There have been a few fics popping up regarding the stuffed blue bear on Hathaway's office book case in a couple of episode. Here's my (probably ridiculous) take on it.

Warnings: Discussion of violence and sexual assault (nothing graphic, not even a description)

Enjoy :)

James Hathaway had had a crap couple of weeks. If pushed, he'd probably have gone as far as to say it was an absolutely fucking shite couple of weeks.

It had all started a fortnight ago, when there had been a murder in broad daylight on the high street. He and Lewis had been top of the rotation, and it had been their job to go and interview the people at the scene. It wasn't the violence that had got to him, although it had been a brutal attack. He's bee a police officer for long enough now to have become somewhat hardened to violence and its effects.

What got to him was the witnesses that he had to interview. Some of them were in shock, which was perfectly understandable, given what they'd seen. One old lady had been shaking as they stood there, and before he'd realised what he was doing, he'd guided her into a chair and sent a uniformed officer to procure a milky, sugary cup of tea for her.

"I-I'm not sure what I saw sergeant."

"James. Its ok. Just tell me whatever you can remember."

"He was...he was wearing a red shirt I think. Y-yes, a read polo shirt and black jeans. He ran past me and-" She started to cry and James laid a hand on hers, trying to comfort her as best he could.

"That's been very helpful Mrs Kerr. Thank you. I'll ask this officer to get you home now. Is there anyone who can stay with you?"

"Yes, my daughter is at home."

"Ok, If you remember anything else, please let us know. And if you want to talk to someone, you can phone this number." he said as he handed her a card with the liason officer's number on it.

"Thank you sergeant, you've been very kind." He smiled at her as the uniformed officer lead her towards a car. Lewis came up behind him, and what he was feeling, must have shown on his face as his inspector bumped his elbow.

"She'll be alright you know. They all will James. You did a great job with her." Hathaway nodded but didn't answer. While he had been somewhat affected by the old lady, and the other witnesses that were dealing with various stages of shock; that wasn't what had got to him.

What had got to him, was the fact that he'd seen those same fearful, grief stricken eyes before. In his bathroom mirror. He shook himself as the memory of a cold and dusty attic surfaced, and clenched a fist as his mind taunted him, projecting images of his own hand opening the cistern. Just when he feared he wasn't strong enough to push the memories away this time, a hand gripped his elbow.

"Don't know about you Jim, but I could do with a cuppa." The smile came to his lips unbidden, as much from relief than the fact that he hadn't realised exactly how badly he wanted a cup of tea as well.

.

The week after hadn't been any better. He and Lewis had been detailed to work on a sexual assault case, and the whole thing had him despairing at humanity. He'd tried and failed to understand how someone could do that to another human being. After a few hours of questioning their suspects, James was at the end of his tether. Lewis recognised this and all but dragged him out of the room, instructing him to try and calm down.

He'd never been so glad to see the back of a case. The night they finished that one, he'd had takeaway and copious amounts of beer at Lewis'.

The hangover he had in the morning did nothing to improve his mood.

.

So it was no surprise that when he was given the task of looking after a child, whose only parent had just been arrested for violence, that James felt he wasn't up to the task.

"Sir...please, get someone else."

"There isn't anyone lad. Look, I know you were looking forward to band practice, but its only until her aunt shows comes down from Reading."

"-Its not that."

"What then? James?"

"These last two weeks have been a pile of crap sir. I'm done with it. I can't think about it any more. I just want to go home, drink a bottle of wine, and crawl under my bed covers." He paused, trying to work out what he was trying to say. "Sir...the state of mind I'm in, I am the last person that should be left with a child. Let alone one that just saw her father get arrested."

"I'm sorry kidda. Its either this or interview the father. Its down to us mate." He could see from Robbie's eyes that the older man was truly sorry that he had to be asked. And James knew that he just didn't have it in him to interview anyone. He sighed, running hand through his hair.

"Where's the kid sir?"

.

The little girl in question didn't seem to be too phased by what was going on. Beyond finding out that her name was Ruby, and she was six years old, James hadn't really talked to her. A WPC had given Ruby some paper and colouring pencils and the child had happily started drawing a unicorn. From what James could see of it, the drawing was fairly good.

He was amusing himself (if one could use that word) by reading one of the kids novels left on the table in the room. So far, he'd spotted two spelling mistakes, one grammatical error and an example of poor printing in one chapter. But he wasn't really paying attention, his mind was running through everything he'd seen in the last fortnight, and he was being highly unsuccessful at pushing it all away. It wouldn't do to have the kid pick up on his feelings. He was supposed to be a calming influence, not that young Ruby looked like she needed it. Then again, James remembers all to well how easy it had been for him to look like a happy six year old, when in truth, he was far from it.

"...book?" He jerked his head up as he registered Ruby's voice.

"Sorry, what did you say?" The kid sighed slightly, coming closer to him.

"I said, are you reading a sad book?" James did a double take, he could barely remember what the last page was even about, it was a distraction, he wasn't paying attention to the plot.

"No, its not sad. Its quite a happy book." I think. "Why do you ask? Would you like to read it?"

"No thank you Mister policeman." She fiddled with the hem of her skirt, before looking up at him earnestly. "If the book is a happy one, why are you sad?"

"W-What?" James blinked, he got the distinct feeling, that he was being psychoanalysed by a six year old.

"Why are you so sad? You look sad." She put her small hand on the seat next to him and hauled herself beside him. "You're a nice policeman. I don't want you to be sad." James smiled at her as best he could manage.

"I'm not sad Ruby. I've just had a tough couple of weeks."

"You're lying mister. You aren't fine." She wander back over to her small rucksack and pulls something from it, before walking back over to him.

"Here. This is Mr Bear. I think you should have him, he's good at making people feel better." James looks down at the small blue bear that has been pressed into his hand. The fur is soft and he can't help but run his thumb down the bears belly. Even as he looked down at it, he knew he couldn't accept this bear though. He might be many things, but he was not going to take a little girl's bear, just for his own selfish need.

"That's very sweet of you Ruby, but I'm sure Mr Bear will be happier with you."

"No, he wants to go with you mister-...what's your name?"

"Serg- James. My name is James."

"James," The little girl repeated, before fixing him with what she clearly thought was an assertive stare. "Mr Bear likes you and he wants to stay with you."

"Ok, we'll see when your aunt gets here shall we," James said, even though he had no intention of keeping the little girls toy.

Sure enough, when Ruby's aunt came to collect her, Mr Bear had 'magically' found hi way back into Ruby's rucksack.

.

Four days later, Lewis came into the office with a small parcel addressed to Hathaway.

"This was waiting for you at front desk. You didn't mention expecting anything."

"I'm not expecting anything...I don't know what that could be."

"Well, its yours, whatever it is," Lewis said, as he handed the parcel to James and sat down at his own desk. James put it to one side, a break in their latest case diverting his curiosity for the time being.

If Robbie was surprised by the smile that lit James' face an hour later as he opened the parcel, and read the note that accompanied it, he didn't say anything.

One day, he'd get Hathaway to tell him what was so special about the little blue bear that now lived on the shelf by his desk. But for now, he was content for the little toy just to make James happy as it watched him work.