Author's Note
Merry Christmas, and Happy Holidays dear readers! I hope you're all enjoying the time of year. As for myself, well, I don't have any real complaints even though I'm not especially fond of my family. However, I will note that since Christmas Eve is the busier day in my household, and it coincided with a day that I'd normally work on Shuffled, the next chapter isn't nearly as done as I'd like it to be. But fortunately, despite some amount of uncertainty I've been having regarding next week's elimination (and to a lesser extent song), rest assured that it will still be completed in time for its release next Friday.
For those interested, my other story 'Total Drama Rebirth' was updated last Saturday, so check it out if you like competition fics that are a little bit different!
Right now, though, it's on to the reviews.
Elizabeth Fire Ice Heart: Oh, sorry to disappoint you then. I do enjoy really Sammy, but she was never meant to last especially long after her main subplot wrapped up - the only reason I kept her around was pretty much to have her and Dawn be a couple in last week's episode.
Glowing Insanity: Yeah, I'm glad I decided to give Sammy her last stand with the name thing. I was worried it would be a little out-of-nowhere, but I think it worked well. And now Tyler and Ella have a bit of chance to talk, which is good for a number of reasons...which you may see more of shortly. And Blaineley...well, I'm pretty happy with what I've been able to do with her.
acosta perez jose ramiro: Thanks! I'm glad people enjoyed how Sammy got the last word against Chris, at least. And yeah, making Blaineley actually aware that she has outsider knowledge of the game before like the last minute was an obvious choice, and it's disappointing that she didn't do that in canon.
DSX62415: Wow, I'm actually kinda surprised to hear that more than one person wanted Sammy to win. Oh well, sorry to have disappointed you. And as for who does or doesn't make it through this week...well, I'm afraid you'll just have to read on.
CVluvFoxy: ...I'm a little miffed that you decided to use that nickname...
I am happy you're liking pretty much the rest of the cast, though. The dastardly villains teaming up, the newbies getting a little closer, and so on...I hope you enjoy this week's episode.
Animation Adventures: Once again, I'm glad to have made Sammy's elimination ultimately enjoyable for someone. I'm glad I was able to pull off both the exit itself, and the method by which it came about. And...I'll admit, I can see why Sammy going in London instead of Shawn could have been good as well, but ultimately I just couldn't pass up the chance to have Dawn and Sammy get fake-married.
AND speaking of fake marriages, I can kind of see what you mean about Ella and Ezekiel getting paired up, but ultimately I figured that Zeke would be funnier with Blaineley. And yeah, Tyler's not the smartest, but the Customs questions are implied to all be incredibly basic facts about Canada based on the answers, and I actually struggled a bit to decide which one would send Sammy and Dawn back. But I figured, if nothing else, Tyler might know a bit more about a famous Canadian racing ship than those two, so that's how the Customs bit ended up the way it is.
INTeresting predictions as always, and I will say that I've been a little bit uncertain as to how these next few weeks will play out lately (and still am to some extent), but regardless of what happens I hope you'll enjoy the end of the season.
StarHeart Specials: Haha, I probably would have done the same. I'm glad I was able to give Sammy such a good parting, and I'm also happy to hear how many people actually liked her. And...I'll admit that I don't exactly share your love of the original All-Stars, but I will do my best to make it an excellent season.
P. T. Piranha: Hmm...yeah, I can kinda see what you mean about last week being a bit of a breather episode - despite Sammy's blindside, it wasn't as sharply dramatic as Greece or Sweden. And yeah, the pairings for the challenge came pretty naturally, as did Ezekiel basically filling in the 'Owen' role from canon. Still, I'm glad it was enjoyable overall.
AND yeah, believe me, it has definitely been getting harder to decide who I want to eliminate next even with planning ahead so far in advance. Because the thing is, even if you have a general framework that you want to follow at the start you might come up with other ideas that you like more, or that work better with what you've actually written. So you have to be flexible with what you've planned, to an extent at least. But even that won't make some decisions any easier...
StayOuttaMyShed: Yeah, that was kind of my feeling too - Sammy's had a nice, long run, but ultimately I just didn't want to keep her in the game any longer. And about her wedding...who knows? It's a long way off for her, so there's no real reason to think about it just yet. And on my front...well, I don't know if I'll ever write anything relevant to the problem, to be honest.
Ezekiel has been a surprisingly good source of humor this season. He's such an odd character to write, but it looks like I've fleshed him out pretty well while also keeping him consistent and funny. Sugar too, I think. And Tyler's terrible directions were too good to pass up, considering his performance in both versions of you're enjoying Blaineley's expanded role so far, and I hope you enjoy what happens this week. Though based on your predictions, it looks like you'd be surprised by just about anybody getting the boot.
I. M. Poik: Is it wrong that I'm kind of annoyed by how enthusiastic you are about Sammy's departure? Hah. Still, I am happy you enjoyed the chapter. And yeah, this week's elimination(s) may be a little tricky to figure out right off the bat, but I think it'll all make sense by the end.
LadyEnigma888: Huh, I honestly didn't think of the parallels to the Heather-Lindsay scene while I was writing Sammy's elimination, but I can see it now. Neat. And I hope you enjoy both Blaineley and Dawn this episode; you're right about the latter not really having time apart from her two loved ones before now.
OMAC001: Glad you're liking the changes I've made to Blaineley's role in the story, subtle though some may be. And I hope you continue to enjoy her this week.
bruno14: Glad to hear it! I hope you keep enjoying things from here on out, too. Ezekiel's kind of crush on Blaineley is something I figured fit him decently well, though I admit we don't know too much about what kind of woman he's attracted to in canon (since the two girls we see him being attracted to, Bridgette and Anne Maria, are pretty different). Fortunately, though, I think Ezekiel got over Blaineley pretty quickly.
FOWLKON: Yeah, that's what I was going for - she's been a fairly trusting person lately, which ended up causing her downfall at long last. In a way I think it ties in with her decision back in London, though I'm not sure how to explain it right now. And Blaineley, of course, is actually mattering! And she'll matter this week, as well...
As for Staci, yeah, she's gonna be the 'prey' in African Lying Safari. Though you'll have to wait another week to find out how it plays out...
PizzaTheBomb: ...really? The song was barely different from the canon version of 'Blainerific'. Oh well, I'm glad you liked it nonetheless. And more importantly, I'm glad you're loving the fact that Blaineley's actually mattering in terms of plot. You're absolutely right in that Fresh underused her; she was little more than a space-filler in Niagara Brawls and had very little lasting effect in the canon version of this week's episode.
Also glad that you liked the Sammy/Dawn moments! I wanted to give them a nice, sweet experience to wrap up their time competing together this season, and I'm happy it was appreciated.
ljninja: Yeah, but she had to go, and I'm glad I was able to give her such a great ending. I'm also glad you're enjoying how the drama between Tyler, Ella, and Alejandro is going down. I hope you enjoy this week's chapter!
Star Saber21: Yeah, I'm kind of surprised how far Tyler has come, and I'm the one who's been writing him. I think I've still kept his essence, though, or at least tried to. The same goes for Sammy, and I was glad to give her both a nice challenge with her girlfriend and a great parting gesture before she left the game for good. And yeah, just like in canon, you never want to fight on a tightrope.
Knifez: Surprisingly, you're wrong - while some people were definitely expecting Sammy's elimination, a large number weren't or were at least sad to see her go. The challenge...well, there's not much to do with it. As in canon, it's meant to be more of an introduction for Blaineley with a lot of humor derived from the pairings chosen. Nothing jaw-droppingly dramatic, but I think that's fine.
As for your predictions and hopes...well, I don't know what I can say right now other than that I hope you'll enjoy these last few chapters, regardless of what happens.
Joel Connell: Thanks! Though I'm afraid you'll have to wait and see how this week's elimination plays out. I will say, however, that at the moment I don't intend on reusing the same 'trapped in the Drama Machine' gag that canon had, regardless of who ends up in the finale. And yeah, I'm getting pretty excited for the next season as well...
wifishark: Glad you're liking Blaineley's expanded role in this. And yeah, Dawn was the first post-merge boot two seasons in a row, but that trend was never meant to last forever.
And that's it for this...year, technically, as far as review-answering goes. As per usual, the TVTropes page for this series could always use more work, and I greatly appreciate the effort everyone has put into it so far and I look forward to what you all add next.
With the merge having occurred, our cast this week is as follows:
Boys - Alejandro, Ezekiel, Tyler
Girls - Blaineley, Dawn, Ella, Sugar
I hope you're ready, folks, because this Christmas the Shuffledverse is headed to China. Enjoy!
- Fangren
Episode 20 – Chinese Fake-Out
"Last time, on Total Drama World Tour!" Chris opened over a shot of Niagara Falls, the platforms and tightrope used in the second challenge included with the eight cast members already paired up. "Our newlywed couples fell hard for Niagara Falls," he said as Blaineley's actions caused three of the four teams to fall from the rope. "With the teams dissolved alliances were tested," Ella was shown tripping into a kiddie pool while blindfolded, earning a wince from Tyler; "and tempers too!" Sugar cried out in outrage as she accidentally fell off the stage that was being used for the first challenge.
"Fake-marrying our new arrival Blaineley was a confusing experience for Ezekiel," the host said over the opening shots of Blaineley's song, Ezekiel looking confused as he tried to direct her in the first challenge, and struggling to carry her in the second. "While getting to partner with her actual girlfriend didn't do Samey much good," Chris added, putting a bitter emphasis on the cheerleader's unwanted nickname as she and Dawn were shown getting turned away from Chef's Customs booth. "And she was sent home a little sorely," Sammy was shown hitting Chris with her parachute pack, "thanks to Sugar's sneaky work behind the scenes." The recap ended with a series of short clips in quick succession showing the pageant queen talking to Alejandro, then Ezekiel, then Blaineley, and then Sammy.
The scene flashed to a close-up of a wood-burning stove, the host promptly walking by in front of it with a smile on his face. "Who will win? Who will lose? Who will be-"
He stopped when he noticed something, the camera zooming out to reveal Blaineley sitting in his private hot tub in a red strapless bikini. "In my hot tub?!" Chris finished in outrage. "The tub is for hosts only!" he told her.
"I'm a host," Blaineley countered smugly, "watch! Lights, fights, and a whole world of awesome sights," she told the camera with vibrant hand gestures, "right here on Total Drama-" The camera zoomed out quickly, in time with Blaineley's pacing of the title, to show the plane flying to the 'right'.
"OKAY, OUTTA MY TUB!" Chris yelled at her.
xxx
(Fade to Opening Theme)
Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;
You guys are on my mind!
Ya asked me what I wanted to be,
And now I think the answer is plain to see!
I wanna be...famous!
I wanna live close to the sun!
Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!
Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;
I'll get there one day.
'Cause I wanna be...famous!
(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(Fade to Episode)
xxx
The scene opened on Ella sitting at the juice bar in first class, enjoying a piece of a decently-sized wedding cake sitting on the counter. Tyler walked up with a grin on his face, and said "Man, isn't it awesome that we get to enjoy first class together?" He took a seat next to Ella, then waggled his eyebrows and added "Alone...?"
Ella blushed and looked away. "Oh, yes, it is," she answered. "I've never split such a large cake between two people before," she added, looking back at him with a smile before the camera briefly moved over to the cake.
Tyler stared at her blankly for a moment, then swiped a bit of frosting from the cake with his finger and tasted it. "Yeah, I guess," he told her, "but I was talking more like, y'know, the two of us...together..."
Ella sighed sadly. "I know, but...I'm truly sorry, I think we're a great team, but after what happened with Alejandro I'm afraid my heart simply isn't ready for new romance yet."
Tyler hung his head and sighed. "I understand..."
xxx
"I don't understand," Tyler confessed. "I thought that by now, even if she wasn't totally over Alejandro she'd at least be more in to me. I guess she's hurting more than I thought. Or maybe this is just how she takes things, I don't know."
xxx
"Just, y'know, remember that I'm here for you if you wanna, like, talk, or whatever," Tyler said awkwardly.
"Thank you, Tyler," Ella smiled, "I'm glad to hear that."
It was then that the plane's intercom system turned on, and an unexpected voice made an announcement.
"Attention fellow passengers," Blaineley said cheerily as a trendy tune played, "feeling alone in the game? Looking for an ally you can call your own?"
The camera switched over to Alejandro and Sugar in economy class as Blaineley spoke. The pageant queen looked up and scowled, muttering "Now what does she think she's doin'?"
"Consider joining forces with me," Blaineley continued, the shot cutting over to her in the cockpit. "You won't regret it! This promise is not legally binding, offer may be withdrawn at any time." He second sentence was said quickly and under her breath in the manner of the 'fine print' of a commercial, and when she finished she hung the microphone up and turned a smile towards Chef.
"Have you considered helping out a contestant?" she asked.
"I never mess with the game, girlie," Chef told her gruffly.
"Oh, right, you got busted for helping three people last season," Blaineley said. "Shame, really, 'cause I have connections in the TV world, and I've always thought you'd be great on your own show," she whispered into his ear. "Chris is just holding you back!"
Chef raised an eyebrow at her in disbelief.
/
"Honestly, the nerve of that girl," Sugar said with a scowl as the scene cut back to economy class.
"What, jealous that Blaineley has the courage to be blunt about her intentions?" Alejandro asked in amusement.
"Uh, yeah, sure," Sugar said quickly, "of course that's what I meant! In fact, I'm gonna go an' yell at her fer makin' me look bad!" She stood up, then hastily left the compartment.
"Be my guest," Alejandro said as she left. "It's not like her 'strategy' will do her any good! Or you, for that matter," he added under his breath with a sly look.
The camera held on his close-up for a moment before a light cough caused it to rotate around, showing Dawn and an anxious-looking Ezekiel sitting apart on the opposite wall.
"You really shouldn't underestimate Sugar," Dawn warned. "She's much craftier than you realize."
"Please," Alejandro scoffed, "Sugar's not a threat! You're just trying to make her look bad so you don't get voted off next."
"But Sugar's the reason Sammy got voted off!" Dawn tried to explain. "Sugar tricked her into voting for Ezekiel so there wouldn't be a tie!"
"Yeah, like that's believable, eh," Ezekiel told her. "After gettin' tricked by Scott and Scarlett do you really expect us to think she'd go an' trick someone else?"
"I agree," Alejandro chimed in, "I just can't see Sugar doing it – though I will admit I'm curious as to where the vote for Ezekiel came from. Maybe your girlfriend came up with the idea herself, as a way of getting back at Blaineley for causing us to fall perhaps? Or maybe you are the one who voted for Ezekiel," Alejandro accused, "and in your guilt for allowing your girlfriend to be eliminated, you've decided to pin the blame on Sugar?"
"Hey, yeah!" Ezekiel said in outrage. "Sammy isn't here anymore, so how do we even know yer tellin' the truth about who she voted for eh?"
"Why would I lie about something like this?" Dawn asked pleadingly.
"Why indeed?" Alejandro murmured, almost to himself.
"Well I don't know," Ezekiel answered. "But I do know that somebody voted fer me, eh, and that I don't trust either of you two right now." He stood up and stormed out of the room, leaving Dawn to sigh and hang her head and Alejandro to smirk thoughtfully.
xxx
"Sugar may have convinced Ezekiel to vote with us last time," Alejandro mused, "but I doubt she could think of something as complex as preventing a tie. On the other hand, Dawn does tend to be honest about how she sees things, warped though her view of the world is. She's probably just mistaken," he told the camera. "But as I could use her vote right now, perhaps it would be better to play along with her for a little while...," he finished, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.
xxx
"Perhaps you're on to something," Alejandro told Dawn as the scene in economy class resumed. "And at the very least, I can see merit in getting rid of Sugar. Perhaps an...alliance is in order?" he offered with a smile.
Dawn narrowed her eyes at him in suspicion. "What's the catch?" she asked.
"Oh, nothing much," Alejandro admitted, standing up and crossing the aisle to sit next to her. "I mean, I hardly expect either of us to trust each other, especially after you tricked me into revealing my plans to Ella. But still," he continued quickly, "I think we can work out some sort of...temporary agreement. Agreed?" he asked, extending his hand.
"For now," Dawn said, shaking his hand warily. A few deep notes played over a close-up of Alejandro's smiling face.
/
The scene cut to the series' world map as the plane icon flew eastward from Niagara Falls all the way to China, set to a dramatic tune.
Another flash skipped the footage ahead, showing the cast assembled in an open area near the Great Wall.
"Nihao," Chris greeted as some traditional local music played in the background. "Welcome to China! A vast country rich in history, culture, innovation, and, delicious sauces," he said as the camera zoomed in on the group. "Our first challenge is torn from the pages of her history. In 8 Million B.C., King Dim-sum led a battalion of donkey warriors down this very Great Wall."
"Umm, excuse me!" Ella interrupted, earning a mildly surprised look from the host. "I think somebody made just a teensy error when they looked up the local history."
"And that would be?" Chris asked skeptically.
"Umm...everything you just said," Ella admitted bashfully.
xxx
"My mother's family are from Tianjin," Ella explained, "so she made it a point to teach me all about Chinese history. And also the folktales," she added, "which I liked more."
xxx
"We've provided a selection of vehicles to race to our mystery destination," Chris continued without acknowledging the correction, the camera panning across a section of the Wall to reveal the 'vehicles' as a pair of wooden sandals, a donkey, a rickshaw, a tricycle, a bicycle, and a skateboard.
"They're first-come, first-serve," he explained as the camera moved back to him, "it's the Chinese way. Ready?" he said, raising his hand like a flag as a deep chanted note played. "Set!" The seven contestants got into running positions, and Chris' cellphone rang. "I better get this," he told them blankly, pulling it out of his breast pocket and answering it. "McLean here," he said. "Yeah, I'm tryin' to do a show here?"
"Can we go or what?" Sugar asked in annoyance.
"Mm-hmm, yeah," Chris said into the phone.
"Yeah, we go?" Alejandro asked.
"Yeah, can we do this later?" Chris said to the voice on the phone.
"So we go now then," Tyler said.
"Okay, fine!" Chris told the voice on the phone in exasperation.
The seven contestants promptly took off at a run. "Hey, who said you could go?" he called after them. "Yeah well, watch out! There's a few things I was gonna warn you about!" he yelled before grinning and lowering his voice. "But, forget it!" he laughed.
/
The scene skipped ahead to the seven competitors racing up an inclined portion of the wall. Tyler and Ella were currently in front, and the jock told his crush "Hey, we should totally rock the rickshaw! I can pull you, like, all the way!"
"Sorry, lovebirds, but you're gonna have to work for it!" Blaineley taunted as she rapidly came up behind them."
xxx
"I would like to send a shout out to my personal trainer Bunny for making me do all those sprints," Blaineley told the confessional camera. "You rule! Sorry for calling you a waste of skin," she added with an almost bashful expression, "you know that was just the adrenaline talking."
xxx
"Find you own rickshaw!" Tyler told Blaineley as she ran between him and Ella.
"Sorry Blaineley, but I have to agree," Ella added.
"Hai~yaa! Blaineley rebutted, delivering a brutal karate chop that knocked the singer over.
"Ella, no!" Tyler said in worry, stopping in place and allowing Blaineley to get ahead.
xxx
"Also, big ups to my hand-to-hand combat instructor Butchie," Blaineley added, striking a martial arts pose. "You are not a roid monkey, no matter what I said!"
xxx
"What's your problem?" Tyler asked with a scowl, crouching down to help a groaning Ella.
"Nothing," Blaineley replied confidently, "although you two seem to have your fair share of them."
She reached the rickshaw just then, and jumped into it with a cry of "Okay, come and get me alliance buddy!" She paused impishly for a second, then chuckled and said "Oops! What I mean is, if any of you would still like to be in an alliance with me, feel free to pull! I'm a true size 0, fyi," she added as a few deep notes played.
/
The scene flashed ahead to a close-up of the skateboard and bicycle as Alejandro and Ezekiel came upon them nearly out of breath, the homeschooler much more so.
"Ezekiel, I know you don't trust me," Alejandro opened.
"Ya got that right eh," Ezekiel interjected.
"However," the charmer continued, "as a show of good faith, I'll allow you first pick of whichever one you like."
"Err...okay," Ezekiel said, turning a skeptical eye from him to the bike and board. "I guess I'll go with the bicycle, eh," he said," hopping on. "It's faster, plus I know how to ride it."
"A smart choice," Alejandro smiled as he pedaled away before stepping on the skateboard, sending it spinning up into his hands with a darker grin as a dramatic tune played.
xxx
"A small price to pay if it gets Zeke to trust me more," Alejandro confessed, leaning against the restroom wall. "Of course, I did forget to mention the gold medal I won in the South American Skate Olympics."
xxx
"Well that was rude of her," Ella said as she and Tyler walked along together. "I suppose we'll have to use something else then."
"Ooh, like this!" Tyler said, excitedly running over to the tricycle. "Although I guess only one of us can ride it," he said, picking it up with one hand and scratching his head. "You want it?" he offered Ella.
"Oh no, I couldn't," Ella replied. "You got to it first, I'll find something else, like...," she looked around and saw the donkey and pogo stick, "one of those!"
She ran over to them, Tyler right behind her, but frowned when she noticed Dawn coming from the opposite direction. "Oh, I'm sorry," Ella said, "did you want this fine little donkey?" she asked, bending over to pet the uncaring donkey on its head.
"It's okay, you can ride him," Dawn answered with a smile. "I can tell you've always wanted to ride something along the Great Wall, even if you'd prefer a noble steed."
"True," Ella admitted, "but I think he's good enough," she said, referring to the donkey she was petting. Behind her, Tyler raised an eyebrow.
"Hey, uhh, we should probably get going," Tyler said to Ella, setting down the tricycle and getting on it.
"Oh, definitely," Ella smiled to Tyler after mounting the donkey side-saddle. "Will you be okay?" she asked Dawn as she picked up the pogo stick.
"I think so," the moonchild said, a little uncertainly as she started bouncing, her long hair streaming out behind her as she went ahead.
"Good," Ella smiled and nodded. "See you later, Sugar!' she called out amicably to the pageant queen before taking off with Tyler awkwardly at her side.
The camera panned back to Sugar, whose happy smile-and-wave faded into a scowl the moment Ella couldn't see her. "Great," she muttered as she looked down to see the wooden sandals, "all the good stuff's already gone!"
/
The footage flashed ahead to show Sugar on the ground struggling to put the sandals on, until a chuckle from behind her caught her attention.
"Those don't really seem like your style," Blaineley said, still sitting in the rickshaw by herself. "Why don't you just throw those away and pull me instead? We are allies, aren't we?"
"Well, after you went an' blabbed about lookin' fer one on the plane, maybe I wasn't so sure!" Sugar stood up and told her. "Maybe I should just leave you to lose this here race!"
"Come now," Blaineley said with a slightly nervous chuckle, "there's no need for that! I was just trying to see if anyone else was willing to join us, that's all. You have nothing to worry about, trust me."
Sugar scowled at her, then said "Fine. But if you're lyin', there's gonna be trouble, got it?"
"Got it," Blaineley said. "So, are you going to pull me or what? I sure would be grateful to whoever helps me out right now."
"Fine, but only 'cause I don't wanna deal with those dang shoes," Sugar said as she walked over to the rickshaw.
/
The scene moved to a head-on view of Alejandro and Ezekiel racing more-or-less side-by-side down a hill, the charmer having a slight lead.
"How are you doing back there, amigo?" Alejandro asked with an almost taunting smile.
"Pretty good, eh!" Ezekiel replied. "Don't count me out just on account of you bein' pretty good on that board!"
"Of course not!" Alejandro said, looking at the homeschooler as the camera moved to their side and the Wall leveled off. "If this season has taught me anything, it's that you're more talented than I realized!"
"Thanks!" Ezekiel said as he started pedaling faster. "And if this season has taught me anything, it's that you don't pay enough attention when yer feeling confident, eh!" He said as he sped up and passed Alejandro, causing the handsome young man to raise an eyebrow then speed up as well.
The background music became tenser as the camera moved in front of them again, Ezekiel swerving to block Alejandro from passing him. His eyes darted forward and the camera cut to a small landmine-like device lying along the path, then up to the sky as Chris appeared in his helicopter.
"Yo, wanna know what else the Chinese invented?" he called out through his megaphone, just as a smirking Ezekiel swerved again while Alejandro was distracted by the host.
Alejandro was shown unwittingly rolling over the mine with his skateboard, and the resulting explosion was shown from quite a ways back along the wall.
"No...," Alejandro groaned, covered in soot as he feebly rolled his skateboard another few inches, then fell over in a daze.
A few seconds later, Tyler and Ella passed him up on their tricycle and donkey. "Hah!" Tyler laughed, pointing a finger at his rival as they went by. "See you at the finish line, Al!"
Ella sighed. "To think, only a little while ago I would have happily stopped to help him," she said to Tyler. "I was such a fool back then..."
"C'mon, don't be so down on yourself," Tyler said. "You were just, I don't know, following your heart or whatever. You didn't do anything wrong."
"But what if I did?" Ella countered. "You all kept warning me that Alejandro was a bad person, but instead of listening to you I listened to my heart, and that only got me hurt," she explained, unaware that her mount had started to slow down.
"I don't know, I still think you're being too hard on yourself," Tyler told her. "Also, you might wanna start singing again, that donkey's looking pretty tired."
"Oh, right, yes," the singer said with a faint blush of embarrassment, "I suppose Mr. Donkey is a little old." She cleared her throat, then sang "Dear Mr. Donkey, I know you're quite fast! And if you'll still show us, we might have a blast!"
The donkey seemed to perk up at the sound of her song, and happily sped back up again to pass Tyler.
/
The background music became tense again as the scene flashed back over to Alejandro as he angrily skated along the wall. "I can't believe I let myself get so far behind," he grumbled. "I never should have stayed behind to talk to Ezekiel."
It was then that he heard the sound of heavy panting accompanied by Blaineley's cheers of "You can do it!"
Alejandro sighed and allowed himself to slow down. "And now another distraction," he muttered to himself. "Although at least this might be worth something."
He turned around, then skated over to the rickshaw that was coming up from behind. "Greetings, ladies!" he said with a handsome smile.
"Hi Alejandro," Blaineley replied with a flirtatious smile. "Can I just say that it was a pleasure working with you on the last vote."
"Believe me, the pleasure was all mine," Alejandro told her, circling around the rickshaw to put himself alongside them heading in the same direction. "Still, I am surprised to see the two of you working together. You're not trying to form an alliance behind my back, are you?"
"Why would I do that for?" Sugar answered between heavy breaths. "I just figured that since you went on ahead with Zeke fer some reason, I might as well stick back an' help Blaineley out. Who knows, maybe we can make her a permanent part of our alliance!"
"Ooh, that sounds like a great idea!" Blaineley said. "If it's an alliance with you two then count me in."
"Excellent!" Alejandro smiled. "I apologize for doubting your intentions, Sugar," he told the pageant queen. "I've been getting...paranoid, lately, with my position in the game being so poor." He gave his ally a charming smile, but she just huffed and looked away to hide her blush.
"Well, if you'd like to make up for it," Blaineley told him, "I'm sure Sugar wouldn't mind you taking her place pulling me. I know I wouldn't mind."
"Well, I am gettin' pretty tired pullin' your 'size zero' butt around," Sugar mused. "Maybe a switch wouldn't be a bad idea!"
"As much as it pains me to say it, I must decline," Alejandro said sadly. "I would not want the two of you to have to be seen with me, it might make the others angry. I'll have to make it up to you some other time. Adios!"
"Aww, too bad!" Blaineley said with an exaggerated pout as the charmer sped off.
"Yeah," Sugar grunted in annoyance.
/
The scene flashed to Dawn, hopping along on her pogo stick with nobody else in sight.
She sighed to herself. "Well, I guess it's last place for me then," she said aloud. "Hopefully the penalty won't be too great." She heard and saw an explosion far off in the distance along the wall, raised her eyebrows, then looked skyward and said "Oh Earth Mother, please let that have been Blaineley and Sugar!"
/
It had, in fact, been Tyler who'd hit the mine, as revealed when the camera cut to him in a smoldering crater, lying on his back in a daze with the tricycle a few yards away.
"Oh no, Tyler!" Ella said in concern, patting her mount on the neck and getting him to stop so she could slide off. "Are you alright?" she asked, running to his side and helping him up.
The jock coughed out a bit of soot, then said "Yeah, I think so."
Just then, Alejandro rolled past the two looking surprisingly tired. "Hah!" he taunted as he skated past. "See you two at the finish line!"
Tyler and Ella scowled as he rolled out of sight.
/
Another flash took the scene back to Blaineley and Sugar, the pageant queen dripping with sweat.
"Come on Sugar, you can do it!" the older blonde cheered. "Show 'em some girl power!"
"Would you shut up?" Sugar panted. "Why don't you try pullin' fer a change?"
"Pull? Moi?" Blaineley replied in disbelief. "I'm almost flattered that you think I can do it, but trust me: I do not have the upper body strength to pull the cart and you."
"Well," Sugar panted, looking dazed and exhausted as she started to stumble, "you ain't gonna have a choice pretty soon."
"Sugar?" Blaineley asked in rising panic. "That was just a joke, right? Sugar?"
The camera panned back to the pageant queen, who had a far-off look in her eyes, then down to her stumbling feet just as she stepped on a mine. She wailed in terror as she was sent flying off backwards into the air, and Blaineley bit her lip as she watched.
"Well now how am I gonna get to the finish?" she asked aloud.
/
The scene moved to the sky, where Chris was flying his helicopter. "Anybody who survives," he called out over his megaphone, "meet me at the finish!" He smiled and turned his attention to the camera. "There's more bombs to come, plus, free fortune cookies with every take-out entree. Right here, on Total! Drama! World Tour!"
Sugar flew by screaming below the helicopter as the camera zoomed out while the season's title was dropped.
(Fade to Commercial and Back)
The episode resumed on a shot of Chris standing next to a finish banner set up on top of the Wall. "Welcome back to Total Drama," he told the camera, "where our contestants are in a mega-tough race down the Great Wall of-" he gasped and looked towards the path as a warning cry came.
"LOOK OUT!" Ezekiel shouted, just before he came barreling through on his bike. Chris quickly jumped out of the way by going over the battlements, and Ezekiel skidded to a stop a few seconds after. He wiped the sweat from his brow, "then looked around and smiled. "Hey, I guess I won!"
"Congratulations," Alejandro told him, nearly out of breath as he rolled up past the finish line just then. "You were a...worthy competitor. You've earned your prize."
"Actually," Chris told them as he hauled himself back up into view on the edge of the battlements, "there is no prize for first."
"What?!" Alejandro and Ezekiel exclaimed together.
"If you had waited for me to say the rules," the host told them, "anybody who makes it over the line before the gong rings," the shot zoomed out to show a large gong standing nearby, "gets to join me for a very special lunch. Aka, the next part of the competish!"
"Well, I guess I still won at least," Ezekiel admitted.
"And I don't feel as bad for letting it happen," Alejandro added.
The sound of hoofbeats caught the three men's attention, and the camera cut to the finish line as Ella crossed.
"Oh my, I can't believe we made it!" she said cheerfully, scratching her happy-looking donkey on the head. "And it's all thanks to you, Mr. Donkey," she told it sweetly. The sound of squeaking wheels got her attention in turn, and she turned her smile back towards the finish line. "We did it, Tyler! Isn't that fantastic?"
"Yeah," Tyler told her, still covered with a fine layer of soot, "but watch out!" Ella gasped and realized she was still right in his path, and backed up flush against her donkey friend. Tyler was still forced to swerve around her, however, and hit a bump in the road that caused him to fly over the handlebars of his tricycle and tumble along with it all the way into the gong. "Ohh man," he chuckled, shaking the ringing from his ears, "that was extreme. So who came in first, anyway?"
"I did, eh," Ezekiel raised his hand. "But-"
"Awesome, guy!" Tyler said, bounding over to give his friend a high five. "What did you win?"
"Nothing," Chris repeated irritably. "Which you would have known had you let me announce the rules."
"Oh," Tyler said blankly. "I guess we managed to beat Blaineley at least," he told Ella who nodded happily.
"Sorry to disappoint the two of you," the woman herself spoke up, bringing the attention of all to the rickshaw standing a little ways away, "but I got here right before you did."
"Err, how?" Ezekiel asked in utter astonishment. "I coulda sworn you weren't there a second ago."
"And where's Sugar?" Alejandro asked. "I thought she was pulling you!"
"How I got here is my little secret," Blaineley answered smugly. "A good reporter never reveals her sources, after all."
/
The scene flashed to a large well-decorated just as Chef Hatchet lied down onto a clothed table, breathing and sweating heavily. "Man, this plan better be worth it," he announced before flopping down in exhaustion.
/
A long, hollow sound started to play as the shot moved back to the challenge, the camera focusing on a close-up of the gong mallet. "Okay people," Chris announced as he grabbed the mallet, the shot zooming out as he readied his swing, "it's time to-"
A faint and rhythmic boing got his attention, and the camera cut to Dawn bouncing up on her pogo stick. "Wait!" she called out. "I'm almost there!"
The rest of the cast was shown, Ella and Tyler smiling happily while Blaineley, Sugar, and Alejandro watched with disinterest. Ezekiel, however, made a brief grunt of annoyance that only Tyler seemed to notice and raise an eyebrow at.
Dawn crossed the finish line, and Chris rang the gong. "Yes! Thank you so much!" she told the host as she bounced up to him, earning an impish smile in response.
/
The footage skipped ahead, the six contestants still in the challenge now seated at the very table Chef had flopped down on earlier. From left to right were Blaineley, Dawn, Ezekiel, Tyler, Ella, and Alejandro, with Chris standing in front of the empty far right end.
"To win today," the host began, "you'll have to eat more than everybody else at this totally awesome Chinese restaurant."
"Awesome!" Tyler cheered. "I love Chinese food, and an eating contest is no sweat. Bring on the wontons, bro!"
"Except," Chris interjected over the jock's last few words, "this is the world's most authentic Chinese restaurant," he explained as the camera panned over to him and a paixiao played in the background. "You'll be enjoying real street food delicacies!" Alejandro's brow shot up in alarm. "Deep-fried grasshoppers, kung pao larvae," the host began to list off with a smug smile, causing the handsome young man to nearly retch.
"Oh my," Ella said, bringing a hand to her mouth in shock before smiling in realization. "I forgot, you have a weak stomach, don't you Alejandro?" she taunted the heartbreaker. "Too bad, I guess you won't be able to win invincibility..."
Alejandro swallowed, then turned a dry look towards the singing princess. "Oh? And what makes you think you'll do any better?"
It was then that Chris' cellphone rang again, and he answered it with a quick motion and an irritated look. "Yo, it's McLean," he said tersely before walking off. "Yeah...I'm trying to make a show here?"
The contestants watched him leave, then Alejandro and Tyler turned their attention back to Ella. "You were saying...?" Alejandro asked.
"I happen to have had authentic Chinese street food before," she told her former crush in an almost haughty tone. "In fact, my dear mother and her family make it all the time! I can handle whatever we get served!" She smiled proudly, as did Tyler, while Alejandro merely scowled.
xxx
"I maaaay have told just a teensy little fib back there," Ella confessed in a whisper with the smile of a child who knows she's been naughty. "True, my mother's recipes are authentic, but I haven't had any of the really exotic stuff in years. But Alejandro doesn't need to know that."
xxx
"Well then, aren't you lucky," Alejandro told her in a snide tone. "Especially since Sugar didn't make it, she'd be a shoe-in to win this if she were here!"
"What's this about me bein' the obvious winner?" the pageant queen herself asked, the camera zooming out to show her standing to the right with a few blotches of mud on her.
"Hi, Sugar!" Ella waved happily, not noticing the pageant queen's immediate scowl.
"It's a relief to know you're alright," Alejandro told her. "But I must know, what happened to you?"
Sugar shrugged. "Got blown up an' landed in a pig pen. They were some fierce hogs, but they weren't no match fer Sugar," she explained, pounding her fist at her name. "Now are ya gonna tell me what y'all are doin'?"
"It's a Chinese street food eating contest," Ella explained.
"Aww, for real?!" Sugar said in shock and dismay. "Shucks, I've been lookin' forward to this all season and now I missed it!"
"Truly, it is a tragedy that you aren't able to compete," Alejandro said, patting her on the back as she slumped over.
"Okay," Chris said, closing his phone and walking back over. "You have to eat each bowl of delish food," he said, walking past the seven contestants including Sugar on the end, "opening your mouth to prove it went down. If you're last to finish, or you puke, you go sit with Sugar on the loser bench."
"Who you callin' a loser?" the pageant queen spat angrily.
It was then that Chef walked past pushing a cart with six bowls on it; each contained a rectangular block of something with layers, but while five of the meals were a dull greenish-gray color the last had a pinkish tint to it. The bowls were placed in front of each contestant as Chef passed them, with the pinkish one going to Blaineley. He nodded curtly at the woman, and Blaineley winked back.
"Looks simply scrumptious, Chef!" she told him as he moved off-screen.
One of the other pieces of street food made a sick squelching sound as it was picked up by a pair of chopsticks, the camera zooming out to reveal them in the hands of Dawn. "Oh my, this isn't meat is it?" she asked worriedly.
She was answered by a familiar ding and the music note icon spinning into the lower-right corner of the screen. "Allow me to begin today's number," Chris said, leaning into the shot with a wide grin on his face.
~/~
[Colorful stylized clouds of purple, pink, and green drifted across the screen as an elegant sizhu ensemble piece began to play. The clouds dispersed to reveal a backdrop of tall, stylized mountains and Chris rose up in center-screen. He had appropriated a traditional Chinese opera costume for his own use – a light blue robe with red trim, a long black beard, an ornate headdress, and a face painted pink and white. He had started singing even before making his appearance.]
"A little Chinese lesson for you~! Manman chi means 'Enjoy your meal'!"
"Manman chi, it's no raw deal!"
[The six still in the contest sang together, floating wide-eyed and cross-legged in mid-air before the table rose up to their level and they looked at their respective dishes.]
"Please tell me this isn't eel...," Dawn groaned, the music fading out and the scene cutting back to the real restaurant as the animal-lover gave another hesitant look at her piece of mystery food.
~/~
"It's donkey meat!" Chris revealed. "Local delicacy."
A dramatic note played as the camera panned across the faces of the six contestants as they viced their disgust. "I can't eat this!" Dawn declared, standing up dramatically. "It was a poor, defenseless creature!"
Blaineley, sitting next to the moonchild, promptly tossed her own different-looking donkey meat into her mouth, chewed it, and swallowed without issue. "Mm, delicious!" she said, opening her mouth to prove to Chris that she'd eaten it.
Ezekiel, Ella, Tyler, and Alejandro were all shown chewing as well, the weak-stomached charmer having the most difficulty.
"Done!" Ella announced, cheerily opening her mouth to prove it.
"Done!" Tyler followed moments later.
"Done, eh!" Ezekiel finished.
The three looked to Alejandro, who was clenching his eyes shut in disgust and muttering "Sólo es carne...sólo es carne..." to himself.
Ella and Tyler turned their heads back towards Dawn, and Tyler said "Hurry! You gotta beat him!"
"Not really, eh," Ezekiel muttered bitterly to himself, the remark going unnoticed by his friends but not by Blaineley, who smirked slyly.
"I'm sorry, friends," Dawn said, shaking her head sadly and putting her donkey meat back in the bowl, "but I can't."
Alejandro finally swallowed, shuddered, and announced "Done!" He opened his mouth, and sure enough it was empty.
"Dawn, you're out!" Chris told the mystic with a taunting smile, unaware of the pudgy hand reaching up from behind the table and snatching the donkey meat from Dawn's bowl. "Loser bench!" Dawn groaned and hung her head as the host pointed her to the side.
/
Dawn was shown taking her seat further down the table, casting a sharp glare at Sugar who seemed to be readjusting herself in her seat, before noticing the girl and returning the glare and also, for reasons unknown, chewing.
/
A close-up was shown of the next dish being presented in bowls to the five remaining players; the first four received heaping helpings of brown, segmented, larvae-like somethings, while Blaineley received a heaping helping of spaghetti and meatballs.
"Mmm, smells delicious, Chef!" she remarked coolly, to which the hulking man merely snickered mischievously.
~/~
[The return of the sizhu music and more stylized clouds blowing across the screen signaled the song's resumption, and Chris once again rose into the center of the mountainous backdrop in full costume.]
"Manman chi means 'bon apetite'!"
"Manman chi, what do we have to eat?"
[The five remaining sang together, the table and dishes once again rising up to meet them in mid-air.]
A close-up was shown of the meal squirming around in the bowl in front of Alejandro, the camera panning up to show him looking utterly horrified. "Why's it still moving it's feet? It's hundreds and hundred of," he paused to shudder as the music cut out, "feet."
~/~
"Live meal worms," Chris explained. "Local delicacy!"
Another sharp dramatic note played as four of the remaining players shuddered in disgust and/or watched their food crawl around, but once again Blaineley was having no problems at all.
"Wow, Chef, five stars, mmm!" she remarked, having already finished her meal.
"You can't be serious?" Alejandro said, struggling to even bring one of the meal worms to his mouth. "Are you actually enjoying this?"
Blaineley shrugged happily, then said "Done!" and opened her mouth wide.
"Done!" Tyler chimed in moments later, looking slightly queasy.
"Done!" Ezekiel added, and the camera zoomed out to show Ella still chewing, and Alejandro who had only just put the first in his mouth.
It was no surprise when Ella was the next to swallow and call out "Done!"
Chris leaned in to check his open mouth, then swung around to smile tauntingly at Alejandro. "Alejandro, you're out! Loser bench!"
The handsome young man replied with a stream of projectile vomit that coated Chris' face quite well. He groaned, then stood up from the table, unaware of the hand reaching out and swiping his leftovers.
/
He was shown taking his seat at the loser bench moments later, and joined Dawn in giving Sugar, who was still chewing, a suspicious glance. The pageant queen just looked at them, shrugged, and looked back towards the challenge, still chewing away.
/
~/~
[The colorful clouds crossed over the screen once more, and for a third time Chris rose up in front of the mountainous backdrop in full costume as the song resumed.]
"Manman chi, it's dinner for four!"
"Manman chi, we've got room for more!"
[The four remaining sang, their meal this time revealed to be what looked like green and crispy starfish on skewers – except for Blaineley's, whose skewer seemed more like steak and potatoes.]
"I think I'm almost done for...," Tyler sang, holding up his skewer with dread.
~/~
"Starfish on a skewer," Chris said eagerly. "Local delicacy!" Chef nodded happily, and another dramatic tune played as Ella, Tyler, and Ezekiel cringed and took their first bites.
Blaineley, meanwhile, had already finished once again. With a long drawn out "Mmm...," and a wink at Chef she slid the empty skewer out of her mouth, then opened it wide. Chris shared a knowing smirk with Chef, and the big man giggled.
"D-done," Ella said with a forceful shudder, swallowing and opening her mouth to prove it.
The camera moved to Ezekiel and Tyler, both of which had eaten the majority of their starfish. "C'mon, I can do this," Tyler told himself. He clenched his fist, shoved the rest of the starfish in his mouth, and began to chew.
"Done!" a voice to his right said, and the jock opened his eyes in shock. The camera panned over to Ezekiel, who was having his open mouth inspected by Chris.
"Tyler, you're out!" the host announced. "Loser bench!" The jock groaned and hung his head, then coughed up a starfish arm.
/
Tyler took his spot next to Alejandro further down the table and immediately noticed that both his rival and Dawn were giving odd looks to Sugar, who in turn was looking with annoyance at Tyler himself – and no longer chewing.
"Uhh, did I miss something?" Tyler asked in confusion.
/
A tense, trilling note played over a close-up of the next dish sitting in front of Ella: a bowl of green mush, with a pair of purplish tentacles and an eyestalk coming out of it. Ella was looking extremely uncertain about it, and the shot cut over to Chris and Chef.
"Yeah, we don't even know what that's called," Chris admitted. "It ain't right whatever it is."
~/~
[The music resumed once more, bringing the colorful clouds and mountain backdrop with it. As usual, Chris sang the next line.]
"Manman chi, don't get the squirts!"
"Manman chi, we'd rather eat our shirts!"
[The remaining three sang together again, though Blaineley's dish looked far more like a bowl of ice cream with a little parasol sticking out of it than the tentacled mush that Ezekiel and Ella had.]
"Hey, hold on!" Tyler interrupted, bringing the song to a halt.
~/~
"Why does Blaineley's food look so much better?" the jock asked to a dramatic beat, rising from his seat in outrage.
"It's exactly the same!" the older blonde countered quickly, at exactly the same time as Chris' cellphone ringing yet again.
"Listen, man!" he answered irritably, walking away from the table.
"And what was Sugar eating earlier?" Dawn spoke up to another dramatic note, standing up and pointing an accusing finger at the pageant queen.
"Hey, lay off!" Ezekiel countered. "She didn't do nothin' wrong, eh!"
"Yeah!" Sugar added with a nod. "All I did was take the leftover Chinese food the rest of y'all didn't want!"
The confession stunned the others for a second, prompting Tyler to cringe and say "Dude, that's gross..."
"What, I was hungry!" Sugar said in defense.
"As...disgusting as that may be," Alejandro said, standing up and moving around the table, "it's not technically against the rules. However, none of that changes the fact that Blaineley, at least, might be cheating." He gave the older woman a suspicious glance, which seemed to surprise her. "Chris," the charmer called to the off-screen host, "what are you going to do about our accusations?"
"Yeah, okay, budget, blah blah blah," the host said, currently absorbed in his phone conversation. "What am I supposed to do?"
"I suggest you start by paying attention to the show you're supposed to be hosting," Alejandro said sharply, causing Chris to look at him and end the call. "Somebody has been giving Blaineley regular food instead of the same disgusting dishes the rest of us had to eat."
"Yeah, I know," Chris said plainly before being interrupted by Blaineley.
"GET OVER I-" she yelled before registering what Chris had said. "Wait, what?"
"Yeah, Chef told me about the little alliance you tried to make with him," Chris explained with a sharp look at the woman. "So I decided to give him the go ahead to play along long enough to deliver a little punishment."
The camera panned over to Chef, who was cackling eagerly. "Ohh, I'm sure you loooved the food I made specially for ya, girly," he told his 'ally'. "But I don't think you're gonna love the secret ingredients I added. Who knows when they'll kick in," he finished with a cackle.
"Now listen, we gotta wrap this up," Chris said. "So, here's the dealie-o. One last round, whoever wins has invincibility in tonight's vote and they get to take the person of their choice up to first class with them."
"And what of Blaineley's special meal?" Alejandro asked.
"It stands," the host said. "Between what she's already eaten and what's in her bowl right now, I'd say she's got as much unpleasantness in her future as Zeke and Ella."
A dull note played as Blaineley's face dropped, and her stomach rumbled ominously.
"Now let's get this done," Chris said.
~/~
[The sizhu music and the clouds and the backdrop all returned, but this time it was the three remaining players who led the song.]
"Manman chi, manman chi~i..."
[They sang nervously as they looked at their meals, with Blaineley noticeably off-key.]
"They love to eat on the Yangtze!"
[Chris sang next, reappearing in full costume.]
"Manman chi, manman-huh?"
[Chris continued over a shot of the main dish, it's eye still moving and its tentacles squirming. The host only stopped when he heard Blaineley gag, followed shortly by Ella and Ezekiel. The camera pulled out to show that both teens had actually decided to go for it and chug their mystery meal down as fast as possible; Blaineley took one look at them, then vomited.
Seconds later, Ella swallowed and Ezekiel vomited as well.]
"Looks like it's my victory, Tyler you're with me!"
[Ella sang weakly, looking rather haggard. Tyler grinned and pumped a fist in excitement, then looked alarmed. The camera cut back to Ella as her cheeks bulged, and she leaned back to vomit as well just as the music ended.]
~/~
/
The 'Gilded Chris' theme, of all musics, played over the transitional shot of the plane in flight. At its end, the scene cut to Alejandro and Dawn walking alone together through one of the plane's hallways.
"Listen," Alejandro whispered to the moonchild, "I understand that you want to vote out Sugar, but you won't have enough votes!" Dawn raised an eyebrow at him. "Vote Blaineley instead – I'm fairly certain she's Sugar's main ally right now, and after what she tried to pull today you may be able to convince Tyler or Ella to vote with us!"
Dawn pursed her lips in skepticism. "Why should I believe you?" she whispered.
"Because I know how this game works," he answered. "And besides, this is the only way for you to get back at Sugar for getting your girlfriend voted out!"
Dawn peered closely at him for a moment as they walked, then let out her breath and looked ahead. "Very well. I'll vote for Blaineley."
/
The footage skipped ahead, showing Dawn and Alejandro arriving at the end of a line of the other contestants all waiting outside the confessional bathroom. Ella and Tyler were directly ahead of Dawn, followed by Ezekiel and Sugar at the front with Blaineley presumably in the bathroom.
"Excuse me," Dawn whispered, getting the attention of Ella and Tyler. "I know this may sound odd, but I think we should-"
Her words degenerated into indecipherable mumbles as the music turned ominous and the camera panned ahead to Ezekiel shooting a dirty look towards the back of the line.
He looked back towards the front, then nudged Sugar. "Hey, we're still gonna vote Dawn, right?" he asked her. "I just can't get over what she's been sayin' aboot-"
"Say no more," Sugar replied with a smile and a wink. "The two of us are stickin' together, an' I asked Blaineley to vote fer her too."
Ezekiel smiled as the music hit its peak, but both fell flat as a loud fart pierced through the bathroom door, causing the six outside it to pinch their noses and cringe.
/
A flash took the scene to a close-up of one of the tiki-like statues in the elimination chamber, the camera panning left and a little bit down across the seven contestants as they awaited their fate – Ezekiel and Sugar and Alejandro in the top two rows; Ella and Tyler below Ezekiel; Blaineley in the bottom left corner looking rather sick, and Dawn in the bottom right.
During the pan, Chris could be heard counting the votes in a rather nasally voice. "Blaineley, Dawn, Blaineley, Dawn, Alejandro, Blaineley!" The shot reached him just as he tossed the sixth vote aside and the music became tense, revealing the host to be pinching his nose as he held the passports at arm's length. "And, the final vote goes to...Dawn," he announced, revealing the stamped face on the final passport. "It's a tie!"
"Very well," Dawn sighed, calmly standing up. "Bring on the tiebreaker, so that the Earth Mother's will can be done." She ended with a pointed look at Blaineley.
Chris' cellphone rang yet again, but host merely hung up with a single button and tossed it over his shoulder. "The producer's breathing down my neck, and I'm gettin' a lot of flack on this budget stuff," he explained as dramatic music began to build. "So, I was thinking, why don't you both take off?" He held up a pair of tattered parachute packs and grinned.
"What?!" Blaineley and Dawn exclaimed together, the latter rising from her seat. They were answered by the parachute packs getting tossed into their arms.
"But wait," Dawn said as the sombre elimination theme began to play, "how is eliminating both of us going to help save money?"
"Weight on the plane, food budget, I don't know," Chris answered with an uncaring shrug. "I just don't like either of you."
"Well then friends," Dawn proclaimed as Chef herded her and Blaineley towards the exit, "before I go, I must warn you all of a great evil lurking on this plane! And I'm not talking about Alejandro."
The shot cut to the remaining cast, Alejandro looking amused while Sugar and Ezekiel looked annoyed and Ella and Tyler just looked confused. The camera cut back to the two women as they reached the door; Dawn raised a finger and took a breath, but Blaineley cut her off by slapping a hand over her mouth.
"Not so fast, I'm getting the last words here," she said angrily. "Staci? She's hiding in the hold! Ella, Sugar hates your guts, get a clue!" The shot cut to Sugar looking surprised, then narrowing her eyes hatefully at Ella, who was looking at the pageant queen with tears in her eyes.
"And speaking of Sugar," Blaineley continued, immediately getting the pageant queen's wide-eyed attention again, "she's been playing all of you! She's not as stupid as she makes herself seem, and she's not sorry about teaming up with Scott and Scarlett. Heck, if anything she was totally into it!" Ezekiel and Tyler gasped. "Not only that, but she's the only one who ever laid eyes on that letter Dawn left." The moonchild herself gasped.
"Hey, uh, can you get her outta here already?" Sugar asked, trying not to look panicked.
"I don't know," Chris said with an impish smile, "this part's kinda fun."
"Oh you wanna hear something really fun?" Blaineley replied in her own impish tone, the sombre music starting up again. "They wanted me to host the show. You only got the job 'cause I said no, and-"
Chris cut her off there, charging forward and shoving the two eliminated girls out the open door with a scream. The shot cut to the Final Five, four of whom were giving Sugar unhappy looks as the plane's side door closed.
"Uhuhuh," she chuckled awkwardly, "did it just get awfully quiet in here or what?" She received no answer, and her chuckles petered out.
/
The scene cut to first class, a sad tune playing as the camera panned to the couch where Ella was sitting, hugging her legs while Tyler sat beside her and tried to comfort.
"Sugar hates me?" Ella said sadly. "Sugar hates me? That can't be true!"
"I...think it is," Tyler admitted, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. "And I guess she lied to all of us about a lot of things..."
"I mean, I know I haven't spent much time with her since I broke up with Alejandro," Ella continued, apparently ignoring Tyler's comment, "but I didn't think she'd hate me for it!"
"Uhh..I don't think that's-" Tyler tried to say before Ella interrupted him with a hug and a sob.
"Oh, Tyler," she said. "First Alejandro, and now Sugar? Does everybody secretly hate me?"
Tyler sighed a little, then patted her on the back. "Well," he told her, "I know I don't."
/
A flash moved the scene to the cockpit, where Chris slammed his fist down on the console in irritation. "Ya know, this is very serious, Chef," he told his assistant.
"Uhh...what is serious exactly?" the pilot asked.
"I was first choice for this gig, right?" Chris asked desperately.
"Uhh, of course you were!" Chef answered quickly.
"Yeah, right," Chris said in forced relief, laughing awkwardly and adding "There's no show without me! Watch this."
He turned to the camera and spread his arms as the capstone theme began to play. "Five contestants! One million dollars! And a whole bunch of the world left to mess up! Join us next time, on Total! Drama! World Tour!"
The footage lingered on the furthest zoomed-out shot of the plane, and Chef said "Heh, it is way better when you do it..."
(Fade to Credits)
/
/
/
[Bonus Clip]
The bonus footage opened on Dawn falling through the air, her hair streaming out above her. "Well, that could've gone better I suppose," she told the camera with a light sigh. "At least everybody knows to be wary of Sugar, even if it was only because Blaineley's seen more of the season than we have."
"Hey," the woman in question said, the camera zooming out to show her falling nearby, "they believed me because I actually have credibility, unlike you."
"Oh, you can't fool me, Blaineley," Dawn countered calmly, "I know you know that's not the case. Just like you've always feared, nobody actually takes you seriously without good reason once they know you. It's why you always try so hard to push others away!" Dawn told the older woman with a piercing yet concerned look.
"I-wha-that's not even-," Blaineley spluttered before switching to outrage. "How did you know that? And don't pull that 'aura-reading' crap with me."
"But it's true!" Dawn told her. "It's right there in your aura, between your frustrations about your lack of inner happiness and the jealousy you feel towards, well, just about everyone!"
"Hmmph," Blaineley scoffed, "like you don't have issues of your own. The moment we get back to Canada, I'm gonna dredge up every last bit of dirt on you I can find and air it all on the Aftermath." She gave the younger woman a haughty, mocking look but was dismayed by Dawn's lack of reaction.
"Fell free to try," Dawn said with a calm shrug. "But first, you might wanna open your parachute."
"Huh? Oh, right," Blaineley said before absentmindedly pulling the cord on her pack, Dawn doing the same.
Neither parachute opened.
"Have I mentioned how much I hate this show?" Blaineley grunted before her cheeks abruptly bulged again.
"Yes," Dawn replied.
The camera zoomed out quite a ways to show the area they were falling towards – a rural village, by the looks of it, with the Great Wall running along in the distance.
Dawn screamed, and Blaineley vomited.
Author's Note - Post Script
As could be expected, I decided to keep the double elimination - but that's not to say this week's episode isn't different in other ways. For one thing, Blaineley is still more relevant than she was in canon - her cheating subplot is still technically there (though it backfired), plus she also got to have more interactions with Sugar, Alejandro, and even a little bit with Ella and Tyler. Not only that, but her parting speech accomplished far more than merely telling Sierra something she never really acts on, and possibly making Heather and Alejandro more aware of their mutual attraction. Sugar's game has been blown open, but you'll have to wait a week to see what will happen because of it.
And, of course, we say goodbye to Dawn as well. I'll admit that I'm sad to see her go as well, but it's just what I felt had to happen. In the end she wasn't able to convince people of Sugar's evil directly, but by helping Alejandro get rid of Blaineley she at least did so indirectly. I hope all her fans are satisfied with her exit. And, I think, even more so by her bonus clip...
As for the challenge...well, Alejandro and Blaineley taking the same vehicles as canon made sense to me. Ezekiel I decided to give the bike too, mostly as a way for Alejandro to try (and fail) to get on his good side. Sugar I knew was going to have to spend a good amount of time with Blaineley, meaning she ended up getting (and abandoning) the last-choice shoes. I liked the idea of Ella riding the donkey with Tyler on the tricycle alongside her, meaning Dawn was left with the pogostick (the mental image of which is surprisingly cute to me).
Sugar ended up getting blown away primarily because I didn't want her to more-or-less automatically win the challenge, but at least she got a bit of humor in by stealing the leftovers. I did consider her being Alejandro's method of cheating as a parallel to canon, but I figured that nobody would fall for it since Alejandro's been around longer and everyone knows he has a weak stomach. And speaking of Alejandro, I want to thank acosta perez jose ramiro for translating the line our charming villain used when trying to force down the donkey meat.
As for the winner of the eating contest...well, I did initially describe Ella as having a mixture of European and East Asian features when she first appeared way back during the Celebrity Manhunt special; it's only now that her intended heritage was actually relevant. Though she only barely won.
The song this week is, of course, a Shuffled version of 'A Chinese Lesson', and as such I don't have much to comment on it. I will say, however, that according to Wikipedia the opera face paint that Chris wears had a very...fitting meaning. The white indicates his role as a villain, basically, and the pink represents sophistication; it's the exact color combination you'd expect Chris to pick for himself. Neat, huh?
Anywho, that's it for this week. When next we meet it will be 2016, so I hope you enjoy these last few days of the year. Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year!
- Fangren
Appendix: TSWT Eliminated Contestants
Staci - (RETURNED)
Beardo - (18th Place)
Lightning - (17th Place)
Dawn - (Quit Unofficially | RETURNED)
Bridgette - (16th Place)
Geoff - (15th Place)
Scott - (14th Place | Disqualified)
Scarlett - (13th Place)
Sierra - (12th Place)
DJ - (11th Place)
Shawn - (10th Place)
Staci - (9th Place)
Sammy - (8th Place)
Blaineley - (Tied for 7th Place)
Dawn - (Tied for 7th Place)