A Rose Watered with Vinegar

Chapter 7

oOoOoOo

He woke to the sound of his comm buzzing incessantly on his night stand. Rubbing his eyes with a curse, he rolled over and grabbed it. He squinted to make out the letters on the small screen.

Cronus.

He answered immediately. "What is it, Cronus?" It was almost a slur the sleep was so heavy in his voice.

His compatriot's thin voice was almost jarring. "I apologize for disturbing you so late, my lord. But it's urgent. We've received another message."

Kylo shot up as if propelled by a springboard. "Pallas?"

"Yes, my lord."

"I'll be there right away."

He switched off the comm and tossed it haphazardly onto the bed as he jumped out. He dressed with vigor, not bothering to check if he even tucked his tunic in smoothly. He threw on his robes and all but bolted from the room, pulling the mask over his face as he strode down the hall.

Rounding a corner, he nearly bowled directly into the back of some gigantic form.

"Evening, Master," greeted the offending Hyperion as he slowed to walk beside him. "Or should I say morning? I assume we're headed to the same place."

Kylo nodded. "I wonder what that bastard has to say this time."

"I'm sure it can't be good," said Hyperion grimly.

When they arrived, they discovered Theia and Atlas had beaten them there, seated already. Cronus was in the corner, tinkering with the message terminal. His long fingers were striking away at the screen, and Kylo assumed he was attempting to do something with the message. He took off his mask and joined the others at the table, and Hyperion followed suit.

"What are you doing, Cronus?" he said.

The intelligencer did not turn from the screen. "Gleaning, my lord. The message is heavily encrypted. I'm trying to work past it, but the enciphering is good. He must have someone quite skilled in his company."

After a minute, Cronus emitted a rare curse and struck the terminal with the bottom of his fist.

"Bad news?" said Atlas.

"It's too strong," sighed Cronus. "This is coding I haven't ever dealt with before." Kylo took a quick breath. That wasn't good. Cronus was perhaps the most technologically adept individual he had ever met. He'd seen the man dismantle entire security systems with a jab of the finger. If he couldn't crack this, then it was fairly evident Pallas had more than just an old warship in his arsenal.

He heard footsteps behind him, and Kylo turned to find Ophion and Rhea spilling into the room. They removed their masks as they filled seats at the table.

Rhea regarded him coldly. Kylo looked away, willing the shame from his face.

"Miss anything important?" said Ophion to no one in particular, brushing the long platinum locks from his eyes.

"Not the worst of it," answered Kylo. "Cronus, do you have the message ready?"

"Yes, Master."

"Let's get it over with, then."

Cronus nodded and turned to tap away at the screen. Moments later, a staticky blue holo figure appeared in the room.

"Hello, Kylo," drawled Pallas from within his hood. Kylo set his jaw. "It was so good to see you the other day on Chandrila."

Kylo wasn't terribly surprised. He has figured the possibility of a Resistance lone wolf to be pretty slim, as they all were like brainless machines when it came to whatever the leadership said. Atlas had suggested in the immediate Council meeting following the attack that it could have been a cartel hit, blowback from the emancipation decree, but Kylo had pretty much ruled that out, too. Open defiance of the New Order in such a fashion wasn't really aligned with the way they operated. He was relieved, however, to know that it wasn't Hux. He knew the man was not long for betrayal, but he was glad it hadn't come so soon.

"Did you like my ship, Kylo?" He was torn back to the hooded hologram. "It's nice, isn't it? Some might say it's a little rough on the eyes, but I think it's a treasure. It flew in the time of the Old Empire. A time much better than now."

Theia growled. Pallas went on.

"You've probably wondered how I got the thing to fly. You see, Kylo, I've surpassed you. I don't need engines to fly ships; I fly with the Force. A nice trick, isn't it? Too bad you won't be able to learn it."

Anger burned in Kylo's gut. He had to admit, the deranged fool was pretty good at getting under his skin. He always had been, even during his time in the Knights.

"Yes, you will be gone soon. It was a shame Chandrila didn't go as planned. It's only going to be worse for you now. And the pathetic little weasels calling themselves 'the Resistance'. The clock is ticking, Kylo. The Sith are eager to follow Darth Cantarus into battle."

So, he was calling himself a Darth now? Kylo supposed he had to if he was legitimately attempting to revive the Sith. Pallas' commitment was deep, it seemed.

Pallas chuckled. "Well, I'll be seeing you soon. Goodbye, Kylo Ren."

And then the figure disappeared.

Kylo simply glared at the now-empty spot, before Ophion piped up.

"Darth Cantarus? You've got to be kidding me with this guy."

"He's vile," spat Theia.

"That he is, Theia," said Hyperion. He turned to Kylo. "What do you think, my lord?"

Kylo sighed. "Well, for one, we need to secure our comms. Either he's found a way to hack our system, or it came from the inside. We'll find out soon enough if Hux or anyone in his ilk are in cahoots with Pallas, but we have to have our messages locked down."

"I will tend to that right away, my lord," said Cronus with a bow of his head.

Kylo nodded. Rhea chimed in.

"His Force powers are...troubling, to say the least."

"Agreed," said Hyperion. "Flying a ship as Nihilus did is no small feat."

"Do you think he's become like him, my lord?" asked Atlas, looking to Kylo. "A wound in the Force?"

"I do not know," replied Kylo. "Wounds are typically only created via massive loss of life, but they can be generated from really any catastrophic event. Perhaps Pallas' Snoke-induced madness rendered him one."

"If he has become like Nihilus, that can be to our advantage," surmised Hyperion. "The Lord of Hunger was strong, yes, but that power was ultimately his downfall. He overreached, and it consumed him, as so many do with that kind of strength."

"Don't be a fool," said Rhea pointedly. "He has us right where he wants us. Any 'overreach' on his part would not include our destruction."

"A hasty assumption, Rhea," chided Cronus. "If we were truly under his blade, we'd have done battle with him by now. I'm beginning to think he's reliant on the information we send to the Resistance. If our messages aren't bugged, then surely there's are. That must be addressed."

"The Resistance recruits just about anyone," said Theia with scorn. "Lowlifes, barflies, indigents. If not the messages, how do we know there isn't a mole amongst them? Pallas could have easily infiltrated their ranks with that kind of open door policy."

"Worth looking into, Theia," said Kylo. She wasn't wrong; from what he knew, the Resistance typically recruited people who had nothing to lose and a lot to gain. A spy could have easily posed as a poor junk trader and won the sympathy vote into their group. Hell, there could be an entire underground cadre of them in the Resistance.

"We shouldn't even be working with them in the first place," groused Rhea. She crossed her arms. "They're still our enemies in the end, right? Now they're just making bigger headaches for us."

"I would think twice before questioning me, Rhea," growled Kylo. He wasn't going to let her get insolent after what happened outside the med bay. She needed to be professional. "The ceasefire stands and that is final."

"If we didn't have the stupid ceasefire, we wouldn't have risked our lives at that little meeting!"

The anger in his belly was boiling now, coursing hot into his veins.

"Rhea," he hissed. "I'd be careful if I were you."

"Afraid of a little criticism, my lord?"

He saw red. With a flick of his hand, he flung her across the room with the Force. She slammed into the wall with a thud. He rose like a summoned demon, the air growing thick and dark around him.

"I am not to be defied!" he roared. Electricity curled around his fingers as he approached her struggling shape. "I am not to be questioned!"

He pointed his fingers at her, the strands of voltage licking across them like writhing worms. He was about to release it, punish her insubordination, when she looked up at him.

He faltered. The pure fear and anguish in her eyes was an ocean. She was quaking, too, like a leaf in a gust. He'd never had to subdue her like this before; she had never been on the receiving end of his righteous anger to this degree. The lightning dissipated.

He took a step back, reeling, mind rebooting. This wasn't how he was supposed to change things. Fear was no longer his weapon of choice. And the Knights were better than that. They didn't deserve to be denigrated like Hux or the military buffoons. They were not dogs to be beaten when they disobeyed. He'd made it clear they were much for than that.

His voice was so shaky and brittle it made him want to retch. "Meeting dismissed."

Chest heaving, he made for the door as the others simply looked on in bafflement.

He didn't hesitate this time as he pressed the button to open the doors to her room. She sat up in shock as he flew into the room, his robes billowing behind him. He could feel her terror in the force, radiating through the room like an arid squall.

He took a seat across from the bed and put his head into his hands, pressing his palms into his eyes to force them from leaking.

Her voice was soft, tentative. "Ben...?"

"I fucked up," he found himself saying, voice thick. Why did it matter to her? "We had a meeting, and she disagreed, and I..."

"Who?" she wheedled. "What happened?"

He sucked in a breath. It wasn't fair that she had such an effect on him. Such a power. It made him want to turn himself inside out for her, expose every inch of his soul.

"Rhea," he confessed. "One of my Knights. She opposed me in front of all of them, and I—I lost my cool. I threw into the wall. And then I almost tortured her."

He heard her flinch. "Why?"

"Because that's the system, Rey," he explained, lifting his head from his hands to look up at her. "That's how it's been since day one. It was beat into all of us. Snoke, the First Order. It's all run on fear. I only held my power because they were scared of it, afraid of what would happen if they challenged it. That's how it's worked."

She crossed her arms and frowned. "Sounds like you just did what you were supposed to do." Her tone was not kind.

"You don't get it, Rey," he huffed. "I'm trying to change that. The fear, the intimidation, the constant power jockeying. It's...wrong. It's not the way of the Force. Thing cannot continually exist in that state."

"What do you mean?" There was intrigue in her voice now.

"Fear is the Dark Side of the Force. It has its uses, but things, life, cannot exist constantly in the Dark Side. I've learned that much. It will destroy anything that stays too long. The Old Empire succumbed to it. So did the Sith. " He paused, his mind conjuring the image of Pallas, before continuing. "The Dark Side must exist. But so must the Light. The world was formed in its balance. But since then, that equilibrium has become unseated. I aim to restore it."

Her eyes were suspicious. "Luke said the Dark Side was evil. That it ruins people. Lives."

The mention of the Jedi brought his anger back in full force. "Did he say he was resting comfortably in the Light Side when he tried to kill me? When he fought and slew his own Padawans in the ensuing fight? Luke was no innocent. He knew the Dark, tasted it. The problem was, it was too much for him. Instead of controlling it, learning from it, he outright rejected it. And that ultimately drove him to cowardice, hiding away wherever he was until he came to his senses."

Perplexion scrunched her pretty features. "Ensuing fight?" she echoed. "What are you talking about?"

"Ah, I see my esteemed uncle failed to mention that part," he scoffed. "You see, after he tried to murder me, he fled. I followed. I confronted him in front of everyone, challenged him. Many of the students agreed with me, some of whom became Knights. Others didn't. I didn't start the fight, but all of a sudden it happened. And there was the old man. The virtuous Jedi. Killing his students. Enveloped in the Dark Side."

Rey sputtered. "You're lying! That's not what everyone says! You killed them all."

Kylo sighed. "No, I didn't. I let them believe that lie because it strengthened my image. Jedi-Killer. Fear is strong, remember? The Republic could not have their man shamed. The paragon of their 'ethics'." He spat. "They invented that story, insisting I had gone on a random murder spree. I showed you the memory. I'm telling the truth. While Snoke was certainly in my head, I never planned anything like that."

And then it came rushing back to him. The loneliness of his gifts. His alienation to his parents. The lack of friends. The corners of his eyes pricked with wetness again. Damn it.

"Why did he do it?" she asked quietly.

He shook his head. "Because he was weak. He sensed my power, and my growing understanding of the Dark Side, albeit under Snoke's influence. He thought I would destroy the galaxy. He couldn't comprehend the idea of balance in the Force. He was intellectually dishonest, lazy in his thought. He found it much easier to cloak himself in his false idea of purity that caused him so much pain. But the Dark Side is not evil. It is not wrong. It's part of all things. Passion. Anger. Jealousy."

"I don't understand," breathed Rey. "I mean, it does kind of make sense. I've felt the Dark Side before, but it didn't feel anything like Luke described. It didn't feel evil. It felt different, but not like the Jedi say."

"That's because it's a part of who we are," he elaborated. "It's a part of the Force. It exists for a reason. It's the hot side of the coin. It is our basest desires, our instinctual emotions. It's one of the biggest things that make us human. To deny them is to deny yourself. In many ways, it's almost more natural than the Light Side. But they are equally important."

She narrowed her eyes. "I thought Kylo Ren hated the Light Side. Hated the Jedi, it's biggest proponents."

That hurt. "That's an awfully huge assumption for someone that doesn't know me at all," he said in a clipped tone. "I thought you of all people saw the Light in me."

"I did, Ben. Do. But when you do the things you do, hurt people, build weapons that destroy planets, it's becomes pretty hard to see."

He ignored the impulse to lecture on strategy of war. "I rely on the Dark Side, yes. Maybe too much at times. It's what fuels my power. I'm the strongest priest of the Dark in the entire galaxy. But I'm no stranger to the Light. I—I'm drawn to it. The world I want to build can't happen without it. Freeing the slaves? What was that?"

He could see the wheels working in her head as she bit her lip. He pressed on.

"I use Light Side powers of the Force, too, Rey," he said. He abruptly stood and punched the metal wall, the resulting dull thud reverberating through the room. She gasped, and he turned his bleeding hand to her. She watched raptly as he channeled the Force to the wounds on his knuckles, the skin knitting itself back together. After a moment, they were gone.

"See?" he said. "Light Side. Did you know the mind trick was invented by the Jedi? The same people that preach compassion and love for all have no problem removing someone's free will if it fits their paternalistic goals. Things are not black and white, Rey."

He knew then he had said enough to put things in motion. She looked like she was full of a thousand questions, but he wouldn't go further. Not yet. She needed to think on her own. Rushing things was not his modus operandi this time around.

"I've said enough," Kylo said. "How are you feeling?"

"Um," she said, the confusion thicker than syrup in her voice. "Better, I guess. Exhausted mostly."

"Your body is drained," he explained. "The blow to your head will take a lot of energy to heal. Bacta will speed it up, but until it's fully healed you will be sickly."

"And then I'll be free to go?"

The stubbornness returns, he thought grimly. He worked his jaw. "Yes, Rey. So eager to forget the free medical treatment."

She harrumphed. "It's not that I don't appreciate it. But you'll forgive me if I don't exactly trust you."

"In time, Rey," he assured. She gave him a look that didn't subtly suggest she disagreed. "In time."

With that, he gave her a small smile and turned on his heel and left.