" He pleaded with his face close to hers; his lips nearing hers. "The Archer you see before you is far more different than the Archer who raises his blade for the innocent or for the love of battle." His smile reached Saber's fortified heart. He knelt to her like a man proposing to his future wife-to-be, and handled her left hand with a warm and delicate touch. He gave the hand a chaste kiss like a gentleman of the past, and the action wasn't overlooked by the Masters.

Saber, stunned by the course of action, stammered, "R-Reconsider…?" She shook her head wildly. "No! Absolutely not! I won't fall to your charms!" She stepped back with her blush increased. She almost stumbled, but easily recovered.

"Hoh? But it seems I already snagged it." Archer smoothly replied. He stood up with his hand still firmly grasping Saber's dainty hand. "If I've flustered you this much, then I've done something right."

Staring up at the courting giant, she blushed heavily after seeing Archer's tender smile. "Impossible! You're merely making false assumptions!" Saber retorted quickly without room for debate. "You have no evidence that pertains to the condition of my heart!" She tugged her left hand away from Archer's grasp and clutched it tightly. Her vehement refusal on the matter amused Archer to no end; Saber's blush only grew in size and intensity with each refusal she spoke. "Mark my words, I shall strike you down will all of my hate!" She removed Archer's right arm from her face and pointed an index finger at him. "Count on it, Archer!" The height difference along with her brave declaration made the claim seen as an outrageous boast, but admirable nonetheless.

"If you strike me down with all of your hate, then will love remain in your heart?" He asked softly. Saber looked stunned at Archer's silky words. The stunned countenance slowly transformed into annoyed fury, and Saber uncharacteristically scowled.

"Enough with your sappy lines, Archer. Your words won't sway me! Not now! Not ever!" The Knight turned away from him, then crossed her arms once more, "I will find out your identity by any means without resorting to going with along your impudent and heinous request. As a King and a woman, it's deplorable and unsightly to be in your company."

"Is it because I'm a vandal?"

"Yes." Saber answered.

"Fiendish?"

"Yes."

"Treacherous?"

"Yes!"

"Hazardous?"

"Yes!"

"A devilishly handsome renegade whose captured your heart?"

"YES!" Saber yelled frustratingly at the monotonous questionnaire Archer conducted. It took her five seconds to realize her mistake. When she did, her face lit up like a tomato, and her embarrassment for falling to Archer's trick made her try to cover her face with her hands.

"Haha! Got you." Archer cheered. "By all means, do try, Lily. I want to see how flawlessly you attempt to unearth my past. And when you give up, do reconsider my offer, okay?"

"Never!"

Rin gaped, and Shirou palmed his face. These two knew what Archer was capable of as a fighter, but as a lover...that seemed like another story altogether. Rin could see the charisma skill doing work, and she was absolutely terrified that Saber actually fell for his charms. To Shirou, the act of romancing Rin's Saber was outright foolish and embarrassing to say the least.

"Come on Saber!" Rin commanded! Saber hastily went to her Master's side. Her face still had a miniature and imperceptible blush on her face, but the instigator saw it despite being several meters away from Saber, who was in the dark. The Tohsaka did not say anything to her Saber or to Archer. She waved her hand as a sign of her farewell as both disappeared into the darkness of night.

"Really?" Shirou, at the front door, asked his Servant. "You'd take your time to flirt with Saber?"

"What can I say?" Archer turned and smirked at his Master. He gave a dreamy sigh that seemed to fit him. "She's a flower able to survive the battlefield and still look pristine and gorgeous to the eyes. The untouchable flower of the battlefield…"

"So this is the extent of your infatuation to my other self… I can't say I'm surprised." Saber, blue, said from behind Shirou. "Lancer has influenced you quite a lot in this aspect."

"Tell me about it." Archer replied back. "If not for him, I'm pretty sure that exchange would have ended at 'It's a secret'." Shirou had a difficult time believing that fact; moreover while doubting that, he gave his Servant a questioning gaze. "He taught me well to appreciate the opposite gender, and I don't regret it."

"At least you didn't take your godfather's lecherous personality." She sighed before heading inside. "Goodnight, Archer, Master."

"G'night/Goodnight." both males answered.

A distant shout of 'I FORGOT TO ASK ABOUT LANCER!' could be heard in the distance.

Midnight struck, and the full moon bathed the earth in a gray glow. Its rays hindered by ashen clouds allowed hotspots of silver to make contact with the ground. The Emiya residence was lucky enough to be given spotlight in this cloudy night. Saber and Shirou slept soundly in their rooms whereas Archer stood on the roof as the vigilant sentry of his Master's home. It was quite the silent night, but it certainly did not feel holy at all. He was filled with a sense of danger that he couldn't express with words. This feeling was obscured, and it wasn't anything familiar to him at all. This signature could only originate from a Servant, and Archer had only one true answer to this mysterious Servant's identity.

He narrowed his eyes as he muttered, "Caster…" with disdain written all over his face. He turned around when he head footsteps hitting the roof. Skeleton golems with only animalistic jaws for a head cackled with their bone bows and swords in hand. The Servant of the bow wondered how Caster slipped through his defenses, but did not fully commit to wondering how she accomplished the feat. He projected Kanshou and Bakuya, and swiftly cut through the mob of Caster's familiars. His attack was as silent as the night; as such, none of the people inside the house was alerted by this altercation. Even the summoner of those familiars did not realize that her minions were being torn apart so cleanly. Anyways, the Shinobi-trained Archer made bones transmute to dust and ash as he navigated his way across the rooftops to reach his Master's bedroom. "Please let me make it!"

Shirou felt lonely. He didn't know why, but this feeling seemed to stem from his surroundings he'd never seen before. While the building looked eastern in style, they looked archaic, and none of the buildings looked ridiculously tall compared to modern-day skyscrapers. The tallest building looked like a capitol building colored in red with the Kanji for 'Fire' as a sort of identifying emblem in replacement of a name. But moving from that point, the reason why he felt lonely is the fact that he was ridiculously given a wide berth by other people. While he didn't mind it, it was unnatural for people to steer clear of one person.

Only then did he realize that he wasn't the one people were avoiding; it was a young Archer not even eight-years-old. The future Servant-to-be looked to be lamenting over something. Shirou, the ever curious Master searched for the answer when voices battered against his head.

"Demon! Leave us alone!"

"You've no place here, Monster."

"Trash like you should die!"

The words struck Shirou at the heart. 'Who could say that to a kid?' He asked himself. The inhumane way these adults, full of scorn for Archer, disgusted Shirou to his very core. The offense would have been worse if Archer had been beaten black and blue; thankfully it looks like it didn't happen in his childhood. However, the lack of social interaction seemed to affect Archer negatively. Shirou could feel the despair in his Servant's heart. It was eating away a his every fiber of being, yet he put up a fortified front, growing stronger as each time his heart succumbed to his depression.

He saw the boy grow older to a twelve or thirteen-year-old boy, his heart still aching for meaningful interaction in his life with his brave outer persona holding his sanity together. Deeper into his soul, Shirou saw a dark presence form in the cracks of his vulnerable heart.

Again, Shirou is bombarded with another set of images: A pink-haired girl, a silent and smug raven-haired boy, and a white-haired teacher with his lower half of his face covered by a mask.

The scene altered several times, and each depicted Archer's teamwork with these people as they fought hundreds of foes. Within these scenes, much focus was given to Archer's cooperative and fluid transition from one enemy to the next while aiding his black-haired partner, who did the same as Archer. The two looked like rivals in a sense that there was this spark of challenge between them.

That idea came crashing down like a building scheduled for demolition.

Archer and this friend of his were at a waterfall away from the other. They were on opposite ends of the waterfall, and positioned themselves at the base of what seems to be the foot of a statue. Archer's friend looked like a monster; the boy grew grew hand-like wings, and his skin looked similar to ash. Archer himself emulated a beast. He was wrapped in a red aura taking the form of a fox. Archer's eyes were blood red and slitted like an animal's, and it unnerved Shirou that this may have been the thing that Archer talked about that made him a possible Berserker candidate.

Both boys created an attack that originated and stayed at their palms. For Archer friend, black lighting enveloped his left arm in such terrifying fashion that Shirou seemed to feel the stray electric bolts hit his skin. Archer created that strange orb in his right hand, and the blue hue it took merged together with the red aura, combining its menacing power to enhance the attack. It was then and there that Shirou knew the two were trying to kill each other.

When they jumped and met at the center of the waterfall, his vision turned to black.

Shirou now dreamed of a sewer with a cage at the end of the tunnel. He felt a demonic presence beyond the towering bars, and assumed it to be the Kyuubi sealed into his Servant. If so, then he realized he might be inside his Servant's psyche. Just in front of the pitch black cage's insides, Archer, as a young boy in an orange jumpsuit, stood irritated at the thing behind bars. He was with an old man who floated over the ground. The man motioned his hands, and controlled nine artifacts to place them in specified areas of what Shirou noticed to be a summoning circle. Archer uttered the words for the summoning chant, effectively shocking Shirou.

'So this is the moment Archer received his title as a Master.' Shirou thought to himself.

After the bright light that emerged during the summoning dispersed, Shirou noticed two more Servants he hadn't seen before. A woman cloaked in a midnight cloak hid her face underneath her hood, whereas the other could be visibly seen as a Knight. The Emiya Master noticed this new Knight wore the visor Archer held so affectionately in that previous vision.

Suddenly, images of Archer's progress invaded Shirou's mind. The young boy practiced with a Shinai then turned into the orange Knight wielding Rin's Saber's sword. Then the same boy mimicked the red-clad man's pose along with the Yin and Yang swords. He twirled a red lance at dangerous speeds with Lancer's approval. Then the Knight became a gunslinger using twin, white, long-barreled pistols with red handle grips. The scene changed to a crater-filled landscape, where in the middle of it all, Archer held several sealing tags, and the fox girl Shirou saw jumped ecstatically. Archer swiftly assassinated a large underground crime ring under a minute. Next, Shirou witnessed a live version of chess with Archer's clones as the pieces; Archer commanded his troops against a Black Knight, and what seemed to be a normal chess game turned into a battle of wits and tactics fitting for a true battlefield littered with terrain and traps set up by each player. Next, he saw Archer launching himself towards the scantily-clad Sakura look-alike by attacking with a flaming jump kick, which screamed as 'DYNAMIC!' to Shirou. And finally he saw Archer commanding an army together with a redhead wearing a sandy gourd on his back. But before the visions subsided, he saw Archer and his Servants faced a force of a million weapons raining down on them.

Before he felt the feeling of waking up, Shirou analyzed a vital thing about Archer's progress. With each change of scene, Archer's bright smile of naivety slowly turned to a somber grin and lacked the brightness and passion in his younger version. Whatever allowed him to return to his younger persona must have been quite effective, Shirou inferred.

"Damn you, Caster!" Archer grumbled as he jumped rooftops together with Saber to reach Ryuudo temple. "Damn you to hell!" His reason for this bout of anger and hate was because of Caster's almost unending supply of golems halting progress. They were easy to kill, but they came in such numbers that even his clones would take some time to kill them off. Also, if he added his clones, Naruto was sure that the Emiya residence wouldn't be the same. Most likely, he would make his Master's home a giant, smoking hole in the ground.

"Enough prattling, Naruto!" Saber commanded of her fellow Servant, "You've tried your best, and it wasn't enough. Stop mulling over an insignificant thing such as this!" Naruto would have barked back out of frustration, but they were stopped by Rider, who stood on a roof fence with elegant balance befitting her beauty. The two stopped immediately to answer this new threat.

"Good evening, Archer and Saber." She greeted hollowly. She had a frown upon her face that clearly showed her disappointment. Archer didn't express any emotion, and tried to hide his nervousness of being found out. "So the rumor about the eighth Servant is true… You had me convinced, Archer, you really did." She leaped off the fence, and landed in front of the two Knight-class Servants. Archer noticed it before, but Rider's tasteful tight midnight dress accented the highlights given by the moonlight. Specular highlights curved to her body's alluring shape, and he caught himself ogling at her. Rider moved her hands to her neck and swung it back to fix her long, gorgeous hair that reminded him of his teammate's hair.

"What do you want, Rider?" Saber questioned. "We've a captured Master to retrieve."

"You may leave if you wish to save your Master, Saber. However…" She pointed to Archer, "I must have a discussion with this ruffian of an Archer." Saber readied her sword. She dare insult her surrogate brother like so! But…she had to admit he was a ruffian. However, that didn't mean she would allow this Servant to overstep her bounds. Her grip on Excalibur tightened, and Invisible Air contorted in response to her rising anger.

Archer placed his hand on Saber's breastplate, and held her back. "That's enough, Saber-nee. I can handle this. Besides, you need some alone time with Master." He sneered at Saber, before pushing her off the building. He didn't need to hear her protests at the moment, and so he did it. Saber, incapable of speaking her mind at that moment, just let herself fall, as Archer chucked a three-pronged Kunai in the air in the general area of Mount Enzo. When she hit ground, she realized she had to punish her brazen little brother for making fun of her; she jumped up full force. At the apex of her jump she saw Archer waving to her with his cheeky smile. The waving hand showed its back as it snapped its fingers.

Her scenery rapidly changed. In a flash of yellow, she lost sight of Archer and Rider, and saw herself to be positioned at the base of the mountain. While she was glad that Archer gave her a great big push to get to their Master, she became infuriated at him for sending her to where all hell would break loose.

Right where all the golems were stationed: at the base of the mountain.

"Damn you…Naruto!"

"So? You've something to discuss with me?" Archer asked his enemy Servant. "How about I take you to dinner while I'm at it? My stomach's killing me." Rider feigned indifference, but she was quite impressed Archer made quick work in defusing the serious atmosphere she created. It takes incredible skill to simply pass off the hidden, idle threat; either he's a genius, or a mad moron. "You must think I'm a genius or a mad moron, right?" Busted. "Don't worry. You'd be surprised how the two things come up in the same context. But to answer your question, I'm an insane genius."

"I've no time for your jokes, Archer. Tell me, why do you know my identity and my true Master?"

"Like I said, have dinner with me, and I'll tell you what I can."

"Do you have the luxury of time to woo me, Archer?" Rider sultrily questioned. "Don't you have a Master to save?"

Archer shrugged, "But you won't let me pass, Rider. So why not indulge you in your endeavor to decipher who I am and what I know?"

"Then what of your duplication ability?" She asked the overly relaxed Archer.

"You're quite slow on the uptake, I see."

"How rude." Rider monotonously commented. "Twas but a simple question." she crossed her arms, "So then what? Am I talking to the original?" She received a curt bow from the eccentric Archer. She raised an eyebrow underneath her mask, but she knew Archer had some form of knowing what she expressed.

"It would be quite rude to blow off a beauty like you." Archer replied, still retaining his bow. "After all getting angry or stressed gives you wrinkles." Rider sighed. So this Heroic Spirit is an incorrigible flirt. "Besides, he needs to get off his training wheels."

"You want him to die?"

"Heavens no." Archer answered in shock. "I want him to learn how to master his new skill. I've been taught that pain, and the threat of death works wonders on the drive and muscle response of a person's body when in preservation mode." He showed off Kanshou and Bakuya, and continued, "The act of creating weapons out of Prana…his only, most noteworthy skill as of yet… I'll force him to Master it. I was planning to get there and wait things out until he can't handle Caster any longer."

"You're quite the anomaly, Archer. A Servant that wants to see his Master suffer, you are one strange Servant."

Archer looked to his right, and leaned on a ledge. His eyes looked ever distant as if his eyes were staring into the past. In a low voice, he said, "Hah…it's been a long time since I've been called that. Anomaly..." He repeated the words in a trance-like state. The word seemed to trigger a memory, and Rider looked dumbfounded at Archer's blatant change of subject.

"I've no time for this, Archer. Answer my question!" Rider demanded, "How do you know who I am?"

"I am a Heroic Spirit of the future, summoned by Shirou Emiya, my Servant Archer in my lifetime." Archer spoke cheerily. "I am a Heroic Spirit charged with one goal that I won't disclose to you. All you need to know is that my knowledge stems from my current Master. Okay?" Archer's reminiscing face turned back into his usual grin. "A man of my caliber has to have secrets that I can't share without my trust."

"You continually serenade me, and you say that I'm not trustworthy? What a heartbreaker you are."

A strange feeling tugged at Archer's whole body. He adjusted his gaze to the mountain, and felt the tugging sensation grow stronger. The tugging feeling almost resembled a reverse summoning. "Hm? Now what?"

"What is it?"

"It seems our dinner will have to wait, Medusa." Archer said. "My Master is calling me. It seems he's finally had enough."

"…"

"Naruto." Archer said without facing her, "Name's Naruto Namikaze, or Uzumaki. Pick whichever you prefer." Rider stepped back; her enemy just revealed his identity on a whim! What- "You're thinking I'm foolish and mad again, right?" He puffed a bit of air as if he was laughing. "Nevermind. Still, am I not of right mind to compliment a woman with beauty like yours? Even if those eyes of yours are hidden by that mask, I will not hesitate to say you're stunning." Rider kept silent. "Your body gives off this appearance of a goddess underneath the moon's gentle rays. And like any treasure hunter, I desire to look at those mysterious eyes even if only for a moment because it is those hidden away that are the greatest of treasures."

Rider furrowed her eyebrows. "Foolish ruffian, you know what my ees are capable of. Do you not know the consequences?" she rhetorically asked. "Are you that confident that you would be able to resist the curse my eyes have?" Archer nodded. "And you would reveal your identity. You imbecile!" Rider's stoic persona breaks, and replacing it was anger. "Your identity holds more value than that of your secretive goal that I do not wish to discover or indulge in!"

"I do know the consequences quite well, Rider. And like any treasure, the greater the danger, the better the treasure at the end." Archer confidently answered. "Also, it would be rude to know a woman's name, and her not know mine." Archer argued. He then continued to speak more about identities, "Ah, right...knowledge holds power in the War, but riddle me this, Rider: What strategy can you devise, if I'm not even born?" He promptly disappeared, answering his Master's call, and left the angered and confused Rider alone on the roof. He withheld insignificant information from her, and instead revealed his identity instead. She turned to Mount Enzo while clenching her fists; she became determined to break the puzzle that is Archer.

To Archer, his motives were confusing, even for him, but he at least knew for certain…

The next time they meet, one of them may die, and it left a somber feeling in his heart as he neared his destination.

Shirou stirred awake, and felt himself standing rather than lying on his bed. Moreover, he noticed the place he woke up in was far from his actual house. He knew he himself was a the gates of Ryuudo Temple. Question is…how did he get here?

"Good evening, Archer's Master." A feminine voice spoke from deep within the temple's courtyard. She appeared in black mist, a woman in a dark violet hooded garb. Her hood covered most of her face, but it didn't hide her indigo locks from Shirou's sight. She looked harmless to Shirou; however, he knew to stray away from that thinking quickly. Her presence screamed enemy to the Master. She introduced herself, "I am Caster, and I'd like to take your Command Spells. Would you kindly relinquish them?" Shirou knew to not respond to this Servant. Her choice words, portraying a humongous euphemism, put the teen on edge. He could only conclude that he was brought here out of Archer and Saber's reach.

"I kind of like my Servant, Caster." Shirou replied, almost adding an extra 'S' to the Servant. He mentally sighed at his quick save. "So no, I don't want to give it up." And he slapped himself inside his mind because he sounded a bit like Archer when he said that bit.

Caster scoffed, "You talk as if you have a choice, impudent Magus." She created a staff in her left hand. On top of it looked to be some sort of astral image that Shirou failed to recognize or don't know at all. She swung the staff, and her cloak opened up. Shirou felt the mana come forth like a wall. Purple, glowing magic circles the size of a serving dish appeared around the Servant, and like a cornered rat, Shirou charged at the woman. He utilized his newfound skill and projected his favorite pair of swords into his grasp while reinforcing his body and his weapons. He stepped with a heavy foot, and blasted himself at unfamiliar speeds to interrupt this crazy Servant.

The magic circles fired purple, electric beams of volatile mana, which were aimed towards Shirou's previous position. Light streaked beside him, yet one seemed to aim true, forcing the young man to deflect the beam with his imperfect creation. Light bent at an unnatural angle, making the attack useless.

"Strange Magecraft you have there, Archer's Master." Caster commented. "For a flawed creation to be able to resist the power of my attack is something to note. Your life's value just increased, boy!" Despite what she said, she shot another volley of beams at Shirou, who couldn't move away in time.

Shirou swiped his weapons at the attacks, deflecting all of them, yet not leaving his only form of offense and defense unscathed from his constant deflections. "I'm flattered, but I don't think our partnership would last very lon- Gah!" One stray bolt struck the ground in front of him, launching the young man at the steps in front of the temple. The young man rolled down the rocky steps, bumping his head several times on the way down to the first platform nearest to the gates. Shirou got up with slight difficulty, his panting breaths showed his level of fatigue after a such a short bout. He willed his legs to move, yet his actions were restrained by strings.

He yelled at the top of his lungs when the young man was unceremoniously chucked upwards and towards the temple's doors. Shirou's body hit with a heavy thud, his bones fracturing, some even breaking at impact. The pain shot all over his weak body. The excruciating agony numbed all sense of rational thought and movement. Guttural bellows of agony amused the Servant greatly.

"You put up a decent fight, young man. I see your earnest heart is full of naivety, a shame one such as young as you clings to a childish ideal." Shirou's throbbing pain withered when he heard the woman mock his ideals. "Blind beliefs like yours are befitting those of a child's. You best learn to mature, young man." She chuckled lowly, "However, your life isn't in Tyche's favor."

His body shook, defying his mental decree to move. He needed to take revenge on this woman who mocked his ideals, therefore mocking himself! He wouldn't allow this woman to kill him! In rhythmic, shaky movements, Shirou managed to face the woman with his bottom touching the ground, allowing him to sit.

Caster decided she'd seen enough of the boy's struggle, and decided to end it. She fired one beam directly aiming for Shirou's torso. Reflexively, Shirou retraced his swords, and blocked the beam by crossing one sword over the other in front of his chest. The beam, far stronger than the other ones preceding this one, shattered the blades in an instant. Metal shards flew outwards, and select few impaled themselves inside Shirou's shoulders, upper arms, and ribs. The explosive force pushed the boy to the temple's wooden steps, hitting his spine. He groaned at the physical torture his body endured. How long would this last?

Where was Archer or Saber?

He felt the strings wrap around his appendages, rendering him immobile. He felt as if he was stuck in a spider's web with how useless he felt being stuck in this unfavorable position. The best he could do was move his head, and that wasn't saying much. Caster seemed to take in Shirou's vulnerable state as a welcome to make fun of the boy. She fired off beams the boy could easily evade with the swivel of his head, and she even went as far as making him almost lose his manhood.

"This is the most interesting time I've ever had when it came to torturing men!" Caster declared happily, "It's been fun, but I must have your Command Spells." She reached out to touch Shirou's left hand; the gesture allowed her to forcibly extract the marking in the least pleasurable fashion. To Shirou, it felt as if his hand was about to dislodge from its joint, and all he could do to prevent this from happening is to scream in incoherent screams of help.

"A-Ar…ARCHER!" Shirou desperately called.

Fate Stay Night OST- Kodoku na Junrei

His Command Spells shined in the night's dark embrace, and the air trembled in the space before the boy. Wind gouged the ground, curling as the wind turned into a mini vortex that created a powerful singularity, which attracted small objects to the wall of wind. The pillar of wind curved into a sphere, unraveling what it contained like a theater curtain introducing its mysterious protagonist; Archer was shown kneeling with his left knee meeting ground, and his right hand in a fist, placed right over his heart. His eyes were shut, giving him this distinct appearance of a slumbering lion, undisturbed in its peaceful slumber.

Shirou felt the strings that hindered him slack upon Archer's arrival. He knew Archer cut it because he heard, despite the howling winds, that specific swish made by a high-speed slash of a sword. Once his motor functions were decent, Shirou steadily rose himself from his defeated pose.

Archer, still not moving from his initial pose, uncharacteristically stayed silent. He then takes a step to push himself out of the kneeling position. His metal boots clinked with each extra step he took to stand properly. He gazed upwards, and allowed Caster to see a momentary glimpse of Archer's whiskered face and glassy, tranquil, blue eyes before it became hidden by Archer's visor.

"I ask-" Archer said pensively, "Are you the one who kidnapped my Master?" Shirou stiffened at Archer's tone of voice. The man didn't show any hint of humor, nor did he wish to indulge in it. His voice sounded Knightly, full of regal accents and predominance within his words. Caster stepped back; Archer's honed finesse struck her, however, there was this strange, familiar feeling that she recognized, yet couldn't describe in words.

This Archer acted a bit too much of a Knight in Caster's eyes. While Archer is a part of the three Knight classes, Caster thought that from what she'd witnessed of Archer's puzzling personality that he of all people would never act this serious. Her calculative eyes stared deeply into Archer's own; the desire to unravel this enigma intensified as Archer spoke again.

"I ask again," The volume of Archer's voice rose, emphasizing his question, "are you the Servant who kidnapped my Master?" Archer continued this charade, if only to entertain himself. He knew this Servant's identity, yet chose to play around with it to give Caster discord within her mind for what he would do later.

"And if I am?" Caster asked in return, "What would you do to me, Archer?"

"We are enemies." Archer answered simply, "If you are not the one, then I still need to kill you because you are an enemy Servant, a threat to my Master's safety."

Omake: Lancer's school of Flirting

There came a time when the incorrigible flirt was once an innocent boy when it came to charming women. This is the first time he was pushed to learn how to use his charms.

Does he prevail or fail?

The sands of time reverse to show us a fragment of Archer's life.

"Okay! First lesson in flirting is to be confident while being yourself."

"So...basically like what I do the whole time?" Naruto asked while raising an eyebrow. "That's lesson number one? I thought there would be some revolutionary technique. I don't even know why you're doing this and why I'm letting you do this." Naruto crossed his arms to show his irritation of not being able to train for the day because of this.

"Come on now, Anfa." Lancer whined. "You got the looks; it'll be a shame to not use it to charm any woman ith it. I mean seriously, you lost all that baby fat, and now you're all chiseled muscles." Lancer patted the pouting boy on the back. "Here, I'll show you." Lancer walked to the street and intentionally bumped into a moderately beautiful woman.

The woman had waist-length purple hair cut in a hime style. At the back, she had tie to partially keep her hair in place. Her eyes were maroon orbs that shone like gems, and an angular face that made her seem to be in her twenties. She wore a white haori and a pair of purple hakamas and wooden shoes.

"Apologies fair lady, I didn't see you there." Lancer said to the woman.

"It's all right, spearman." The lady answered. "Might you be a mercenary? You don't seem to be affiliated with any of the Shinobi villages."

"Aye, madam. I'm currently looking for a job, but I seem to have been distracted just gazing into those glorious eyes of yours."

"Oh?" The lady asked. "My, my...hold bold of you to flirt with a married woman." She said menacingly while exuding an aura of death. Behind her, a hanya mask seemed to appear like a genjutsu, and slightly terrorized Lancer. Quickly, Lancer composed himself.

"Oh..." He said meekly before bowing. "I humbly apologize. Since you looked so young, I th-"

"So you flirted on me because I looked young huh?" The hanya mask roared, and made Lancer scurry backwards, and amusing Naruto greatly.

"Again, I apologize ma'am." Lancer bowed furiously while backing away with each bow.

"Wow...I learned so much from that. Great example, Sensei." Naruto sarcastically said to the blue-clad man. From inside Naruto's head, Archer snickered at how much he's influenced the boy with using sarcasm.

"If you want to get snappy at me, why don't you try it? This time compliment her; make her feel appreciated for being there."

"Fine..." Naruto strolled into the street and started off the same way as Lancer. He bumped into a girl, one he was familiar with. Blonde with bangs up front and four ponytails tied at the back, teal, pupil-less eyes stared at him. She wore a long-sleeved purple blouse underneath a thin, gray breastplate. In the middle of it, a red obi wrapped around her waist and was tied at the back with two ridiculously long tails flowing behind her. She wore a dark, navy blue skirt with slits at the sides. On her left leg, she had a fishnet pant stop just above her knee and a fishnet sock on her right leg. On her neck, a Hidden Sand village headband rested firmly. "Eh? Temari-chan?"

"Naruto? What are you doing here?"

"Pervy sage and I are taking a stop here." Naruto replied. "What are you doing here?"

"A mission." She answered simply. "Gaara and Kankuro are here too, but they're resting at a nearby inn."

"Really?" He asked with a excited jump. "Woot! So are they doing fine?"

"Yeah."

"What about you? A desert flower like you shouldn't bloom alone. What would your brothers think if they saw you here all alone to wilt in loneliness? This won't do, how about I come with you?"

Temari narrowed her eyes, "Are you hitting on me? I never pegged you for a flirt, Naruto. Certainly an unexpected change. I guess being around the Perverted Sage has corrupted you."

"Not really." He answered. "I haven't had the urge to peek at women in baths yet. So I'm fully sure I'm not 'corrupted' as you say I am." Naruto definitely knew he wasn't corrupted; he'd kill himself first than to lower himself to the Sannin's level. "But back to you, you sure do look far more prettier than before. I can't explain it but you look more...how to say...um...glamorous?"

"You are hitting on me!" Temari exclaimed. "Oh this is gold! The orange knucklehead is learning to flirt! Wait till Gaara hears this! Haha!" She laughed enough to almost fracture Naruto's ego. "So you want to go with me, huh? I can handle myself you know. I'm not some helpless damsel that needs an escort."

"Hm? A lone foreign Kunoichi without her teammates is a target for spies. I'm actually concerned for you. " Naruto answered truthfully."I can't worry over someone I care about?" 'Crap. I worded that wrong, didn't I?' He mentally pummeled himself for his vague wording, and saw the consequences of his mistake.

Temari's demeanor quickly changed. Gone was her default expression to be replaced by something else quite alarming for the boy. "You care for me?" She asked with a small blush.

Hearing the question, Naruto panicked, "Eh! Ah...um...that's not-" 'Way to go, Naruto.'

"Are...you saying that you don't?" Temari asked sadly.

"Ah! N-not in that way! I-I!"

'Eh~. Master's a natural at screwing up. He was doing so well too.'

"I-I care about you!" Naruto confessed, "Just not in the romantic sense."

"Oh..." She said with a downcast look on her. She lowered her gaze to the ground, and left Naruto scratching his head in guilt. "I see. Well I guess I'll see you next time." She turned around and walked at a sluggish pace. She soon melted into the crowd. Naruto was left standing like a statue.

"Well, Master? Are you going to get her?" He asked the stunned young man. "A gentleman does not leave a woman in tears."

"..."

"Are you going after her?"

"...That is a lesson I can learn, Lancer-nii." He ran into the crowd to search for Temari to clean his heart full of guilt.

Yeah…I'm ending it here. Sorry, but it's another cliffy. Night 3 has too many things going on for my liking, and it has to be spread out to be manageable and readable. 9.5K+ words is more than enough, right?

Update: I hope this is a nice update. Added an omake and extra details that hopefully fixes the problem with the Lancer fight. Also if I didn't make it cheesy enough before, I hope I just did with this update.

Anyways, review, follow, favorite, I don't care.

This is Azure, signing off.