A/N: Unedited, not proofed. Enjoy this! I know I did!

2:30pm Zed: Hey, it's Zed

2:30pm Zed: Is this still Addison's phone number?

read 2:32pm

4:44pm Addison: Hi Zed

4:45pm Zed: Could we maybe meet up? Talk? It's been a while I know but I think we're overdue a chat

read 4:45pm

5:26pm Addison: I'm not in Seabrook anymore

5:28pm Zed: I know Bree told me you're in Manhattan

5:29pm Zed: I'm also in manhattan, just FYI

read 5:30pm

5:48pm Addison: I'll be at Ceres' Cafe at 2 tomorrow but I won't wait for you for very long

5:50pm Zed: Okay I'll see you there

read 5:50pm

Twenty-two, single, living in New York City. Five years ago, her life fell apart. She'd only just finished putting it back together, and now she felt the walls shaking again.

Only this time, she was going to make her stand. Zed ruined her life. She knew better than to ignore him and would give him the benefit of the doubt. And explain to him exactly all the horror he caused her. He was the reason she only ever talked to Bree and that was still on rare occasions, why she had moved to the biggest city in the country so she could hide and become the most forgettable person there. He made her life miserable and she was just starting to be happy and he wouldn't take that away from her.

"Addison?"

"In the bathroom!" Addison called back. She quickly finished her hair and buttoned her shirt up, then opened the door in time to see James step into the doorway.

"Good morning," he said happily. "I brought you breakfast."

Addison rolled her eyes. "You bring me breakfast every morning."

"Doing anything aside from working today? Maybe dinner?"

Addison shook her head. "I told you yesterday I'm meeting my ex-boyfriend and that will be draining—both emotionally and physically."

"I still don't get why you're meeting him? I thought he made you miserable."

"I loved him," Addison stated. "We were in love."

"And he left you."

"Maybe he might have had a reason," Addison suggested. "And I won't know if I don't meet with him. Who knows, maybe we might end up as friends again."

James scoffed as they walked out of Addison's room. "Or you'll end up as his little bitch again."

"I won't cave," Addison stated. "I even wrote down everything I want to say to him, in case I get distracted. He was very attractive back in high school."

James rolled his eyes. "Okay, whatever."

"Don't make me take my key away again."

Working in a locally owned cafe in New York City had the perks of being quiet and rarely noticed. Addison had a lot of down time and used it to perfect her notes. She was only getting one chance and she wasn't going to screw it up.

Zed was on time. He walked through the door the minute the clock hit two and when Addison looked up from her spot behind the counter she knew taking notes was the perfect idea. He was still Zed—green hair and pale skin and absolutely perfect. It was summer and hot out, his grey shirt hugging his muscles tightly. She was sure if he turned his butt would look fabulous in his jeans.

When he saw her he frowned and walked up to the counter. "Addison?"

She cleared her throat and took a second to clear her head. He was attractive—even more so than when she'd last seen him—but he was a jerk and she couldn't forget that. "Would you care to order something?" Addison asked.

"You…I mean, no thanks. I just wanna talk with you."

Addison nodded and turned to her coworker. "I'm going on break," she announced, pulling off her apron and moving from behind the counter.

She lead Zed to a booth in the corner, sitting on one side while he sat across from her. "My break is fifteen minutes so make this snappy."

"I just wanted to see how you're doing," he explained. "And…and to apologize."

"I'm well. Now get on with the apology."

Zed nodded, glancing down at his hands then back at her—or more precisely, her hair. "You're wearing your wig again," he observed.

"That doesn't sound like an apology."

"Why?" Zed asked, ignoring her statement. "I-I thought you'd never wear it again."

"It's easier to hide from my past when I'm not such a freak."

"Your hair isn't freakish."

"What an interesting opinion from the guy who ruined my life."

Zed rolled his eyes which just infuriated her more. "You're exaggerating."

Addison clenched her fists on the table. She needed to keep as calm and cool as possible. "Do you know what it's like to be cast out in your own school? To have no one? To have everyone who you thought was your friend push you around and call you a freak or a whore? Because that's what you did. You left and everyone blamed me."

"It was your fault."

"I swore to you I wouldn't tell anyone, Zed. And I didn't. My dad heard me say it in my sleep and investigated and had enough evidence to convict Zevon."

Zed's face said exactly how shocked he was. She felt a little happy at that, but the absolute anger she'd been building up inside for five years was finally bubbling out.

"I kept my word, but you always just wanted someone to blame for everything that didn't go perfect in your life and you made mine a fucking nightmare. Everything that didn't go right that summer you just blamed on me and it ruined me! Do you know how it feels to be told it's your fault that a little girl who was like a sister to you died? Do you understand how completely soul crushing that is?"

"I-I—" Zed sighed and shook his head. "I don't."

"I put up with so much crap because of you," Addison spat. "So yes, I wanted to hide my hair again because the only person who ever liked it was you and clearly that was a mistake because I'm so useless and stupid to think that what we had was ever real. Dating you was such a fucking fantasy, okay? When you left I didn't even feel liberated because I was in the middle of the hellstorm you created. You broke me. You broke my heart. Nothing you could say will ever change that."

"I wish there was a stronger word than sorry," Zed said. "I know you don't want to hear my apology."

"Do you think words could make up for what I'm feeling?" Addison asked rhetorically. "I wanted to kill myself because of you. Do you get that? You made me want to die."

Zed's expression said it all. He was speechless and shocked and completely remorseful. Addison felt both proud and upset.

"You hit me up after years of blocking me," she went on. "And I responded. And…I don't know why, Okay? I didn't think I'd ever want you back in my life, and I still don't know. You were the best thing that ever happened to me, and you turned into the worst mistake. And you just show up here, cute as fuck and just making me want to stop being angry and hug you."

"I'm sorry?"

"Shut up." Addison spat. "You need to stop being so sincere and endearing and just…ugh!"

"Addison, look, I came here because I was stupid and unfair to you," Zed said. "I wanted to talk with you. Your the first person I wanted to talk to."

"I'm listening."

Zed sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry I just used you as a personal punching bag. I never apologized for blaming you for Zoey's death. It wasn't your fault, you couldn't do anything. I just…I just got so mad and I couldn't deal with the fact that my little sister was gone and I wanted someone to blame. You didn't deserve that, and I'm surprised you even put up with me that long."

"You weren't being yourself," Addison said. "You were grieving. I knew you didn't mean any of it."

"Your making excuses for me," Zed pointed out. "It doesn't change the fact that I said it, either. It didn't even cross my mind that I was hurting you. I…I just wanted to blame someone for what was happening, and I can't say I'm sorry enough."

"You were grieving," Addison explained. "I was grieving. We all were. Zoey was the sweetest little angel I knew. And, I'll admit, I was grieving in a very bad way. I wanted life to keep moving and I wanted to forget it even happened. And I tried to force you to grieve the same way I was. I was pushing you prematurely, and that is my fault."

"But you were also the most supportive person," Zed said. "I relied on you so much. I don't think I could've handled it without you. And Puppy, he got me through a lot after I left."

"How's Puppy?"

"He's so old," Zed said wistfully. "He can't even finish walls anymore, it's so sad."

"Is he here too?"

Zed nodded. "Do you know how hard it is to find a pet friendly hotel? Because I do."

Addison giggled despite herself. "My apartment is pet friendly," she pointed out. "James had a cat when we were roommates."

Zed raised a curious and slightly threatening eyebrow at that. "James?"

Addison felt oddly proud that Zed seemed jealous. "Yeah. He moved out though, lived with his brother now."

"Interesting." Zed let out a breath and looked around. "I don't remember what I was saying."

"I think you were apologizing for being a dick to me."

"Sounds about right." Zed said. "I can't really think of what else to say but I'm sorry. If your break wasn't almost over I'd tell you where I was and what I was doing."

"Um, I feel like I'll regret this, but you can come over for dinner tonight. And explain everything."

Zed smiled and Addison couldn't help but notice his slight, barely noticeable dimples. "That would be nice, yeah."

3:02pm Addison: Go to my apartment and make dinner

3:02pm Addison: I don't care what you make just make it good

3:03pm Addison: And make some steamed cauliflower too

3:11pm James: You're so bossy

3:11pm James: And who even eats cauliflower?

"You invited your ex-boyfriend for dinner?"

Addison nodded. "We had a very liberating chat that was ended when my fifteen minutes were up. I want to make him suffer more."

"Or you'll end up in bed with him," James deadpanned. "This is a bad idea."

"That's why you'll be here to make sure I don't do anything stupid," Addison said with a grin. "He thinks we're dating too."

"Why were you talking about me?"

"We were talking about pets." Addison moved out from the bathroom and to her closet. "He said he's bringing his dog, just a warning. Though Puppy is the cutest little thing in the world."

James sat up from his spot on her bed with a raised brow. "Puppy? He named his dog 'Puppy'?"

"His sister named him Puppy when she was six," Addison explained. "And yes, that's the sister we won't mention tonight."

"I don't wanna go."

"You don't have a choice," Addison stated. "We need to praise the chef and shit. Also, keep me from doing stupid shit."

"Like dressing up to impress him?"

Addison rolled her eyes. "This dress is to actually show off my self harm scars," she stated. "You know I don't hide anything in my own apartment." Except my hair.

"You just want to make him feel bad."

"That's also true. It's why you're pretending to be my boyfriend. Without actually saying it. So he can think we're dating, but we have the opportunity to say that we never even said we're dating."

"I thought we only fake dated on holidays?"

"It's technically not fake dating," Addison explained. She slipped into a pair of wedges then moved over to her jewelry box. "Well just do what we've been doing for years, and I'm sure he'll think we're dating. Just don't dawn over him, he's really cute."

"He was a jerk to you! He can't be that attractive."

They both turned at the sound of knocking on the door. James got off her bed and followed her to the door. When she opened it Zed smiled with Puppy and a bouquet of flowers in his arms. His smile faltered when his eyes landed on James.

"Fuck," James breathed out.

Addison stepped to the side and let Zed come in. "I brought flowers for you," Zed offered.

"Thank you. Wanna grab those for me, James? Put them in a vase for me?"

"Sure thing."

Addison walked over to her table with Zed and James on her trail. "I see you brought Puppy."

"I don't like leaving him alone."

James went into the kitchen with the flowers leaving the two of them alone. "So, James?" Zed whispered.

Addison smiled. "He's nice, isn't he?"

"That's one way to put it."

Addison stepped to him and took Puppy from his arms. "Oh how I've missed you!" she gushed. "What a cutie! Who's a good boy, who's a good boy!"

Zed smiled at her. James came back in from the kitchen and looked Zed up and down. "Cool hair. What color is that? My brother is always looking for a nice shade of green."

Zed gave Addison a look as if to say 'is this guy for real?' that completely flew past her, since she was still gushing over Puppy. "I'm a Zombie," Zed stated. "My hair is naturally green."

James sucked in a breath. "You just got so much hotter."

"What?"

"Addy, he's a Zombie! Did you know he's a Zombie?"

"Yes James, I knew he was a Zombie," Addison said. She looked at Zed and shook her head. "Don't mind him. He's just fangirling because he's never seen a Zombie in person."

She let Puppy down then sat at the table. The two men followed suit, and Addison looked at James pointedly. "What're you doing? Go get the dinner!"

"Calm down, blondie," James said as he stood up again and went off into the kitchen.

Addison looked at Zed seriously, folding her hands on the table. "It smells like caulibrains," Zed said.

"I asked James to make some," Addison explained. "I know you need your brain substitute."

"How considerate of you."

"I like to think of others and how they might feel," Addison said pointedly. "Have you learned that other people feel things? That you should consider those feelings?"

"Yes, actually," Zed said. "I was in Minnesota, in this nice and quiet cabin in the woods."

Addison made a face at that. "Why would you willingly go to Minnesota?"

"Because no one's there," Zed explained. "And I just wanted to be alone and…and think. I wanted time to process everything."

Addison squinted at him. "But in Minnesota? Of all places?"

Zed nodded. "Who would find me in Minnesota?"

He had a point. James returned with the tray of baked ziti, putting it in the center of the table before going back in the kitchen.

"So James?" Zed asked.

"This is a dinner to talk about you and what you were doing in Minnesota for five years."

"Well, I finished high school there," Zed said. "It's really quiet and nice there. I did some odd jobs around the nearby town, but I spent most of the time as the secluded new guy in my cabin."

"Must have been nice to be unbothered for five years," Addison said.

"I didn't tell you because I was mad at you," Zed explained. "I wasn't mad at you forever. I started missing you a few days after I left. But I needed time. I just needed time to myself."

James returned again, balancing a tray of mashed potatoes and a tray of steamed cauliflower in his arms.

"You could've told me," Addison stated. "I would've understood. I would've given you your space. You were my boyfriend and I loved you. I would've understood."

"Well it didn't feel that way, at the time," Zed stated. "It felt like you wanted me to move on from what had happen. I dunno, I was eighteen and stupid. And hurting. It didn't take me long to realize that I could've talked to you, but then I figured you'd probably be better off without me."

Addison rolled her eyes. James looked between the two of them, then went about putting food onto the three plates.

"I had no idea that everyone would come for you," Zed went on. "I just figured everyone would be better and more free without me grieving and killing the mood."

"Not only was I miserable because people treated me like some cheap slut, but I was heartbroken." Addison stated. "You just blocked me and disappeared. We were gonna go to college together. We had a life plan, Zed. And you just threw it all away."

"Maybe…I should go." James suggested.

"Yes." Zed said, while Addison said, "No."

They looked at each other and sighed. "Could we at least try to be friends?" Zed asked.

Addison shook her head. "I don't want that," she said. "I don't really want you to come back in my life and pretend like everything's okay and fine and perfect. In fact, I think you should go."

Zed's face crumbled at her words. "Addy, wait—"

"Please. Just leave."

Zed looked like he wanted to protest but said nothing. He nodded and stood up, moving into the living room and grabbing Puppy in his arms. Addison got up and followed him, walking him to the door. Zed stepped into the hallway and looked at Addison sadly.

"I'm sorry," he apologized. "Addy, please. Just give me a chance. Please. I-I love you. I still love you. I never stopped loving you."

Addison just looked at him. She didn't want to give him another chance at all, but somewhere deep inside of her she knew she couldn't let him suffer any longer. Before, she'd wanted him to suffer the same way she did. But now she knew she didn't want anyone to feel the same way she had.

"James is gay," she stated. Then she closed the door.