Serena stepped out onto the balcony and dropped to the floor as soon as she got the sliding door closed, her heart was beating wildly and her legs were jelly and she was cursing her dead grandmother for wanting everything to be in New York. She shouldn't have come back here, she and Summer could have done something in LA, New York was filled with memories and heartbreak and an irrational need to be more.
She let out a fast breath of air as she thought about what she was going to do, she really wanted to just pull Summer out of New York as fast as possible and forget this weekend ever happened but she knew that wasn't possible. Her grandmother had a backup plan to reveal secrets Serena knew needed to be told if she herself chickened out. The fact that she knew Blair knew, meant that she was out of time to be the one to tell her loved ones what she needed to.
There was a noise from the side of her and she looked over to see little Henry peeking out of her mother's room entrance to the balcony to look at her, hiding his face when she looked at him. Serena smiled and looked away again, watching the little boy look at her again from the corner of her eye and giggle when he was caught. She played the game with him a few more times before scooting closer and waiting for him to come to her.
"Hi I'm Serena," she said smiling at him. "What's your name?"
"Henry," he said softly.
"That's a very nice name," Serena said and the little boy smiled. "How old are you Henry?"
He seemed to think about it for a moment before holding up his hand and spreading his fingers so she could see them.
"Five?" she asked and he nodded. "Really?"
"Mommy says I'm small for my age," he told her when she looked at him sceptically. "Who are you?"
"I am Grandma Lily's daughter," Serena told him, remembering her mother telling her what he called her and Henry looked up at her confused. "I was your mom and dad's friend when they were little."
"Really?" he asked sitting up straighter and gasping. "You knew them when they were my age?"
"Yep, we used to have a lot of fun," Serena told him.
"Do you know Uncle Nate too?" he asked and Serena smiled automatically.
"Yes, I did," she said clearing her throat. "The four of us were very good friends."
"I never saw you before," Henry said looking very confused.
"I've been away for a long time," Serena said smiling.
"Are you back now?" he asked and Serena let out a breath.
"No," she told him gently. "I'm just here for a little while and then I have to go back home."
"Oh ok," he said looking down at the floor and Serena wanted to tell him that she'd stay for him. This little boy had never met her before but he sounded so sad to know that she was going to leave.
"Henry, there you are," a voice came from behind them and Serena tensed, looking outward to the city. "Come on buddy, your moms looking everywhere for you."
"I found your friend Uncle Nate," Henry told him proudly getting up from his spot next to Serena and walking to his uncle. "And she said she was mommy and dad's friend too."
"Really?" Nate said feigning surprise and the little boy nodded yes. "Why don't you go find your mom and tell her all about it? She's in the lounge where you're supposed to be."
"Ok," he said as Nate dusted the dust from the little boys pants. "Bye Serena."
"Bye Henry," she said turning back to wave at him before he scampered off to find Blair. "He's adorable."
Yeah he is," Nate said coming to sit next to her. "Chuck and Blair's pride and joy."
"Chuck and Blair," Serena said laughing to herself and thinking about who they were now and who they used to be when she knew them. "How did that happen?"
"Well ... I really have no idea," Nate said chuckling and scratching his head. "It just happened and I think everyone was against it, even they were against it but they couldn't fight it and it was probably the best thing that could have happened."
"Don't get me wrong, I love what I've seen so far of Chuck and Blair but I guess I just always thought you and B would still be together," Serena mentioned because that formed such a big reason to why she stayed away all these years and Nate shrugged as if she was missing something. "You don't agree?"
"Henry seems pretty taken by you," Nate said changing the subject and Serena sighed and shook her head, both relieved and annoyed at not getting an answer. "He doesn't usually like new people."
"I'm pretty sure that if Blair had her way Henry would be throwing dirt at my face every time he saw me," Serena mumbled looking away from him and Nate laughed.
"She's just mad that you haven't spoken to her in years and hurt that you avoided her when she tried to reach out," Nate told her. "Blair Waldorf-Bass does not forgive easily."
"She never has," Serena said sighing.
"She forgave me for our break-up," Nate said scratching the back of his head. "Just give her some time and have one of those famous Blair and Serena fights and it'll be like no time has passed at all."
"I wish it were that easy," Serena said looking at Nate. "It's been over a decade, there is so much for us to fight about that I don't think it would be resolved until we're grandparents."
"There's that," Nate said. "You're also both mothers and 13 years more mature than the last time you had problems so maybe it will be resolved faster than that."
"You still have that undying optimism," Serena commented and Nate laughed and dropped his head slightly. "I thought after everything that happened to you, you might have lost it."
"How do you know what happened to me?" Nate asked.
"Gossip girl," Serena told him and he rolled his eyes and shook his head, that was one thing he was glad to be rid of. "And I might have googled you once or twice," she admitted sheepishly.
"That would have turned up some interesting stuff," Nate confirmed bobbing his head up and down as he nodded, his family was all over the news for what seemed like years at one point. "Since I couldn't google you, what have we missed, besides the fact that you have a daughter."
"Summer," Serena said with a smile. "She's basically been my life since I found out about her, there's really nothing else to tell."
"Really?" Nate asked tapping his chin like he was thinking of something. "Did you study after school?"
"I did a few photography courses nothing too long," Serena told him grinning. "You?"
"Grandfather decided on law," Nate said frowning at the choice. "I didn't actually have any other career paths in mind so I went with it."
"I took over from my grandmother in Rhodes Corp," Serena said and Nate looked at her impressed. "I don't do much, I just make sure no-one screws up."
"Still that's a pretty big position," Nate said nodding and Serena smiled and blushed. "What happened to photography?"
"I had to travel alot and I couldn't do that to Summer," Serena told him shrugging, she didn't regret it but sometimes she wondered if Summer would have been fine tagging along when her mother travelled. "What happened to sailing the world on 'The Charlotte'?" she countered.
"Have you met my grandfather?" Nate asked and they both laughed, Serena never knew how anyone said no to that man. "I still go sailing sometimes, clear my head."
"I remember planning the places we would visit on your world tour, because of course I would be there too, I remember we planned it for the year after high school, we were going to take a gap year," Serena said giggling and Nate nodded. "And then Blair would tell us that there was no way that would happen because if we took a year of we would never get back to studying."
"She was right," Nate said thinking about it, it was hard enough getting back into study mode after the holiday before school started, he didn't want to think how much harder it would have been if he took a year of studying. "As usual."
"It was nice to dream," Serena said taking a deep breath and sighing, she dreamt about that made up trip alot when she was younger.
"So, no husband?" Nate asked nudging her and Serena rolled her eyes, that was as subtle as Nate got. "Or bad boy boyfriend?"
"Bad boy boyfriend?" Serena repeated laughing. "I didn't only date bad boys."
"I distinctly remember the guy with the bike," Nate said and Serena shook her head, that guy was an artist and aside from the bike he was annoyingly good. "And that one with all the tattoos," he said and Serena made a face, she couldn't disagree with that one. "And of course, Carter Baizen."
"I think Chuck could have killed me for that one," Serena said and Nate agreed, Carter was not Chuck's favourite person in the world so when someone from his closest group of friends started dating him, Chuck was furious. "If I remember correctly, you were a fan of his."
"He was like this cool older guy who gave me weed," Nate said laughing, Carter and Serena's relationship, if you could call whatever they had one, definitely changed the way Nate looked at him. "I haven't heard from him since you left, did you run away with him?"
"He's not Summer's father if that's what you're hinting at," Serena said laughing at him, she would have loved for Carter to been her escape but when she cut ties with New York, he was cut too. "What about you? And Lola, when did that happen?"
"Lola?" Nate asked like he didn't remember who she was talking about and then cleared his throat because that was an awkward slip of memory. "Yeah, she was working as a cater waiter at one of Blair's parties, Blair almost had a fit when she saw me helping her."
"Yes Nate you were a guest," Serena said mockingly and Nate glared at her. "You're not supposed to get your hands dirty."
"Anyway we found out she was working that job until she was done studying that year, she's pretty cool," Nate said thinking of things to say. "Not at all like what you saw the other day."
"You said it was a crises," Serena remembered, raising an eyebrow at him. "Everything sorted out?"
"I'm not entirely sure," Nate said looking at her as if to judge her reaction to what he was saying. "Her mother is back in town-"
"You don't have to say anymore," Serena said cutting him off, when her mother came to LA to see them she was also on edge and tight-lipped all the time. "I can relate."
"I still can't believe you're back after all these years," Nate told her. "You know at first when you left I was so angry, especially after the way we left it and what was said, then when I realized you weren't coming back I was sad and a little scared and when we tried looking for you and you avoided us I was angry again but that had a lot to do with Summer, didn't it?"
"It did," Serena said sucking in a sharp breath. "It's not that I didn't want to see you and Blair because I missed you so much, it's just that there was so much more at stake and I didn't know how to deal with it, I still don't."
"I'm just ... After all that wondering about where you were and what was going on with you, I'm just really glad you're ok," he told her and Serena blinked back tears because she was expecting all kinds of anger from him. "That wasn't supposed to make you cry."
"I know, I ... You're too good Nate," she said softly wiping her eyes and shivering as she thought about the news she was about to deliver. "I have to tell you something about the time I left and you can't hate me, ok?"
"Serena?" Nate said her name slowly and curiously, standing up because she did and waiting for her to speak.
"Just promise me you won't hate me," she said letting out another breath and Nate furrowed his eyebrows but nodded because t looked like that's what she needed to continue. "I was going to come back to New York, I was ready to face everything that happened but then I got sick and when my grandmother took me to the doctor I found out I was pregnant and I decided then that I was going to keep the baby and I couldn't come back home and no-one could know about her."
"I know this Serena," Nate said almost reaching out to her but she continued to pace, not even registering the worry on his face.
"Nate the baby I had, Summer," Serena said swallowing and telling herself again that this needed to happen. "She's your daughter."
"What?" Nate asked, but the voice that overlapped his was younger and much higher. Serena spun around to see Summer staring at them with wide eyes and her jaw hanging open.
A/N : dun dun dun ... Hey guys here's chapter 6, a little later than I would have wanted it but I was studying and posting fanfiction just completely slipped my mind
This chapter was sort of a starting point when I started this story but it was completely different, for one thing Nate was a very angry person in the original draft and when I read through it again I just hated it so I rewrote everything, added them meeting him at Central Park in the last chapter and I found their almost light hearted NS interaction so much better, I hope you guys agree :)
I seem to have hit writers block and I'm still a little worried about the direction I'm taking this story but your reviews are so amazing and inspiring and I love reading every single one of them, thank you so much for your thoughts
Guys Blake Lively is pregnant! This baby is going to be so gorgeous and Blake has that pregnancy glow and ah I'm so happy for her
Anyway please review and let me know what you think
Until Next Time (^^,)