Max and Kate were back at their table. Each of them had their hands on their tea cups, but the conversation had halted before it even started. Honestly, Kate just wasn't herself. She had dark bags under her eyes, still puffy. Her hair looked unclean. Not only that, but she had that exhausted look Max used to wear. They obviously
Placing her picture on the table, Max asked, "What do you think?"
Kate's eyes flickered. Then she looked down at it and picked it up. "What's this for?"
"I was thinking about submitting it for the 'Everyday Heroes' contest," Max confessed. She hoped this conversation might distract Kate for a moment from her own problems. "But I'm not so certain."
"I think it's lovely, Max," Kate replied, a sad smile pulling at her cheeks. She passed it back. "You should submit it."
Max looked down at it again, still not feeling so certain. "Have you submitted a photo yet?"
"Yeah," Kate replied. "I submitted a week ago, I think?"
"What was your subject?" Max inquired.
Sighing, Kate took a long sip of tea. She set her cup back down carefully. "I captured a picture of a firefighter handing a child back to his grandmother and mother. At the time, I really felt like I had caught a true 'Everyday Hero.' Now, though, it just seems cliche."
"I don't think it's cliche," Max comforted, rubbing at the lip of her cup. She hadn't expected this to be so difficult. "Police officers, EMTs, firefighters… they're all heroes."
Kate nodded minutely before looking out of the window. "I know I might not seem it, but I do feel blessed that you invited me to tea," she admitted.
"Sometimes, what we need the most is just a friend who will listen without judgement," Max replied. She then laughed. "And other times, we just need to not talk about what's bothering us."
Taking another drink, Kate noted, "We never really got into what happened to you, did we?"
"I wasn't ready to talk about it back then," Max said honestly. "And if you're not ready now, I understand. But if you ever want to talk about it, I'm just a call or text away."
"Thanks, Max, but I'm pretty sure you already have seen enough," Kate answered bitterly, looking out the window. She took another drink and frowned. Already, Max missed her bubbly nature and cheerful smile. "The whole school has already seen everything. And so has my family. And my church."
Heart sinking, Max felt awful. She had considered Kate religious, but Kate was still willing to go out with the Vortex Club. Her family, on the other hand, was probably even more conservative. Especially since her father was a preacher. There couldn't have been anything more humiliating for Kate than to have that exposed.
"Kate, I am so sorry, but you have nothing to be ashamed of," Max pointed out earnestly.
Kate shook her head. "Max, that wasn't me."
Misunderstanding, Max said, "I know it's unlike you, Kate-"
"No, you don't understand! That wasn't me," Kate reiterated, as though it would make more sense the second time than it did the first. "I don't do things like that."
Well, you obviously did that night.
Max didn't say that. She didn't even let the thought flash across her face. Instead, she knitted her brow with concern. Kate needed her support right now, after all. She already was getting judgement from everywhere else. "Kate, we're all human. We all want to try new things, and we sometimes have regrets."
"You just don't get it. Just like everyone else doesn't get it," Kate snapped back before rising to her feet. Max went to get up as well, but Kate held up her hand. "Thanks for the tea, Max, but I just want to be alone for a while. See you tomorrow."
"Kate, wait!" Distressed, Max watched Kate hurry out of the tea shop without looking back. She sank back into her seat, staring at her half-empty cup. First, Chloe; now, Kate.
You'd think after 18 years, I'd have figured out how to be a good friend.
But Max always lost contact with people. When she moved to Seattle, she lost all contact with Arcadia Bay. Now, moving back to Arcadia Bay, she lost contact with all of her friends back in Seattle. Her mother would chalk it up to being "out of sight, out of mind." Truthfully, though, Max was just scared to find out how people were doing without her. She worried more that they didn't miss her. That they had already moved on. That they had already found new friends. That they didn't even think of her anymore.
It was a bit of a Catch-22. Or was it called a Devil's Circle? Max couldn't recall anymore. But she understood the irony. And she could rationalize her fear, and how it tied into her many photographs. But it never changed anything. Max remained just as reclusive, aloof, and shy as she always had been. And she was certain that when she left Arcadia Bay for university, the same thing would happen again with all the friends she was making here. Which included Chloe.
It's probably better this way.
A cruel thought that made Max's heart twist. As much as she thought about her best friend and wanted to reach out to her, Max doubted she would ever be able to bring herself to do it. Five years wasn't exactly a small period of time. No doubt that Max couldn't just saunter into Chloe's life again, expecting everything to be the same. And she wasn't sure that she could cope with the differences. Would Chloe still be just Chloe? Or was she different after her dad passed away? Given how close they were, Chloe couldn't have remained entirely unaffected.
Finishing her tea, Max stared at her phone. She knew she should send Kate a text, but she didn't want to come off as overbearing and intrusive. After all, Kate had been asked to be left alone. Max, who had already done enough damage for one day, was more than happy to respect that request. Slowly, she rose to her feet and gave the shop owner a friendly wave before stepping out.
Cold air nipped at her exposed flesh, and she tucked her hands into her jacket pockets. Autumn had finally set in for a day. Max usually loved the crispness of the Oregon air in early October. It reminded her of new beginnings and was the first taste of winter. But now, she was just left with the sense of how how bitingly bitter it was. She almost shuffled back into the tea shop to take refuge from it. But instead, she trotted on down to the empty bus stop.
Staring at the street, Max waited a few minutes. The bus was nowhere to be seen, though, and she started to walk. Her footfalls fell hollow on the concrete as she pushed by the old buildings that hadn't changed since her youth. Head down, she put earbuds in and turned on her music. Her walking became a rhythm. She checked both directions before crossing the road.
Max walked and walked, her legs not tiring. Her mind remained fixated on each passing song. Whenever she started to think again, she would hum along with the music. Right now, she just needed to get away. The concrete sidewalk gave way to a natural dirt path. Blotches of yellows, oranges, and reds sprinkled across the path. Wanting to see how far out she was, Max looked up. A doe stood before her, grazing on some foliage just off the path. Freezing, Max breathed out slowly.
She slowly reached for her camera. Max didn't want to startle the deer before she could get her shot. Bringing it up, she snapped a picture. The flash went off, spooking the doe into fleeing. But Max had her shot. She took the film and waved it a few times. Without checking it, she slipped it into her journal for safekeeping.
The incline required a bit more effort. Max stretched her legs to compensate. Breathing harder, she noticed that she was getting closer. The music she was listening to swelled. It was as if it was playing for her journey upwards. Reaching the top, Max looked up at the lighthouse. She loved it - the beacon for Arcadia Bay. It was one thing that she knew would stand the test of time.
Reaching the top, Max gazed out. The sun was low in the sky, but there was still plenty of daylight left. The light sparkled against the calm waves, lapping at the shoreline. Wind rustled through the leaves, and Max watched several spiral down towards the water. Autumn really was the most beautiful season. Spring was pretty but overrated and oftentimes took too long to set in. Luckily, summers were pretty mild in Oregon, so they could serve as a surrogate spring.
Max sat down on the bench. Pulling her jacket closer, she checked the bench. It was hardly ever used, sturdy. There was a fine layer of dirt, but nothing too disconcerting. Max brushed off what she could before laying down. The sky, treetops, and lighthouse filled her vision. Only a few wisps of clouds filtered out the sunlight. Turning down her music, Max listened as the soothing guitar melody plucked through over the sound of the nature around her.
Closing her eyes, Max let out a deep, cleansing breath. This is what she needed. To get away from everyone. To leave every single worry and concern behind her, even if it was just for a few hours. No responsibilities. No failures. Max was, at that moment, just an 18-year-old girl. Somewhere between adulthood and childhood. Between escaping and being confined. Letting out another deep sigh, she relaxed against the bench. The sunshine was arm against her skin and heated up her jacket and jeans perfectly. The soft music lulled her into relaxing.
A soft murmuring filtered through her earbuds. Stirring, Max let out a shuddering breath. Then she felt her upper torso shake. For a moment, she ignored it, wanting nothing more than to rest a bit longer. But when she felt another shake, she opened her eyes. It was nighttime, a bright half-moon shining overhead along with clusters of stars. However, she still came face-to-face with a pair of glasses and trimmed beard.
Mr. Jefferson?
"Max, talk to me," Mr. Jefferson pressed, his eyebrows drawing up in concern.
Shooting up, Max shivered and felt her body protest the moments. She fumbled to pull the earbuds from her ears, her fingers numb. Her teeth chattered as she asked, "Wh-why are you here?"
"Principal Wells called me to report that you were missing from your dorm room," Mr. Jefferson explained as he took off his suit jacket. "He wanted to know if I might know where you went."
"And h-how did you find me?" Max asked as Mr. Jefferson wrapped it around her. Shivering, she pulled it closer to her. His heat lingered in it, immediately warming her against the cold night.
Mr. Jefferson chuckled. "You told me."
"I-I did?" Max asked. She hugged herself tightly in the jacket, trying to warm herself.
"You told me that this is where you go when you wanted to be alone," Mr. Jefferson responded. He cupped her cheek, his hand scalding against her skin. "You're freezing. Come on, let's get you warmed up."
It was that moment - that touch - that brought Max back. She remembered with searing accuracy what Victoria had told her earlier that week. Without thinking, she pulled her face away from his touch. Mr. Jefferson recoiled in surprise, as if Max had bit him. She pulled off the jacket and rose to her feet in one swift movement. Mr. Jefferson stood with her. Pressing it into his hands, Max managed to say, "Thank you for finding me, Mr. Jefferson. I'll head back to school."
"Whoa, Max," Mr. Jefferson responded, pushing the jacket back towards her. "Do you honestly believe I am going to let you walk back in the state you're in? Come on. I'll drive you back."
Max set her jaw to keep it from chattering any more. "You shouldn't be wasting your time on me, Mr. Jefferson."
"I'm not," he responded, his voice sharp and decisive. He locked Max with a hard gaze. "Why you continue to think you are a waste of time, I will never understand. Now come along. The car's still running."
Max felt her resolve starting to break. She was numb, and she couldn't keep herself from shivering. Pulling his jacket back close, she lowered her head and silently descended. Mr. Jefferson relaxed upon seeing her concede and fell in step behind her. Neither of them spoke on the way down.
Quite frankly, Max didn't know what to say. She had avoided Mr. Jefferson in every way she could, from taking long detours to avoid walking past his classroom to not participating in class. She couldn't meet his gaze, didn't raise her hand, and always bolted as soon as the bell rang. Mr. Jefferson tried to catch her a few times, but Victoria always intercepted him. Naturally, she didn't want her boyfriend chasing after someone else, whether he meant well or not.
Of course, this seemed to backfire. Mr. Jefferson started calling on Max more, forcing her to talk. He began to position himself in front of Daniel's desk, never blocking Daniel from sight but always remaining right in front of Max. And his eyes landed on her more times than not, it seemed. Victoria was getting louder in the course, starting to blurt out the answers instead of raising her hand to respond. Although she never said it, Max found every class more painful than the last. Every minute stretched on longer than the last.
Mr. Jefferson's car was running, just as he said, at the bottom of the hill. With headlights and hazard lights on, it hummed low, cutting through the otherwise silent night. Mr. Jefferson overtook her, opening the passenger side door for her. Max slid in, the door closing behind her, and was immediately engulfed in warmth. Even the seat was heated.
Talk about living in luxury.
Max nestled under the jacket, smelling Mr. Jefferson's cologne on it. Normally, it filled her with a sense of serenity. This time, though, she merely felt dread. She wasn't supposed to be here. He should be preoccupied with Victoria right now. Staring at her feet, she slumped back into the seat and felt the heat starting to sink into her bones. As soon as Mr. Jefferson sat in his seat, Max placed the jacket back on his lap. Mr. Jefferson stared at it a moment before tossing it into the back seat.
Starting up the car, he headed down the road. "I have to ask this, but… is everything alright?"
No, obviously, everything isn't alright.
"I just fell asleep by accident," Max explained, her voice barely audible over the engine. She fumbled with her phone, finding that it had been blown up with texts and calls. There were eight texts from Warren, one from Dana, two from Kate, and several missed calls from the school. Nothing from her parents, though.
Thank God.
Principal Wells probably thought it was best not to start a panic with the parents if it could be avoided. For the first time, she appreciated his determination to maintain the school's reputation.
Mr. Jefferson replied, "Principal Wells told me you had tea with Kate. She said she left before you. Did she say something to you?"
"No, Kate didn't do anything wrong," Max replied, her voice a bit stronger this time. She typed out a quick "I'm alive" text to Warren to stop any further onslaught.
Sighing, Mr. Jefferson pressed, "Max, I just want to help you."
"There's nothing to help," Max all but snapped back. Why did he have to keep up this charade? Wasn't it enough to pick her up and bring her back to school? That alone would make him an "everyday hero" in the eyes of the administration. And enough to probably make Victoria upset with him. "Like I said, I fell asleep by accident. I was just chilling, listening to my music. Then I was zonked."
"Zonked?" Mr. Jefferson echoed.
"Asleep," Max clarified.
Shaking his head, Mr. Jefferson chuckled. "And here I thought I was still trendy and hip."
You are.
But Max couldn't say that. Or, to be more accurate, she wouldn't. She just wanted to be out of his car already, feeling suffocated. Luckily, she could see Blackwell Academy in the distance. "Does Principal Wells know you found me?"
"No. Principal Wells doesn't do text messaging, so I figured I would give him a call once you were back in your room," Mr. Jefferson informed her. He turned into the parking lot. "Max, you should take a warm shower once you get in. Not a hot shower because that might send your body into shock. But you need to warm up your core. I'm worried-"
"I get it," Max cut in. Every word he said was like another slice into her heart. She couldn't contain her pain, tears prickling her eyes again. Why couldn't he just leave her alone? "Mr. Jefferson, no offense, but you're not my dad."
"I am aware that I am not. But that doesn't mean I cannot care about your wellbeing," Mr. Jefferson pressed. He reached towards her before pulling back just before he touched her again. Max recalled the last time he did that. "Max, talk to me."
Max stared out of the front windshield as the car came to a halt. "I think enough's been said." With that, she burst from the car. She felt her jacket snag on something for but a moment, but she slipped away without any issue. Closing the door behind her, she hurried across the parking lot. The cold air immediately assaulted her again as she started to jog. Principal Wells' house lights were on. Hopefully, Mr. Jefferson was calling him to let him know that Max was safe.
Bustling into the dormitory, Max headed up the stairs. She was going to take that warm shower, if only because it would ensure she would be left alone just a while longer. As she trekked down the hall, she noticed Kate's board was defaced with the words: "World Tongue Record Holder!" Max took a moment, erasing it with her jacket sleeve, and drew a heart in its place.
And for a moment, Max didn't feel entirely hopeless when it came to being a friend.