"Arrrrrrrrrrrrgh!" King Piccolo awoke screaming the morning after the night before. He threw his hands onto his head in agony as a thundering pain cascaded through his skull, worse than anything he had ever felt in his entire life. "What… what's going on!"
"Oh, so you're awake?" Frikiza's voice caught King Piccolo's attention, and he looked over to see her leaning against the bathroom door with her arms folded, smirking at him. "I was starting to think you were dead."
"Give me five minutes." King Piccolo groaned, rubbing his throbbing head. Dammit, he felt like his brain was being pummelled by someone as heavy as him! What was going on? And his stomach… he had such terrible indigestion, and he felt like he wanted to vomit! What the hell was happening to him? King Piccolo tried to think. That woman… Goku's wife. She'd cooked for him… That was it! She'd poisoned him! The bitch! "Food poisoning!" King Piccolo snarled, and leapt off the bed. "I'm going to kill that –" He stopped when a sudden wave of nausea overcame him. Oh, hell…

Frikiza stepped aside as King Piccolo came charging towards her and into the bathroom. She let out a sigh when she head the all too familiar sound of the demon king vomiting.
"It's not food poisoning." Frikiza said flatly. "It's called a hangover."
"Hangover!" King Piccolo snorted. "What the hell are you talking about! I didn't drink alcohol in that house – or did she spike my drink as well?"
"What about the thirty one shots of alcohol that you had here last night?" Frikiza replied, glaring over at him. "Junior came over this morning to check on you – and we had a really interesting conversation. He was very concerned about your wellbeing – and why wouldn't he be? I have no idea how you're still alive!"
"Junior…" King Piccolo mumbled. He spat into the toilet and closed his eyes. What was she talking about…? Why had Junior been here? Come to think of it, King Piccolo couldn't remember anything that had happened last night… He couldn't remember anything that had happened after he'd left Goku's house… What was going on!

King Piccolo frowned, and suddenly noticed that his top half felt different to his bottom. He looked down at his body to see that he'd rolled his gi down to his waist. His belt was loose, and he wasn't wearing his shoes… What the hell? Also… King Piccolo looked over towards the bed in confusion. Why had he woken up there? Why wasn't he in the chair…? "Did you sleep in the chair?" King Piccolo asked.
"What?" Frikiza looked at him. "I slept in the bed."
"But… didn't I sleep there…?" King Piccolo uttered. This didn't make any sense… What shots of alcohol? Why had Junior been here? Why was he only half dressed!
"Yeah… you did." Frikiza stared at King Piccolo. "You really don't remember?"
"No, I…" King Piccolo trailed off, struggling to remember anything that had happened the day before. Okay… He'd woken up, then he'd met Junior… Then they were at the amusement park, and he'd had dinner at Goku's house, then he'd said goodbye to Junior, then he and Frikiza had come back here, she'd given him a bracelet – which he was still wearing. King Piccolo looked down at the bracelet on his wrist, using it as a memory prompt. He'd thought it was pointless, so he went to sleep… in the chair! He did sleep in the chair! He remembered doing it! So how did he end up in the bed…? In the bed with… Oh…

King Piccolo's eyes widened. He'd… he'd had that dream! He'd had that dream, and he'd gone to the bar… Yes. Yes, he did drink – and Junior was there! Why was Junior there…? King Piccolo couldn't remember. He rubbed his head, forcing his memories of the night before to come out of hiding. He remembered being in an elevator with Junior… then where did Junior go after that? He wasn't in this room, was he? King Piccolo didn't remember being in the room with Junior. The next thing he remembered was getting into bed with Frikiza, then… "Ohhh…" King Piccolo groaned as the events of last night suddenly came flooding back to him. "Oh… shit!"

Frikiza frowned when King Piccolo started violently throwing up into the toilet.
"Hey!" She yelled, insulted. "Do you have to react like that! I washed your stupid dragonballs!"
"The dragonballs!" King Piccolo gasped. He turned to Frikiza, his eyes suddenly wide with panic. "Where are they!"
"Under the pillow, where you left them!" Frikiza snapped. "Hey!" She cried out when King Piccolo raced towards her and violently pushed her out of the way to dive onto the bed. He retrieved the dragonballs and wasted no time in swallowing them. "The least you could do is thank me!" Frikiza yelled.
"Thank you?" King Piccolo roared. Was she serious? Was she actually serious? "You slept with me!"
"No I didn't!" Frikiza argued. "I could have slept with you – you were literally begging me to sleep with you, but I didn't! Because I knew you would regret it and I didn't want to do that to you! And on top of that, I washed puke off your stupid dragonballs!"
"You did sleep with me!" King Piccolo snarled. "You shared a bed with me and went to sleep, how is that not sleeping with me!"
"I had no choice, you climbed on top of me." Frikiza hissed.
"Oh – whatever! You're always going on about how much stronger than me you are, why didn't you just push me off!" King Piccolo snapped. She was unbelievable. What nerve! What insolence! How dare she take advantage of him like that! And when he had food poisoning, of all things! She was not a good person!
"Because I just wanted you to go to sleep and get the night over with!" Frikiza pouted.

King Piccolo was speechless, too enraged to utter a single word. What could even he say to that? Did she really think that she, a mere bleeding heart weakling icejin, was justified in sleeping beside him, the great Demon King Piccolo? How was he supposed to react to this? He'd shared a bed with Frikiza. Frikiza! And… oh God, he remembered now… He'd kissed her. He'd actually – ew! Disgusting! "Anyway, we have to check out in twenty minutes, so are you done being hungover?" Frikiza sniped.
"I am not hungover!" King Piccolo screamed. "Goku's wife gave me food poisoning! It's the only reason I – we –" His face darkened; he couldn't even say it; it was too revolting! "It's the only reason that – that last night happened! She drugged me!"
"Oh Piccolo, shut up." Frikiza spat. "You had thirty one shots of alcohol last night, you were so drunk that Junior had to escort you back to your room – you were so drunk that he had to open the room for you because you couldn't get the key in the door!" She watched as King Piccolo paused for a moment. His eyes moved as he tried to recall the events of last night, and a sudden rage flooded his face.
"I had food poisoning!" King Piccolo exclaimed. "Listen to me, you insolent little lizard – I was not drunk. I am the great Demon King Piccolo, and the great Demon King Piccolo does not get drunk!" He glared at Frikiza. "Why do you think I'm vomiting! It's a classic symptom of food poisoning!"
"And also of being hungover." Frikiza replied.
"I am not –" King Piccolo suddenly retched, and raced into the bathroom again. Frikiza clenched her fists and tapped her foot in annoyance at the sound of him vomiting. Then there was another sound, like something hitting a surface… like dragonballs hitting a surface… Oh, he did not… "Frikiza." King Piccolo's voice confirmed Frikiza's worst fear. If he even thought about asking her to – "Come and clean these dragonballs."
"Fuck you!" Frikiza screamed and flung her tail at King Piccolo, knocking him out cold.

XXXXX

Slurp. Scrape. Munch. King Piccolo shook as every single sound of Frikiza eating her breakfast thundered though his head like an avalanche.
"Can you… stop eating so loudly…?" He hissed through gritted teeth, clutching his head as he sat opposite her in a restaurant that served breakfast all day.
"I'm not eating loudly." Frikiza replied flatly. She wasn't. She was barely making any noise at all, he was just sensitive to it.
"Well then just stop eating." King Piccolo seethed. He grabbed his glass of water and downed it, just as he had downed the other ten glasses before it. He let out a sigh and rubbed his head.
"You should start." Frikiza said, moving her eyes to the food on his plate, which was barely touched. King Piccolo clenched his fists in anger, pushing his knuckles into his skull. Was she trying to mock him? He wanted to eat, he was starving! But every time he took a bite he felt sick… What the hell had Goku's wife put in that food!
"I'm not hungry." King Piccolo growled.
"That doesn't matter. If you eat your hangover will go away quicker." Frikiza said.
"I'm not –"
"Then your food poisoning." Frikiza sighed, rolling her eyes. "Trust me. It'll help."
"… If I puke, I'm puking on you." King Piccolo muttered. He grabbed his fork, and reluctantly started eating his food. Ugh… he could barely keep it down. This was hell…

Frikiza's eyes softened, and she looked at him.
"You've never had 'food poisoning' before, have you?" She asked sympathetically.
"No!" King Piccolo barked. "And stop looking at me like that! I don't need your pity – don't think I've forgiven you for last night!"
"Okay, I'm going to ask you this one last time – what the hell do I have to be sorry for?" Frikiza demanded. "I should be the one that's mad at you – do you know you tried to rape me last night?"
"Oh, don't be ridiculous." King Piccolo scoffed, pouring himself another glass of water from the jug that had been left on the table. "I didn't do anything of the sort."
"Piccolo. You wanted to have sex, I said no, and you carried on trying anyway. That's the definition of rape." Frikiza stated.
"Then you should be thanking me. You're into that, aren't you?" King Piccolo sniped. Frikiza had to force herself to not blow up this entire building. How could he say that? How could he even think of saying something as arrogant and as stupid as that! She was livid. Absolutely livid!
"I'm not answering you." Frikiza snapped.
"You just did." King Piccolo smirked, relishing in his first victory of the day. Finally, something he could be happy about!

Frikiza to shake with rage. How dare me! The arrogant, disgusting…
"You know – if anybody finds out about last night, I'm going to get fired." Frikiza hissed. "And there are some people who do appreciate the work I do for them, so you just fucked over a lot of your cellmates."
"Why cares?" King Piccolo grunted. "I hope you get fired. Then you can leave."
"Well if I do get fired, I'll make sure every single person in hell knows exactly why." Frikiza narrowed her eyes at King Piccolo and smirked spitefully, causing him to stop eating and stare at her.
"You wouldn't…" King Piccolo seethed.
"Yeah I would." Frikiza winked. "Remember, I'm Frieza."
"… … This stays between us." King Piccolo said sternly. "Nobody needs to know."
"Fine." Frikiza shrugged. "But you're going to have a counselling session with me every day for the next three months – and you're going to attending meetings on a daily basis."
"What!" King Piccolo cried. "No! I am not –"
"You want everyone to know what happened?" Frikiza threatened.
"… … Bitch." King Piccolo spat. Frikiza giggled.
"Sorry." She smirked.
"No you're not." King Piccolo snarled.
"You're right."

King Piccolo watched as Frikiza picked up her drink and raised her straw to her lips, looking at him triumphantly as she sipped. That bitch…
"I hate you." King Piccolo stated.
"I'm sorry." Frikiza replied. "I'm finding it hard to believe you now."
"I told you, I was poisoned!" King Piccolo yelled, banging his clenched fist on the table. "Do you really think I would have come anywhere near you if I wasn't!"
"No." Frikiza said. "And I told you – that's why I didn't do it."
"… You mean you would have?" King Piccolo uttered, suddenly taken aback. Really…? If she thought he wouldn't regret it, would she…?
"Um…" Frikiza blushed slightly. "Well…"
"There you two are!" Oh, thank God.

Frikiza sighed inwardly, grateful for the distraction when she heard Fortune-teller Baba's voice. She turned her head and looked at the woman that had appeared at their table.
"Baba." Frikiza greeted her. "Has it calmed down?"
"Yes." Baba nodded. "Everything's back to normal – you can come back to hell now. Sorry about the trouble, Frikiza."
"Oh, it's no trouble." Frikiza smiled. "He wasn't hard to deal with."
"Really…?" Baba uttered, looking at King Piccolo sceptically. "It certainly looked hard…" She moved her eyes to Frikiza. "Uh… by the way… once he's back in hell, King Yemma wants to see you."
"Oh… really?" Frikiza uttered. Dammit… she was afraid of this. Had he found out? Shit! "Do you know what about?"
"Let's just get him back first." Baba smiled, and looked at King Piccolo. She stared at him for a long moment. He looked a mess. His eyes were sunken, his antennae were drooping, he looked tired and dehydrated… It was a classic hangover. "You know," Baba began. "I always find that sports drinks help me when I'm hungover."
"Dammit, I am not hungover!" King Piccolo roared, causing the entire restaurant to shake.

XXXXX

Meanwhile back in hell the Cell Juniors were finally contained inside a prison cell. They held themselves against the bars of their cell, putting their arms through the gaps to reach out to their enraged father. Cell was screaming at the top of his lungs and flailing wildly, desperately trying to fight off Frieza, Zarbon and Dodoria, who were all holding him down.
"Dammit guys, get off me or I will destroy you!" He roared.
"Cell, settle down! It's just for three days!" Dodoria protested. "If you're so against them being locked up then why didn't you just raise havoc yourself?"
"Because I never thought these monsters would be sick enough to lock away children!" Cell yelled, and glared at the hell guards who had just locked the Juniors away. "What the hell is wrong with you!"
"What are you talking about, Oni?" One of the guards questioned. "When you were alive you killed thousands of children."
"Yeah, so what! None of them were my children! Nobody messes with my children!" Cell screamed, and powered up so much it threw Dodoria and Zarbon off him, leaving only Frieza to barely cling onto Cell's back.
"Would you calm down!" Frieza snapped, glaring at Cell angrily. "It's three days Cell, it's hardly a lifetime! And if you ask me it'll do them good – those runts of yours are running wild, they need discipline!"
"And you think this is a good way to do it!" Cell argued, shaking Frieza off him. He stared down at the icejin with fury in his eyes, amazed at how Frieza could condone this. "Locking them up like animals? Taking them away from their home – their father?"
"You make it sound like it's a terrible thing." Frieza shrugged. "I know a child that was taken from his home and father, and it was for more than three days – he spent his entire life imprisoned away from his home, and he turned out alright."
"Really…?" Cell uttered, calming down a little. "Who was that?" He asked.
"Vegeta." Frieza answered.
"Vegeta!" Cell shrieked, powering up again. "Are you fucking kidding me, Frieza! Vegeta? He's the most mentally unstable person I know!"
"Must be where Cell gets it from…" Dodoria mumbled to Zarbon.
"Mm-hm." Zarbon nodded in agreement, watching as Cell became so enraged his eyes almost popped out of his skull.
"Oh, relax." Frieza sighed, waving a hand. "Vegeta may have a few loyalty issues, but he turned out far better than his father – and it's because I took him away from King Vegeta."
"Frieza – I don't give a rat's ass how you think Vegeta turned out, I am not letting my Juniors spend three days in prison!" Cell yelled.
"Oh, but think of how nice it'll be without them." Frieza smirked. "It'll be like they're spending a long weekend with their grandfather, and when they come back I guarantee they'll be easier to control."
"But –"
"Ah-ah." Frieza narrowed his eyes at Cell. "How often do I tell you that you spoil those children? I keep telling you Cell, you're their father, not their friend. It's your responsibility to make sure they learn discipline – and this is your perfect opportunity."

Cell hesitated for a moment, then looked over at the imprisoned Cell Juniors. They started back at him and stretched their arms through the bars of their prison, looking at Cell pleadingly.
"Papa…" The Juniors whimpered. "Please – don't leave us."

Cell looked away and scrunched his eyes shut, trying to block out the sound of their desperate pleading. Their weak, helpless little voices echoed through his ears, seemingly getting louder with every second that passed.
"Papa… Papa, please… help us. Help us, Papa…"
"… No!" Cell wailed, snapping his eyes open. He stared at Frieza desperately, his eyes suddenly shimmering. "I can't, Frieza! I can't leave them there! Kids!" He raced over to the prison cell and grabbed the Juniors' hands. "I'll get you out of here – I promise!"
"No!" Frieza snapped. He wrapped his tail around Cell's waist and yanked him away from the Juniors. "This is for your own good Cell, and theirs. Trust me, one day you will all thank me for this." He looked over at Zarbon and Dodoria, and motioned for them to go home. They nodded and flew off towards Frieza's cave with Frieza following, dragging a reluctant Cell behind him.
"No! Frieza, please!" Cell begged. "You don't understand! They aren't like Kuriza, you can't just discipline them all the time!"
"Yes you can." Frieza answered. "And we will – starting with that cage."
"No! No!" Cell wailed so loudly his voice could be heard all over hell.

XXXXX

Elsewhere in Otherworld, Frikiza was stood nervously in front of King Yemma's desk, staring up at him. She had just escorted King Piccolo back to hell, and as instructed had immediately come here. Now… well, now she was expecting to get fired. Why else would King Yemma want to see her? He'd been pleased with her work up to now – she'd managed to purify a lot of souls. Hundreds of people were now spending their afterlife in heaven because of her and her colleagues. But… this was unacceptable. Frikiza didn't have many rules to abide by, but this was one of them – under no circumstances was she to become romantically involved with any of her clients. She'd kissed King Piccolo. For whatever reason… She'd broken that rule, and now King Yemma wanted to speak to her. It couldn't be about anything else, the timing was too perfect. Frikiza wasn't even from this universe. She was only here on a temporary basis anyway – so why would King Yemma even hesitate to cut her time in this universe short? He wouldn't right? What would be the point? He had to set an example to the other rehabilitation workers, after all. It made sense… Frikiza couldn't blame him for it. Even so…

Frikiza clenched her fist slightly. Dammit! That stupid demon! Why did he have to get so drunk! Why did he have to – no. No, this wasn't his fault. How could she even think it was? Frikiza scolded herself. This wasn't King Piccolo's fault, not at all. She had been sober and he had been drunk. He'd been vulnerable, and he'd had no idea what he was doing. She shouldn't have kissed him. That was a bad move – it was wrong on every level. And when he'd advanced on her, Frikiza should have stopped him. She should have tried harder to keep him away… but she didn't. In a way, she hadn't wanted to. Goku and his family were right… She did like him. She hadn't meant to, but… He was her type. He was tough and edgy, and strong, and tall, and good-looking… and he did have a sweet side, Frikiza knew it. She'd wanted to draw that side of him out – actually she'd kind of hoped that if she could rehabilitate someone as difficult as King Piccolo, then she would be allowed to stay in this universe for a few months longer. It hadn't exactly worked out like that, though. She'd started working with him, and somehow she'd ended up… Like this. This was how she'd ended up. In front of King Yemma's desk, about to get fired from a job that was probably saving her life right now… and all because she had a tiny crush on a stupid namekian demon!
"Frikiza." King Yemma uttered.
"Yes!" Frikiza squealed, staring up at him.
"Seems like you had fun on Earth, hm?" King Yemma narrowed his eyes at Frikiza. "You know you aren't supposed to get involved with your clients."
"… I know." Frikiza said quietly. It was just as she'd thought. She was getting fired. She would have to go back to her own universe, where her mother and sister were waiting for her, and she would have to spend the rest of her life on the run. Dammit. All Frikiza had wanted was to work in this universe for a couple more months. Just another couple of months of freedom, before she had to go home, back to that life… … Oh well. At least she'd had a small break. It wasn't all bad. Frikiza still had a secret home back in her universe; her mother and sister hadn't found it yet. That would give Frikiza some time, to find someplace safe to go. If there was even a safe place left in the universe…
"Still, I'm surprised at him." King Yemma mumbled, leaning his face into his palm. "In all the years that terror has been around, he's never reacted to anyone the way he's reacted to you." He looked down at Frikiza. "You almost make it look like he can be controlled."
"Thank you." Frikiza smiled slightly. Well, at least she'd done some good. Maybe he wouldn't be quite so impossible for whoever was unfortunate enough to take him on next.
"I never thought I'd see it." King Yemma smirked. "But I think King Piccolo might actually like you."
"What?" Frikiza blinked. No… No, that was ridiculous! He didn't… Did he?
"Haha." Fortune-teller Baba sniggered from beside Frikiza. "Well, I wouldn't go that far, but there are certainly parts of her that he likes." She looked at Frikiza and winked. "Wasn't it your pyjamas?"
"Um…" Frikiza started to blush. "Well… yeah, he did say that… but he was drunk. He didn't mean it." He didn't, right? He didn't… He didn't mean that?
"He wasn't drunk this morning." King Yemma stated. "And you still managed to get him to eat, and sit in a restaurant without blowing it up – and you got him to have dinner with Goku!" He stared down at Frikiza in amazement. "How the hell did you manage that?"
"Well…" Frikiza's cheeks turned even darker and she lowered her eyes modestly. "I don't think it's because he likes me, if that's what you're thinking." She shrugged. "He knows I'm stronger than him. I think he felt more forced than persuaded, Sir."
"Hm. Maybe." King Yemma grunted. "Even so. In this case, I think maybe we can make an exception to the rules."
"What?"

Frikiza stared at King Yemma in disbelief. What was he saying? Wait… did he mean…?
"You like him, right?" King Yemma questioned.
"Um…" Frikiza uttered, blushing again. She looked away. "Well…"
"Oh come on Dear, don't be shy." Baba smirked. "To be honest I think you can do better, but the heart wants what it wants." She smiled a little. "If you can tame that monster, the two of you might actually make a good couple." She looked Frikiza up and down, and pictured King Piccolo before thinking to herself, "Albeit a rather unattractive one…"
"If you can get him to like you, he's yours." King Yemma said.
"What!" Frikiza gasped. "You… you mean…?"
"Yep." King Yemma nodded. "Date him, marry him. Whatever. Actually, if something does happen between you two it might actually mellow him out a little. You'd be doing Otherworld a favour."

Frikiza was speechless. King Yemma was… He – he said she could… She could date Piccolo! Piccolo! The tall, strong, dreamy… Eep!
"You seem happy." Baba giggled, watching as a wide grin swept across Frikiza's face. It was cute, after all. Baba had no idea what Frikiza saw in that monster though.
"Oh – it's stupid." Frikiza uttered, trying to calm herself. "I'm sure he doesn't like me anyway – I'm happy to continue as his counsellor but I don't think anything will happen between us." Right. Of course not. King Piccolo didn't like her. No, he didn't. He didn't. … Did he? Did he really? King Yemma did say that Frikiza was the only that had even come close to controlling King Piccolo… Oh, but she was stronger than him! He had to listen to her – he had no choice! Then there was last night, after all… but he was drunk. That didn't count – he was drunk! … But didn't alcohol just bring out a person's true self? All their secret thoughts, and desires…? Maybe King Piccolo wouldn't admit to it when he was sober, but perhaps deep down he did like Frikiza… No! No way! Of course not. He didn't. If he did he would have said so. He would have… wouldn't he? Why wouldn't he? What would he have to lose? Maybe he was shy, if he'd never been with a girl before… Oh – whatever! In any case, did this mean Frikiza was off the hook? "King Yemma," Frikiza looked up at him. "Does this mean I can stay here?"
"Yes – until your contract is up." King Yemma nodded. "But listen." He narrowed his eyes at Frikiza. "You can date King Piccolo. Just King Piccolo. If you get involved with any of your other clients, you're going home. Understand?"
"Yes." Frikiza beamed. "Thank you, Sir! I promise I won't go near anyone else!"
"Good." King Yemma grunted.
"Tch. Well, I still think you can do better." Baba snorted. "But good luck with that ogre – just promise me you'll bring out the good in him." She smirked a little. "It'll be worth it just to see the look on Frieza and Cell's faces."
"Frieza and Cell?" Frikiza repeated, looking at Baba in confusion. "What do you mean?"
"Oh come on, haven't you worked it out yet?" Baba replied. "Why do you think they let those little pests run wild? They wanted to keep you and King Piccolo on Earth – long enough for something to happen."
"What?" Frikiza frowned. That didn't make any sense. What concern was it of theirs? "Why do they care if anything happens?"
"Well, I heard that Frieza's hoping King Piccolo will corrupt you." Baba answered. "You know what he's like – he can't bear to be related to somebody so nice. So do me a favour, Frikiza – don't get corrupted."
"Don't worry, I won't." Frikiza replied sceptically. So that was it… It all made sense now. Even the honeymoon suite – that wasn't a mistake made by the hotel staff, it was Frieza! It had to be! Somehow he'd tampered with Frikiza and King Piccolo's reservation – and he'd been the mastermind behind last night! Frieza… That jerk! That meddling, shit-stirring little… Argh! Frikiza had to see him. She had to see him right now!

Frikiza looked up at King Yemma. "If there's nothing else – could I please return to hell, Sir?"
"Yeah sure go ahead, I'm busy anyway –"
"Thank you!" King Yemma couldn't speak another word before Frikiza darted out of the check-in station and headed for hell, disappearing in the blink of an eye.
"Really." Baba sighed, staring after her. "I wonder what Goku is like in her universe."
"Mm." King Yemma nodded, returning to his paperwork. "If she's like that, Goku is probably like Frieza." He said, and he and Baba both shuddered at the thought of such a bizarre universe.