Chapter 8 One Moment at a Time...

Castiel was having trouble sleeping and looked over at the clock for what felt like the thousandth time in 5 minutes. Dean had left released from the hospital earlier that day and after getting him settled back at home Castiel had headed home. It didn't feel right leaving, but he was also unsure about staying. Sam had said he could, and Castiel thought Dean wouldn't mind but he was also hesitant. He didn't want to do anything to make Dean uncomfortable especially after making some progress with him. Dean was definitely a cuddle bug, but Castiel would never say anything because he could tell that it embarrassed Dean every time they snuggled together. After that first time snuggling up together, Dean would just scoot over in the bed in a silent plea for Castiel to get into the bed with him. Castiel knew his trouble sleeping was due to the fact that he loved snuggling up to Dean and during the week it took for Dean to be discharged, Castiel got used to sleeping with Dean. He was worried that his sub was having the same problem.

Would Dean call if he needed Castiel? He wasn't sure that he would. No. He knew Dean would suffer through it before admitting he needed his Dom.

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Dean was having trouble sleeping. He stared at the clock for a long time just watching time slowly tick by. He turned over away from the clock, but after what seemed like an hour had only been like 5 minutes when Dean finally caved and looked at the clock again.

He was tempted to throw the damn clock across the room and smash it to bits. The only thing really stopping him from doing it was that he knew Sam would be in his room in 10 seconds flat with a sad look of disappointment or some crap on his face.

Dean really didn't want to see Sam's puppy dog eyes at 1 am in the morning. He also didn't want to admit to Sam that he was having trouble sleeping because then he would tell Castiel. And. No. He didn't want Castiel to know he was so used to sleeping with him now that he couldn't sleep now. Dean missed having Castiel curved along his back. The way Castiel held him like he was something precious...

Dean squeezed his eyes shut. He needed to shut his brain up for a while until he went to sleep. Apparently, he needed the sleep meds but he couldn't make his body move. He wasn't able to shut his brain off but his body was too tired to move out of the bed. Maybe counting sheep would work.

One sheep, two sheep, three sheep, four sheep, five sheep, I wonder if Castiel is asleep?

Focus!

Six sheep, seven sheep, I bet he is sleeping like a baby.

I suck. I can't even count freaking sheep!

Maybe if I count backwards...

99 sheep, 98 sheep, 97 sheep. Counting sheep is dumb. Who thought counting sheep would help someone fall asleep?

Dean sat up in bed and glanced around the room. He was going to go downstairs and take a sleeping pill. Quietly. He didn't want to wake up his moose of a brother. He threw back the covers and started toward the door. As he looked into the hall, he was grateful that Sam had placed night lights all through the house. Dean wished he wasn't such a wuss about the dark, but after the pit he was unable to just be in the dark without having flashbacks and panic attacks. Maybe one day he would overcome that particular fear. He tiptoed out into the hall and toward the stairs leading downstairs. Very carefully he stepped down each step cringing when a couple of them creaked. Why was it when you were trying to be quiet that everything seemed to be so stinking loud?

Once he made it to the bottom of the steps, he turned toward the kitchen. Walking silently into the kitchen, he grabbed a glass and turned on the tap. Damn. Even the water was loud. He looked through his pill bottles and found the ones he was looking for, and took one as he gulped the entire glass of water down with it. He placed the glass in the sink. He turned to go back to his room when he totally didn't girly scream at Sam.

Sam had that look. The one that would melt the heart of Death himself. Well, shit.

"Dean, are you ok?"

Dean looked at the floor. "Yeah...um...I was just...thirsty. And I couldn't sleep. So, I came down to get a drink." He looked up and Sam was still staring at him. Patiently staring as he waited. Dean caved. "I also took some medicine. Because I couldn't sleep." Great. Now Sam would definitely tell Castiel that he was having trouble sleeping and then he would figure out that Dean was missing him. Dean hated this.

Sam cleared his throat. "It's ok, Dean. I just wanted to make sure you were ok when I heard you coming down the stairs." Sam walked over to the cabinet and grabbed a glass for himself. After drinking down a glass of water, he headed toward the stairs again. Dean just followed. Sam stopped at his room before going in and watched as Dean headed toward his own room. "Night, Dean. Let me know if you need anything, ok?" Dean nodded as he whispered back to Sam, "Sure thing, Sam."

Dean walked over to his bed and tossed and turned for a bit before he got comfortable. His thoughts drifted back to Castiel as the medicine kicked in luring him gently to sleep.

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Castiel sat at the table with Sam and listened as he described waking up last night to find Dean taking sleep medicine during the night. Which was why Dean was still sleeping in this morning. Castiel was somewhat relieved he wasn't the only one that had difficulty falling asleep while also feeling a sense of failure that he had let his sub down by not being there when he needed him. Castiel told Sam about his own trouble sleeping and when Sam suggested that he go on up to Dean and take a nap he decided that was a good plan.

He walked into Dean's room to find him curled up in the bed sleeping peacefully. Of course, the sleeping meds were helping with the peaceful part. Cas carefully closed his door and stripped out of his shoes and pants. He opted to leave on his shirt and boxers. Since it was well into daylight hours, Castiel turned off the lamp Dean was using for a night light and slipped into bed behind Dean. He snuggled up close to Dean and was asleep within minutes.

When Castiel stirred, he could tell Dean was awake from his breathing. He rubbed his hand up Dean's chest and moved in to breath his scent at the nape of his neck. Dean's heart sped up. Castiel could feel it racing beneath his palm. "Do you want me to get up, Dean?" He didn't want to cause Dean any stress or fear. He felt Dean shake his head no. "Dean, I won't be mad or upset if you need me to move." Again, Dean shook his head no except this time he grabbed Castiel's hand and moved back in a way that caused Castiel to wrap more tightly around Dean. Castiel smiled gently at the knowledge that his sub wanted him to stay wrapped around him. Castiel thought he would try pushing Dean just a little. "Dean, I want you to know that I love sleeping with you. Do you like sleeping with me?" Dean tensed for a moment before he nodded. "Dean, could you please answer me verbally?" Dean turned his face into his pillow. Even though it was muffled it was clear what Dean said.

"I do."

Castiel squeezed him tightly for a moment. "Thank you for answering me, Dean." Castiel rubbed Dean's chest for a moment and continued to breathe in his wonderful scent. "I don't want to sleep without you, Dean. I didn't sleep much at all last night. I know it was because I didn't have you with me. Did you sleep well last night?" Dean shook his head no, then stopped suddenly as he seemed to remember that he was supposed to be answering verbally. "No, sir."

"Do you want me to stay with you here until you move into my house?" Castiel had to force himself to breathe as he waited for Dean's answer.

"Yes, sir." Dean's reply was barely audible as he whispered it into his pillow, but Castiel felt overwhelming emotions fall over him as he held his sub tighter. For the first time, Castiel really felt as though Dean would eventually trust him completely. He just had to take it a moment at a time and show Dean through his actions that he was trustworthy and worthy of everything Dean had to give. Castiel knew it would take time and patience, but he also knew that having Dean's love and complete trust would make it all worth it.

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Dean woke a second time feeling well rested and safe nestled in the arms of his Dom. He wasn't sure if he could trust the feeling, but he really wanted to believe that Castiel truly was a good Dom. Dean thought about their conversation from earlier. He hadn't wanted to admit to wanting to sleep with Castiel, but he was unable to lie to him. Castiel still had Dean wrapped up in his arms and was pressed up behind him. Dean flushed when he realized that Castiel was hard as he was nestled up behind Dean's ass. He didn't dare move, but at the same time he became aware of everywhere Castiel was touching him. His breath on his neck, his chest on his back, his arm draped over Dean's body, his hand oh Lord, his hand was over his chest and his fingers were lightly covering his nipple. Dean's breathing became unsteady as he imagined what it would be like to feel those fingers pinch and caress his nipples. His cock hardened as he continued to think about how it would feel to be touched by Castiel.

Dean wanted to touch his erection, but he didn't dare move. Be still. Be good. Be still. Be good. He chanted a mantra in his head over and over again. He felt Castiel's hips press into his ass but he stayed as still as he could as he repeated the mantra in his head. Castiel's hand twitched like he was going to touch his nipple deliberately. Dean felt Castiel place a gentle kiss to the back of his neck. "Dean, may I please touch you? I promise I will stop whenever you want." Dean was nodding yes before Castiel even finished speaking and gasped loudly when he felt Castiel's fingers brush over his nipple. He repeated the motion over and over again until Dean was begging "please" over and over, but he had no idea what he was begging for and then he realized he was moving his hips trying to find relief for his aching cock.

"What do you want, Dean?" Castiel whispered into his ear in that gravelly voice and Dean wanted to come so badly in that moment that he whimpered as he held his orgasm back. Who knew that being touched could feel so good? All Dean could do was shake his head because he couldn't think. He didn't know what he wanted. Only that he needed Castiel to do something.

He was aware of Castiel asking him a question, but he couldn't focus. He felt Castiel's hand drift lower toward his waistband and when he asked if he could touch him there Dean whimpered out a "yes, please."

Castiel moved his hand slowly until he firmly held Dean in his hand for the first time. It felt so good. It was so much different than his own hand, and he wasn't sure he was going to be able to hold back. He was going to beg even though he didn't want to...it reminded him of..."please, let me come, let me come, please, let me come, sir. Please."

Castiel began to move his hand as he quickly settled on a rhythm. Dean continued to beg, but he didn't have to wait long because the second Castiel spoke "Come for me, Dean," he exploded over Castiel's hand in an orgasm that was more intense than any he had ever had by his own hand. He could feel himself drifting in that post orgasmic state that he has never been able to achieve on his own, but had always heard about when he realized with a start that his Dom was still very hard behind him. He must have tensed up because Castiel rubbed his arm. "Shh. You don't worry about me. I wanted to take care of you. Rest now, then we will get up and get you something to eat."

And Dean obeyed...

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Thanks to everyone for having patience with me and this fic. You know the saying that when it rains, it pours. Well, that has been my life for the last couple of months. I won't bore you with the details. Anyway, I am not abandoning this fic so don't worry about that. This chapter is shorter than the rest, but I just wanted to POST something. I was also ready for some major feels...so this is what happened.