A/N: I read every review! Thank you guys SO MUCH :)
I'm pushing that T rating a bit far... but there will be no smut (I'll probably post a bonus chapter for the wedding night on tumblr though)
The book is, again, Aristotle's Compleat Masterpiece
The song is "Scolding Wife" an Irish traditional. The version I used was done by Great Big Sea
The dining hall was filled with rum, beer, food, and men; the fourteen naval officers that had arrived the previous day, all thirteen princes of the Southern Isles, Prince Eugene, Prince Kristoff, King Anders, Siegfried, and Kai.
Hans threw back another shot and laughed as Kristoff easily bested Wolfgang in an arm wrestling victory that threw his older brother out of his chair, "…I was surrounded by three bears and all I had to defend myself was my wits and a dagger…" Hans sighed as he heard Vigo telling what would be one of many false tales he would tell during his stay in Arendelle about how he lost his eye.
Lieutenant Dahl threw his arm across Hans's shoulders, "I know this is normally thrown the night before the wedding, but I figured it would be better if we did it early to avoid any hangovers that might spoil the ceremony," he took another swig from his mug.
"I could always count on you to have my back," Hans smiled at his comrade, "but I don't drink to excess."
"I never said I meant you."
The uproarious laughter and music could be heard throughout the halls. "What are they doing?" Anna asked above the din.
"Drinking and acting like fools," Asta said without looking up from her book, "Wolfgang and I were the first to marry, so this will make the thirteenth one of these I've been
through."
"Have you ever been inside of one?" Anna asked intrigued.
"No," she laughed, "I still want to be able to respect Wolfgang the next morning."
"Did Kristoff not have one?" Gemma asked.
"No, he's not really the social type," a loud eruption of laughter blew down the hall into the drawing room where they sat, "I can't take it!" Anna got up and set off towards the dining hall; Elsa and Rapunzel followed.
They opened the door just enough to see in. Hans, Eugene, and Vigo stood on the table stripped down to their boots, trousers, and shirts with their sleeves rolled to their elbows; Hans still wore his gloves.
When like a roarin' lion she came bustin' down the door
Caught me by the middle and threw me naked on the floor
Hans sang followed by a chorus of voices in varying degrees of slurring:
And if the devil would take her I'd thank him for his pain
I swear to God I'll hang meself if I get married again
Rapunzel laughed, "Well, Asta was right." They watched as the men danced and fell over
laughing like idiots as the trio continued to sing.
"I'll be back in a moment," Hans announced as he jumped off the table and headed towards the door. The three women ducked into an adjacent room to avoid being seen. Hans disappeared into a nearby restroom and as he went to reenter the dining hall was grabbed the by the collar and pulled into the shadows.
"How much have you had?" Elsa asked.
"A few shots of rum."
"How many is 'a few'?"
"More than two," he flashed a playful grin, and ran his eyes down her body.
"Always with a witty comeba…" he spun her around, pinned her to the wall, and greedily took her mouth. His sudden aggression thrilled her and she melted in his arms.
He slipped the tip of his tongue between her lips coaxing them to part. She teasingly opened them slightly, and he pushed his tongue into her mouth; he tasted of spiced rum and dark cherries. Her braid wrapped around the wrist of the hand buried in her hair. They parted and he began slowly trailing hot kisses down her neck, "Oh, Admiral," she moaned. She wrapped her arms around his neck and slid her hands into his hair. His one hand moved from her waist, ran down her side, gripped her rear as a deep growl rumbled in his throat and he pulled her hips against his. "Hans!" she gasped and a beautiful icy pattern spread across the wall directly behind her when she felt his substantial desire press against her through the skirt of her dress.
He smiled against her skin satisfied with her reaction; a deep, sultry chuckle in his throat as he pulled away, "Perhaps there was some wisdom in keeping us apart before the wedding."
The predatory lust in his eyes made her knees weak, she kept one hand in his hair, the other went to the waist of his trousers and pulled him against her again, "Why do you think that?"
"It's becoming exceedingly difficult to behave properly in your presence," he whispered in her ear before returning his mouth to her neck and pressing his body firmly against hers.
She pulled his hair forcing him to face her, brought their lips together and slipped her tongue back into his mouth. Frost spread down the back of his shirt and into his hair; the cool only seemed to excite him more; he rocked his hips against her and pulled her braid. She felt as though she was going to explode if something didn't happen soon. Ice spread across the floor in erratic patterns and wind blew through the corridor in unpredictable gusts.
"Hey, Hans, did you get lost?" Eugene rounded the corner, "Oh, uhh, this is awkward."
Elsa quickly let go of him and blushed. Hans stepped away from her, "Sorry, got a bit distracted."
"Yeah, I can see that," Hans went with Eugene to reenter the dining hall, "You may want to wipe the lipstick off your face first. I don't think you want to explain that to your father, though he may be too drunk to notice."
"That was not what I expecting to walk around the corner to find," Eugene slurred to Kristoff and Klaus, "If I hadn't have come looking for him I think they would have fu…"
"What are you talking about?" Hans asked as he approached the inebriated trio.
"Finding you and Elsa in the hall doing this," Eugene grabbed Hans' shirt and Hans' eyes flew wide as Eugene planted a hard kiss on his lips.
"What in the name of Davy Jones do you think you're doing?" Hans pushed Eugene off of him. The dark haired man fell laughing to the floor; Klaus and Kristoff were in tears. Hans' turned scarlet when he noticed the entire room was staring at him and decided it would be best if he retired for the evening.
The breakfast table was rather quiet, as it seemed Hans, Reinvald, and Gael were the only men not nursing a hangover.. Asta was enjoying making as much noise as she could pretend was accidental next to a very miserable Wolfgang; Hans and Gael were trying not to outright laugh each time she feigned innocence for dropped silverware or hitting her plate with her glass. Klaus and Kristoff kept looking at Hans and laughing before grabbing their heads in pain; Eugene never took his eyes from his plate. Hans blinked lazily at his food; the previous night was a complete blur and he had no idea why they were behaving so strangely or why Elsa couldn't look at him without blushing.
"Two days!" Anna practically bounced in her chair, "are you nervous? Of course you're nervous, but I mean are you super nervous or just kind of nervous?"
Elsa laughed, "Yes, I'm nervous."
"After they're married, can he only wear black coats or does that change since he's the last one?"
Queen Adelaide smiled, "He is only required to wear a black coat when he is in Baltia, or at a large family gathering."
"You were quite different last night," Elsa said softly with a seductive smile as she and Hans stood together slightly away from the crowd.
He looked at her confused, "I don't know what you mean."
She leaned in to make sure no one else could hear her, "You don't remember our little rendezvous in the corridor outside your party?"
Hans eyes grew wide and his face flushed, "Oh, that wasn't a dream," It could be rather unsettling when he dreamt of being the instrument of her death and of her pleasure on the same night, "I'm so sorry. I didn't know rum incited such behavior from me."
"I hope it doesn't always take rum for you to behave like that," she smiled and winked before walking to Anna who wanted to go over the details of jewelry and hair one last time.
He stared dreamily after her; he was going marry that woman and no other man could have her. "Wait," the events of the previous evening started to return. His lips tightened into a small snarl as his brow lowered, "Eugene!" he yelled before turning to find the Prince of Corona.
Hans sat in his room and dug a small book out of a locked box, '"…the desire to venereal embraces is very great, and sometimes almost insuperable. And the use of this so much desired enjoyment being denied to virgins, many times is followed by dismal consequences…"' he felt ridiculous for reading this, but felt that any education on the subject that was not dispensed from the mouth of a sailor or an erotic novel might be useful, '"But when they are married, and their venereal desires satisfied by the enjoyment of their husbands, those distempers vanish, and they become more gay and lively than before."' He had never noticed a difference in Gemma after her marriage to Klaus, but being tainted by the mirror at that time he wasn't sure if he would be able to detect these changes, nor did he really want to think about it. He shook his head trying to rid his mind of the thought of Klaus and Gemma. '"Secondly, the desire of coition, which fires the imagination with unusual fancies and by the sight of brisk charming beauty may soon inflame the appetite." That explained his behavior the previous evening. He had been thoroughly surprised that Elsa had not found his actions despicable, '"…it is apparent the female sex are never better pleased, nor appear more blithe and jocund, than when they are satisfied this way : which is an inducement to believe, they have more pleasure and titulation therein than men."' He closed the book and began to pace the room, a million doubts running through his head.
Elsa, Anna, Rapunzel, Queen Adelaide and the wives of the twelve princes were all gathered for tea and cakes. Elsa, Anna, Rapunzel, Gemma, Asta, and Queen Adelaide sat at a table together.
"What are the most nervous about?" Anna asked before filling her mouth with another bite of cake.
"I really don't know, but I guess part of me is afraid I'll freeze his hands when he puts the ring on."
Anna covered her mouth to keep the confection in as she laughed.
"I have never seen you use your magic before," Asta said to the shock of Queen Adelaide and Gemma, "I'm sure you tire of hearing such requests, but may I see a demonstration?"
"I don't mind at all," Elsa smiled.
Elsa walked to the bailey followed by the rest of the women who formerly occupied the dining hall. Everyone remained on the steps as Elsa stepped on the cobblestone, a collective gasp could be heard as ice raced over the pavement. She affixed blades to Anna's shoes then turned to the rest of the women, "Would anyone else like to skate?"
Priscilla, Lyall, and Dagny remained on the steps while the other women eagerly took Elsa up on her offer. She manipulated the ice of the fountain until it was in the shape of Arendelle's crocus. "You have a truly amazing gift," Hedvig said as she watched in awe as the ice shifted at Elsa's command.
"Thank you," Elsa formed a snowball in her hand and Anna yelped as it came in contact with her posterior.
"Can I have one?" Hedvig asked. Elsa created mounds of snow in the corners of the bailey and the war began.